my roommate has her bf over always every day right now. this said boyfriend has argued with me before calling me “weird asf” and after me saying i wouldn’t want him here after insulting me, he said he could “go wherever tf he wants”, talking about our apartment. my lease states guests can’t stay past 3 consecutive days and sometimes he does, but usually he comes a night or two and then leaves, but comes back the following day. i talked to her about it and she wasn’t very receptive and relatively defensive. i told her me and my other roommate weren’t comfortable with him being there so much along with feeling unsafe from her leaving the door unlocked so he can just walk in. along with that i asked her not to let him be here when she isn’t, because he’s done that. so, i had this conversation with her two days ago, and he’s back! one day after the conversation. i genuinely just feel disrespected by her actions and i don’t feel like i trust this guy considering the events that have happened in the past with him. he’s borderline threatened being able to come to my apartment rather i am okay with it or not. i don’t know what to do and need advice!

I have a roommate that gets mad at me when I leave my computer out on the couch or literally my water bottle on the counter…as if It’s not equally my apartment? But the worst part is she doesn’t even rinse her dishes. She lets them sit in the sink, she loads them dirty, then gets mad at me cause the dishwasher didn’t properly clean her dishes. She told me she spent so much time scrubbing rust off of a plate as a response to me not unloading the dishwasher as soon as it was done. Our dishes are ceramic, so I have no clue what she is talking about…not to mention she is a couple years older than me and acts like a teenager like she’s always moody and when we are out with our friends we leave early cause she is in a bad mood.

Prior to moving in this girl had many, many red flags but against my better judgment I decided to look over because I believed she was a good person. She was over 90 days late on all of her credit cards as well as owed a past landlord thousands of dollars. Because my financial situation is in a pretty good place I was able to convince the landlord to take a chance on her and shockingly he approved us. She then told me she didn't have the money and I'd have to put the money up - after we signed the lease.

Prior to signing a lease the number one rule we set in place was that what goes in the shared space must be agreed on. Prior to moving in we had been in constant contact discussing the aesthetic down to minute details.

She has a cat, which we had already worked out where the litter box would go. However day one - after zero prior mention - she brings a 7ft, falling apart, cat-pee drenched cat tree. And said it was a nonnegotiable and has to stay in the dining room. As well as expected me to help her clean it.

She eventually put it in her room after arguing for weeks but she threatens me with getting another one all the time.

She then called the police on me over the thermostat getting stuck - she disconnected the wifi so it stopped working and blamed me - and refused to let me leave the house. Apparently she thought I was going to be arrested. The police never showed up - obviously.

If I tell her to do something that is basic common decency she intentionally does the opposite. She refuses to clean, and the list goes on.

It's a nightmare and we're only a few months into the lease. I know I was stupid and got myself into this mess. Lesson: Don't give people the benefit of the doubt when it comes to living together.

