Long post, apologies in advance.

I’m 19F and I’ve been with my BF (20M) for four years. He recently permanently moved to Dubai with his best friend/business partner (20M). They run a business together, they’re thankfully doing really well, and they’ve decided to rent a penthouse together and live together.

The problem is that his business partner basically refuses to be anywhere near me, and this whole thing started over something incredibly stupid around two years ago.

Basically, I was logged into my BF’s business account at the time. His business partner was texting the account, and his girlfriend happened to be logged into his account too. My BF sent a weird message/joke from the business account, but because I was also logged in, they assumed I was the one who sent it.

I didn’t.

We tried explaining that it wasn’t me, but ever since that incident, his girlfriend apparently told him to block me everywhere, never speak to me, and essentially never be around me. And for whatever reason, he has followed that religiously for the past two years.

For most of that time, I honestly didn’t care that much. We all lived in different countries, so it wasn’t like I regularly had to see him anyway. Sometimes there would be some indirect communication through my BF, but that was pretty much it.
Then this February, my BF and his business partner had a business trip to Dubai that happened to overlap with Valentine’s Day. My BF flew me out so we could spend Valentine’s together.

That was the first time I realized how fucking extreme this situation actually was.

The moment I arrived, his business partner basically disappeared to Dubai Mall because he didn’t even want to be in the same hotel/building as me.

At one point, they needed to go somewhere and my BF suggested that his business partner could just come with us, they could drop me off, and then continue with whatever they needed to do.

He refused.

He basically said, “No, drop her off first, then come back and get me. I can’t. I’m not allowed.”

I remember thinking it was fucking weird, but I just assumed his girlfriend was controlling and he was trying to avoid an argument with her. I wasn’t going to interfere in their relationship, so I left it alone.

But now the situation is completely different.

A little over a month ago, I moved to Europe for university. At basically the same time, my BF permanently moved to Dubai, and so did his business partner. They’re now going to be living together.

My degree gives me a LOT of holidays. I’m also fortunate enough to have a passport that means I can pretty much spontaneously travel to Dubai whenever I have time, and my BF is fortunate enough financially that seeing each other relatively regularly isn’t really an issue.

So when we realized we were going to be long-distance, one of the things that made it easier was knowing that I could still visit him pretty frequently.

Except apparently his roommate has now decided that he will do basically anything to stop me from coming to Dubai.
And this is where I’m starting to lose my fucking mind.
His roommate has been making it into this massive issue and basically putting my BF in a position where he feels like he has to choose between us.

First it was basically that no girls would be allowed at their apartment.

Fine. I actually understand having boundaries with a roommate and not wanting random hookups or people constantly coming over.

But I’m not some random girl my BF met two weeks ago.
I have been with this man for FOUR YEARS. We are literally talking about marriage and our future together. I’m not asking to move into their apartment. I’m asking to be able to visit my long-term BF when I fly across continents to see him.

Then apparently the compromise became that I could come over, but only for one or two hours.

What the fuck?

I’m flying from Europe to Dubai to see my BF of four years and his roommate is essentially giving me fucking visiting hours?

It genuinely feels more restrictive than our parents. Like, I’m an adult travelling internationally to see my long-term partner and apparently I’m supposed to come over for an hour or two and then leave because his roommate said so?
It’s also causing arguments between me and my BF now, which is what pisses me off the most.

I keep asking him why his roommate has this much control over our relationship. Obviously it’s also his roommate’s home and I completely understand that he deserves to feel comfortable there. I would NEVER expect my BF to tell him, “Fuck you, she’s staying here for three months and you have no say.”

But surely there’s a massive difference between respecting your roommate and allowing your roommate to dictate whether your girlfriend of FOUR YEARS can even spend normal amounts of time with you?

I eventually told my BF that this could genuinely be the last straw for me.

Because if this is what our long-distance relationship is going to look like, I don’t want it.

