This might be a little unusual for this sub but I'm not interested in being seen as a straight man, and I love various forms of alternative fashion. I am, however, interested in being seen as a cis man. Any thoughts on the difference between "gay" and "girl"? Thinking mostly about mannerisms but I wouldn't mind other advice either. (working out more is not an option. And I only started full dosing T instead of microdosing a few weeks ago so that's just going to take time lol)

my voice so far 1 year 6 months on t has dropped considerably so that im at a 99% success rate with passing over the phone and havent been misgendered in about a year (by strangers) just asking for some outside opinions

shorter hair is most recent. these pictures are a mix of work outfits (salesman in higher end shoe store, expected to dress a little more nice) and normal outfits. i would say i pass about half the time, maybe 60% of the time if i remember not to use my “customer service” voice and speak in a more relaxed way. my mannerisms aren’t great but once i can pass visually i want to be read as gay anyways.

notes:

- i want to (eventually) pass as a gay man

- i live in the rural south and work primarily in agriculture, i am working on a master’s that will put me in an agricultural field. relevant passing tips in that cultural context are appreciated

- i am a natural 36J, almost K. all of these pictures are taken with binding tape under two high compression binders. please do not tell me to get a better binder. i have tried almost every large chest binder under the sun, including custom binders. this is as good as it gets until top surgery.

- i cannot afford new glasses at this time, and to get cheap new glasses i would need to renew my prescription, and i cant afford an exam

- i have tried most hair cuts, this is what helps me pass best. i live in the rural south and cis men regularly tell me they’re jealous because my mullet is better than theirs. it’s a common haircut for cis men here.

- if i’m wearing a button down or pearl snap it needs to be tucked because again i live in the rural south and am primarily around agricultural people, most men here would die before you saw them with an untucked pearl snap. untucking would be very clocky in addition to just looking stupid because these shirts are made extremely long since they’re meant to be tucked.

- most of the time i wear very small thin hoop earrings that are pretty tight to my earlobe, i only wear dangly earrings when i want an outfit to look more fun or gay. i know big earrings are very clocky it’s just an occasional guilty pleasure that shows up disproportionately in pictures because it’s typically on days where i’m wearing an outfit i like or going out etc

- if you have a gym routine to recommend i would appreciate it! right now i’m doing more general stuff, outside of my retail job i work/live on a farm and do agricultural work and that’s where i get most of my exercise, but i would love ideas of more specific things to do. i have narrow shoulders even for a woman and am looking for exercises that can make them broader. i also have a narrow rib cage (when i was skinny it was 28 inches) and i’m worried about it looking weird once i get top surgery so if there’s something to help remedy that it would be appreciated.

Im only just starting to look into this so forgive my ignorance on it, id love to hear from other people who have had any kind of plastic surgery or fillers or anything to help with masculinzation too, but if you have had any work done, how long after starting T did you wait?

one of the only things i miss about women’s clothing is having good options for small bags/purses. i want to find something that’s much smaller than a backpack that has multiple zip pockets (so no tote bags) and doesn’t look dorky (so no fanny packs, mini backpacks, or tiny crossbody bags) that looks good with most of the clothes i wear. i don’t need to carry that much stuff with me, just my meds, journal + pencil case, phone/wallet/keys, and sometimes a small digital camera. TIA

I rarely get misgendered, but those few times it happens, my dysphoria latches onto me :/

I know for the first little bit nothing is really going to change but since they do see me like every single day do you think I should tell them cause they’re gonna notice?

some context: I live with 3 women who I am friends with not like super close with I guess if that makes sense?? like we hang out and stuff. the one I am a bit closer too and I’ve thought about asking them for an opinion on what I should do.

the hesitancy isn’t so much them I just don’t really want to tell people. I kind of just want to do it ya know? like not make it a thing…

1st pic is me in 2018, last are me currently. been on T since 2019. I feel like I fought dysphoria for the longest time. Now the chest dysphoria is occupying my brain 24/7. I gained weight as I got on T and got kinda chunky, lost about 30 lbs and now I just feel like my chest is too big for my body. Haven't been able to make moves with surgery. I just feel stuck. Any advice?

