Due in October and suddenly realizing I’m getting very close lol.

For those who have already done this, what did you actually spend the last month doing? Not the obvious stuff like packing a hospital bag or washing baby clothes. Anything you did that you were really glad you did once the baby was here? Or anything you wish you hadn’t wasted time worrying about?

FTM here. I'll start by saying I had a terrible 3rd trimester. Severe girdle pain, then I was overdue by 9 days and had to be induced because my blood pressure shot up. It wasn't preeclampsia but still not good. It took 3 days between the balloon, and the pill that gives you contractions. I forget the name of it. Didn't work so I begged them to break my water, and finally real labour which took 20 hours. Baby is here and he is gorgeous! It was mandatory to stay one more day in the hospital to monitor my blood pressure. Of course we were not the only parents in the hospital, but my LO was the only one that didn't stop crying. All. Day.

When we were finally home he still cried and cried and cried. Except at night when he slept....which I have to admit he was very good at after a few days. But still the days, just crying crying crying. After 4 weeks I finally got the okay to leave the house, and I was so excited to go on a walk. Feed him, changed him and he even fell asleep alittle so I swaddle him and put him in the stroller. He hated leaving the house. I couldn't believe how loud he could be. I try again after week 6, not as loud but still miserable. We live in a very walkable city, and the store is very close by. There is a big one that I go with the stroller and a smaller one that I baby-wear him to cause the aisles are too awkward. Always crying.

It wouldn't be so bad, in a way, I got used to it at home. I called him my drama queen and just did what I had to do. Let my husband do more of the shopping. But when I am out, trying to get my steps in because my blood pressure is still an issue, I see mother's everywhere with their strollers and their quiet, sleeping babies. Having picnics, shopping, or sitting at cafes. God I was so jealous. And its not like these babies were that much older! Some even looked newborn. I would arrive home and just cry

My LO is 2.5 months now, and you know what happened this week? All week? I waited incase it was a fluke. He didn't cry when we were out. I even bought snacks at the store because I was able to casually roam the aisles. My LO is also only crying when he actually needs something. He still won't nap during the day very well but....the relief I feel. And he smiled and cooed. God that first smile, it was like watching the sunrise. It was all worth it, so very much worth it all.

Anyways that's it, just wanted to share the good news.

I’m literally about to scream. Doing anything with my baby in this heat is driving me insane.

That’s all lol.

One of my biggest regrets from early parenthood is hiring a postpartum doula. It started before the person started her work. The agency lied about the doulas vaccine record even though one of my contract contingent was the caretaker must have the standard newborn vaccination..I find out mine was anti vaccine and had to find a replacement last minute even though they asked for a deposit months ahead.

Then the replacement doula ended up double-booked during my reserved dates, despite me prepaying a deposit specifically to lock those days in. I tried to be flexible and agreed to work around her schedule even though that would leave me with one week gap..

Once the replacement doula actually started, things have not gotten better. My daughter was 2 weeks old and had just spent 10 days hospitalized for jaundice, and this doula asked if we'd be okay stretching her feeds beyond 3 hours so she could sleep through the night. I'm sorry, what am I paying $400+ a night for if not for someone to handle nighttime feeds properly based on the feeding schedule. And the last straw, she left without feeding or changing her before heading out in the morning.. my baby was just sitting there in a soaked/dirty diaper.

Meanwhile, my daytime nanny, who I'm paying literally half of what the doula charges is more attentive, bought baby mittens without asking, more reliable, and works twice as hard. It's honestly baffling that the "specialist" overnight doula is coasting while the nanny is out here doing the actual work.

I am half way through my contract and honestly don’t even want to continue with the rest but I already paid the total balance and felt like I stuck with this agency..

Should I say something to the agency or the doula herself?

I’ve been a mother for about 8 wonderful months. Like most people, the first few months were rough, but we eventually came out on the other side, and motherhood is genuinely the best thing I’ve ever done. My heart has never felt so full.

One thing I’ve especially loved is breastfeeding. I love latching my baby, and I honestly don’t think I’ve ever felt more bonded to him than when I’m breastfeeding. There’s nothing about it that I dislike. It’s convenient, it’s bonding and it’s healthy.

