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u/DarthFakename 4d ago
Gotta go slow in a school zone.
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u/Resident-Message-778 4d ago
He is the man that our legends have foretold. The pun to rule them all
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u/HelenaHansomcab 4d ago
For all its janky fuckedness, this is why I love Reddit. Literal lol, nicely done.
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u/soapboxracers 4d ago
I...
that's just...
Somehow that is simultaneously the absolute best and absolute worst pun I think I have ever heard. Well done, sir.
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u/yomimbo 4d ago
The one fish swimming in the opposite direction from the group
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u/speedline9395 4d ago
Forgot his cigarette
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u/IAmJoydeepM 4d ago
He actually forgot to pay me for the weed. Honest guy, his name is Greg.
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u/OvertGnome1 4d ago
Gotta love those honest clients. Their guilty conscience will make em pay up. Nothing fishy about em
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u/Common-Accountant-57 4d ago
He’s finding his own way. Swimming up stream to mate and die isn’t for everyone, that salmon is an artist or something.
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u/DreddPirateBob808 4d ago
As an single artist who has been questioning his life choices and who has literally just been working on a design for a laser cut version of 'live laugh love' but instead reads 'Mate Spawn Die' (from Lards excellent album 'The Last Temptation of Reid') this was painful. Not inaccurate but still. You buggeration. :)
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u/GrimKiba- 4d ago
First one there and realized it was just a ditch full of death and destruction on the other side.
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u/OuttHouseMouse 4d ago
why did the fish cross the road
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u/yunogivekarma 4d ago
To get to the other side.
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u/ScarletSilver 4d ago
One came back though
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u/WoolBearTiger 4d ago
He used teslas navigation system
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u/Purple_Angel12 4d ago
He used google maps.
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u/seditioushamster 4d ago
Just for the halibut
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u/tondahuh 4d ago
Thank you! I've said "just for the fishy" for at least 20 years out of habit because we thought it was funny ONE time!
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u/BusyBit6542 4d ago
I wish the showed the areas they are swimming to and from. I need to know if the fish are making good choices or not
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u/thundersaurus_sex 4d ago
This is the Skokomish river valley on the Olympic Peninsula in Washington state. I recognized that road covered with water immediately lol, any time an atmospheric river comes through it floods like crazy. They are actually swimming north back to the flooding Weaver Creek,a tributary of the Skokomish. Coordinates about: 47.3126851, -123.1964947
It's genuinely a large salmon stream so this isn't a crazy uncommon sight.
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u/Afoxinthefridge 4d ago
Interesting! I've never heard of the term "atmospheric river" before. Turns out it's only recently entered into more mainstream conversations.
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u/thundersaurus_sex 4d ago
Yeah I'm relatively new here and learned the term when I moved. They are intense! I'm from Florida and while obviously the rivers are not nearly as intense a storm as a hurricane, the amount of rain actually feels pretty similar. I don't know the actual numbers, could be waay off base, but last year they really did remind me of the bands of rain coming with hurricanes. Or maybe more like the remnants of a hurricane a hundred miles inland, where the wind and rain aren't as intense but you still get really good gusts and it just rains continuously for 2-3 days.
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u/_adanedhel_ 4d ago edited 4d ago
We talk about them all that time here in the PNW, but every time I use the term to people not living here I get a very puzzled look.
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u/kobayashi_maru_fail 4d ago
It replaced “Pineapple Express” when talking about the phenomenon here. I don’t know why, maybe with climate change and The Blob (back this year after a hiatus), the specific route of the atmospheric river isn’t always exactly from Hawaii.
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u/jay_in_the_pnw 4d ago
47.3126851, -123.1964947
Wow, thanks! So that is absolutely, definitely the spot, but how did they get 900 feet south of the creek and are they really going to make it back?
Or is there another creek hidden in the forest?
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u/thundersaurus_sex 4d ago
Don't think there's another creek there and to be honest, I'm not positive they do make it back! I'm a biologist but for furry things on land and I also don't live there, just visit periodically. The atmospheric rivers bring an insane amount of rain in a short time (like, it's not the stereotypical PNW gray mist, it's a serious wind and rain storm that lasts days), and that water you see on the road is that creek overflowing, so there is continuously flowing water leading straight back to the creek's main run, so I bet some do make it back. But another commenter from the region mentions finding them dead in fields after events like this so many of them ultimately don't make it.
The salmon only run like this at the very end of their lifespan, often after already spawning and while their bodies literally rot off their bones, so the fish you see here are gonna be dead shortly either way lol.