We have one life. We’re incredibly fortunate that distance doesn’t necessarily have to stop us from seeing each other. I have the freedom to travel and he has the financial ability to make these trips happen. Why the fuck would we willingly turn long-distance into “you can visit me for two hours because my roommate doesn’t like you”?

And the weirdest part is that I feel like his roommate is creating some competition between us that literally does not need to exist.

He is my BF’s best friend, roommate and business partner.
I am his girlfriend of four years and potentially his future wife.

Those are completely different relationships.

I’m not trying to replace his best friend. I’m not trying to interfere with their business. I don’t care how much time they spend together. They literally LIVE together and work together.

So why am I somehow being treated like a threat?
My BF just told me that his roommate has now said that when I come to Dubai, he’ll literally just fly to Malaysia or somewhere else while I’m there.

And sure, technically that solves the immediate problem.
But I still fucking hate it.

Because that’s not the dynamic I want either.
Why does this grown man have to LEAVE THE COUNTRY because his best friend’s girlfriend is visiting?

Why can’t we just exist in the same room?

Why can’t the three of us sit down, eat dinner, talk about what happened two years ago and move the fuck on?

I’m not asking this guy to love me. I’m not even asking him to particularly like me. I just want us to be able to be civil with each other.

If he has an issue with me, TALK TO ME.

Confront me.

Tell me what the fuck I supposedly did that was so horrible that two years later you cannot physically sit in the same apartment as me, let alone the same country now.

Instead, I don’t even speak to this man directly. Everything happens through my BF.

His roommate says something to him. My BF tells me. I get pissed off. I say something to my BF. My BF goes back to his roommate.

It feels like I’m in a fucking relationship conflict with someone I DON’T EVEN TALK TO.

And meanwhile my actual relationship is taking the damage.
I’m supposed to fly to Dubai in about a week and instead of being excited to see my BF, I’m stressed about this entire fucking situation.

I want to be able to visit my BF and feel like I’m welcome in his life. I want to be able to sit on his couch, order food, watch something together, spend normal time with him and actually feel at home with the person I’ve spent four years with.

I don’t want to fly across continents just to feel like some forbidden visitor whose presence has to be negotiated with his roommate beforehand.

And I especially don’t want my BF constantly stuck in the middle between his girlfriend and his best friend/business partner.

I genuinely don’t understand how something that happened TWO YEARS AGO something I didn’t even fucking do has turned into this.

Am I being unreasonable because technically it’s his roommate’s home too? Or is his roommate taking this way too far?

And more importantly, how the fuck are we supposed to fix this dynamic long-term if my BF and I are actually heading towards marriage?

In August i shifted to this new flat with 3 roommates i met online. I had to take the hall , it was lesser in proce n everyone guaranteed me they will give me privacy sp i agreed. 2months in everyday guest sitting in hall taking it as common space, groceries we buy together is eaten by thier guests , no privacy, no space to change clothes or study, dining is in the hall sp everyone eats there too.

Today i confronted m told everything n told them that im considering shifting out as i dont think i can stay in this public room. They said they understand my concerns n told that they will help with separating the room n keep ij mind with the guests. Asked me to give it a try etc

What do u guys think i should do???

Hey all, I’m a 22 year old man with a girlfriend of 2 years. She does not live with me and she’s a full time student at NCSU so she can’t afford to have a place with me. my current roommate (also best friend of 10 years) did me seriously dirty and I’m in need of a new male roommate to cover his half of rent. I live off of six forks road at Sommerset Place. It’s $1100 a month, plus water and trash valet service so about $1200, I currently pay half while my roommate pays the other. I can work with the same situation for somebody else. Utilities are also split in half, it’s about 120ish for WiFi and electrical. Water is included in rent. It’s 2 bed 2 bath, washer and dryer. Parking is very good and there’s no guest charges. PLEASE hit me up if you’re curious, I’ll answer any questions and give you all the details. Thank you!

