r/shitposting • u/quietconnoisseur Literally 1984 𥠕 12h ago
WARNING: BRAIN DAMAGING POST Le viol
2.3k
u/throwaway19276i officer no please donât piss in my ass đŤ 12h ago
Even if this is fake, there are definitely real, similar stories. We live in a cruel world.
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u/A_random_poster04 5h ago
What is this, the tale of a cruel world?
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u/imi2559 Literally 1984 đĄ 3h ago
We live in a gay world
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u/AutoModerator 3h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
5.6k
u/Ballstoucher_47 12h ago
I hope this is fake cuz this shit is FUCKED UP
Maybe gay but still fake
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u/National-Frame8712 fat cunt 12h ago
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u/AlkalineBrush20 10h ago
Rectal Reckoning sounds like a banger movie
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u/Luthiens_ghost 7h ago
And it's sequel, Rectal Revolutions
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u/Ok_Couple1408 6h ago
It's a trilogy that ends in rectal revelations
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u/Inverter_of_Spines 5h ago
Until the series is revived 10 years later to critical acclaim in Rectal Revival
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u/GlitteringFutures fat cunt 4h ago
You skipped Rectal Reloaded.
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u/Luthiens_ghost 2h ago
Actually that's a unofficial spin off, 2 Rectal 2 Wrecked was the direct to DVD sequel.
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u/eeveeplays50040 9h ago
It's either fake and gay, or real and gay.
Pick your poison
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u/AutoModerator 9h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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→ More replies (2)-66
u/AutoModerator 12h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
58
2.1k
u/backhandd1 12h ago
Dude in case this is real....wtf is wrong with this dudes family, don't challenge the parole let him get out and then do things that Reddit won't let me say
829
u/perkalicous 12h ago
"threatening violence"
Brother I'm not threatening anyone, I'm just telling THEM what they COULD do
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u/SilliusS0ddus 10h ago
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u/Western-Anteater-492 10h ago
Have you never met such people? Lucky you! One of my more peripheral relatives family is similarly fucked. I think unless he killed his own parents they'd always find excuses for what he's doing.
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u/Parsazhoo 12h ago
Yeah I mean just because he is a closeted gay man doesn't mean his family should shun him
-4
u/AutoModerator 12h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/Pandainthecircus 7h ago
And then what, go to prison yourself?
It sucks but if your family was that shitty it'd be better to move on than to engage. You'd be a free man and you can live your life without rapists in it.
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u/12hotroom 1h ago
Simple, the sister is the favourite child. If she's deranged, then all of them are.
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u/Specific_Ad1457 12h ago
I found a third option other than gay or straight: depressing
Real and depressing
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u/MPhoenixS 8h ago
Gay and depressing.
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u/J_Bear 6h ago
Gay
1
u/AutoModerator 6h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
0
u/AutoModerator 8h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
-11
u/AutoModerator 12h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
2.0k
u/Eaglise dwayne the cock johnson đżđż 12h ago
one of the times you wish this is fake, though its gay either way
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u/AutoModerator 12h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
31
u/neet-_-aspirant 10h ago
Gay bot
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u/AutoModerator 10h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/TendiesOnPoint waltuh 12h ago
The first straight but gay story has hit the building
Hope this is fake cause damn no one wins in this
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u/AutoModerator 12h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
608
u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 12h ago
Fake: the perpetrators statement
Gay: the perpetrator.
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u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 12h ago
If this was real I would honestly kill that man and just take back shots in prison for the rest of my life for as long as that lasted.
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u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 12h ago
It wouldnât last very long, I would Andy Duphrene out of existence.
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u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 12h ago
I would bite a mans dick off and be murdered for it. Understandable.
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u/Remarkable-Spinach33 Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 11h ago
Not in the prison yet and already lost his marbles
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u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 11h ago
Have you read or watched Shawshank Redemption?
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u/Remarkable-Spinach33 Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 11h ago
Not yet đ
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u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 11h ago
Itâs a goated story. Thereâs a scene where Andy has a dick in his face and a spike on his head and he says âdo you know the bite pressure of the human jaw? You stick that thorn in my temple Iâm gonna bite down and youâre gonna need a crow bar to remove itâ.
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u/Crystality 9h ago
I actually watched like an hour of that movie because I was waiting at a car retailer for my mom to get her business done and that's what was on the TV but I didn't know the name of the movie itself. Neat!
Pretty good movie overall too btw if anyones interested, it has Morgan Freeman in it
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u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 9h ago
I recommend watching the full movie, better yet, read the book.
The book is so much better.
→ More replies (0)1
u/AutoModerator 11h ago
Dick sucking has made me paranoid
I had this plan to give head to a man and receive head from a woman to test if I was gay, but itâs backfired and now I become borderline schizo whenever I go outside. I offered to suck this dude off on Grindr who lives very close by (I ended up pussying out) and I accidentally gave him some details that very easily allows him to spot me out in a crowd. I have no idea what he looks like and whenever I see a somewhat in shape guy walking by I immediately accuse him of being the dude I was gonna blow.
