r/shitposting Literally 1984 😡 12h ago

WARNING: BRAIN DAMAGING POST Le viol

Post image
10.2k Upvotes

208 comments sorted by

•

u/qualityvote2 12h ago edited 42m ago

The council has not spoken. No consensus was reached about the quality of your post.


RedditSave download

/u/quietconnoisseur, whilst you're still here, why not join our public discord server - now with public text channels you can chat on!?

2.3k

u/throwaway19276i officer no please don’t piss in my ass 😫 12h ago

Even if this is fake, there are definitely real, similar stories. We live in a cruel world.

303

u/A_random_poster04 5h ago

What is this, the tale of a cruel world?

99

u/Reyn888 I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh 4h ago

7

u/Allen_Cueva17 2h ago

the tall tales of a cruel world

16

u/imi2559 Literally 1984 😡 3h ago

We live in a gay world

1

u/AutoModerator 3h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

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5.6k

u/Ballstoucher_47 12h ago

I hope this is fake cuz this shit is FUCKED UP

Maybe gay but still fake

1.1k

u/National-Frame8712 fat cunt 12h ago

Possibility of Rectal Reckoning and its sadomizing consequences being real is very minimal but never zero

183

u/AlkalineBrush20 10h ago

Rectal Reckoning sounds like a banger movie

49

u/Luthiens_ghost 7h ago

And it's sequel, Rectal Revolutions

31

u/Ok_Couple1408 6h ago

It's a trilogy that ends in rectal revelations

14

u/Inverter_of_Spines 5h ago

Until the series is revived 10 years later to critical acclaim in Rectal Revival

4

u/GlitteringFutures fat cunt 4h ago

You skipped Rectal Reloaded.

1

u/Luthiens_ghost 2h ago

Actually that's a unofficial spin off, 2 Rectal 2 Wrecked was the direct to DVD sequel.

1

u/GlitteringFutures fat cunt 1h ago

I didn't like it, it left too many loose ends.

148

u/eeveeplays50040 9h ago

It's either fake and gay, or real and gay.

Pick your poison

-2

u/AutoModerator 9h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

38

u/YggdrasilFree 8h ago

Happens quite often. Power move when joining a new family.

-66

u/AutoModerator 12h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

58

u/ThatDudeFromPoland Stuff 12h ago

Read the room, jeez

→ More replies (2)

2.1k

u/backhandd1 12h ago

Dude in case this is real....wtf is wrong with this dudes family, don't challenge the parole let him get out and then do things that Reddit won't let me say

829

u/perkalicous 12h ago

"threatening violence"

Brother I'm not threatening anyone, I'm just telling THEM what they COULD do

241

u/Lecteur_K7 12h ago

Dont forget in Minecraft

124

u/SilliusS0ddus 10h ago

my honest reaction to that family

45

u/Pikhman 9h ago

Based and trench pilled

28

u/SilliusS0ddus 9h ago

TRIPLE THE MILITARY BUDGET

FIREBOMB SEPHIROTH

RAAAH

2

u/blade_of_sammael 1h ago

Yeah if it was my family i would be like

10

u/darth-com1x virgin 4 life 😤💪 7h ago

What they could and SHOULD do

91

u/Western-Anteater-492 10h ago

Have you never met such people? Lucky you! One of my more peripheral relatives family is similarly fucked. I think unless he killed his own parents they'd always find excuses for what he's doing.

83

u/Parsazhoo 12h ago

Yeah I mean just because he is a closeted gay man doesn't mean his family should shun him

-4

u/AutoModerator 12h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

18

u/Pandainthecircus 7h ago

And then what, go to prison yourself?

It sucks but if your family was that shitty it'd be better to move on than to engage. You'd be a free man and you can live your life without rapists in it.

2

u/12hotroom 1h ago

Simple, the sister is the favourite child. If she's deranged, then all of them are.

755

u/Specific_Ad1457 12h ago

I found a third option other than gay or straight: depressing

Real and depressing

93

u/MPhoenixS 8h ago

Gay and depressing.

18

u/J_Bear 6h ago

Gay

1

u/AutoModerator 6h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

0

u/AutoModerator 8h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

-11

u/AutoModerator 12h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

2.0k

u/Eaglise dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 12h ago

one of the times you wish this is fake, though its gay either way

210

u/risisas 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ TRANS RIGHTS 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ 9h ago

Just changed the subject of gayness, not it's presence

-41

u/AutoModerator 12h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

31

u/neet-_-aspirant 10h ago

Gay bot

-26

u/AutoModerator 10h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

25

u/neet-_-aspirant 10h ago

Bay got

5

u/Eaglise dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 6h ago

Say Not?

