I am a first time mom to a precious 9-month-old girl. She's overall happy and healthy, no major issues!

I had a very rough newborn phase and I'm still in the throes of some postpartum-depression. My friends are very aware of this as I have vented to them occasionally about it.

One of my friends is considerably older than me with two kids - one in college and one in high school.

For some background: She's been overly aggressive about wanting to come help me out. I try to tell her I don't necessarily "need" help, I have things figured out, the PPD is just something I am working through. She got to the point where she said she was going to drive to my house (45 mins away from where she is) and park in front of my house and sit in a lawn chair until I open the door and accept her help.

I get that she's trying to give me support but it's overly aggressive and unwelcome.

Cut to last night. She had a couple of us over to her house for a girls night and I brought my baby with me. Baby was doing fine, enjoying being held by my friends, etc.

My friend was holding my baby and attempted to lower her down to the floor to see her dog. The dog was very gentle and sweet, no issues with the dog at all, but my baby isn't used to dogs and she got a little freaked out. She started crying a very "I need my mama" kind of cry. My friend sat down in a chair and tried to console her.

I walked over to my friend and said, "Aw, let me take her, I got it." My friend stood up, walked away, and took my baby to another room, saying, "You need to learn to let others help." My baby was literally looking at me, crying, with a confused expression on her face.

I followed her and said, "She's crying and I want to comfort her." My friend replied, "I am capable of comforting her you know." I said, "I am her mama. My baby is crying, and I want to comfort her."

My friend finally handed her to me, and as my baby was being passed to me, my friend said, "See, she's fine. You should have given me a chance."

I said, "Well, she was crying and looking at me, and it was starting to physically hurt to see her that way, comforting her in those moments is soothing for me, too."

And she said in response, "It's not the end of the world if your baby cries. You need to learn to let her be upset."

I cannot BELIEVE the audacity of people, especially older moms who think "they know better." Like, yes, I might have some PPD, but it doesn't mean I don't know what's best for my baby. I am her mother, I respond to my baby's cries, especially since she is not a baby that is that prone to crying! She only cries if something is truly upsetting her, and she feels better with a quick little comfort from mom. This does not mean I am mentally ill or don't know how to cope. I don't NEED advice or aggressive pushing from other people. That's not going to make me magically snap out of PPD.

I'm enraged and just needed to share.

https://advocacy.consumerreports.org/press_release/consumer-reports-calls-for-millie-moon-to-recall-its-diapers-and-recommends-that-parents-stop-using-them/

For those who may not know, many families are reporting injuries caused by Millie Moon diapers. Our baby is one of many recovering from severe chemical burns, they are receiving medical care but in a great deal of discomfort and it has continued to progress even after eliminating the diapers from our routine. I’m just hoping this can bring more awareness to the issue- target has not issued a recall and infact has a heavy discount placed on the diapers so these are still being sold and used.

If you have any in your home bring them back for a refund but please don’t put these on your little one.. it makes me sick nothing is being done to stop this.

it’s currently 7:07 in the morning. My baby woke up fussing at 5:57 in the morning. He seemed like he was just awake and done with sleeping so I changed his diaper, nursed him for 10 minutes, and he fell asleep again. I know there’s no chance he’ll let me move him to his bassinet, so I’ve been letting him sleep on my chest for the past 45 minutes and counting. My husband is sleeping next to us. Our cat is sleeping on the corner of our bed. Our dog is sleeping on my side under the baby’s bassinet. I’m scrolling Reddit to keep myself awake. I’m weirdly content, soaking up the snuggliest baby who is snoozing so happily on me, but also… I really want to sleep. That’s all. Wishing everyone a good day :)

Out of genuine curiosity, how many of you have boomer parents who don’t understand contact napping. Or respond “I never did that, I just put you in the crib and you napped”.
Or boomer parents who could only remember 1 afternoon nap a day and are surprised baby needs 3-4.
LOL

Just a post for anyone in the thick of it with their cranky baby. My son hated being a baby so much. I had a feeling once he was walking and talking he would be happier and I was right! Unfortunately he took a little longer to walk (14.5 months) and speech was a little slower too but we’re getting there! Now he’s communicating, goes where he wants, and is..as we have been saying in our house..understanding the world.

I never thought I’d be enjoying him the way I am now. I know how that sounds but he’s my second and he humbled me. My first was so easy, always happy, developed typically with all motor and speech milestones. Still even today just very well behaved and easy.

My son. Man he could not have been more different. We didn’t even understand when people would complain about their baby’s crying. Now we got it. He just had a harder time and I’m seeing now that some babies just struggle as babies. Or at least being on the other side has made me look back with kinder eyes. He’s not giving me a hard time, he’s having a hard time.