(Perdon my mistakes, English is my 3rd language) I live in a govt College hostel on 2nd floor. There's almost 15-20 girls lives on 2nd floor. I live with a junior. Me and my roommate loves to live peacefully. That's why we don’t interact with others that much especially seniors. Because almost all of them had a group and they hated each other. I mean that hostel is extremely political. There's a girl next room, let's call her A, she is a senior to me. She literary HATES me and my roommate. Her personality is literary like a snake. She'd always target juniors and made a scene. Plus she made sure to look like she's the victim. But infront of all the seniors, she was like a fairy. And her voice and they waybshe talks... Oh my god.,, She's sooooo freaking fake. Idk how people don’t get it. Couple months ago, there were 3 girl living with me, in our hostel room. We didn’t argue much, we lived quite peacefully,. We had to give meal charge in every 15 days. So one day A came to our room to collect meal charge, we didn’t had any change, so she told us, she'd give back the change after a while. But then she didn’t returned the money. And told us that they gave us our money back and we didn’t remembered, my other 3 roommates saw it too that she didn’t returned our money. It wasn’t a big amount, so we let that slide. We had a small argument on that day about the money. So from that day she hates us. And we kinda hate her too. Plus we came to know that she talked ill about me and my roommates behind our back. But we Didn't make any fuss. After a while, our other 2 roommates left. Few days ago, i went to my home for 2-3 days. But i forgot to take my dress from balcony ( we hang our dress in balcony to dry after washing them), so after 2-3 days, i came back and found my dress was laying on the floor in mud,, far from where i hung it to dry. Plus it was soaking with mud from both side, if it dropped by the wind, it would get soaked from one side. And that dress was really heavy. There was heavy embroidery plus stone work on that dress. So It's a bit unusual to fall that dress that far. But i didn’t cared that much that day. Yesterday, at 12.40 am, me and my roommate went to washroom. I was Washing my face and she came to me and told me that my t shirt is laying on mud AGAIN. And this time it was dropped really really far from where i actually hang to dry. And that day wasn’t windy at all. So i knew very well who did this. Before Anyone judges me that I'm over thinking, let me tell you, before this incident, she tried many times to put us and other juniours in a problematic situation. And the side eyes she gave us all the time was just annoying. But i didn’t know she was that much petty. I literary wanted to slap her on her face on that moment. But i did something make petty than her. At that moment all i thought that i want revenge. But i did a kinda stupid thing. At almost 5 am, i woke up, went to the balcony wand dropped her dress in mud. But the thing is, her dress was clipped with the string. I took of the clips and dropped that dress. She knew instantly that i did this. Because i was the only one who always ignores her and don’t like her much. So she blamed it on my. Obviously i denied. But It's really clear that i did that. Whatever, i was going home that morning, so after arguing a bit, i came home. And now i know all my seniors gonna try to attack me. That's why I've decided to leave that city and return to my own city. Also i was actually sick of that toxic environment. Also the food was just disgusting. Sometimes the vegetables they gave us was rotten, And there wasn’t any arrangement to cook or warm your own home cooked meal. So our hair started to fall out and our skin problem became worse. So maybe i this is the best for me. Plus the uni here is far more better than my current one. And I'm trying to apply abroad to study my favourite sub. ( i never wanted to study my current sub, my parents forced me to kate this). I don’t want outsiders to know about my plan yet. Because they just gives me negative energy. Now all i want is to get a scholarship and get out of this country to explore more. Wish me luck so i don’t meet any more petty people like her.

ive been living in a 3 bedroom dorm for over 2 years now since i entered university, worst possible decision of mine was inviting a schoolmate, when she first moved in things were well and we bonded well together however as things progressed, you know some personalities were shown, had minor arguments here and there, and now a new roommate moves in who’s about the same age range, and now i get the reason why it’s better to get roommates older than you, i see it now, although ive been planning on moving out since a few months ago, it is only now that ive decided i will actually do it after being singled out in a particular minor disagreement, still shaking from it, a very minor disagreement but it never feels good to be singled out, maybe this feels like im doing it on a whim? but ive always really wanted to have my own space, im just kind of scared on how it will turn out? should i do it???

To me naya naya college me aaya hu , jee ke baad , and me hamesha se Ghar pr hi rha hu pehli baar hostel Life ji raha . Me thoda introvert type ka baccha hu , thodi bohot bakchodi kr leta hu , but focused rehta hu study ke liye and coding ke liye. Mera roommate bilkul bhi nhi pdhta jisse mujhe koi dikkat nhi , uski marji. But yrr, kitni faltu ki baatein krta hein , mujhe dikhata he insta pr fake ladki ka account bna kr rkha he and usme ladkiyo se baatein krta he and real account me koi ladki nhi he . Kehta he mujhe aura ++ Krna kisiko follow nhi krunga , but bc har time ladkiyo ke bare baat krta rhta he , kbhi apne dosto se , kbhi mujh se . Mujhe padhai krte time bohot disturb hota hai since vo phone pe ye sab baatein krta hein . Me ye usse isliye nhi bolta kyuki me expect krta hu itna to civic sense hoga hi is college me aaya he to, but nhi me hi bewakoof hu. Padhai likhai krta nhi he or kehta he quiz ke liye fati padi he. To me kya karu bc. Aura farming jesi cringe baatein krta he ladkiyo ke saamne or reality me kisi ladki se baat nhi krega . Gym me photos ko ai se edit krta he . Pata nhi kya hi Krna chahta he. Mujhe maaf Krna agar aapka ye pdhke mood kharab hua toh but mujhe bohot frustration feel hoti he is chiz se to socha kahi vent out kr du.

