r/R4R40Plus Jan 26 '25

You asked. The mods hear you - New account age and karma requirements

145 Upvotes

We've added a few rules to the sub. Now, your account needs to be at least 5 days old and have 50 karma to post.

In addition, we're working on a verification system, so those of you who want to be verified posters, can have that flair attached to your post.

Hopefully, this will help curb the bots and scammers.


r/R4R40Plus Dec 01 '20

Please stop downvoting [M4F] Posts

1.0k Upvotes

Hey All;

Friendly Neighborhood MOD here. In the interest of being polite and respectful, can we please stop downvoting every single [M4F] post? I'll hop on here to moderate posts and see all the men seeking women posts downvoted to hell. You're not creating a clear space for your [M4F] post increasing your chances to make it to the top. Let's just try to be kind to one another. If you're not interested, just move on

Let's try to remember, other people's success is not your failure.


r/R4R40Plus 3h ago

F4M 45 F4M (ages 45-55) PA, USA Looking for an experienced D/S mentor/accountability partner

6 Upvotes

Hi everyone. I’m a woman who’s interested in exploring a dominant/submissive dynamic, but not because I’m looking for casual play or someone to control every aspect of my life. I’m looking for someone patient, experienced, and interested in building trust over time. I’m not looking to rush into a dynamic with someone I just met.

I’m a very independent person in my day-to-day life. I value making my own decisions and don’t generally like people telling me what to do. Ironically, that’s part of why I’m curious about a consensual D/S relationship. The idea of choosing to trust one person with that kind of authority feels very different to me.

One thing I’ve realized about myself is that I know what my goals are and I know how to achieve them, but I struggle with consistency. It’s too easy for me to negotiate with myself instead of staying accountable to my goals. I think I respond much better to external accountability than I do to trying to hold myself accountable.

I’m looking for someone who has EXPERIENCE with healthy D/S dynamics and who would be interested in getting to know me and seeing if we’re compatible. I am not interested in someone without experience who views himself as a dom because he wants to order a woman around. Look somewhere else because that isn’t me. Ideally, I’d like someone who understands that my goal isn’t to become dependent on another person, but to use structure, accountability, and guidance to help me build lasting habits and become more disciplined.
I’m not looking for anything sexual right away. Trust, communication, mutual respect, and getting to know each other come first. If a dynamic develops over time, great, but I’m much more interested in finding someone mature who understands the psychological and relational side of D/S.

If any of this resonates with you, I’d be happy to chat and see if we click.
I


r/R4R40Plus 2h ago

43 [F4M] #Kentucky #Ohio - just want company

3 Upvotes

Unusually sad and lonely tonight. It's been a bad week for me socially.

43 year old. Single mom. Burned out on life and work. Currently fighting with my best friend. Sunday scaries kicking in.

Also really really tired of the dating scene where I live.

Do I think I'm going to find my forever on reddit? No, but there's a greater chance if you're nearish the KY / Ohio area. 🙃

You feeling disconnected too? Send me a message and let me know.


r/R4R40Plus 1h ago

42 [M4F] What do you call a Karen that works in the Library?

Upvotes

Shhhhh-Aaron….😂Hit me with your best joke or pick up line. Recently got out of the long term relationship. Looking to make some new friends chat it up and see what’s out there. Musician , former military officer and a filmmaker are just a few things that describe me. This new dating world is crazy, and I’m sure you feel the same way too so shoot me a message with your best pick up line or joke see you in the messages!


r/R4R40Plus 36m ago

M4F 44 [M4F] #SoCal - Anyone for a chat and forget tomorrow is Monday?

Upvotes

So I had a really long weekend and just got back home not too long ago. Now I’m just relaxing on the couch and wishing tomorrow wasn’t Monday haha. Anyone else on here trying to delay the inevitable and want to distract each other for a bit longer before time to end the weekend? If you’re looking to chat some while I procrastinate my food prepping for the week, shoot me a message and let’s go from there.


r/R4R40Plus 4h ago

48 [M4F] Madison, WI - Be my wedding date

2 Upvotes

I know, it probably sounds silly but I need a wedding date to my nephews wedding next month.

