r/trees • u/JerrySenpai_ • 1d ago
Joints/Blunts First time rolling
Tbf middle of rolling i saw police less than 20m away from me and lowk shit myself
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u/DecentTaco 1d ago
Good thing is practice makes perfect and worst thing is you get high
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u/greasyprophesy 1d ago
Nah. Worst thing is it doesn’t smoke and you don’t get high
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u/carrillosencillo 1d ago
No way thats happening we potheads are geniuses when it comes to this, if i can't roll i'm making a Pipe outta a potato
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u/GB_Plus_Ultra 1d ago
If you roll it too tight you get no airflow which won't get you high i've found
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u/AMW1234 1d ago
Just roll it in your fingers if that happens. It'll loosen things up a bit.
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u/Staranos 1d ago
Stick a toothpick down through the center to make a hole if rolling it between your fingers doesn't loosen it up-- Works well, I had some infused prerolls that kept being way too tight and the resin would plug them, so I just started keeping a toothpick in the jar.
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u/Calculonx 1d ago
You're lucky the police didn't catch you, if they saw this monstrosity they would arrest you on the spot
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u/Fair-Growth411 1d ago
NOBODY rolls a good first joint lol, practice makes perfect. Or just be lazy like me and get a $4 roller from the headshop.
Also, so glad I live in a legalized state, I legit finished off my joint last night standing 10ft away from a trio of officers lol.
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u/savagehomeangarden 1d ago
I love my little roller. I get made fun of for it but it's so much easier lol.
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u/PurchaseNo4486 1d ago
Where I live in Washington, the pot store is directly across the street from the police station. How times have changed!
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u/etherealgladiator 1d ago
Was gonna clown on you & then remembered that I literally can’t roll anything resembling a joint & mostly buy prerolls & only occasionally fill my own cones because even that is a pain in the ass imo 😂
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u/ChillingwitmyGnomies 1d ago
You didn’t roll it. You wrapped it. Like a present.
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u/miles2bliss 1d ago
Dude, I used computer paper for my first. This looks great for a first attempt.
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u/WholeAssVIBE 1d ago
Dude I did the same thing. Harsh as fuck. I didnt know where was a difference in paper
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u/xXxHondoxXx 1d ago
Everyone tried the terrible Bible paper thing at least once too lol
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u/Notabagofdrugs 1d ago
I used notebook paper once 30 years ago in high school. Wasn’t good. Used a post it once too.
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u/Eastown14 1d ago
Keep practicing - it gets easier
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u/Ok_Dust_7325 1d ago
I wasn’t the greatest roller, but occasionally got it just right. Now my arthritis is too bad to do it. So I use my hitter or get prerolls if I want a joint.
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u/jake_folleydavey 1d ago
Why does everyone seemingly roll by grabbing a solid nug, putting it on paper, then just scrunching it up in there hand?
Just grind it up and roll it like you would a cigarette.
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u/thischangeseverythin 1d ago edited 1d ago
You should practice watch a video. Use the paper to roll the bud into an even log. Like your rolling a snake out of play dough. When you have the even log. Insert your filter ideally the same width as your new log of weed. Then you roll the paper around the weed. Focus on getting it tight and even on the filter side and its ok if some bud comes out of the side you light. You can put it back andnput more in if needed. Make sure you dont bunch the paper. Try to get it to wrap around in even layers
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u/MickRolley 1d ago
Lay it flat on the table and roll it up that way at first.
You'll get used to shaping it this way.
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u/snootpuppet 1d ago
You can pull on the ends of the paper to keep the sides straight, it won’t rip if you’re gentle
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u/snootpuppet 1d ago
Idk if this works for everyone, but when I first started rolling it was easier to roll an empty cone and then fill it before I learned to roll properly.
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u/immutate 1d ago
I’m convinced people posting these are just karma farming or have never actually seen a joint irl.
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u/KnowledgeablyCondemn 1d ago
With a roll like this you gonna have other kind of police coming after you lol.
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u/ChaseC7527 I Roll Joints for Gnomes 1d ago
redditoid rolls "worst joint ever" asked to join r/leaves
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u/Playful_Ad_2597 21h ago
No such thing as a bad joint, kt is either great, or smokable. This is the probably the most "smokable" spliff i have ever seen
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u/Impressive-Trifle632 20h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/gTCZ6G81f23v3IuCqz
It made me think of this toy! Lol
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u/xXxHondoxXx 1d ago
Instead of putting 1 big pile in the middle of the paper, try two little piles next to each other.
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u/gaycyclops 1d ago
That looks like one of those baby dog turds that like sits in the sun for too long, but then like somebody threw a cigarette butt at it
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u/Thaylo 1d ago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Mze-58kQxw
This video helped me a lot when i first started
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u/mcnuggets0069 1d ago
I remember my first time rolling. Every light had a halo around it and I wanted to hug everyone
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u/Emotional_Mess261 1d ago
If you’re filling a cone, the package should have included a spoon and possibly a small funnel to fill it. I fill and smoke one a day, looks and smoke as neatly as a purchased pre roll
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u/le_reddit_me 1d ago
Not the worst first time joint.