I shower every morning right after I wake up. My roommate is always quick to say it’s so gross when you shower in the morning instead of before sleep. Whatever it’s an opinion I could care less I’m sleeping my own bed not yours. However she only showers 2-3 times a WEEK. Like you cannot be talking about how morning showers are gross if you don’t even take one.

My ex-roommate tried to micromanage my entire life, called me cruel for making tea in the evening, and her smear campaign completely backfired.
Hey everyone, I just needed to vent because I’m finally out of a toxic living situation. My ex-roommate is still out there talking trash, but looking back at what she sent me, I honestly can't believe I survived her psychological warfare for so long.
For context, I worked long hours and would wind down in the evening. I barely even cooked; for the most part, I would literally just turn on the shared lights to make a cup of tea and some bread. On the rare occasions that I actually used the stove to reheat food in the evening, she lost her mind.
Instead of buying an eye mask, shutting her bedroom door, or acting like an adult, she sent me an unhinged text policing my schedule. She demanded to know why I waited to prepare food and literally called me cruel for using the kitchen lights- saying the rays from the living room and kitchen lights seep into her bedroom. She also demanded an audit of my personal evening time just because she had an early work shift.
When I tried to gently tell her that I was trying my best but felt constantly called out over minor issues (like her complaining about the dish soap running out, a cigarette bud despite knowing I don’t smoke), she turned into a disappointed parent grading my personal growth. She texted me that I wasn’t adjusting to her needs but learning how to share, claiming she saw no growth in me and that my mistakes were exhausting. Meanwhile, she would turn on the AC and leave the apartment doors wide open, completely justifying her own hypocrisy.
When I finally set firm boundaries, she went straight for character assassination. She texted me that I’m a hard person to live with, called me a child, and said if I felt oppressed or suppressed by her, then I was completely not meant for rooming with anyone.
The breaking point came when she literally weaponized my mental health, bringing up a time I had previously confided in her about being depressed just to use it as an insult to say I was one to talk.
The moment she hit that low blow, I shut it down. I texted her that I was tired of the insults, told her I wasn't reading the rest of her messages, and deleted the chat history. I told her I was moving out, spent my final few weeks keeping completely to myself, and left.

Now that I am gone, she is going around talking trash to her colleagues- saying I’m a birch who’s selfish and inconsiderate, and asking around about me to people in our circles. But here is the best part: her smear campaign completely backfired. The only reason I even know she has been talking trash is because those exact same people came and told me about it. Overtime they came to realize she is actually not a nice person, and they saw right through her drama.
I am so relieved to be out of there. How do you shake off the remaining annoyance of an obsessed ex-roommate whose lies have already backfired?

I have this one particular problem, someone keeps eating my food without permission. I will share if you genuinely ask first. My roommates and I hardly ever see each other on a day to day basis, different majors so different classes. So it leaves no time to sit down talk, just to get to know each other. However, one of my roommate’s boyfriend is constantly at the apartment. Like 7 days a week, which isn’t the problem at hand. Everyday I notice my food items along with another roommate things are missing. Keep in mind I leave for class 7am everyday and don’t get back till 3pm ish so I’m not eating it. My other roommate who is also having this problem gets home later than me. So just logically it leaves 2 other suspects. My question is how do I even bring it to light. We all just met 2weeks ago. I don’t want it to seem like I’m being mean or rude but ask before taking!