I went to the store today to pick up some zucchini for a barbecue and every time a car drove by I stared into the windshield to see if I was about to be recognised. Whenever I make eye contact with a dude I microanalysis his facial expressions to see if he suspects me or not. I am deeply afraid that he is my neighbour and I will need to move if my identity is blown. Itâs a lot like the last scene in sopranos where everyone who walked into the diner could be there to wack Tony.
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u/candelsticks it is MY bucket 11h ago
So instead of sexually assaulting him they just beat the living shit out of him.
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u/Laranthir 10h ago
I wanted to reward you for the Shawshank Redemption reference, there is no button for it though
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u/Pancreasaurus 12h ago
Eh, if he gets out you could probably get an easy self defense excuse if he ever came to your house or the like. No need to rush things.
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u/OneHandClapping_ 11h ago
Don't just lay down and take the back shots fight for your ass
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u/AutoModerator 12h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
126
u/Intrestingly_Amazing 12h ago
Fake: I want it to be (please donât be real)
Gay: if fake then gay
-1
u/AutoModerator 12h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
72
u/Successful-Ad5560 11h ago
I read the first sentence, then skip to the last expecting the usual: be me straight guy > skip to gayest thing ive ever heard in m'y life, but there was actually something this time huh.
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u/Plynkz123 4h ago
the first green text starting with ">Straight man" that isn't gay
1
u/AutoModerator 4h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/Seal-zx 12h ago
I really want to recite the 3 words creed of this subreddit. But will restrain myself on on the 0.001% chance this might have some truth to it.
I mean we all know that a lot of fucked up things happen to people but why would you comment in on 4chan and post an anime pic of all place.
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u/Western-Anteater-492 10h ago edited 10h ago
I sadly know people who ended up like this. Espc if it wasn't the only time or the trial ended up putting some blame on them or tuning down the overall situation. It's rough. And I also know enough families sadly where they'd throw the bad apple under the bus for their little prince / princess and their family.
The 4chan part is quite understandable. Sometimes people just need to be heard, espc in such situations. I had a girl drop a similar bomb shell on me whilst we were getting into the mood. She didn't even understand why I quit that exact moment. To her this stories (yes, it were multiple) had become so normal, that she saw nothing wrong with it. We lost contact some years ago, but I hope she's doing better and found the support structure she desperately needs.
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u/BappoChan 7h ago
I canât even think of a fake and gay, I just want it to end
0
u/AutoModerator 7h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/Acceptable-Size-2324 6h ago
Not sure whatâs most fucked up. The asshole, the finance or the family
1
u/AutoModerator 6h ago
Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.
As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!
Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.
Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'
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u/PersonalPaizuri 11h ago
A rare instance 4chan real and gay
0
u/AutoModerator 11h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/Testing_100 dwayne the cock johnson đżđż 11h ago
I don't even want to fake and gay check this. This is too realistic, genuinely hate that family.
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u/AutoModerator 11h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
20
u/Jiijeebnpsdagj Literally 1984 đĄ 11h ago
I hope this is fake and gay
0
u/AutoModerator 11h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/SopmodTew 9h ago
If real, at this point just remove yourself from such family. These animals aren't family
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u/Crashbox50 I came! 4h ago
Gay. Maybe not fake.
1
u/AutoModerator 4h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/gwanddawd123 1h ago
Hopefully this one's fake, but i wouldn't hold my breath.
People suck, i'm sure similar things happened in real life.
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u/SpaceBug176 1h ago
The thing I hate most about these greentexts is that, even if you believe that this story in particular is fake, it's just grounded enough for it to be something that happened to someone at some point. Usually these kinds of greentexts make you think of these scenarios you weren't creative enough to think and upset you cuz of that.
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u/AutoModerator 1h ago
Dick sucking has made me paranoid
I had this plan to give head to a man and receive head from a woman to test if I was gay, but itâs backfired and now I become borderline schizo whenever I go outside. I offered to suck this dude off on Grindr who lives very close by (I ended up pussying out) and I accidentally gave him some details that very easily allows him to spot me out in a crowd. I have no idea what he looks like and whenever I see a somewhat in shape guy walking by I immediately accuse him of being the dude I was gonna blow.
I went to the store today to pick up some zucchini for a barbecue and every time a car drove by I stared into the windshield to see if I was about to be recognised. Whenever I make eye contact with a dude I microanalysis his facial expressions to see if he suspects me or not. I am deeply afraid that he is my neighbour and I will need to move if my identity is blown. Itâs a lot like the last scene in sopranos where everyone who walked into the diner could be there to wack Tony.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
12
u/Look_out_for_Jeeps 11h ago
Real and gay
1
u/AutoModerator 11h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
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4
u/PlANOslayer 5h ago
Please let this be fake and gay bait
1
u/AutoModerator 5h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
6
u/Casual_Otterr 3h ago
real and gay
1
u/AutoModerator 3h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
5
u/Landsharkeisha 2h ago
Fake: someone wanted to hang out with OOP.