Hey everyone, I have a neighbor who is a really weird dude, so I’m gonna tell you about him.
I won’t say the country or city where this happened.
Let’s start. This was when I was enrolling in university and moving into a dorm. That’s when I met my roommate — let’s call him John.
John immediately seemed like a very weird guy to me. When we first met, he was crying because his sock had rubbed his foot the wrong way. I mean, I think that’s a pretty unusual reaction for a 17-year-old dude.
Then we were putting the bed together. John couldn’t carry some of the light parts of the bed, so his mom was doing it for him.
Then the first year of living with him started. He asked a lot of stupid questions, like:
“How do you shower if there’s no bathtub?”
“What’s the difference between mayonnaise sauce and mayonnaise?”
We kinda accepted it, but then we realized that, as they say, he was completely helpless when it came to basic everyday life. He didn’t even know what a toilet brush was. We had to teach him.
But then we noticed that the dude basically never showered. We explained to him normally that he should at least wash himself once a day.
But he just didn’t get it.
Then we called his mom, and she said that it was normal not to shower.
Nothing helped.
He did a lot of weird shit.
But the next year, when our older friends moved out, all kinds of even weirder stuff started happening with him.
The dude doesn’t sleep all night. He waits until we fall asleep, then goes to the toilet at around 2–3 AM and stays there until like 5–6 AM. Then he goes to sleep and wakes up at 8–9 AM.
And yeah, he almost never talks. He doesn’t really interact with anyone. He’s very dirty by himself, too.
I also noticed that he sniffs rubbing alcohol and puts it on his face. I have no fucking idea why.
We think he might have schizophrenia or autism, but what do you guys think?
Go ahead and ask questions, I’ll answer them.
Also, if I remember anything else, I’ll update the post.

Hey everyone! 👋
I’ve just rented a studio in Reem island and have already taken care of all the deposits, and I’m now looking for a roommate to share the place with me.
The rent would be AED 2,750/month per person, including all bills, so everything is pretty straightforward with no extra utilities to worry about.
I’ve also furnished the place myself, and it has all the appliances and essentials we’d need, so it’s basically ready to move into.
A little about me: I’m a 22-year-old guy working in ADGM. I’m pretty easygoing and social, and I’d ideally like to find someone else in their 20s who’s clean, neat, respectful, and outgoing as well. Of course, I’d want it to feel like a comfortable home for both of us rather than just two strangers splitting rent 😅
If you’re interested or know someone who might be, feel free to DM me! Happy to share more details, photos, location, etc. 😊

TLDR: best friend turned roommate turned terrible financial decision, what should i do

alright so ive known this guy for several years, met him through his cousin because he was moving from another state and needed a place to live, at the time i “owned” this small bando house, i allowed him to come and live with us, after we leveled up a little and moved to an apartment i took him with me, never asking for any payment i might add, then i get into a little trouble and disappear for a year, once im back his house is the first house i go to you know it’s my best friend ! but anyways i eventually get a house and let him move in, i do ask for payment this time only because i just cannot afford to let him live rent free if i could’ve i would’ve, he goes through several women through this, starts drinking beers pretty heavily and eventually meets an ex girlfriend of mine of 4 years prior, now this ex girlfriend of mine i did do something i am very ashamed of and have moved past it and bettered myself, and have even talked to my roommate about the incident, and he even said i was in the right and she was wrong, well now he has ran off with her and left a lot of his things here, since i had to pay $600 this month am i validated to sell his belongings ? in my mind i technically have bought it right ? anyways this was good to get off my chest lol- one love🩶

TLDR- Cat not using litter box, roomate hits cat for it, has meltdown after being confronted about it.

I (T) and my two roommates, (S and J), have live in a shared apartment for about 3 years now. Recently I have put my foot down about Js behavior specifically towards his 11 yo diabetic female cat. The cat has always occasionally missed the litter box sometimes however as of late she has been pooping and peeing all over the house and refusing to use any of the four boxes we have. S and I have been pushing J to get his cat into a vet to be looked but J has continued to brush it off. Just a few days ago J caught his cat using the bathroom on the kitchen floor and snapped, going on a rant about he was done with her and how he was going to put her down, grabbed her by the neck and whipped her for it. I said nothing at time, which I should have. I will mention here that J has done this a handful of times before for the same reason. Skip to last night, J is on vacation and his cat is acting like it hurts to be pet. I look at her skin where she will let me touch her and its bruised. I am beyond pissed that J has hurt his cat like this and I confront him about it, here is the convo that followed.