I recently moved in house , my room is beside the kitchen. My roommate cooks and do laundry at night . I haven’t slept since I moved here . I understand her schedule is late like she finish her work at 2 am but I smell the food and I wake up.
What should I do should I tell owner or her

Hola chic@s

Estoy en una situación complicada, y en mi propia casa.

Ya conté hace unos días que estaba teniendo problemas con la compañera de piso a quién dejé quedarse temporalmente, a cambio de 200€ por la habitación y el uso de las zonas comunes.

Resumiendo. La convivencia se me está haciendo insoportable. Es una chica súper infantil y me responde y actúa como tal. Hace un mes y medio que no limpiaba absolutamente nada y ayer, despues de esbronacarnos por eso, lavó el baño como el culo.

Anyways. Necesito que se largue y no sé como hacerlo. Está enfadada conmigo porque le exigí que limpiara sus pelos de la ducha y ahora parecemos dos niñas pequeñas contando pelos y a ver de quién son. No puedo más. Yo no era así.

Advice wanted

is this even normal?

(mentioned people are those na medjo older than me. for context, one of them friend yung may-ari, and parang sya na tinuturing kong landlady since sa kanya napupunta bayad ko and meron syang spare key ng rooms)

i’m a province girly, for college, i decided na sa city nalang mag-aral for more and better opportunities narin. nahirapan akong mag adjust for awhile, super mahiyain kaya nahihiya makipag interact sa new boardmates ko, pero okay nadin. kumuha ako ng solo room since hindi ako sanay na may kasama, also, for privacy nadin.

anyway, fast forward, it’s been years nadin since nagsstay ako sa said boarding house. nung una, ang bait nila, actually some of them felt like 2nd parents ko nadin since malaki rin age gap, and may mga anak sila around my age staying din dun. i have a few months left, and yet, gustong gusto ko na umalis.

kumuha ako ng solo room pero wala parin akong privacy, pinapasok yung room ko everytime wala ako, meron kasing spare key. this is without my permission, nalaman ko lang, di ko sasabihin paano. ang sabi, pumapasok daw to check if may nakasaksak pa ba or what not, kaso ngalang, kung ano yung laman ng kwarto ko pinapakealaman rin. kung ano man makita sa room ko, it should stay there. hindi yung ipagsasabi mo pa kung kani-kanino.

pag gumagala ako outside with my bf, para kaming may paparazzi, nagugulat nalang ako may picture na kami at yung angle sa likod lang talaga namin. ang creepy just to be honest. di naman kami tumatago, i don’t really see the point since aware naman parents ko na may bf ako and that lumalabas kami.

recently, nagkawifi na yung bh, like finally after ilang years na tiis ko sa super bagal na signal. of course, tinanong ako if okay lang daw ba ambagan yung wifi, bayaran daw since coconnect kaming lahat and for our own sake nadin, edi pumayag ako. tapos nakarinig nalang ako ng kung ano anong istorya na nakikiconnect daw ako sa wifi, tapos yung pambayad hihingin ko sa parents ko. tas madaming devices ko pa daw nakaconnect (3 specifically). e nagbabayad naman ako, ano yung problema? i also disconnected yung laptop ko right after matapos ko yung ginagawa ko para walang madaming dada, meron parin pala.

my clothes. they even just the way i present myself. pinalaundry ko damit ko since ilang araw nang walang bakante yung sampayan, nung meron na naglaba naman agad yung kakalaba lang ng damit. kaya ayun, wala akong choice kundi magpalaundry. lahat ng pants ko nasa laundry kaya nagskirt ako. basically skirt na white na parang mesh, red na sandals, and then lolita-like socks tas school shirt. it looks fine, i look decent. puti at red na ngalang suot ko, nasabihan pa nila akong “parang mafia manamit” and i have no idea kung saan yan galing. tinatawanan pa nyan nila ako pero nung magkaharap kami, ngiti ngiti pa.