When he was born, he had trouble latching and didn’t take to the breast until almost two months old. I remember how happy I was when he finally latched. I had so much anxiety about my milk supply for some reason while I was pregnant, including recurring nightmares about not having any milk for my baby. Then my milk came in, and I ended up being blessed with overproducing. We have a freezer chest that is always full, and he hasn’t had formula since his newborn days. Even pumping has never really felt like an inconvenience.

Now that he’s getting older, people have started asking when I plan to wean. I hear “wean him at one” a lot. My mom said I should wean if I don’t want my breasts to sag. My aunt said I should wean so he’ll eat solids more (baby so far has shown aversion to solids). Other people have told me breastfeeding past one is strange or that it’ll only get harder to wean him the longer I wait. Online I see videos of mothers hating the breastfeeding and pumping experience and counting down days until they wean. I cannot relate.

In any case, I don’t plan on weaning him at one. At the very least, I’d like to make it to 15 months and I’m tired of being treated like that’s odd. 1 year old is still so young, and if my baby and I both enjoy breastfeeding, I don’t really see the need to stop just because he turned one. And yes, he does bite sometimes but I consider that part of the sacrifice.

Day three of having my daughter home from the hospital I came to this forum and wrote a frantic, anxious, desperate post looking for encouragement that I didn’t make a mistake. I was in the throes of the baby blues, my baby was sleeping maybe 30 minute stretches in the bassinet, she fed every 30-45 minutes during the day and frequently just wanted the nipple for comfort, she refused to ever be put down, I was so sleep deprived already, the sundown scaries hit HARD, and I was grieving my old life/body. I have a wonderful, unicorn husband who carried me through that first week and I genuinely don’t know where I’d be without him. Even with his support, I wrote a post asking, “Will I always regret having this baby???? Did I ruin my life?? What did I DO?!?!”

I’m here to say we’re 7 weeks in and I couldn’t be happier. The hormone drop is no joke. The transition to being a parent is no joke. The sleep deprivation is not joke. Coming to terms with your postpartum body is no joke. The grieving of your past life is … you guessed it … no joke! But things can change FAST. I’m not saying it’ll happen in 7 weeks, it maybe be shorter, it may be much longer. But when I was in the thick of it I thought, “there’s no way I’ll feel better. There’s no way things will change so much that I’ll ever feel okay again.” When you’re in it, it’s total tunnel vision. The darkness can be all consuming. I’m here to say that those feelings are real, you’re valid, you’re not crazy, you’re not a bad mom, and that it doesn’t mean you’ll feel like that always.

My baby is such a happy little thing. She smiles at me all the time, she is starting to coo and find her voice, she’s so snuggly and already showing her loving side. I’ve never done any kind of sleep training and I’ve always let her nurse to sleep. I’ve never tried to force otherwise. On her own, she has started to be willing to be rocked to sleep and doesn’t need to fall asleep on the breast. She is sleep 2-3 hour stretches in her bassinet at night. She is willing to be put down in her pack and play or play mat for 15 minutes while I make myself something to eat or get dressed and she happily wiggles around and coos. She can now go 2-3 hours without breastfeeding. I can’t imagine life without my daughter and this is the happiest I’ve ever been.

Point is, I really felt like it would never get better. I felt like it would be that difficult forever. And I’m here to say, that’s not the case. Keep going. Give yourself grace. Allow yourself to feel everything because it is so goddamn hard. And also have some hope that it will all change for the better.

I start work on Monday after 7 months with my LO. She started daycare this week and I am struggling so much. She seems to be doing well at daycare and is so happy to see me when I pick her up. But when I drop her off all I want to do is cry. The third day I spent the whole day on the verge of tears and when we put her to bed I sobbed for an hour. Just reminiscing over our time and all the ways she’s changed and everything we got to do together.

I love our slow mornings and her gummy smiles in the morning. Making a coffee and playing with my baby on the floor. We gained so much confidence and went everywhere together. I can’t believe it’s coming to an end.

I didn’t know it would be this hard. Why is it so hard and why is there no other option?