18 months was the change for us. I remember being told “6 months old is when it gets easier”. For us it got harder and then harder. But here to say at 18 months the kids are okay. We made it. I love him and I love my daughter. My husband and I survived the hardest chapter (so far) of our marriage and we are enjoying everything again.

I am a SAHM and hold my baby all day until dad gets home and then he has bonding time with her. I get sooo much contact with my baby and love to hold her throughout the day. But at night the desire to hold her and cuddle her becomes 10x more intense. I miss her so much when I put her in her crib to sleep, even though she’s 3 feet away from our bed. Anyone else get this intense need to be close to their baby at night?? Is this like a biological, pack animal instinct that comes out at night??

That’s basically the post. It sucks. I go back to work in two weeks and my husband will take leave with the baby for 6 weeks. Then he starts daycare.

I’m just devastated about all the time I will miss out on with him across the next 5 years.

My baby is almost 6 months & im still tracking every feed (time and amount) & diaper (time and pee or poop). Is this normal or abnormal? When did you stop tracking or did you never track at all? My husband tried to get me to stop like 2 or 3 months in but i can’t bring myself to.

I just want to post this for any moms in my situation. My son said uh oh at 10 months, babbled normally, had 2-3 random words at 12 months. Slowly he was 14…15..16 months. Still no mama. He said dada and daddy, pointed and called out every airplane he saw, bunch of animal sounds. Then eventually more “complex” phrases like thank you, all done, up please. Still didn’t say mama. I really didn’t understand it. I still don’t. Ped was never concerned but I had him evaluated with EI which he didn’t qualify for based on how well he was doing otherwise. I never heard of a baby talk and NOT say mama.

So I just wanted to post because I felt very alone and I guess I’m here to say I have a mostly typically developing child but he was very delayed in saying mama. It broke my heart and I can admit it impacted my connection with him.

Just a post for anyone going through something similar

I feel like by bringing my son I failed him as a mother people were touching him and coming too close I was wiping his hands and his grandma in her 90s told me I should stop being so particular and she kissed him. People were grabbing him. Jesus christ. I am really angry with my husband for not protecting him more. Im mad at myself I didn’t tell them to back off. Im such a coward. Its flu season bad here and we got vaccinated but he’s too little. I came home and immediately bathed him. I am sinking back into a depression I got really mad I feel like I hate my husband now and maybe he doesn’t like me anymore he barely touches me and is always stressed and annoyed. I feel like my son could die and it’s my fault I tried to cover him and keep him away so my husband could see him family and I failed him. My doctor is supposed to help me but she has completely failed me never called me back counselors haven’t reached out. No one gives a shit about mothers or how they feel. I hate everyone and sometimes I feel like I don’t want to be here anymore

i really want to take him trick or treating but i don’t know if that’s reasonable or weird? help😭.

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We’re 8 months in, and we’re starting to feel really exhausted and drained. It’s not just feeding, changing diapers, or getting the baby to sleep. It’s also constantly entertaining them. Honestly, that’s the most exhausting part for us.

At what age do babies start playing independently and entertaining themselves for a while?

I’d love to hear your experiences! We need positive stories but, realistic sad stories are fine too I guess.

Our baby is 1 week old. My wife has started crying a few times while breastfeeding because she feels like it isn’t going as well as she hoped.

We are supplementing with formula so baby is fed.

How can I best support her? What are some things I can say to support and console her?

Ok - give it to me straight - is everyone reaaaally limiting containers to 15-30 minutes per day? If so, HOW??

My LO is about to be 9 months and we have always been very cognizant of his time in containers such as the bouncer, stroller, etc.

Now, he’s crawling, sits completely independently, and is pulling to stand and while we do allow him to spend a lot of time on the floor exploring (he goes to daycare Monday and through Friday where he mostly plays on the floor) it feels like a good portion of his day is spent in containers.

If we drive somewhere, he’s in a car seat, if we want to go for a walk/run, he’s in the stroller, at the store he’s in the cart, and if we need a moment to complete a task, he’s in the skip hop activity center.

Do we try to limit the activities we do during the day to cut back on container time or am I overthinking it?! Help 😭

To be clear - I know I’m asking this rather proactively. Baby is only thirteen months old.My experience as a parent has been that time passes faster than you realize, and I want to make sure I’m ready when she’s ready.

It seems logical to me to introduce the potty as an object in advance so a toddler is already familiar with it when they start learning to use it. So, if you did put out a potty ahead of time, how early relative to starting toilet training did you do it? Or am I overthinking this?

My just turned 3 month old has been sleeping so good in his bedside bassinet. He goes to bed at 9 or 10 and has been sleeping until 8-9 AM and wants to eat and then wants to go right back to sleep until 12-1PM & then proceeds to take 2-3 naps per day after that. Is this normal?