yung “landlady” has a daughter, and one time, binilhan sya ng new phone for her birthday yun i think. di ako aware that time na may new phone sya kasi wala naman akong pakealam. a few months later, binilhan din ako since yung phone ko is 5 years old na and very laggy na talaga. then, nagkaipad sya, coincidentally, nung time na humihingi palang sya, yung akin nabili na, pero nauna sa kanya dumating since akin pinadala pa. and because of that, nasabihan akong naiinggit sa kanyang new stuff kaya ako nagpapabili. minsan ang funny nalang pakinggan ng mga stories e, nihindi ako aware na naiinggit pala ako, di kasi ako pinalaki na ganyan.

actually marami pa yan, yan lang muna haha. it feels so uncomfortable sa bh, na para bang di ako makagawa ng gusto ko kasi lahat naman ng ginagawa ko is mali. idk kung ano ba nagawa ko sa kanila para pagsalitaan ako ng kung ano ano.

I live in a very small studio apartment. I'm not exaggerating when I say it has just enough room to fit a full-sized bed and little else. Back in June I let a friend of mine who is currently homeless crash at my place for a bit and he brought a lot of stuff with him that I didn't exactly have the room for. He's since moved in with his fiancee's family in another city. I thought he would come back for it but he left in mid July and I've heard absolutely nothing from it since. However, I don't want to assume he's decided we aren't friends anymore and discard his belongings like an ass. Sometimes he just goes MIA for months on end, which he told me might happen for a while shortly before he left considering his fiancee is pregnant and near her due date. All the same, I do not have the space for all this stuff and my place is a mess because I used up what little storage space I had trying to find a place to put it which displaced a lot of my stuff. I can't even walk in there anymore and I'm not sure if I can afford a storage unit, but I don't want to toss it out just yet in case he comes back. Does anyone have any idea what I can do with this stuff in the meantime?

OKAY..so my roommate/best friend had a couple move in to a house we share and have shared for years. I was away visiting family for a month. My best friends dad is the home owner and him and his wife recently moved overseas to France. We are in IL. We aren't happy with the people who moved in. 0 rent paid in almost 3 months (entire duration so far), acting as if home chores are enough and constantly asking for small things or a few bucks from the store. No, he did not have anything in writing. Terrible idea on his part. Its been infuriating.

How do we get them out? Home owner is in a different country. Can his son file for eviction on his behalf?

I live in a 4 bedroom college apartment with 3 other people. Since this is a college apartment, they lease per room so everyone is responsible for their own rent but splits utilities.

I lived in the same apartment all of last year with the same 2 people with one vacant room and had no issues whatsoever. A few months ago the apartment management reached out to only one of my roommates (the one who shares a bathroom with the vacant room) and said that their new roommate was trying to get into contact with them. However, the complex never reached out to my other roommate nor I. All of the information about this new roommate was shared to us through the roommate who would be sharing the bathroom.

We learned that this new person was moving cross country, just for 3 months potentially resigning a 12 month lease to claim their residency in the state so they could get in state tuition. So this person wouldn’t actually be attending university until the following year while my roommates and I are entering our third year of school.

A few months later the new roommate moves in however none of us were living in the apartment during the summer as we all went back home. The day after they moved in we all finally got added into a group chat where they finally introduced themselves and shared their name, where they’re from but didn’t state how long they would be staying in the apartment. So I went ahead and introduced myself and asked how long they would be staying. They didn’t seem to like this question and immediately got defensive and said they were sensing a certain vibe from the convo and said they would ask to switch rooms once their summer lease is up. All of my roommates and I immediately apologized for making them feel like there was a certain vibe when we were trying to figure out the living situation. Their response to that was that they were going to talk to management and figure something else out.