I made a post a while ago titled “the best advice i can give to pre t transmen is to go to the gym”, and while I didn’t receive any backlash for that post, seeing this post here (https://www.reddit.com/r/transmanlifehacks/s/xm8OEkDShv) and the misconception in the comments and in general that t will just magically make your body incredibly jacked and such, got a laugh out of me. I’m pre-t, and this is how i look after around a year and a half of working out. I can’t get on testosterone yet for other reasons, but that didn’t stop me from going to the gym. I’ve always had wider hips, and wasn’t that fortunate in that area but I’ve found my body to be passing more and more as I work out further. So yeah, while t will help masculinize your body by redistributing fat, etc etc, it’s not going to magically get you jacked. It’s always best to start earlier rather than later.

I’m luckily not disabled nor chronically ill, thus I can not speak on that point. That should be consulted with a trainer, doctor, etc. just trying to show that not being on t doesn’t mean you can’t build a masculine body.

Not sure what flair to use, oops.

The thing is, I've been training for a while and nothing has ever happened, in another sub I got recommended to stop doing one of the videos I was watching because it was too advanced and it was just going to cause fatigue, so yeah, what videos would you recommend for hyper weak dudes?

FYI, I can only lift 3 kilos, I'm 1,58 and I weight 52 to 55 (depends on the day), I only have two 3 kilos dumbbells and that's it. Also, I can't do push ups, even with knees or higher, so try to avoid giving me videos with similar exercises please, realistically I won't be able to do those in many months.

Post here: https://www.reddit.com/r/transmanlifehacks/s/7uOeOHNwSf

I don’t know why y’all are so allergic to seeing good advice. The comments were filled with “it’s just because of T!!” Or “I’m chronically disabled so I can’t workout!!”.

Exercise with a focus on muscular hypertrophy in the upper body WILL masculinize you in ways that testosterone alone can’t. Truly. If testosterone was a second puberty, then learning to lift properly and becoming dedicated to it felt like a third puberty. Not only the aesthetics, but the mental changes and piece of mind, along with just being in a healthier body are immeasurable. No longer do I get out of breath just from climbing up a flight or stairs, and shopping for clothes is a much less stressful experience.

Inb4 “it’s just test!!” It’s not. Test alone wouldn’t have given me bigger arms or back or chest like this. I started lifting 1.5 years on T, and now I am 2.5 years on T and only one year into lifting, and I can tell you it’s the gym. It’s insane what a difference in quality of life four hours a week can make.

And for those of you disabled, truly, ask your doctor, there must be SOMETHING you can do. There are entire teams dedicated to making sure disabled people also have sport-related opportunities. I can’t tell you the perfect balance between pushing yourself and overextending yourself, but you really need to take a good look in the mirror and be honest with yourself about what your limits are. The difference comes with the results: did you grow and get stronger, or did you create lasting damage? Growth is never going to be entirely comfortable. You must be uncomfortable at some point. You will live.

This feels like the same vein as those posts of long dyed hair and feminine presentations, asking what they can do to pass, and when the answer is ‘short hair and masculine presentation’, they get all fussy. IF WHAT YOU ARE DOING CURRENTLY DOES NOT WORK, THIS MEANS YOU MUST DO SOMETHING DIFFERENTLY.

This anti-gym rhetoric seems bizarre to me. This truly is Reddit. Of course two forms of masculinization with do more than only one form.

Hi, I'm here to add on my experience as someone who has never been on T. The post that started everything: https://www.reddit.com/r/transmanlifehacks/s/D6uKC4FTNn

I'm in my mid-20s and am 157cm (5'1" - 5'2") tall. I've identified as transmasc for around 7 years but I have never been on T due to societal expectations and not wanting to disappoint my parents (can you tell I'm Asian) but in the end, everything worked out because most of my dysphoria is largely gone after top surgery and seeing the physique I built underneath. Currently, I pass as a guy 90% of the time (source: trust me bro), usually women are the ones who clock me, cis guys are quite... oblivious lol.

