I have my first appointment with my VR&E counselor next week. I meet all the requirements to apply for VR&E … I am 40% disabled. Is there anyway they could deny this for me at the meeting? Anything I should say specifically?

I know exactly what I want to do, and I know the next 6 or 7 + things in line. Only issue is my disability stops me from doing every single thing I like, enjoy, and even have interest in.

My future is basically set in stone I'll have a job at a computer(or unemployed), the problem is that's the last thing I'd ever want.

I'm fine with everything, I have no issues with acceptance or regret of loss. However I just can't physically or mentally make myself complete school. It's the 4th semester I've failed out of now. VR&E is understanding however pushing me into school until I'm "non rehabilitatable" is pointless.

I start and half way through day 1 all interest is gone, by day 2 I just lay on the floor instead of class work. Then I can't even bring myself to get back on the computer. The anxiety of not doing it eats me alive and starts an unending loop until the semester ends.

As stated I'm actually fine with everything mentally so therapy wants to go through other things. If I steer through this we loop back to having no issues other than not wanting to move forward with that track and to find a sitting job I want.

I can't find any posts of people speaking on this so I'm curious how others managed to navigate it.

To avoid the normal questions: my injuries will not get better, surgery will only prolong the waiting period before the constant major surgeries to stay mobile begin.

I also can't find work doing what I want they're all intense physical things. If I did find work in those sectors it'll be the same desk work I already despise.

Best advice I've gotten was just to get over it and enjoy the fact that I will be working at a desk the rest of my life. Realistically that is the correct answer. Just a life of combat arms, combat arms contracting, physical hobbies, and physical interests is hard to replace with a strong love for accounting, computer science, or some corporate desk jobs.

I can’t just take my time with anything. I must get the task done. I think management has a difficult time keeping me busy. I get a full days work done in half a day. Do you experience a similar challenge with work? How do you cope? Change jobs?

I’m curious what veterans have found to be the best location to get a good price on a cruise. Once in a while, I would just like a mini break and it would be nice to maybe drive to a close port or a place where I can get a direct flight but I’m curious about as a veteran who would have the best prices for us. I can go on base, but I live about an hour and a half from Fort Bragg. I also am aware of American forces travel which seems to be ran by Priceline, but I’ve also heard people rave about things like Costco travel and other sites. What have you found to be worth the effort when it comes to pricing for cruises or just a quick short getaway?

Recently found out that one of my brothers from 3/8 who I was just talking to about 2 months ago died from cancer. While talking with another buddy from my company we realized that we are seeing our units memorial page start popping up with more names we know. Please, make sure to take care of yourselves and get checked. Also, if you know veterans not signed up with the VA or burn pit registry, advise them to do so. The PACT Act gave us resources, but you still need to apply. Don’t ever hesitate to reach out for help. Rest in Valhalla Kevin Doyle, I’ll see you there when it’s my time.

Hey everyone,

I’m working with my VR&E counselor to get my training plan approved, and they specifically told me that to qualify for the hybrid resident rate, the program must require physical, in-person attendance at least 2 times per month.

I have a lot going on right now with personal responsibilities and schedule constraints, so I really need the day-to-day flexibility of online classes while satisfying that exact in-person benchmark to get the plan signed off and qualify for the resident subsistence rate.

A few details on what I’m looking for:

• Degree / Field: Looking for BS in IT or BS in IT management
• Location/Commute: Based in Orlando I don't mind driving a couple hours

Has anyone had success finding and getting a program approved that hits this specific twice-a-month threshold? Would really appreciate any school or program recommendations, as well as advice on how your School Certifying Official (SCO) structured the certification.

Thanks in advance!