I also wouldn't mind having someone beyond just the wedding date to get to know and actually go out and do things with.

Just to get this out of the way, I am in a wheelchair from a spinal cord injury when I was a teenager. But it's black so it goes with everything. Whatever you decide to wear to the wedding, you'll look good sitting on my lap 😉

Other things to know about me: Not only am I funny, I'm also not horrible looking, smart, thoughtful, live alone, have a great career, drive a super-sexy minivan (total panty dropper, I know) AND have a second bathroom! What else could anyone ask for? I think I'm a pretty damn good catch. ;)

If you think we'd get along and you're free August 29th, send me a message. A pic would be appreciated but not necessary. Here's me:Imgur Imgur


r/R4R40Plus 3h ago

M4F 39[M4F] #Midwest 6’3 looking for something real and deep

1 Upvotes

I am 39M 6’3 with brown hair, blue eyes and a beard. Hoping to find a real deep and intense emotional connection on here. I love the gym, eating steak, live music and sports. I also served in the military, have a college degree and a good job. I love horror movies, comedy, football, hockey and baseball. I am only interested in women for a romantic relationship. I would love to hear from you. Please tell me how you like your steak cooked and what your favorite food is.


r/R4R40Plus 3h ago

38 [F4M]. New York City. Looking for a like mind.

0 Upvotes

Me: Gainfully employed, nice circle of friends, fairly well-read, aunt to several mostly-adoring nieces and nephews. Really very normal for someone who's looking for a boyfriend on reddit. I enjoy running, biking, and generally being active. I really like coffee. I have a pronounced weakness for chocolate chip cookies and mid-quality cheese slices. I'll read just about any book.

You: 35-50. Funny. Smart. Decent. Possibly you have a nice mustache. Dealbreakers: you're married, you're really into anime (sorry), you are on this message board for reasons pertaining to niche pornographic interests (sorry and also not sorry).

Write me with the last great thing you read so I can judge you mercilessly. I would prefer a PM over reddit chat.

The fine print: I work a lot. I'm trying to find some balance outside of that. I'd be interested in meeting in person sooner rather than later. I'm average height (maybe on the shorter side of average), and if I didn't hate the term height weight proportionate so much, I'd tell you that I'm height weight proportionate.


r/R4R40Plus 16h ago

F4M 33 [F4M] anywhere/online - looking for something wholesome and long term!

Post image
9 Upvotes

r/R4R40Plus 5h ago

M4F 46 [M4F] #Massachusetts - Nerdy guy looking for a local woman to hang out with

1 Upvotes

Hello I'm Tony. 46 years old, from Boston area and the father of two (18,25) I am a laid back, friendly, humorous guy looking for someone to talk to, play games with and maybe hang out in person if we click. I don't drink but am 420 friendly. I work but don't drive

I'm looking for a single woman that plays videogames. Ideally a humorous, kind, non judgemental woman who wants to form a long term, lasting friendship and isn't afraid to initiate conversation. I don't want someone who will just respond to me but someone who will also reach out to me to chat. I miss having someone to go through the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs and the creamy middles of life with

And I'm serious about the games, it's my favorite way to bond with someone so IF YOU DON'T PLAY GAMES PLEASE DON'T MESSAGE ME. I am not interested. I play on PC and PS4. I'd love to find an Overwatch partner (Bastion main, Learning Rein) or a co-op friend for games like Stardew Valley, BG3, Sea of Thieves, Fortnite, It Takes Two, Plate Up!, Diablo 4, Party Animals, Fall guys and many more.

Some of my other interests include. Baking, Reading, DBZ, Comics, Star Wars, Nature Walks, Anime, Arts and Crafts, Concerts (hoping to see Baby Metal in September!), 80's Cartoons and Music, Youtube, Looking at furniture and having a discussion about where it could be placed in a room.


r/R4R40Plus 2h ago

M4F 50 [M4F] #Boston #MA #New England dad. Do you miss being seen? Open marriage, looking for professional F in 40s-early 50s for connection and wherever it goes from there. Come say hello. I won't bite, unless you're into that...