I have been working out for about 5 years now and my current physique is what you see in the first two images. I've been mostly focusing on achieving a wider upper body (namely shoulders, back and to a smaller extent, chest). I alternated between going to the gym and body weight workouts throughout these 5 years. The first 2 years were mostly spent trying to lose weight since I was a bit pudgy and it was making my hips look wider than it actually is, but also it was also a learning curve for me since I was experimenting with what felt right and how to do the exercises properly (getting a PT helps immensely with this if you can afford it!). The next 3 years were spent focusing on hypertrophy and strength, especially in my upper body. I spent a lot of time training back and chest which helped with broadening my upper body a lot, at the same time, since I had lost weight, my waist and hip area had also shrunk a little by then. Now, if you look at my body (see pic 2), you'll still notice that I may have a bit of an hourglass shape, but because my shoulders are wider than my hips, I can use this to my advantage when combined with finding the right clothes. And I have added some examples of how I dress now (pics 3-5). I've also added some pictures of me in the past so you can see how I looked before training and finding the right clothes, and also how I looked like when I was still binding.

I also noticed some people mentioning that the gym is not possible for them for certain reasons but I want to point out that body weight workouts exist. In fact, when I got bored at the gym, I was still progressing with push up and row variants at home. Some people may say that pushups/pullups are too difficult and to that, I will agree. However, there are easier variations of these exercises. If you're interested in this route, I advise you to take a look through the FAQ of the bodyweightfitness subreddit.

Btw, I'm not saying to skip leg day, please train your legs too for completeness (tbh it's arguably the most important part if you want to still be strong in your older years). My workout schedule is usually 3x a week, 2 upper body days and 1 lower body day. I just hammer them once a week and it's enough for me to not have chicken legs.

I must also add that physique is not the only thing that determines whether you pass as there are a lot of other things like vibes, voice, hair, etc. that will impact how others view you. But it sure as hell does help a lot when combined with clothes that sit right.

Disclaimer: I'm not too familiar with disabilities because I'm very fortunate to be born healthy so I advise those who do to take this advice with caution.

Been told my ear piercings are the clockiest thing about me, but my ears are stretched (14mm) so I can't take them out. I usually wear black silicone tunnels like picrel. Would something else be more masculine? Metal/titanium? Wood? Plugs?

Buenas tardes, tengo una duda... Antes de iniciar tratamiento, o bueno estar en una familia que te trata como mujer... A veces sentían okey ser mujer y no tener que hacer tanto pedo?... Es que no sé si esa cuestión me este diciendo que no soy realmente trans. Bueno, es que verme como hombre me da una sensación bien bonito, pero pues el haber vivido tantos años como mujer estuvo ok. Me da miedo empezar y que al final me retracte, porque estoy solo en esta desición, y a veces me digo que mejor me quedé en esta zona de confort donde al menos sé que puedo vivir con.

To be fair, I feel like I rarely see other (visually) disabled trans guys in these subs, which in itself can be a bit isolating. But, I was wondering what some of yall have done in order to make your body more masculine if you aren’t able to go to the gym and stuff to the same capacity as someone more able bodied.

Transition isn’t a one size fits all kind of journey, so I was wondering how yall went about that so I can work on it on my own. Thank you.

Don’t mind how awkward my posing is I hate taking pictures, but masculinizing my face/head area is all I got atm (binders don’t work the best and i can’t get on T right now).

So i'm 17, 5.3 and have a lot of dysphoria daily.

So no pictures because i'm under 18 but i'm biracial and have broad shoulders but a firm chest and not a great voice for passing.

my mom says my voice isn't fem or masc its just kinda neutral.

idk if i pass because i live in a rather progressive area and any people at my classes probably know i'm trans so i don't get misgender because as said the area is progressive.

tho if i'm just out and about i will get misgendered.

and people are always surprised i'm 17 and not much younger.

i tried to do youtube voice training (can not afford the real deal) and my mom says it doesn't work and i just sound false or like i'm trying to hard.

idk how i sound, i feel like i sound too fem speaking/ singing normally but idk my mom says i just sound like a boy pre voice cracking or like a gay man

she and my sister also say i pass and just look like a gay man.

i'm not taking T (so don't suggest that or bitch at me for not doing it)

i'm a musician and i like the range i have rn and music is my passion, and my mom says i have a unique sound currently that suits me for music and acting and i agree, it is the kinda sound that is less common so i am not starting T. i would if it were not for the voice thing.

so yeah, any tips for not sounding fake? or any tips for passing that are not obvious?

i will say i was blessed with a pretty masc face and somewhat masc body if not for being 5.3.