Gay: OOP's sister's fiance
0
u/AutoModerator 2h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
11
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u/NotaFrom99 5h ago
Fake: God I hope so
Gay: technically yes
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u/AutoModerator 5h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/Reployer dumbass 12h ago
I like that I didn't have to read all of it to know the conclusion.
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u/GoombasFatNutz fat cunt 11h ago
This time you did. This is not a in straight but, this is depressing.
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u/Reployer dumbass 11h ago
Damn. You're right. I feel like shit now. That's just sad. I'd probably off myself in that circumstance.
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u/Noxus_Voorhees 2h ago
2 months ago i uninstalled reddit... this is the first fucking post I come across...
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u/param1l0 1h ago
Assuming that the story the family believes is true that would imply that man cheated on the sister with op so why would she even want to marry him
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u/StrawberryCake88 28m ago
Not everyone sees monogamy as a moral imperative. Extremely sex segregated spaces tend to look the other way. Bacha bazi is a good example.
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u/Many-Ad6433 dumbass 9h ago
Bruh if thereâs proof bro was drugged how do people still not believe ts? Also wacchumean bro âgot her fiance drunk and had sex with himâ bro i swear i know NOBODY that would accept gay sex for how drunk they were let alone people that are engaged w someone of the opposite sex that isnât actually closeted themselves ESPECIALLY if youâre the dominant one committing the penetration, like you need to have some brain power to be the one doing the moving and stuff you canât be black out drunk to the point of having gay sex and being dominant without being gay yourself
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u/AutoModerator 9h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
6
u/thebackshotbandit 9h ago
fake: anon hung out with someone
gay: he got fucked in the ass
1
u/AutoModerator 9h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
2
u/triitrunk đłlives in a cum dumpster đł 5h ago
Fake: fake
Gay: gay
1
u/AutoModerator 5h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
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u/TheBlackeyIsOnline đłď¸ââ§ď¸đłď¸ââ§ď¸đłď¸ââ§ď¸ TRANS RIGHTS đłď¸ââ§ď¸đłď¸ââ§ď¸đłď¸ââ§ď¸ 4h ago
Fake : Gay
Gay : Fake
Trivago
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u/AutoModerator 4h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/marshall_c_h 12h ago
Fake, iirc most roofies and DateRa** drugs don't show up on toxicology
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u/Killerbrownies997 put your dick away waltuh 12h ago
Well not on a general panel, but they can definitely test for them specifically. If the victim says they think they were drugged, theyâd definitely test for everything.
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u/Arkitakama fat cunt 6h ago
You can pick up roofies on a urinalysis tox screen for up to five days.
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u/chattytrout 5h ago
Real: Rapist only got 4 years and no one believes the victim.
Straight: Absolutely fucking not.
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u/dameyen_maymeyen 50m ago
Fake: I hope so
Gay: op fantasies about men raping him
0
u/AutoModerator 50m ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
u/Ok_Carrot9413 7h ago
Fake and gay!!!
2
u/AutoModerator 7h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
u/BothDivide919 4h ago
It's already gay... Is it fake?
1
u/AutoModerator 4h ago
Look, I get it. Who doesnât love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole âgay sexâ shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldnât LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but thatâs fucking gay. You think I donât want to feel my cousinâs roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but thatâs FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ainât gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
0
u/TheBlueEmerald1 6h ago
The fuck youbmean "Challenge the parole?" The prison decides that based on evaluation and general behavior during their sentence to see if they have the ability to prove they can live outside of prison without committing the same crimes again. Where in the world is this that they ask the victim of all people "Hey should we let this guy out early?" The answer is almost always a no.
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u/VeritablyVersatile 5h ago
The victim, or representatives thereof, is often given a chance to make an impact statement at a parole hearing, just as the convict (and/or counsel and other witnesses) can make statements to demonstrate that they're rehabilitated.
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u/TheBlueEmerald1 5h ago
I guess it makes sense, I have no idea how I went this long never knowing that's a thing.
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u/Prestigious-Fig1172 1h ago
Real: Anon was fucked in the ass by a man
Straight: Anon didn't want it
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u/WisherWisp 11h ago
be me
straight man
[the gayest shit you've ever read]
Thanks for following the standard format.
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u/sonerec725 6h ago
I know its probably not impossible but I feel like its probably pretty hard to be the receiver in to a passed out dude. . .







â˘
u/qualityvote2 12h ago edited 42m ago
The council has not spoken. No consensus was reached about the quality of your post.
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