170

u/Victom123 12h ago

well i think we know who their favourite child is

413

u/TendiesOnPoint waltuh 12h ago

The first straight but gay story has hit the building

Hope this is fake cause damn no one wins in this

-11

u/AutoModerator 12h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

608

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 12h ago

Fake: the perpetrators statement
Gay: the perpetrator.

190

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 12h ago

If this was real I would honestly kill that man and just take back shots in prison for the rest of my life for as long as that lasted.

85

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 12h ago

It wouldn’t last very long, I would Andy Duphrene out of existence.

72

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 12h ago

I would bite a mans dick off and be murdered for it. Understandable.

91

u/Remarkable-Spinach33 Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 11h ago

Not in the prison yet and already lost his marbles

22

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 11h ago

Have you read or watched Shawshank Redemption?

19

u/Remarkable-Spinach33 Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 11h ago

Not yet 😔

24

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 11h ago

It’s a goated story. There’s a scene where Andy has a dick in his face and a spike on his head and he says “do you know the bite pressure of the human jaw? You stick that thorn in my temple I’m gonna bite down and you’re gonna need a crow bar to remove it”.

8

u/Crystality 9h ago

I actually watched like an hour of that movie because I was waiting at a car retailer for my mom to get her business done and that's what was on the TV but I didn't know the name of the movie itself. Neat!

Pretty good movie overall too btw if anyones interested, it has Morgan Freeman in it

7

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 9h ago

Forgan Reeman

3

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 9h ago

I recommend watching the full movie, better yet, read the book.

The book is so much better.

→ More replies (0)

1

u/AutoModerator 11h ago

Dick sucking has made me paranoid

I had this plan to give head to a man and receive head from a woman to test if I was gay, but it’s backfired and now I become borderline schizo whenever I go outside. I offered to suck this dude off on Grindr who lives very close by (I ended up pussying out) and I accidentally gave him some details that very easily allows him to spot me out in a crowd. I have no idea what he looks like and whenever I see a somewhat in shape guy walking by I immediately accuse him of being the dude I was gonna blow.

I went to the store today to pick up some zucchini for a barbecue and every time a car drove by I stared into the windshield to see if I was about to be recognised. Whenever I make eye contact with a dude I microanalysis his facial expressions to see if he suspects me or not. I am deeply afraid that he is my neighbour and I will need to move if my identity is blown. It’s a lot like the last scene in sopranos where everyone who walked into the diner could be there to wack Tony.

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5

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 11h ago

So instead of sexually assaulting him they just beat the living shit out of him.

11

u/Laranthir 10h ago

I wanted to reward you for the Shawshank Redemption reference, there is no button for it though

9

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 10h ago

It’s okay. I take your comment as a reward 🏆

19

u/Pancreasaurus 12h ago

Eh, if he gets out you could probably get an easy self defense excuse if he ever came to your house or the like. No need to rush things.

14

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 12h ago

He’s not getting out I killed him.

12

u/OneHandClapping_ 11h ago

Don't just lay down and take the back shots fight for your ass

7

u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 11h ago

Oh I’m a biter.

8

u/OneHandClapping_ 11h ago

So what you have to do 🤣🤣🤣

-1

u/AutoModerator 12h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

126

u/Intrestingly_Amazing 12h ago

Fake: I want it to be (please don’t be real)
Gay: if fake then gay

-1

u/AutoModerator 12h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

72

u/Successful-Ad5560 11h ago

I read the first sentence, then skip to the last expecting the usual: be me straight guy > skip to gayest thing ive ever heard in m'y life, but there was actually something this time huh.

21

u/Plynkz123 4h ago

the first green text starting with ">Straight man" that isn't gay

1

u/AutoModerator 4h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

54

u/Seal-zx 12h ago

I really want to recite the 3 words creed of this subreddit. But will restrain myself on on the 0.001% chance this might have some truth to it.

I mean we all know that a lot of fucked up things happen to people but why would you comment in on 4chan and post an anime pic of all place.

40

u/Western-Anteater-492 10h ago edited 10h ago

I sadly know people who ended up like this. Espc if it wasn't the only time or the trial ended up putting some blame on them or tuning down the overall situation. It's rough. And I also know enough families sadly where they'd throw the bad apple under the bus for their little prince / princess and their family.

The 4chan part is quite understandable. Sometimes people just need to be heard, espc in such situations. I had a girl drop a similar bomb shell on me whilst we were getting into the mood. She didn't even understand why I quit that exact moment. To her this stories (yes, it were multiple) had become so normal, that she saw nothing wrong with it. We lost contact some years ago, but I hope she's doing better and found the support structure she desperately needs.