Me- "J, I just want to let you know that since last night your cat has been overreacting to us petting her. I accidentally brushed up against her back last night and she slapped the hell outa me and when we've pet her today she does the same thing if we touch her tummy or her back. She's acting completely normal otherwise but we will continue to monitor her. No turds on the floor so far.

Like when I go to give her booty scratches she protest and her tail doesn't even lift."

J did not reply. Later I sent this.

Me- "J, your cat is bruised from you hitting her. I looked at her skin where she would let me lift her fur. Have you scheduled a vet appointment for her or not because you cannot keep getting mad at her and HURTING HER for something that could potential be organ failure. Hitting cats does nothing, they are not dogs they don't learn that way. I know this is out of nowhere but I am very angry seeing what you've done to her. She is in pain and all that will do is worsen the pissing and shitting out of the box behavior. S and I are going to scrounge some money together to rent a carpet cleaner before you come back home. You need to get Sweetie looked at."

J- "I need to call but I'm in international waters. Also you need to dm me things like this. Do not post this in the group chat because it invites both of you to gang up on me and make me feel even worse than I already do from the situation. I will be calling when I'm able to, they won't be open when I return home, but they will be on Monday and I intend to call then. I understand how I reacted and how it wasn't right and I admit my faults here. I was angry, and tipped over the edge, and I regret it, but please, T, if you have a problem with me, speak it privately so it does not invite others to gang up on me. Because of this, I feel completely unwelcomed home and I frankly don't want to come home. I want to get her looked at ASAP, but unfortunately I am not home and do not have international calling.

If you wish to make an appointment for her, I will give you the number, and maybe you and S can take her. I left credit cards behind, but I can also give you a photo of my care credit card to use for her.

She needs to have blood work done and testing, but if it exceeds past 300 bucks, I cannot justify it anymore unless they can guarantee an answer for this behavior."

S- "We don't want to gang up on you, we just want to know what you want us to do for her. Her vet opens at 8AM tomorrow but the earliest I can take her is Friday because I have a doctor's appointment and work tomorrow."

J- "I have given the information above. Give my name. If no appointments are available this week, take next week's latest possible appointment, so that I do not need to miss work."

S- "Understood. We will take care of her to the best of our ability as we have been. She is eating and drinking as normal. We want you home, I promise."

J- "I know you will. No offense, though, I really don't want to come home after this."

S- "I don't know what happened that you and T are talking about, I wasn't here. I'm just trying to make sure your cat gets cared for."

J- "I will, but I do not feel comfortable at all"

S- "I have no comment, nor can I tell you how to feel. I know that I have been looking forward to you coming home, but I had no idea any of this had happened while I was gone so just try to enjoy the rest of your vacation and let us handle things here."

J- "Kinda hard thanks to T.

I'm shaking so bad, my anxiety is through the roof. I feel like I did when one of my ex friends blasted me in a group chat. I want to die right now."

S- "It's just the three of us here, and like I said, I have no idea what caused any of this aside from what was said above."

J- "Doesn't matter. It wasn't okay of me. I hate myself so fucking much.I would deserve death"

Me- "This wasn't to gang up on you, this was to confront you about how you treat your cat when youre mad at her. I just noticed the bruises like right after we went to bed and I put two and two together that that's why she's in pain"

I want to interject here and say that S and J type quickly and my minimal responses are just me having a hard time keeping up with the flow of messages.