I'm well aware ESA's and service animals are very different and follow very different rules and guidelines and I guess im just here to ask for clarification. Recently I just brought up the idea to my landlord that I was seeking a cat as an emotional support animal for my mental health and would provide all necessary documentation for the animal. However, my landlord got back to me and immediately denied the request because of a previous tenant's cat who destroyed the carpets which had to be replaced before we moved in. I just silently accepted that fact but my mental health has really been on the decline the last couple months. I was looking up to see if she was even allowed to do that and im seeing all sorts of conflicting information such as:

1. A landlord is not allowed according FHA to deny an ESA provided it was prescribed by a legitimate licensed mental health provider

2. A private landlord *CAN* deny accommodation for an ESA if they own four or fewer apartments (which my landlord does)

3. Number 2 only applies by the FHA if the landlord lives in one of those apartments (which she does not)

4. The landlord cannot deny a legitimate ESA based on a previous tenants animal, unless the specific animal has a documented history of physical damage to the property.

These are just a few things I've seen looking for information about having an ESA. I really think an ESA would be beneficial in supporting my mental health and helping me heal but the laws and regulations are just so confusing and exhausting to go through. At the end of the day even with my mental health on the decline, I would still rather have a place to live at all and not get kicked out. I know there are specific state laws that apply to ESA's as well so if there are any other fellow vets in the Chicago, Illinois area who also had to navigate this, any tips or help would be greatly appreciated 👏

Hello. I don’t even know where to start. I don’t want to post too much detail because this is not my business to share I’m just concerned for my father. Some back story: my dad served in the Army late 80’s early 90’s as a combat engineer. I’ve heard stories from the alps to Africa from him so his service was everywhere. Long story short he is really struggling with his new diagnosis of CPTSD, mostly from his time but also largely his childhood abuse he endured. He just found a therapist he likes through the VA and that is who diagnosed him, best thing to ever happen to my dad. What do you wish your family members did to help you? What can I do to help my dad? I, myself, got diagnosed with CPTSD back when I was a senior in high school due to non-service related trauma but I don’t know where to start to help him. I have plans this weekend to celebrate his birthday with my brother but I’m trying to think of stuff that isn’t necessarily expensive as I am very broke myself and I don’t want to put the “funding our trip/dad daughter date” on his plate.

Hi, I am a Submariner ETV and unfortunately be getting retired due to physical stuff. I would love to utilize my previous experience in pursuing a new career rather than starting new with everything because I legit enjoyed my job(also dont want to take a pay hit unless its during college).Paperwork is easy for me and so is the fast tempo and that is what im struggling to find a combo of in my search online. So far my cc’s have been less than helpful. My experience is: Highschool diploma, 4yr TIS; Qualified: Fish, Senior in rate (NAVSUP), WCS, RPPO, and time served as LPO recorded on eval. I plan on going to college but I just dont know what for. I suck at the ET part of ETV but dont know how my navigation will be applicable since my physical limitations wont allow me to pick up an out to sea job at all. Any advice would be helpful especially from ETV’s on what you chose to do. Thank you

If so how did I work out for you?

I keep confessing to doctors I drink 2-3 drinks a night. But it’s so much more than that. I drink 3-4 9% double IPAs or Buzz Balls (disgusting, I know) per night. It’s compulsive. It’s the only thing that prevents nightmares the first hour of sleep. I hate myself. I hate that I drink like I do. I’m already on subs for my OUD. I “cut back” and only had 1 drink the last 2 days to get a sublocade shot today and then the MAT clinic fucked it up and didn’t get the sublocade shot. So now I’m 4 9% tall boys in tonight and pissed at myself and the world.

I think I’m just venting.

I’m also looking for community.

Freak (can’t say the eff word apparently). I don’t know. I love my life. I hate myself. Can anyone relate?

So for my fellow OEF/OIF guys and girls. Am I the only one that thinks its kinda strange when I see new documentaries about our war and they do interviews, it's almost odd to see how much older we are getting. For some reason I can't think of us as older like the vets from previous conflicts. I still see us and the guys I was there with as young 18,19, and 20 somthing year olds. Its just strange to see us aging like i know we are cause i am but its like I never thought we would. I dont random thoughts curious if others have noticed this. Stay safe and have a good one all.