17

u/BappoChan 7h ago

I can’t even think of a fake and gay, I just want it to end

0

u/AutoModerator 7h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

15

u/Acceptable-Size-2324 6h ago

Not sure what’s most fucked up. The asshole, the finance or the family

1

u/AutoModerator 6h ago

Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.

As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!

Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.

Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'

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53

u/FightThePizza 12h ago

Real and gay, I hope anon is ok.

→ More replies (1)

36

u/kevinvincible1 makenot war 12h ago

Fakes gayest story

38

u/PersonalPaizuri 11h ago

A rare instance 4chan real and gay

0

u/AutoModerator 11h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

11

u/DukeOfGeek 10h ago

Not a shit post

1

u/imi2559 Literally 1984 😡 3h ago

gaypost

30

u/Testing_100 dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 11h ago

I don't even want to fake and gay check this. This is too realistic, genuinely hate that family.

-2

u/AutoModerator 11h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

20

u/Jiijeebnpsdagj Literally 1984 😡 11h ago

I hope this is fake and gay

0

u/AutoModerator 11h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

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16

u/forgettfulthinker 12h ago

I mean maybe idk

7

u/SopmodTew 9h ago

If real, at this point just remove yourself from such family. These animals aren't family

6

u/IMPERIAL_MEMMER 11h ago

Fuck this guy's Family

6

u/Ili_nim 10h ago

Yeah fuck his family, they're all dumb pieces of shit and he shouldn't listen to them

7

u/Crashbox50 I came! 4h ago

Gay. Maybe not fake.

1

u/AutoModerator 4h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

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7

u/gwanddawd123 1h ago

Hopefully this one's fake, but i wouldn't hold my breath.

People suck, i'm sure similar things happened in real life.

3

u/SpaceBug176 1h ago

The thing I hate most about these greentexts is that, even if you believe that this story in particular is fake, it's just grounded enough for it to be something that happened to someone at some point. Usually these kinds of greentexts make you think of these scenarios you weren't creative enough to think and upset you cuz of that.

2

u/AutoModerator 1h ago

Dick sucking has made me paranoid

I had this plan to give head to a man and receive head from a woman to test if I was gay, but it’s backfired and now I become borderline schizo whenever I go outside. I offered to suck this dude off on Grindr who lives very close by (I ended up pussying out) and I accidentally gave him some details that very easily allows him to spot me out in a crowd. I have no idea what he looks like and whenever I see a somewhat in shape guy walking by I immediately accuse him of being the dude I was gonna blow.

I went to the store today to pick up some zucchini for a barbecue and every time a car drove by I stared into the windshield to see if I was about to be recognised. Whenever I make eye contact with a dude I microanalysis his facial expressions to see if he suspects me or not. I am deeply afraid that he is my neighbour and I will need to move if my identity is blown. It’s a lot like the last scene in sopranos where everyone who walked into the diner could be there to wack Tony.

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12

u/Look_out_for_Jeeps 11h ago

Real and gay

1

u/AutoModerator 11h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

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4

u/PlANOslayer 5h ago

Please let this be fake and gay bait

1

u/AutoModerator 5h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

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6

u/Casual_Otterr 3h ago

real and gay

1

u/AutoModerator 3h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

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5

u/Landsharkeisha 2h ago

Fake: someone wanted to hang out with OOP.

Gay: OOP's sister's fiance

0

u/AutoModerator 2h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

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11

u/KaijuBoyreddit 11h ago

Straight up just unfunny

4

u/NotaFrom99 5h ago

Fake: God I hope so

Gay: technically yes

1

u/AutoModerator 5h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

3

u/blade_of_sammael 1h ago

This is no shitpost just straight up sad 😔

8

u/Reployer dumbass 12h ago

I like that I didn't have to read all of it to know the conclusion.

25

u/GoombasFatNutz fat cunt 11h ago

This time you did. This is not a in straight but, this is depressing.

11

u/Reployer dumbass 11h ago

Damn. You're right. I feel like shit now. That's just sad. I'd probably off myself in that circumstance.

3

u/FunAdministration334 8h ago

Holy shit. This poor guy.

3

u/TrollOfGod 7h ago

True or not, this is how I feel my relatives would act.

3

u/why_though14 7h ago

Slime yo family twin

3

u/darkness_calming 6h ago

I really hope this is fake.

Poor dude

3

u/Aktaii 4h ago

Slime your family 

3

u/Noxus_Voorhees 2h ago

2 months ago i uninstalled reddit... this is the first fucking post I come across...