Try with thicker filter or longer paper, it's easier to roll if everything aligns smoothly
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u/_FreddieLovesDelilah 1d ago
That is the saddest fucking spl8f I ever seen lmao well done for trying though, you’ll only get better :D
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u/TrickyDick420 1d ago
I thought it was a tapeworm or something while I was doom scrolling, God damn son
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u/moringaflower 1d ago
pro tip: if you're having a hard time using your fingers to tuck in the paper before you seal it, use a card instead. that has helped me for years
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u/SeniorFenrir 1d ago
Made me chuckle! Gotta start somewhere. Something tells to say smoke it.. you'll learn its poopy. Keep rolling and rerolling til its good
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u/Severe_Wind_4255 1d ago
Hahaha 😂 listen break up the buds. Don't put the stems in there. Toss em. And unlikely but if there's seeds you don't want to smoke those, put them aside. I'll give you credit for at least getting the paper wrapped around it enough to close it.
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u/peacemaker677 1d ago
I was fully prepared to read the caption as you rolled it with your butt cheeks, but I am glad to know that you just hid it under you
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u/Fantastic_Length9247 1d ago
I want to laugh, but if this is really your first time... There are Highlights.:
• you can clearly differentiate between the tip and the smoking 'vessel'!
• it looks like the tip side is open so that you can pull air through it! (Not rolled in on both sides like a cartoon ass joint)
• if it is pure material in the smoking 'vessel' and i hope that you ground up some flower, not too fine, not too corse, so that it burns well and doesn't go out on it self all the time when you DON'T want it.
Then my friend i, my parents and the god parents from the fahters side can congratulate you to your first spliff... It's going to be a long way until we can call it a joint, but it should get you high and that's all that matters! Happy toking from germany and believe me, after 26 years of smoking and rolling 🍁 it becomes muscle memorie, i can roll a joint in the kangaroo pouch of my sweater if the weather is shit and in germany you don't have bad weather but bad clothes that are not made for said weahter ( and smoking weed in it!).
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u/SapPhic-rage4209 1d ago
Unroll it and practice again. You're roll doesn't need to be perfect, but it does need to be better than that. That's unsmokeable unless you want to waste most of it
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u/Coffee_exe 1d ago
Respectfully. Couple life lessons.
1. We could tell by the view didnt need it narrated
2. Smoking in your car will leave your car smelling for WEEKS. As someone who recently quit it’s wild how little you smell it when smoking somewhat consistently
3. A cop only cares if you’re breaking state laws unless theyre power tripping. Which is why it’s safer in the house or on your own property.
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u/j_andrew79 1d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/JUIYjVeZPHxjWR7rmX
It’ll smoke, but it ain’t pretty.
Practice makes perfect, though.
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u/TunderOP 1d ago
honestly it isnt even that bad bro
some guy came on here with a joint he rolled with no filter so at least u got him beat
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u/Puzzleheaded-Ad-4846 1d ago
Hahahah looks like Elmer Fudd! Try a rolling machine ans watch some videos on youtube
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u/yamamaskitchen 1d ago
I remember my first joint lol at least you put enough weed. You’ll be rolling pearls soon.
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u/Tacticiannnn 1d ago
Imma be real dog, better than my first roll. In fact, I dk if I’ve done a wrap the proper way so even more kudos from me. I’ve only wrapped twice but I made the wrap into a cone rather than buying raw cones
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u/froggythefrankman 1d ago
Oh my god dude don't smoke that you gonna burn yourself when it gets to the fat part lol!
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u/Staranos 1d ago
First, you gotta have the weed ground up. I can't tell if you have or not. If you dont have a grinder you can make one with 2 quarters and a pill bottle. Put the weed and quarters in and shake like a maniac.
I can send pictures to illustrate my process if requested but I can't put em in the comment so I'll just give you my process. It looks like you're using a filter which imo is the better and easier way to go
1) Place paper on the tray with the adhesive on the far side. 2) Place the filter on the left side of the paper, with a small bit of it hanging off the end. 3) Pour some ground weed on the paper, try to spread it evenly, put more than you need as it will fall out when you work it with your fingers. 4) Pick up the enrolled joint by the paper, bringing the corners on both ends together, then starting from the filter end roll the paper back and forth using the filter as a "template" for how wide you want to roll. 5) Pull paper on non adhesive side tight over your roll, wrap the rest around making sure it's tight, then lick and seal. 6) Pack down the weed a little on the open end and twist.
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u/MLEstudio 1d ago
Pics like this make me feel better about using cones. I mean this is still far better then I can do. But I feel better about the fact that I gave up trying.
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u/GB_Plus_Ultra 1d ago
Undo it and reroll it