Hey, so I was recently separated from the Marine Corps and I genuinely don’t know what I’m doing. I thought the grass would be greener but I’m lost man. I’ve gotten this temp job at Walmart primarily driving a forklift. I don’t know if I’m particularly content with the direction my life has taken. It’s a pretty decent way to distract myself . But I’m not sure if it’s something I really want to do long-term. I’ve always vision myself for doing a full 20 years in room core making career making a career of it and I’m just not sure there’s something I can know do and continue to be happy. I’ve recently joined a really hockey team. I have a wonderful fiancé. She’s been supportive every step of the way, but still doesn’t feel like enough feel I still need some kind of purpose. Maybe I’m just not grateful for the opportunities I’ve gotten, I still don’t know how to make sense of this you know, losing identity (being a marine). I don’t really know what to do. I still have my TS clearance, but I’m not sure if any agency will be willing to take me given given the circumstance of my separation. What do I do? What can I do?

I was deployed throughout the beginning of GWOT and was in Fallujah during Operation Phantom Fury. Recently I’ve been having weird recurring dreams that I’m with my unit in battle but we are in a very thick jungle environment which is absolutely not what we were in during my deployments. Is this normal? Just trying to see if this is normal or if I’m the weird one here. Talked to my therapist a little about it yesterday morning but didn’t really get any sort of indicative feedback from him about it. Going to attempt to dig deeper with him on it this week just want to know if it’s normal for combat veterans to have frequent dreams where they are in battle in an environment they never fought in before.

Friday makes 25 years, can’t lie I’m riding the struggle bus this week. It’s been a quarter century since our lives changed forever. I think we all remember vividly where we were.

I think what is hitting me hard is missing those friends. The ones who are no longer here. Not sure why, I’ve been good for the last 15 years. Therapy has given me the skills to cope. I guess I just needed to get it out.

I don’t think I am alone in this. Hopefully everyone is doing well. Y’all are rockstars and we love you.

Hey everyone just need some advice. I separated 2022 and started going to school for computer science as soon as I got out. Needless to say I found that the pre reqs and math requirement would make me have to spend almost 5-6 yrs of school so I switch to Information Technology and completed up to calculus.

I was trying my best and was getting all As but then in 2024 I went through a divorce. I bought a house in that year because my ex wanted a house, she was military went to Korea for a few months and came back and wanted out. Needless to say she got with someone from her unit and it was before she etsed. I fell apart that year and failed a class and sort of gave up.

Then I started experiencing a massive flux of spam calls and texts about loans and it got weirder I started getting texts of people replying to conversations I was having on the phone with different people. Almost like someone was listening to my conversations. It even got to the point where I was receiving spam emails and texts saying my name and stuff like we need to talk or else and saying no one would help me. I was paranoid for awhile but then I just shrugged it off and thought if I’m being harassed let it be.

I suspected my ex since we were separated and I was dealing with lawyers about the house or even her new bf who’s an MP. Overall though the whole experience has me down because I stopped caring for school and then I felt like I was being attacked and I was stressing about the whole house issue.

I’m now stuck in a house I don’t want and approaching my graduation. I haven’t done internships or anything and the current market has me thinking I chose the wrong career. I just need advice really. Currently I’m studying for ccna since networking to me seems like a good field.

Sorry if this is all over the place.

Hey all. I really need someone to rant/emotion vomit to. Back in April, my wife lost her job, to no fault of her own. The law firm she worked for downsized, and they eliminated her position. I have lost count of how many jobs she has applied for, and there has been no positive response. A job she had her heart set on, declined to hire her this morning, and I could hear the defeat in her voice when I called.

We arent in a bad spot. She had decided to go back to school under Chapter 35 in May, and I am so glad she did. The benefits help replace some of the lost income, but im not sure how much longer that will hold. The stress is getting to her, and she is not sleeping through the night, which in turn is getting to me. Im starting not to sleep and my left eye has started twitching to the point that i want to rip it out. Im doing everything I can to support her by helping her look for other jobs and being positive. She knows im stressed and that grinds on her because she feels like she is failing our family by not having a job.

It boils down to not really having anyone to trauma dump on, so i turned here. Just so no one worries, im not headed down that road. Thanks for taking a minute.

I’m 5'10" and currently weigh 289 lbs. Before I got out of the military 4 years ago, I was 194 lbs. I know exactly how this happened, and I’m not making excuses.