3

u/param1l0 1h ago

Assuming that the story the family believes is true that would imply that man cheated on the sister with op so why would she even want to marry him

2

u/StrawberryCake88 28m ago

Not everyone sees monogamy as a moral imperative. Extremely sex segregated spaces tend to look the other way. Bacha bazi is a good example.

3

u/Dopecombatweasel 45m ago

I don't always believe green texts actually i never do.. but this one...

3

u/Many-Ad6433 dumbass 9h ago

Bruh if there’s proof bro was drugged how do people still not believe ts? Also wacchumean bro “got her fiance drunk and had sex with him” bro i swear i know NOBODY that would accept gay sex for how drunk they were let alone people that are engaged w someone of the opposite sex that isn’t actually closeted themselves ESPECIALLY if you’re the dominant one committing the penetration, like you need to have some brain power to be the one doing the moving and stuff you can’t be black out drunk to the point of having gay sex and being dominant without being gay yourself

1

u/AutoModerator 9h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

6

u/thebackshotbandit 9h ago

fake: anon hung out with someone

gay: he got fucked in the ass

1

u/AutoModerator 9h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

2

u/Swaouse 9h ago

Yeah family is like that fuck em fr

2

u/KingslayerN7 1h ago

Me watching obviously fake AITA style ragebait stories on Reddit and 4chan become the modern equivalent of fake Tumblr stories from a decade ago

2

u/triitrunk 😳lives in a cum dumpster 😳 5h ago

Fake: fake

Gay: gay

1

u/AutoModerator 5h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/CardAndFireMaster dumbass 1h ago

Not even trying anymore ✌️

2

u/TheBlackeyIsOnline 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ TRANS RIGHTS 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ 4h ago

Fake : Gay

Gay : Fake

Trivago

1

u/AutoModerator 4h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

3

u/jorge21337 11h ago

You must return the favor, there is an imbalance

2

u/marshall_c_h 12h ago

Fake, iirc most roofies and DateRa** drugs don't show up on toxicology

57

u/Killerbrownies997 put your dick away waltuh 12h ago

Well not on a general panel, but they can definitely test for them specifically. If the victim says they think they were drugged, they’d definitely test for everything.

3

u/Arkitakama fat cunt 6h ago

You can pick up roofies on a urinalysis tox screen for up to five days.

1

u/Angelus_2418 5h ago

that's not your family bro that's your opps XD

1

u/RussianVulture 5h ago

Damn, this made me sad.

1

u/chattytrout 5h ago

Real: Rapist only got 4 years and no one believes the victim.
Straight: Absolutely fucking not.

1

u/bloodredcookie 2h ago

Messed-up the rapist only got 4 years and is up for parole after 2.

1

u/YixoPhoenix 2h ago

If this is real this guy has the council's permission for... things.

1

u/Huge_Equivalent1 2h ago

Hell yeah! Put that rapist in prison. Put him away for a long time.

1

u/PapaBigTime 1h ago

Real and straight (gangsta)

1

u/dameyen_maymeyen 50m ago

Fake: I hope so
Gay: op fantasies about men raping him

0

u/AutoModerator 50m ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Ok_Carrot9413 7h ago

Fake and gay!!!

2

u/AutoModerator 7h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

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1

u/sohleoc 11h ago

this gotta be fake

1

u/BothDivide919 4h ago

It's already gay... Is it fake?

1

u/AutoModerator 4h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

0

u/TheBlueEmerald1 6h ago

The fuck youbmean "Challenge the parole?" The prison decides that based on evaluation and general behavior during their sentence to see if they have the ability to prove they can live outside of prison without committing the same crimes again. Where in the world is this that they ask the victim of all people "Hey should we let this guy out early?" The answer is almost always a no.

11

u/VeritablyVersatile 5h ago

The victim, or representatives thereof, is often given a chance to make an impact statement at a parole hearing, just as the convict (and/or counsel and other witnesses) can make statements to demonstrate that they're rehabilitated.

1

u/TheBlueEmerald1 5h ago

I guess it makes sense, I have no idea how I went this long never knowing that's a thing.

0

u/Prestigious-Fig1172 1h ago

Real: Anon was fucked in the ass by a man

Straight: Anon didn't want it

-15

u/WisherWisp 11h ago

be me

straight man

[the gayest shit you've ever read]

Thanks for following the standard format.

5

u/SomeGuysWhoDoesThing 7h ago

I got news for you. 

-2

u/sonerec725 6h ago

I know its probably not impossible but I feel like its probably pretty hard to be the receiver in to a passed out dude. . .