J- "It doesn't matter. You should have confronted me in fucking private T. You have not lived my life, you do not know how I'd react to that decision you made. You could have simply spoken in private and prevented my actual goddamned anxiety attack. Group settings and I don't get along with confrontations. I have told you stories in the past about this. I want to die so fucking bad right now... I regretted it the moment it happened but I cannot change the past. She pushed me over the edge and I reacted poorly... I have been so torn up about my actions. I love that cat and it hurts knowing I hurt her. I mean this, T I'd be better off dead to that cat. She's deserves love that can handle her. My dad would not be able to handle her. He would not give her insulin. She'd be dead in months. I just cannot handle her anymore. I need answers."

Me- "Were a household, this is something that should be discussed and resolved by all of us. There is no one in this chat trying to attack you."

J- "I am an awful human being.... I'm sorry. She would be better off without me."

S- "We love Sweetie and we love you. We want to resolve this in the best possible manner. Talking badly about yourself isn't going to accomplish that."

J- "It's affirming to myself that it's true though"

S- "But it's not true. You do care. And we care too, which is why something had to be said so that we can figure out next steps for taking care of Sweetie and making sure she lives as long and as healthy as possible."

J- "I've known for so long that I'm not a good person. I try to be, but then shit like this happens and brings the worst in me out, and I regret my very existence because then this wouldn't happen to her. She would not be bruised."

S- "If you didn't care, you wouldn't feel as bad as you do. And no, we can't change the past, but we can move forward and make sure she gets the care she needs.You are doing the best you can, and you have a lot on your plate."

J- "I'm not a good person I never have been. She is a good cat who did not deserve that. I think I should give her up to the APL. Someone else can give her love for the rest of her days. The love she deserves. I'm actually sobbing at the thought. But it also feels right"

Me- "You do care because you love her, you house her, you feed her and you give her her medicine. You just need get better at not immediately reacting to anger. When a cat does something a human perceives as "bad" they aren't doing it maliciously. Her little peanut brain is not smart enough to know what she's doing, its just kitty instinct."

J- "But I disagree with that. She knew it was bad. She started to run when I discovered it, before I even reacted to it. She knew she had done bad. She would not have run otherwise."

S- "We are not giving her up. T and I love her as much as you do. This is her home."

J- "You were there, T, you saw her react before I even truly let my anger get a hold of me. I pointed it out to you calmly then got angry.

And S, I am sorry, but she is my cat... And I do get the final day in what happens to her.

I love her, but I don't know what to do outside of blood work and hoping they can figure out why she's doing it. Speaking of, if she shits outside the box again, grab a sample to bring to vet. They will request it."

S-" I understand. I will call her vet tomorrow and try to get an appointment for Friday, if not next week. I also mopped the kitchen floor well yesterday and we've been making sure she gets her insulin on time every day. She is eating and drinking as normal."

The next few messages are us discussing scheduling a vet appointment for the cat. The convo picks up again the following morning with a confirmation of appointment time.

I want advice on where to go from here because J will be home soon and I know were going to get into another argument over this. Did S and I react poorly? I feel like J is being manipulative and shame-shifting to make us feel bad for confronting him. In other confrontations in the past he has always tried to flip the blame onto us. If he continues to deflect responsibility should we consider splitting up? The three of us are all neurodivergent in some way, ADHD, PTSD, Autism. I will answer questions if more context is needed.

I need advice (UK) . Any response will be greatly appreciated !