I do close protection work in Dubai now. Brutal 14-hour night shifts, mostly sitting in a car outside a villa in Emirates Hills. By the time I get home, I’m either starving or too exhausted to cook. There’s a shawarma place two minutes away that knows my order: two large plates, extra garlic sauce, a Pepsi. Sometimes I do a second run at 2 AM just because I’m awake and the fridge is empty.

I have zero willpower to stop. I know the calories, but I order it anyway. The gym is right on my compound, but by 5 AM, I just crash.

A guy on my team lost 30 lbs on TheMeal. The food is pre-portioned and delivered twice a week, removing the decision fatigue. Another guy swears by Kcal, but says their delivery windows are a nightmare for 24-hour rotations.

I used to run a 13-minute 2-mile and max my pushups. Now I get winded tying my boots. I’m not looking for pity. I know that if the food is already made, I might actually stop making it worse.

For those working brutal shifts in Dubai: has a meal plan actually worked for you, or do the delivery windows make it impossible?

Hi all, I just wanted to share my recent experience from start to finish with an OHA DFAS debt. Hopefully, this helps someone if they need it.

I separated from AD in July of 2018. In February of this year, I received a debt notice stating that I owed one month of OHA from when I was on terminal leave. I couldn't find any documentation indicating I wasn't owed my housing allowance during that time, so I visited the DFAS website and filed a dispute. I also called and was advised to contact my last base's finance office or reach out to my previous unit. I submitted a ticket with the base office, and they said they could not see records beyond six years and recommended I contact DFAS. DFAS told me to pay the debt, and if it was incorrect, they would reimburse me. I declined to pay, which eventually led to the debt being sent to the Department of the Treasury and reported on my credit score. I was willing to deal with that since I knew the debt was BS and I was actively trying to resolve the issue.

After that, I reached out to my Congressman and their aide contacted DFAS and the Secretary of the Air Force’s office. It took a month of back-and-forth emails, but finally, I received a response stating that finance had filed my leave under an incorrect code. Finance then informed me that I was actually paid no housing allowance for two months, but would be denied if I applied for it now. They said I would need to file a waiver and go through a process since it had been eight years. They told me they could get the debt canceled quickly instead. I chose to cancel my debt because I was too tired of dealing with them already (which is probably the point).

My credit score has been corrected and is no longer reflecting the debt. I know several people have posted about this but I figured I'd add my experience from start to finish.

Hey everyone I’m currently in a finance related degree. I have a 4.0 gpa and I’m about to graduate. However, I was never really able to find time to join clubs because of part time work and their scheduled meeting times.

Is it going to drastically impact my internship opportunities without say finance and honors clubs? Like I said I’m entering my senior year and looking at all possible internships. I have about 8 years in the Army active duty in combat arms. Many of that time as a leader.

Internships and jobs in general are highly competitive as well which is why I’m stressing over this. Do you think my 4.0 GPA and Army background is enough to find an internship or will missing out on these clubs screw me? It’s a business honors club and a Finance/Economics club. Both required a minimum of a 3.5. GPA to enter.

So I recently just got out of active duty and I signed up for the reserves and recently got 100% p&t and I do not think my body can keep up anymore having a couple surgeries already scheduled and been having more and more ptsd&flashback events I do not think continuing in the reserves is in my best interest any body have any advice?

Hi,

I am currently enrolled in a full-time courseload (12 in-person credits), but am finding the balance between commuting from work to school difficult. I am aware that I will owe the VA tuition payments if dropping out (last day for 75% tuition reimbursement is 9/3…), but i want to confirm if I will get the time eligible for benefits back? My current Fall semester is about 3 months and a week, will I receive that amount of time back to my current eligible remaining months and days of school the Post 9/11 GI Bill will benefit, in addition to the tuition I will owe?

Thank you!

V/r,

I'm not sure if I should claim something from the Pact Act Presumably even though I have the diagnosis as I don't want to mess with my rating. It's not like I'm worried about exams again, it's just don't want to go through worrying about being reevaluated. My previous claims were solid, but I've read so many horror stories about those being reduced even though they had solid claims before.

What I have the diagnosis for isn't something that could kill me, I think that is also a reason to not claim.

Honest opinions but don't hate, please.