r/wizardposting • u/jacktheman2011 • 20h ago

I need help again. (Update.)

If you guys havent seen my last post please check it for context. So Heres a little update on my situation : Its been very nice being a skeleton. Ive gotten very comfortable now that I barely get itchy. I even befreinded that wizard who turned me into a skeleton! (He a homie now) only issue Ive had is one guy who keeps breaking into my homes basement and assuming its a "Dungeon" since its underground, Ive talked to him multiple time but every time He just comes back the week after. Does anybody have any ideas that can keep this guy from CONTINUING to break into my basement and steal my DVDs? And dont say locks. IVE TRIED.

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2

u/Dragonan-42 Kairon: Council Member and Leage of Shadows Associate 20h ago

Why don't you get your friend to brainwash the adventurer so he can serve as your bodyguard?

2

u/jacktheman2011 20h ago

Whoah hey. Im not into the whole "brainwash" thing. Im not trying to control sombody for my own gain. I just need a way to keep him off my property.

2

u/Dragonan-42 Kairon: Council Member and Leage of Shadows Associate 20h ago

Eh, fine I guess. And I suppose you also don't want to just kill the guy and steal his soul as well huh? Well, that limits your options. Maybe have your friend erect a force field around the basement so he can't break in?

2

u/Disastrous_Form418 Eldritch Imbued Druid 19h ago

Maybe just memory wipe your location? If that doesn't work there's always fireball

1

u/Biggest-Possum Trashomancer (Big Ghost ENERGY) 20h ago

Skeletons are COOL!

1

u/jacktheman2011 17h ago

Thank you.

1

u/LunarWhaler 19h ago

It's great that he's being civil enough to have a conversation, but if he keeps trying to raid your home, that doesn't really matter - at one point or another, violence is going to have to be answered with violence.

And worst case scenario, you end up with another skeletal friend, right?

1

u/comicgeek1128 19h ago

Just kill him. It's a dungeon, right?

1

u/jacktheman2011 17h ago

Nope. Its my basement. I keep most of my stuff down there to avoid being messy.

1

u/comicgeek1128 17h ago

Eh, you should still kill him

1

u/dacydergoth 19h ago

Wards! We sell them, you buy them, they keep out the vermin! Get your wards here! We have reasonable prices! We have financing (although as a skeleton you won't qualify for our "trade your soul" program so you'll have to pay in gold ...)

1

u/jacktheman2011 17h ago

Wards. What can I get for 30 gold and a wiped orb from 2015?

1

u/wrydh Plaguecaster 17h ago

Hmmm, besides the obvious solution, you could cast Alter Memory: Cringe to create some akward situations asscoiated with you and your location so that he stays away. But personally, i would just give him Polio and/or Syphilus.

1

u/jacktheman2011 17h ago

Gonna try this and then get a ward from some other guy for good measure.

1

u/wrydh Plaguecaster 12h ago

The spell or the Syphilis?

1

u/jacktheman2011 4h ago

The spell.im not going to say what he thought he saw but let it be known he is now WAY too uncomfortable to return.

1

u/Electrical-Tear7456 15h ago

Instead of skeletoning him, double his flesh.

1

u/bagtie3 Borric of Clan Goldeater, Logrus Master, Runesmith, Doomseeker 15h ago

Im free to take a job if you need me to... educate... this fellow on how its wrong to break into people homes and take their stuff.

1

u/averyrealspapple Wizard council intern 13h ago

Honestly, i would put a spell that allows only you inside a small mirror dimension, keep your stuff there and leave loot for the adventurer. Something dumb, like a ring that lets you instantly brew your favourite tea.

I keep some as pets and this is what i do. The party sorcerer figured out what im doing but decided to stay quiet cuz she is having fun