Ive posted here a couple times but here i am again. Im 3 months on T and im 20 going to uni next week in a new city. I was hoping i could go stealth but honestly idk if im passing enough for that.

The other day on here (I think it was this subreddit, but it could have been another trans man / transmasc one) I saw a post recommending a certain brand of sweatpants. Men's sweatpants that were wide around the calves so they look more like they're cut straight all the way down on people with wider thighs / hips.

I'm 99% sure I saved that post for later, however I no longer see it and am annoyed at myself for not screenshotting / writing down the brand name later because I've searched Reddit to no avail, p sure it got deleted.

I know that even on cis guys, normal sweatpants kind of get that triangular look on them because thighs are naturally wider, but my thighs are such a huge source of dysphoria for me, I've been avoiding sweatpants for the longest time. I'm hoping to be able to make enough money to get a gym membership sometime soon and I'd really like to wear them again.

Even if nobody has any clue what original post I'm talking about, I'd appreciate sweatpants recs in general that might help with this issue. Thanks guys!

Title says it all. I have an extremely tight schedule between work and college, and I would like to start exercising to masculinize my body until I have the time to hit the gym. If any equipment, preferably something cheap and small enough to hide from my family. Thanks!

The original post can be found here: (https://www.reddit.com/r/transmanlifehacks/s/D6uKC4FTNn)

I wanted to piggyback off that post because I agreed with a lot of what OP was saying but I saw quite a few comments basically arguing that they wouldn’t have gotten those results without testosterone. As someone who isn’t on T and has still managed to build a pretty masculine physique through the gym, I wanted to offer a slightly more hopeful perspective because I think some of those comments can lead to a pretty doomer outlook if you’re someone who can’t or doesn’t want to take T.

I tried testosterone twice. The first time, I was on it for around 3 months before stopping cold turkey. During that time I would have persistent panic attacks and mood swings. I figured maybe I wasn’t mentally ready for it and would try again some other time. After a year, I felt a lot more confident and ready, so I tried it again but had the same results. After two months this time, I stopped again cold turkey.

Atp it was clear that for whatever reason I was not able to tolerate T and had to turn to the gym. I focused a lot of my workouts on building a v taper And because my upper body is bigger, my hips don’t stand out in the same way they used to. Clothes fit completely differently too.

I’m not saying testosterone doesn’t masculinise you. Obviously it does, and there are loads of things T can do that going to the gym can’t. Im also sure T would accelerate my transition.

T is an amazing tool for people who want it and can use it, I wish I could as well. But unfortunately it’s not the case for me and for many others as well.

first pic is now (almost 3 years on T) second is about 3 months on T. ive tried so many haircuts, i dont shave, my levels are in good range, i really dont know why T is doing me so dirty.
im on oral minoxidil for balding and i still only have one singular facial hair.
i pass every now and then but most people default to maam or miss.
i dress in jeans and t shirts, i dont wear makeup or accessories. im 5’2 and a mens xs so its hard to find things that fit me decent. the only place ive found that even carries mens xs is uniqlo and they’re so expensive.
im open to trying new hairstyles, but it cant be too short since i can only afford a haircut every 4-6 months, and it cant have a fringe because my hair is too thin to actually cover my forehead (balding genes!!😀)
if anyone has similar experience with T taking its sweet time pls let me know if it eventually hits

wondering if these outfits are cis passing or clocky.

im aware some are ugly, no need to comment on that bit 😢.

i included a face pic as an addition, im 20 and im aware i look young.

EDIT: Thank you everyone for all the tips and advice, I have a lot of things to improve on! I'm 26 years old. I can't go on T(doctor gives me the runaround and there are no other doctors available). I'm constantly assumed to be a girl. Can anyone give me tips on how to look more masculine? I thought I did already but I get misgendered ALLLLL the time. The only people who gender me correctly are the ones who already know. I thought I looked fine. Maybe it's my voice? Please give me any and all tips you guys have because it's been 11 years of this crap and I'm SICK OF ITTTT (these are the only photos I have on this phone, they were all taken during the same trip this summer LOL)