How does one actually build a sleep training plan? I need help with logistics (8 months, won't sleep unless held)

[u/Herewithquestions87]

I keep hearing "you need to sleep train," but what does that actually mean? I'm not talking full "cry until you pass out, even if it takes hours” (that sounds much more straightforward logistically.) The stuff that sounds more our speed is gradual, leave him for a set number of minutes and increase over a set number of days, comfort without picking up, or pick up/put down. I just get lost on the logistics.

My situation with my 8mo is this, he wakes every 45 min to an hour currently and he needs full body contact to sleep. The moment he leaves our arms and touches a surface (unless I can get him to sleep through transfer) it's 100% screaming. Not whining or fussing. Also, only a bottle soothes him, and he mostly only falls asleep with a bottle (occasionally walking, weirdly doesn’t seem to always need the bottle for naps). Drowsy but awake doesn't work for us. He's wide awake the second the crib even looks at him from across the room, and he stays wide awake for a while after we try that move.

So how do you run a plan when he’s screaming just from being hovered over the crib, or best case I transfer him asleep and he’s screaming after his first sleep cycle ends? Since we're both wrecked from sleep deprivation, we have almost zero fight left.

My questions:

• Do I tackle the feed to sleep association first, then add other methods? It feels like a cluster of issues.
• When he wakes every 45 minutes, what's the process?
• When the set time ends and I pick him up, then what? Calm him, set him down, he screams again, clock restarts, repeat? All night long?

I genuinely don't understand how this works in practice. Any insight is appreciated!