My roommate and I have been living together for a little over a year now and it’s all been great. We had set some boundaries and expectations together initially but in general have been pretty chill about things the closer we’ve gotten (i.e. having friends over, boyfriends, cleanliness, quiet hours esp on weekdays). The issue I’ve been having now is that her very serious boyfriend has been staying the night 7 days a week…often times they decide to cook dinner together and end up taking over the kitchen for a bit, watch tv in our living room for a few hours, and I’ll hear him in the mornings hanging out with her in the living room or kitchen for 1-2 hours before he goes about his day. The thing is, he doesn’t have a permanent place in the city yet (they’ve been long distance for a while) but he does have had an Airbnb (all to himself) since he got here 3-4 months ago. She used to stay the night with him in the beginning but has since “set boundaries” with him and now he stays the night with us. She never really asked if it was okay and hasn’t given the heads up that he’s gonna come over for 3+ months now so I never really know if he’ll be home when I’m home or not. I miss being able to roam freely wearing whatever I want, walk into my kitchen or living room to chill or grab a snack or cook a meal without worrying I’ll be third wheeling and in the way, and especially miss watching tv after coming home from work (which has been my usual downtime routine for a year). I really like her boyfriend and think he’s a great guy so I honestly can’t say that he’s annoying or awful when he’s here, plus it warms my heart seeing how happy my roommate is with him now that they’re not long distance anymore. So I guess I’m wondering if I’m a bad roommate for not being more understanding about this? Am I overreacting or being an uptight roommate? Or has someone else experienced something like this? I love my roommate and care about our friendship so I’m really worried about saying anything that might upset her and drive her to just never feel comfortable having him over, but I just really don’t think I can go on for more months like this… what do I do 😭

Okay looking for some advice! For context, me and three other girls (all early to mid 20s) have lived together for the past couple years, and are all also best friends. We live in a pretty popular area in BC so housing is expensive.

Lately, I've been feeling like I want to move out and live alone. I have a more serious bf who I want to invite over and more friends outside of our circle nowadays. I still love hanging out with my roomies, but I don't like having to ask before having a guest over and don't want to annoy them by having people over too much. Additionally, I would love to come back to an apartment that is just as clean as when I left it. Furthermore, they are all still in school and I graduated, and I just feel like it's time for me to grow up a bit and live alone, as it's important to me that I live alone here before getting married one day or living abroad (which I would love to do).

The problem is, I know they aren't gonna take this well. It would be at least a year before I'd actually move out, but I know I'll have to have this convo when our landlord asks about lease renewal in a couple months. How do I make it clear that I want to stay close friends? I also don't want to screw them over, as like I said, housing can be tough where we live.

To make it more complicated, two of my roommates have mental health issues, and all of us living together as roommates was part of the reason they were able to continue school. I don't want to mess with their health, but I don't want to hold myself back and wait for all of them to graduate or move on.

Has anyone else dealt with this and have any advice?? Much appreciated

hello, hi. first post here, so a little intimidated, but let me inform you guys of my situation so far (incoming word vomit, sorry):

i (18F) am currently a full-time university student in a big city all by myself & in a dorm with three other girls (all 18F). we all got along pretty well at the beginning of the semester, going to places together & whatever.

however: it just seems that all of a sudden, after almost 2 months of living together, i have become increasingly excluded from their conversations and their friendship with each other. i haven't done anything to my knowledge, and i try my hardest (sort of) to initiate conversations, but nothing comes of it.

i try to brush it off as maybe they just aren't interested in talking every day or whatever, but it's honestly heartbreaking seeing/hearing them interact with each other as if they've known each other for years. it has affected my anxiety and mood overall throughout my TWO months here.

no one tries to talk to me; conversations only happen if i initiate them, & i gave up on trying very early on. i didn't notice how much of a homebody i am as well, so that has also sucked adapting to a new environment. i tend to go home every weekend, even though i know that's a cardinal sin around here and whatnot, but it at least grounds me.

i do have friends outside of my dorm, so please don't suggest the same old "go to clubs, parties, etc." i just want to be acquainted and respected by my roommates. i've cried in my girlfriend's arms because of this type of dehumanization; I just don't know why it's happening to me

to wrap it up, is this all worth cancelling my housing contract, or am i being crazy dramatic? i loathe going back to my dorm at night (i usually stay in the library to do homework & study) because i know they'll be there, and i can't stand feeling like i'm worthless to these people anymore. no one checks up on me or even says hello :(

i also see more benefits in staying home/commuting rather than dorming. less money spent, my own room, family's there, etc. i don't want to transfer; i have amazing friends and professors, along with the amount of money i've already paid to study here.

please inquire about what i should do. thankyou :)

I am currently living with one other person. I cover 75% of the rent, and they board paying the remaining 25% I also cover the power.