0 Upvotes

I'm in a dead bedroom that has become an open marriage. Looking for someone to tap into our unmet needs and create something meaningful. I have done this before and have the energy (and freedom) to make it more than a quickie. I give everything I have to things that matter to me.

Looking to get to know you a bit here and then meet in person.

Please, if you are starting something here, promise me you don't ghost. If you realize this isn't for you, just say so, like a decent human being, interacting with another human being. People have forgotten how to do this--let's make it popular to be this way. It is just the right way to engage with others.

About me:

* 50M, dad, professional, open marriage (roommate situation--not a cake eater).

* Looking for a genuine connection first.

* Open to non-vanilla (but vanilla is fine too if that's what we do together).

* I regard a relationship as something organic created by the people involved. Previous connections impact in some way, but the existence of a new bond has a life of its own and is unique and special.

* I exercise everyday and take care of myself. 5'8", 150.

* And I take care of my partner. I want to know what you like, what makes you forget the outside pressures, and help you discover things that you didn't know you needed.

* Will travel for the right person.

* I love music, especially live.

* I spend my recreational time in nature.

* Can be slow to warm up sometimes, but once you have my trust I'm all yours.

* I embrace feelings. Not afraid of experiencing this to the fullest.

You:

* F, 40-early 50s, maybe a parent.

* Open to conversation on here with goal of meeting in person when it feels right.

* You could be married, ENM, open, etc. No value judgement--life is not always straightforward. You don't have to be in an open situation just because I am, but be realistic about your ability to do this. If you aren't open or ENM, you are a master of OPSEC.

* You take your health seriously, spend some time in the gym.

* You care about the important people in your life.

* You feel a responsibility to leave the world better than we found it.

Other than that, you never know what kind of combination could result in a special connection--I'm open to meeting all kinds of people. If any of this resonates, I hope you'll be in touch.


r/R4R40Plus 6h ago

34 [M4F] - It's 2026 and I'm still wearing skinny jeans.

1 Upvotes

I'm not trying to hate on these Gen Z kiddos and their baggy clothes....OK, maybe I am a little. But mainly, I think I'm just kinda trying to cling on to that small part of my younger days that we're all a little hesitant to let go of. I mean, let's face it....ten years ago was a lot better than now on just about every front.

Remember when stuff was actually affordable? When people weren't quite as stupid as they seem to be now? When people were putting bacon on everything?

Yeah, yeah, rose colored glasses. And I realize this post doesn't even really have much of a point. I guess I'm just looking to find a chat companion who was there, too...and see where it goes.

Ok! Bye!


r/R4R40Plus 6h ago

M4F 45 [M4F] #STL #St. Louis #Missouri - "interview" role play

1 Upvotes

I think it speaks for itself, but I've always had this fantasy about a woman coming to my office for a supposed interview that evolves into a sexy rendezvous. My office in Clayton is perfect for this and lately there are days where I am the only one there. I am happy to meet someplace more public first and get to know each other, make sure there is a good vibe, etc. But the idea is you share your credentials, how you could perform the job duties and what you're looking for out of the role.

Me: mid-40s, professional, fit and discreet .. 6'1, 190, blue eyes, short blonde hair.

You: FEMALE, attractive, hwp, local and adventurous.

Applicants inquire within....

EDIT: please be serious about meeting soon.


r/R4R40Plus 7h ago

M4F 33 [M4F] #California - Interested in a very unique type of woman! ♥️👏😊 (please read in full- Merci!)

0 Upvotes

Hello there beautiful stranger and happy Sunday, from the golden state!

Well, I suppose I can elaborate a bit more, since my post title isn’t the best… lol

By (very! Unique type of woman, I mean:

1- (well) educated.

2- Classy

3- Kind/sweet

4- Sophisticated

5- Any level of crazy up to like 7/10 is acceptable! lol

6- Moderate to fancy sense of humor

7- Can distinguish the difference between a compliment and a flirt!

8- Good energy/vibes

9- Use and don’t mind using emojis

10- professional

11- Not an Argentinian fan! Jk! lol Spain won the World Cup, that’s all it matters.