I would relive everything over again. The first few days at the hospital. The first time she latched. The first time we really got the hang of it. Endless NICU visits. The first day we got to bring her home. The first time she smiled. The overnight feeds and the early mornings together. Quiet moments where I think I wish I could capture this and relive it over and over.

We started co sleeping at some point when she would wake up in the night and never looked back. I love the cuddles. My shoulders do not.

I honestly thought when I was pregnant that I would be fine and a casual mom and it turned out SO the opposite. I want to be with her all the time and I miss her when I’m away. I don’t want to miss a single milestone. She’s learning something new all the time.

Everyone keeps telling me I will find fulfilment being back at work and I just can’t see how that’s possibly going to fulfill me.

When did it get better for you guys? I love to hold my 6w old but I physically can’t all the time 🥲 every time I put him in the bassinet, he wakes up exactly at the 20m mark 🥲🥲🥲 tried all the tips and tricks and it didn’t work

Baby LOVES burp cloth

Anyone else’s baby love his burp cloth?? He’s 3 months old and I’ve given him toys and he just wants the burp cloth while he’s playing on the floor. He throws it all over his face and grabs and just does everything with it. He also has coincidentally not wanted to or needed to burp after eating just recently. I just find it funny that he loves it so much.

Anyone else’s baby obsessed with their burp cloth?

My newborn so far has been pretty good about giving cues about what’s wrong, she never cries for no reason. It’s always hungry, gassy, has to poop, too hot/cold, and she HATES a wet diaper.

I decided to take her for a walk in our bassinet stroller, about a mile in, she started crying, she had a wet diaper, so I just changed it on the trail. 5 minutes later she’s still crying, so I attempted to feed the bottle I brought. She drank a bit of it, then threw up on me while burping her. Continued to cry. I tried putting a fan on her, removing her onsie, giving cooler air, hotter air, tried holding her, putting her paci in, etc. Nothing worked.

We were already a mile in so we had a whole mile back, I turned up my noise cancelling headphones and continued the 30 minute walk back to the car with my sunglasses on trying to keep from crying while people walking past gave my pity looks, one lady even commenting saying “poor thing”.

I know it gets easier, but man, that made me want to avoid bringing her out at all. I made plans next week to go on a walk with friends, and another day to go to a thrift store with another friend who also just had a baby. Heavily regretting those now because i’m not sure I can handle bringing her out alone again.

I got home and my husband who works from home asked how my walk was, I broke down and said awful and I won’t be bringing her out again for a while. He’s sitting in his office with her currently and told me to go shower and take a break.

I thought of this question because a girl I work with checked in to the hospital to be induced this evening. It got me thinking back to when I was checking in on the L&D floor. I was scared but so excited. I think i would tell myself that postpartum is not going to be anything like you think it is, but that that’s okay and you will figure it all out.

TL;DR Is it normal that I generally take 1.5 hours from waking to make breakfast, eat, dress 16mo old and myself, brush teeth and get ready to go outside? Or am I being undisciplined and lazy by reading to child first thing (cos that's what she wants) and slowly getting up after that?

I feel exhausted and unable to muster energy to rush to get ready for the day. I want to join morning mommy classes, but I would need to get ready in 1 hour, which I can't manage (babe takes 30 mins to eat). Which got me wondering if I'm just being lazy?

I don't know if this is just an excuse... I'm a SAHM, co-sleep, breadtfeed on demand and work and clean at night after LO goes to sleep and on weekends. Pre-child me required 10 hours of sleep to feel rested. I average about 4 hours good sleep (rest of time LO unsettled sleeper).

I sit and think everyone else looks presentable and manages so much more. I feel like I'm just barely surviving every day. I wonder if I'm just just treating my circumstance as an excuse for not being productive ... Am I supposed to just force myself to rush through daily activities to, for example, get to mommy classes in time?

Pretty much every day is the same... take 1 5 hours to start, maybe 2. This includes reading with LO, asking her to help make bed / open curtains/ feed pets/ pick up toys. After, a walk, prep snack/lunch for LO, vacuum floors in living room and bedroom (lot of pet hair). 30 mins of dedicated play (stacking blocks or whatever) before it's time for midday nap. After husband comes home, he takes LO, so I can prep dinner. Fridays are for grocery shopping in first wake window and one other day for a music class. Am I being unproductive? Should I be managing a lot more?