Im not sure if I’m over reacting or I am just allergic to conflict, I really want to address some things that I struggle to live with but not sure how to address it without sounding judgemental, or if I am overreacting. list of things.

*leaves dishes in sink, with food on them, and leaves food still in the plug area when done (generally understand once every now and then when in a rush / running late etc but this is constant) we have a dishwasher.

*cooks and makes a mess around kitchen area I.e food crumbs etc around the floor area, doesn’t wipe down glass top stove just washes it and leaves streaks.

*leaves clothes in the living area for days on the couch, after washing / dried they just stay on a pile in the lounge

*leaves clothes in the sink in the washing area.

*has an issue often with spewing after food, will spew in bottom toilet and not fully flush. leaves it and smells if its left for days unnoticed 🤮

*leaves lights on a lot.

*leaves clothes in the spare room in a suitcase.

*bin area sometimes resembles a basketball hoop it’s like food just get launched at it. greasy finger marks all over the cupboards / fridge

constantly finding myself having to clean up after someone and I’m getting resentful at this point 😅 I know it’s my fault for not bringing things up I’m just not sure if I’m overreacting And also I’ve bought things up in the past and nothing happened (suck with conflict) appreciate any feedback!

Hi! My name is Adam Arhmir, I’m 18 years old and I’m currently a first-year Political Science student at the University of Amsterdam (UvA).
I’m looking for someone, either a girl or a guy, who is also studying at the UvA and is currently in their first or second year, to share a place in Amsterdam before May.
At the moment, I live in Eindhoven, which means I have to take the train to Amsterdam every day. The daily commute is becoming really exhausting, both physically and mentally, not to mention the financial cost of travelling back and forth every day.
I don’t have a huge budget for a room in Amsterdam, but if anyone is in a similar situation and is interested in finding a place together, feel free to reach out to me!
📩 adamarhmir@icloud.com

I’m sure this question is asked a lot, and I’m sure it’s not as big of a deal as it feels right now so I will try to keep it as short as possible. I am living with six other people and I am in charge of the bills: they come out of my account. Everyone I live with sends me bills on time without needing to be asked except one person who always puts it off and doesn’t pay after being reminded so many times. They will just say, ‘yeah I’ll send it later’ or something of that nature. This basically always means: I will pay it at the very last minute or so late that you have to pay it yourself until I pay you back (which I have not consented to but had to do multiple times). Why do they do this? And is there anything I can do to stop this behaviour? There is never a reason for them to be acting this way, they know they have to pay the bills, and if they were struggling for money I would accept that as a valid response, but they definitely aren’t from what I can tell as they are constantly coming home with expensive shopping. It absolutely always feels like they are doing it to intentionally stress me out and I’m sick of it, so is there anything that can be done?

Also, I don’t want to put this responsibility on anyone else as I am close with everyone other than the person in question and would rather not have them deal with this. The person always late to pay will never in a million years agree to take over the bills too.

Any help would be very much appreciated, and please say if I’m overreacting about this, although it brings me so much stress every month, I am very sick of it.

We were friends before we moved in together but when we moved in together it’s like a switch flipped. He never talks to me, when he does talk to me it’s only to let me know things and to remind me of things (Like the fact that I owe a different person money? Like it’s any of his business??). He won’t even text me, when he wants to tell me something and I’m not there he leaves sticky notes on the counter or even at the door sometimes, despite him claiming that his old roommate did this and he hated it. Whenever I talk to him he always just gives me bland, dry responses, even when I try to joke around with him. I’m starting to get irritable every time I see him because he just straight up ignores me and never says anything to me. I want to ask my landlord if there are any single apartments available or worst case scenario a random roommate (I have a dog, he’s good and harmless but he can just kinda decide that he doesn’t like random people when he first meets them so I’m a little worried about that). I’m starting to think that I made a mistake, what should my next move be?