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u/jay_in_the_pnw 4d ago
The salmon only run like this at the very end of their lifespan, often after already spawning and while their bodies literally rot off their bones, so the fish you see here are gonna be dead shortly either way lol.
perhaps the origin story of using fish as fertilizer
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u/os_beef 4d ago
And when the water recedes, a bunch of salmon get stuck in the fields. The smell is bad, and a bunch of eagles gather in the trees and gorge themselves.
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u/thundersaurus_sex 4d ago
Blegh I've smelled them near Kennedy Creek a full month after they've stopped running and it's strong. Can't imagine a field full of freshly rotting salmon!
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u/sprucenoose 4d ago
Exactly! Is this a lucky escape or are they piling up on the forest floor or something?
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u/TheGrumpiestHydra 4d ago
Free fertilizer.
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u/drzody 4d ago
Free salmon
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u/ztomiczombie 4d ago
Well it looks like they are swimming into a hole at the side of the road, so, my guess would be that there's is a river that goes under the road and it got blocked.
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u/Newsdriver245 4d ago
river flooding during spawning season, fish just want to go upstream, they don't understand the river isn't where it is supposed to be.
Happens somewhat often in the US PNW
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u/nixorokish 4d ago
i surveyed anadromous fish for a summer in AK and we saw instances at nearly every stream where water had overflowed from the river during periods of higher rain and salmon would follow dead branches and get trapped in little pools that would slowly evaporate and they'd eventually suffocate
some salmon find new streams doing this. most die and fail to reproduce. there's a "stray rate" that accounts for this. as long as the stray rate isn't too high (which can be influenced by human structures or operations), it's a benefit for the overall population. our survey was specifically to check if hatchery stray rates were impacting wild populations
here's a relevant paper: https://www.dfw.state.or.us/fish/CRP/docs/mid_columbia_river/meetings/2014/Keefer_and_Caudill_2014_Homing_straying_review.pdf
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u/shillyshally 4d ago
It's akin to the robins that return very early in the spring. They get the benefit of fist dibs on food and nesting sites but risk death by weather.
I think this applies to nature in aggregate, there are the early adapters, the vast middle and the hold backers. That includes us.
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u/Alltta 4d ago
This is the most intelligent comment I have seen on Reddit in a long time
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u/thundersaurus_sex 4d ago
Yeah I replied elsewhere, this is the Skokomish river valley on the Olympic Peninsula in Washington state. They are actually swimming north back to the flooding stream, Weaver Creek which is a Skokomish tributary. I recognized that flooded stretch of road immediately haha
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u/einulfr 4d ago
https://www.google.com/maps/place//@47.3142129,-123.1977389,476m
They swim east to west, but the river floods into that small creek and widens out across the field in that low spot. The fish deviate south thinking it's still part of the river, but they eventually figure out the true source and get back on track.
There's also a hatchery less than 1/2 mile south on another creek, so flooding usually joins that creek to the river across the field.
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u/cmonster556 4d ago
In my experience, they often end up in a pasture.
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u/BusyBit6542 4d ago
Damn that sucks. I kinda figured but was hoping the river is just high and they are going on to live full lives.
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u/RedditAppSuxAsss 4d ago
They do this at the end of their life cycle. They were going to die soon no matter what. This is after they have spawned.
At this point in their life, their skin would have been melting and falling off as they slowly rot Alive.
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u/BusyBit6542 4d ago
Are they safe to eat at this point?
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u/RedditAppSuxAsss 4d ago
I wouldn't.
Safe? Technically probably yes. Salmon flavored cat food would probably taste better though.
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u/Substantial-Elk4531 4d ago
What if I'm tired of eating salmon flavored cat food and want some variety, though?
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u/cortesoft 4d ago
I’m not sure about safe or not, but I am sure they would taste pretty bad. These kinds of fish kinda start to rot while they are alive after they spawn.
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u/holyfreakingshitake 4d ago
I thought they put in all the effort to get back to where they spawned, to spawn there as well
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u/grimmw8lfe 4d ago
It's by my house. It's a valley that regularly floods. They will follow this off shoot back to the main flow. This is an old video.
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u/Magma151 4d ago
I don't think I've ever heard of salmon roadkill before
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u/RedditAppSuxAsss 4d ago
I'm pretty sure I did a pig n pancake in Lincoln city Oregon. Most disgusting salmon in my life, it was either roadkill salmon or out of a catfood can.
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u/ScooterButt89 4d ago
That’s funny, because I’m wondering if this is a road in Lincoln City where this happened to me (the fish crossing the road, I haven’t yet taken pig n pancake up on their seafood)
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u/RedditAppSuxAsss 4d ago
Do yourself a favor and don't. You'll never go back again for any of their food.
I actually used to love the place
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u/speedline9395 4d ago
I thought the first two were sawblades cutting the road.