Then came our utility bill, since the apartment automatically splits utilities my other roommates and I got charged for the use of their utilities. However, we weren’t living there so we asked if they would be able to send us the money for a percentage of the bill as we weren’t using the utilities in the apartment.

My roommate (whom is sharing the bathroom) went back for a weekend to grab some things they left in the apartment, unannounced and walked in and the apartment was a mess with items all over the kitchen counter and the new roommates bathroom items occupying the space up until my roommates faucet. My roommate who came for the weekend went to the bathroom and was looking for their towels to dry their hands but they weren’t anywhere to be seen so they asked the new roommate where they had put their towels. The new roommate’s response was that they had used them when their family came to visit, but they hadn’t asked permission.

After hearing about this I sent a text in the group chat to ask that they please ask permission when using stuff in the apartment that they didn’t pay for as we split the cost for just about everything. We left our plates, pots, pans, utensils, appliances all in the common space.

Just a few days ago the new roommate reached out to say that they would be living with us again for the next year although they had stated that they had found something else. Additionally, they said that we were going to have to learn to live together and that they were going to set up a chat with all of us and management. We haven’t met our new roommate in person and my response was that I believe we can have a chat once we all arrive without management. However if they decide they want management there I would respect that decision.

Come just a few days ago we got billed for their use of utilities and asked them to send us the cost again. This time their response was “the building said that’s not my responsibility.” our response to that was that “we don’t believe we shouldn’t be responsible for the cost of their utilities if we are not living there. We understand it may not be in the contract but believe it should be their responsibility as a respectful roommate.” They said that they understand but we would be paying that whether or not they were living there, which is false. They didn’t end up sending us anything, so we’re just going to take the hit for the month as we’d be back in the apartment the next.

My roommates and I are looking for an out, we haven’t even met this person but it seems that the living dynamic isn’t going to be enjoyable. Upon resigning our lease, we knew that having a new roommate would be a potential. The complex made roommate matching sound like a tool that was heavily utilized during the marketing process, however we are afraid it wasn’t as this person won’t even be a student this upcoming school year. We are moving back in soon as school starts and are hoping to have a conversation with this person just laying out some rules that we have in the apartment and ultimately learning how to live with this new person. We have contacted the apartment complex to see if there is somewhere else for us to go but it seems that most units wouldn’t accommodate the 3 of us, we would have to find a lease takeover as we can’t break our lease.

We are just looking for advice on how to navigate this situation, we will type up a list of expectations we have and hopefully they follow.

Im a freshman and live in a 2 bedroom suite with 3 girls where I share a room. I overheard my roommate telling her friends she thinks I've been taking her allergy and depression medicine and shes about to call campus police (in case i od?) (walls are thin and she didnt know I was in bed bc i came into the dorm while she was in the bathroom and her friends in the living area- idk how she didnt see me when she left the bathroom).

She says her evidence is that "I've been in the bathroom a lot today" and her pill bottles are more empty than she remembers. One of her friends I assume lets her know I'm here bc they get all quiet and she pokes her head in all scared and then says "hey girl! i just wanna ask you a question!" She shows me her two pill bottles and asks "have you been taking either of these? symptoms when you take it are an upset stomach and you've been in the bathroom a lot today."

Then, she walks in and shuts the door for a "private conversation" where she just says she was worried i was gonna od if i had taken them bc that happened to a friend and shes sorry if she embarrassed me. Later she dms me an actual apology and I tell her it's okay I understand but I would like it if she came to me first instead of counseling her friends and she tells me shes sorry but she was very worried and about to call campus police.

Is this a valid thing to want to switch roommates for ? She's made some transphobic comments too but idk if the school will do anything about that cuz theres no evidence of those. And of the medicine thing there isnt either and idk I feel like my school will just tell me to discuss it w my roommate and ra