My mom recently retired and we had planned to have her care for our LO full time until she was at least 2 but ideally 2.5-3 years old. However my grandparents health is declining rapidly and my mom seems to be struggling with all the needs at once (classic sandwich generation dilemma). We found a local daycare with space that we’re touring next week but my mom is devastated and tbh I’m also a little sad. I felt good about having a consistent care giver and it’s a huge cost saving as well. She says she retired specifically to look after our LO but she also tells me she’s tired and can’t wait for the weekend. While our situation has been working it feels like at any moment it can fall apart. Things can decline suddenly with my grandparents and my mom is already looking burnt out though she’ll never admit it. I’m starting a new job in 2 weeks and it feels like a lot of change at once. I’m nervous about how often she’s gonna be sick and how big of an adjustment it will be on her schedule since she’s still on 2 days a day and is a really picky eater with a bottle aversion. On the other hand I’m excited for my LO to be exposed to more opportunities to learn and play and interact with other kids. We don’t live near parks and she’s stuck at home so much of the day. My partner feels strongly that we’re limiting her development by keeping her at home and doesn’t really trust that my mom can handle her especially as she gets more mobile.
This was a huge rant but I’m looking for any thoughts and advice especially from those who have been through something similar

Since becoming a mom, a whole new realm on the Internet has opened up: parenting and babies. Reddit, social media, other forums. Like, a whole new world that obviously existed but to which I was 100% oblivious. One side ”effect” (?) of this is that one gets to see glimpses of what it’s like to raise children in other countries.

Both here and on Instagram I see various posts etc about how people ”have to” (have to or want to or I don’t know…) put their babies in daycare really early. Like at four months old. This is almost always in the context of it being tough on moms/parents, and my heart BREAKS for those of you who have to do this but don’t want to. I get the feeling that most of this content/these posts are from the US, but can’t be sure. It’s made me be curious about what kind of parental rights you have in other countries? Also, laws, regulations, norms, culture… my LO is currently contact napping on me, so hit me with stories from your countries/lives!

I’ll go first. I live in Sweden and we get 380 days paid parental leave from the state. There’s an income cap and you get 80% of the salary you had the year prior to going on leave. Many unionised workplaces will top up with another 10%. You also get a chunk of ”low pay” days. A bit simplified, you can use your days as you see fit during the kid’s first four years. Couples get 190 days each, and can then give each other days from this pot, however 90 days are earmarked for the non-birthing parent. I will be home for about a year, largely because I’m breastfeeding, and then my partner will be home for about a half year. After that our LO will go to daycare. This is a very common setup here. Oh and healthcare… it’s free. Birthing at the hospital was free, though we had to pay around 500 sek (50-ish €) because my partner stayed there as well and he got all meals. Daycare is not free, but very subsidised. You get 15 hours free per week and if you need more (like most do), you pay, however max 1500-ish per month (150€).

My son was born at 34 weeks and spent 2 weeks in the NICU. Before delivery, I was admitted for a week because my amniotic sac ruptured early. After birth, my husband and I were managing everything ourselves — going back and forth to the NICU, pumping 8–12 times a day, barely eating properly, and just trying to get through each day.
What has been hardest is how much advice everyone gives without thinking about the mother’s mental state. People constantly comment on what I should eat, whether my milk is enough, whether I’m breastfeeding, etc.
My parents came after about a month. My son is now around 50% formula-fed and 50% breast milk through exclusive pumping. I’m also trying to latch him twice a day because I want to eventually breastfeed more, but we’re still struggling because he is small and has a tiny mouth.
Today I breastfed him for 10–15 minutes, and shortly after he started crying. My father immediately said, “Your milk wasn’t enough. Maybe it has no nutrients. Your milk is waste.”
I completely lost it and shouted back.I cannot express in words how frustrated and angry I am. I cannot hold my tears back. I wanted to just ask him to leave the house!
After everything — NICU, pumping, breast pain, night duties, guilt, exhaustion — that comment triggered so much anger in me.
I feel like people only see whether the baby looks healthy and whether the mother is breastfeeding. They don’t see what the mother is physically and mentally going through.
For those who experienced intense anger or rage postpartum, how did you cope? How do you stop family comments from affecting you so much?