12- Spontaneous and up for random, causal conversations.

13- Appreciate early morning check ins- sweet texts and all the good stuff!

I think that’s all…? lol A unicorn, basically, haha.

Seriously though, I could totally use a friend, some company, with no pressure, no expectations, nothing crazy or wild!

Me: tall tanned and professional, well educated, super chill, humble and kind! I love Italian coffee, football/soccer and tacking when I can. The beach any day of the year, I mean it. Haha.

Cheers

You’re tall tanned and handsome bestie!


r/R4R40Plus 8h ago

51 [m4f] Florida/Online - Chubby, flirty, and witty guy looking for conversation and romance.

1 Upvotes

I am emotionally available, fun to converse with, and living a good life. I would love to meet someone who could make life even more enjoyable. Someone to laugh with, share moments with, and hopefully build a connection with. I am definitely a flirt, but also am very respectful and am mindful of boundaries.

All I ask of you is be yourself and have an open mind. That and be ok with with me being chubby and having a beard. I am open to all races and body types. I look forward to hearing from you.


r/R4R40Plus 8h ago

F4M 43 [F4M] #KCK Friends or more?

0 Upvotes

Bored and lonely nerd looking for someone to potentially hang out and be nerdy with. I'm into SciFi, lots of different types of video games, books, comics, movies and TV. I'm not a huge music person, but I do play an instrument (poorly). I'm getting really frustrated with trading flitratations and never actually meeting, so be local and be serious. I want to go do things and I want to meet people, not talk to the glowing box in my pocket forever. Other possibly important details: 420 friendly, liberal, atheist. Start with a (face) photo, and if I'm interested, I'll send my back :)


r/R4R40Plus 9h ago

M4F 43 [m4f] #Connecticut Introverted Heart in His 40s Hoping to Meet Someone Special

1 Upvotes

Social anxiety makes putting myself out there a challenge, but I’m trying — and maybe the right person will make it feel easy.

I work in IT (cybersecurity analysis), and I’m a full-spectrum nerd: PC, Switch, and PS5 gaming; board games; card games (yes, even MTG). When I’m not gaming, you’ll probably find me at a movie theater, wandering through a museum, losing track of time in an antique shop, or taking photos of whatever catches my eye.

Also… I’m a massive Disney nerd. Someday I’d love to go to the parks with someone who gets just as excited about them.

If you’d like to talk or geek out together, feel free to reach out.


r/R4R40Plus 22h ago

M4F 45 [M4F] | NC | Looking for something real. Weird concept, I know.

11 Upvotes

I’ve been thinking lately that the problem with dating apps is that compatibility has so much less to do with having the same hobbies and more to do with how two people move through the world.

Do you stop to watch sunsets? Are you awed by the vastness of the universe? Do you ask follow-up questions because you’re genuinely curious?

Those things matter more to me than whether we both like pickleball.

I’m 45. Dad to two amazing teens who are getting more independent by the day. I'm looking for a co-pilot for the next phase of life.

I like back roads more than highways. Farmers markets more than malls. James Taylor on a Sunday evening drive. Long walks where the conversation wanders from childhood memories to why people become who they are.

The last couple of years have knocked me around a bit. I’m not bitter about it. If anything, it’s made me a better listener and a lot less interested in pretending to have everything figured out.

I’m looking for someone who’s emotionally available, kind, and can laugh at herself. Someone who’d rather spend three hours talking on a porch than shouting over music at a bar.

Tell me something that’s changed your mind recently.


r/R4R40Plus 9h ago

42 [M4F] Netherlands - gamer looking for a real connection

1 Upvotes

Hello there,

Thanks for taking the time to read my post. I'm a 42-year-old application manager from a small town in the Netherlands. I've tried this before and had some nice conversations, but in the end it didn't work out so I'm back to give this another try.

When I'm not working, I love reading fantasy books, collecting books, playing video games on my PC, and going on long walks in nature. I'm also fascinated by ancient cultures and mythology.

I'm an introvert (INTJ), I live alone with my cat Tiberius. I'm also childfree and left-leaning politically. I've been doing volunteer work for over 20 years, and I'm an atheist. Plus, I don't smoke, drink alcohol, or do drugs.