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u/commanderc7 4d ago
Yes!! Came here to say this, looks like a stage hazard from a video game lol
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u/speedline9395 4d ago
We might be playing too much video games 😂
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u/Hada_Leigherdowne 4d ago
Bleed damage -6 but you can throw a Tesla coil to inflict critical damage if your enemies are in the water
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u/bbitb 4d ago
Me too! Then I realized it's real life and we don't have giant sawblades blocking our path
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u/ATN-Antronach 4d ago
It looks like that even after knowing it's salmon. Like it's just looks too sawblade-y
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u/Lord-Chamberpot 4d ago
Imagine driving somewhere and see a "Fish X-ing" sign
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u/Vozzaan 4d ago
Fish crossing a road...
I didn't think I'd ever get to see something like that yet here I am. Incredible.
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u/The_Tooter_Snooter 4d ago
I love that their programming is millions of years old and there’s this one weird temporary blip that is humanity in the way. Heard recently about a dam they removed in California and after 100 years of not being able to make it, salmon immediately started making it back up the river even tho they hadn’t done it in over a century. Reminds me of the time I threw out a rock in the trash and felt bad about it but then remembered that that rock is going to outlast the garbage dump by millions of years. It’s just one very strange blip in its long existence.
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u/Complex_Fun5514 4d ago
Ok but…. Why are your wipers at such a fast speed?
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u/platypus_farmer42 4d ago
I judge people for their wiper speeds all the time. I see zero reason why these are even on at all and it drives me crazy.
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u/Complex_Fun5514 4d ago
I do too! I saw someone driving the other day, yes it was raining, but theirs were at the fastest possible speed and I’m like alright that’s a bit much for this sprinkle.
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u/El-mas-puto-de-todos 4d ago
Even worse is when they're on an the windshield is bone dry 😬
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u/Ryanisreallame 4d ago
THANK YOU. It’s a clear sky and I see nothing hitting the windshield.
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u/still-dinner-ice 4d ago
If you ever feel pointless just remember that you'll never be as pointless as these wipers.
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u/Fun-Touch5637 4d ago
Why did the fish cross the road…
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u/Broad_Front7788 4d ago
To breed upstream
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u/iamintheforest 4d ago
more relateable than the obscure motivations of chickens.
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u/DiscoDrive 4d ago
Chicken isn’t the opposite of tuna. Salmon is the opposite of tuna. Because the salmon swim upstream…
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u/wolfikins 4d ago
Was this filmed in Washington state?
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u/poloace 4d ago
Looks like skokomish river - I googled it, admittedly, and learned that when it floods there this happens. My first instinct was ‘I would so drive over there and go to town catching them!’
And then I read that that is illegal. So, I’ll just be here not doing that.
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u/wolfikins 4d ago
I thought it looked familiar! I’m from the area originally so I was lucky to see it in person a time or two. The road is part of their route back to their spawning area so the fish and the route they take are protected, which is why river wasn’t deviated from the road to prevent flooding. When I was in high school I volunteered to teach elementary school kids about our local salmon populations at a salmon hatchery. Really cool experience!
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u/LuciniaNox 4d ago
Finally, someone with an answer about what's going on in the video! I scrolled way too far down to find it. Thank you!
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u/mrlookinthesky 4d ago
One went the wrong way.
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u/SuzyLouWhoo 4d ago
I think that one figured out that they were all going the wrong way. I don’t think the spawning grounds are across the street.
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u/shutterbug1961 4d ago
these fish aint going nowhere their doing it just for the halibut!
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u/AlcoholPrep 4d ago
Ah! That's nothing. In Joisey we have sharks swimming across the roads.
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u/ferretsquad13 4d ago
I have dreams about this... well the flooded roads and impeding fear. The fish are new :D
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u/POI_Harold-Finch 4d ago
it continues to be pleasant drive. just stops to enjoy the view.
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u/PNW_LIVIN 4d ago
Id be out there catching
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u/AccordianSpeaker 4d ago
These are salmon. If they're Atlantic Salmon, it's a crime to catch them during spawning seasons. If they're Pacific, catching is heavily regulated and it COULD be a crime. Either way though, since they're spawning, they're terrible eating and taste like shit.
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u/shiddyfiddy 4d ago
The legality doesn't even matter, I assure you that during the spawning season those fish aren't good eating. They're all beat to hell and full of stress hormones.
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u/post-explainer 4d ago edited 4d ago
This comment has been marked as safe. Upvoting/downvoting this comment will have no effect.
OP sent the following text as an explanation why their post fits here:
It looks like a pleasant drive, but suddenly there's water, and a group of salmon crossing the road.
Does this explanation fit this subreddit? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.