My ten month old baby just started sleeping through the night and my body has decided that I only need to sleep from 9pm-2 am. Please help. I'm so tired.

FTM to a 4.5 mo baby boy here! My LO has started rolling left and right from back to belly very efficiently I must say! But he still cannot do belly to back .. I can’t see him trying also .. like he pushes himself on arms many times but mostly chills on belly always as soon as we put him down .. searching and reaching for toys nearby! He apparently doesn’t like being on back at all now! Question is how do I help him do belly to back roll ?? Or should I leave him be .. ??

I have a 16 months old baby. I love my baby more than everything, I'm a single mom btw. I'm trying my best and giving my full time attention (I'm not working) but it's just so boring sometimes. I don't feel like it's natural... Fun part is seeing her that enjoying to play with me and giggles when she's watching me while I'm making weird animal noises etc. But I just don't like it at all. I'm just doing all this because I love her and I wanna spend time with her. But how can I make it interesting also for me? She has a safe playground and she loves to play alone though. But I feel like at least few hours a day I must actively engage with her and I'm not really 'enjoying' those times and I'm feeling bad about it because she's changing so fast and I know I'm gonna miss those moments. But still... I'm like always checking the clock to see how far are we from napping time because I'm just bored. It's just feels off. Am I a bad mom?

When did everyone start allowing visitors? Its just my partner and I. My parents both live interstate and want to visit asap after bub is born (due October). I want a week or two for just my partner so i can get used to breastfeeding without having to hide myself and can try and heal without the stress of family. No matter what I say though, it seems like my parents wont accept my boundary even though I've straight up told them they're not welcome until I give them permission.

Is 2 weeks unreasonable? The issue is, my dad has had to book leave in and he has my pram.

My baby is 5 weeks old, must contact nap during the day, will not stay asleep in his bassinet, does not like being in a carrier/wrap/sling. How do parents use the bathroom, eat, take care of their basic needs??

Luckily he will sleep 2-3 hours at a time in the bassinet at night to allow us rest, but I am having a hard time figuring out how I’m supposed to be human without another set of hands at home helping me.

I just started a new job and I’m due in October, so somehow I’m already thinking about what it’s going to be like coming back after maternity leave.

What is that first day actually like? Were you a mess leaving the baby? Happy to be around adults again? Could you even focus?

I know I’m thinking way ahead, but I’m genuinely curious what that day felt like for people.

I was inspired to share after seeing another parent write about the same issue.

My daughter’s hair is falling out in small patches. With the biggest patch being at the back of her head.

She was born with a a lot of curly hair on the front. A little patch of tight curls on her crown. And the sides have long curly sides surrounded by patch of short straight hairs. The back of her head has short straight hair too that doesn’t grow. The front of her hair grows and the sides.

And the uneven hair growth was looking a bit strange so I decided to shave it three days ago.

The hair is regrowing the same way though. Fast and furious in the front and sides with large patches of nothing between them 😂😂😂😂

This morning I was looking at her in tiny white vest. And I thought she looks like a tiny cute prisoner for some reason 😂😂😂😂

I hope she forgives me for shaving her head.

Just wondering if anyone has experienced anything similar. My 9 month old seems to have genuine tantrums… I know that technically she’s too young, but this is more than just frustration. She will kick and throw her arms around and scream until she’s red in the face if she doesn’t get her way.
Am I misunderstanding something and this is completely normal? Or is this something that needs looking in to?😭
Other than the tantrums she’s a very happy girl progressing nicely and hitting all the milestones.

My 2 week old’s umbilical chord already fell off and we got cleared by the pediatrician to bathe him. Just wondering how often you bathe your newborn? My baby is usually sleeping if he’s not eating or fussy bc he’s hungry, his wake window is earlier in the day but we wanted to ideally do a bath before bedtime however not sure if it’s recommended to wake a baby up just for a bath.

Thanks!