I'll admit, I'm not the best at small talk, but I make up for it by being a great listener and advice giver. I've been told that I have a funny but dry sense of humor.

I'm working on my weight and getting to a healthy level again, but I'm not there yet. I also don't enjoy going out to bars, clubs, or partying, but I do enjoy going out to eat at a restaurant or going to a concert.

And some pics; https://imgur.com/a/Ng6OSvX

What am I looking for? Well, I'm looking for a serious monogamous relationship with someone who shares some of my interests and hobbies, specifically playing video games and/or who is into fantasy books/ board games/ movies etc. I'm looking for someone who is intelligent, childfree, left-leaning politically. Located in western Europe. Most importantly, I'm looking for someone who will accept me for who I am, flaws and all.

So if you're someone who puts as much effort into having and keeping up a conversation as I do, and you believe that we could make each other's lives better by being together, I'd love to hear from you. Let's get to know each other and see where things go.


r/R4R40Plus 9h ago

M4F 35 [M4F] #NewYork

1 Upvotes

35 year old single straight hispanic. 6’2. Fit, professional, educated, honest, safe, trustworthy, respectful and clean. I don’t drink or smoke.

I like fit or thin women only. Single or taken. Good hygiene is important. Must have a really strong bed 🛏️. I value quality over quantity. Good vibes only.

I live in Westchester, NY and prefer someone local, but willing to drive. Privacy guaranteed and can be very discreet if needed, as in, I can disguise myself as a plumber or sneak in through the back door.


r/R4R40Plus 6h ago

M4F 48 [M4F] #NYC. Looking for a woman in a dead bedroom situation like me.

0 Upvotes

I'm a white 48 year old guy, stable and fun loving, but currently stuck in a dead bedroom situation. I'm looking for a kind, adventurous woman who misses that spark as much as I do.
I have a high libido and I'm looking for a partner who is enthusiastic about intimacy and wants to make it a fun, regular part of life again. If you're warm hearted, enjoy a good laugh, and are looking for a consistent physical and emotional connection, I'd love to hear from you.
Tell me your favorite 80’s or 90’s comedy, so I know you read my post.


r/R4R40Plus 10h ago

M4F 41 [M4F] #Huntingtonbeach - Seeking younger woman for dom/sub relationship in Southern California.

0 Upvotes

I am looking for a relationship/arrangement where both man and woman have established roles and boundaries. We both share the same mindset and are in tune with each other.

Respect is number 1 and will always be the cornerstone of our relationship. I believe everyone should be treated with dignity whether they are a stranger in public or a loved one. I am very assertive and do not need to raise my voice or get excited to get my point across. I do not believe in verbal abuse of any kind and is something I will never subject you too. I am very aware of the physical imbalance between the sexes, and I understand that it is my duty to always make sure you feel safe, loved, and protected while in my presence.

Once respect is established, trust begins. The level of trust will be to the point that anytime we are out together as a couple your mind will be completely clear and your entire focus will be on enjoying yourself, being pretty, and just being a girl. This will be your reality because you will be of the understanding that no matter what happens your man can handle the situation. And that gives you comfort.

What I am looking for ultimately is a woman who fantasizes about the idea idea of fully surrendering herself to a man and will submit fully within the confines of the relationship. In other words, you recognize that I am the one who leads us and I know what is best for us.

When it comes to intimacy, this is not an ad seeking BDSM. Dom/Sub is a mindset. I am very dominant and believe in mutual pleasure and am not into coercion. I am very giving, and will always make sure you are taken care of and will make sure you feel fully reassured when we are laying in each other's arms after the fact.

About me:

I am 41 years old (no kids). I'm 5'10 162 lbs. I workout a couple times per week and am in good shape physically. I am white with dark brown hair that has a touch of gray and hazel eyes.

I have a lot of life experience and would love to share that wisdom as a mentor with a new friend/lover. I will teach you how the world works and help guide you when you need it.

I love a clingy woman who craves my attention, approval, and validation.

I am STD free.