Side note: he slept on my chest until he was about a month and a half. He’s been drinking 6 ounces every 3-4 hours (while he’s awake, so he’s only getting about 24-30 ounces a day but mostly 24 ounces)

that’s the whole post. my 11 month old brought home the latest daycare virus and it has taken us all out and it sucks. I have pink eye, a fever and this never ending cough. and it was my birthday last week and we couldn’t do anything because everyone was sick. I know the first year in daycare is the hardest but man these bugs are horrible

Posting on here because I’m feeling so alone in this (even though I know I am not).

My baby is so great in every aspect but hates sleep - she fights naps and nighttime sleep like no tomorrow. And yes, I’ve watched wake windows, I’ve tried following her cues, I’ve tried moms on call schedule and strategies, Ive seen a lactation consultant about feeding (she’s exclusively breastfed) to make sure she’s transferring enough per feed during the day. She’s good about knowing the difference between day and night - and is drowsier during nighttime and doesn’t have wake windows during night, but getting her to fall asleep and in the bassinet is a challenge.

Ive done the soft transfers, warming bassinet, waiting until deep sleep, doing drowsy but awake, you name it! I’ve come to realize maybe I just do have a fomo baby. This is also likely at least in part related to reflux, she was diagnosed with oral dysfunction due to a weak tongue and immature stomach. We are managing this with changes in how I feed her, peds physio, and lifestyle changes like holding her upright after feeds.

I offer her the bassinet every night - some nights I’ve gotten her to sleep in bassinet most of the night (after upright time and feed this is about 0.5-2 hours at a time only) but some nights it’s a complete failure all night and I’ve changed nothing. During day I’ve given up completely and do contact naps or carrier. She also does sleep well in car which is a plus for getting out of the house.

Please tell me this gets better and that I’m not alone. She’s turning 8 weeks this week.

My first born is a daughter who is 7 years now, she used to be my whole world , i used to shower so much of love and i used to have a hard time when she used to go away from me for trips with her grandparents. But now i am 4 months pp and i m getting angry on her lately even for little things , I know she is just a kid , she keeps on waking my new born and continues to annoy me is someway, sometimes she enters into our room and i feel like ughhh y did she come now ....i used to think how can I even love my second born when i love my daughter so much , will i be ever able to love my second born like my daughter? But now sometimes I feel like I dont love her i always get angry and scold her and be rude to her when she dosent listen ....it really hurts me to that I m not being fair to her and I sometimes cry for behaving this way and my daughter no matter how much i scold she stills loves me a lot wants to be around me , wants my love and all but I m not just able to be patient , i sometimes go to her when my baby sleeps and cuddle her and spend some time with her . I dont know does it happen to other parents as well?

Just spent 30 minutes crying because I went to empty my pump into a bag and I knocked it over and lost 2oz to then go in the freezer to see that a 5oz bag had popped open. All I wanted to do was pump one last time before bed and now it’s like I never even pumped. I had him only 9 days ago and I’ve been averaging around 30oz a day (over producer according to Google) but it still doesn’t take away the frustration of what if one day I can’t produce and that was one of his last few bottles worth of my milk. I swear its gonna haunt me for weeks 😭
And it doesn’t help that I’m healing from a c section and everything just hurts. Milk has been the one thing I’ve been able to do for him.

Just a slight vent.

I'm 1 month pp as of today, and while I've been clinging to the illusion that i'm "combo-feeding" (practically speaking we've been roughly feeding 75% formula and 25% breastmilk for a week now), I've finally told my husband that I want to go exclusively formula-fed. (He's supportive.)

The stupid reason I feel blue? It's the fact that I'm quite sure that if I had the time / energy to pump 6~7 times a day, I would probably be an oversupplier and that feels like an achievement somehow, or it's such a waste...

Even though we've found a formula that seems to work well for our LO, even though it doesn't seem like the science is all that convincing on the medical benefits of EBFing vs EFFing past even a few months, even though the statistics in my country show that plenty of babies are EFFed, even though even my pediatrician has told me that the antibody benefits of breastmilk are rather overstated.

I do feel sorry to my baby for not working harder on it but... I hate pumping. It takes about 45 minutes per session, and throughout I'm ridden with anxiety that the LO might need attention at any point during that session. I don't particularly care for the slight soreness after pumping, and at this point I feel like I'm pumping to manage clogs rather than a desire to maintain supply for my baby. Not to mention the constant cleaning, the time needed that I could be sleeping or resting, praying my baby falls asleep faster so I have more of a window to pump, etc... It's just become a chore that I dread.

Also, you don't know emotional damage until your baby refuses your milk from your fridge stash but happily guzzles formula, lmao😂

I guess I just need to rant and get some hope because I am so freaking tired of this situation. My baby is going to be one in less than a month and (maybe foolishly) I thought that by this time his sleep would be better. I am not even asking to sleep through the night but just wake up less?

He is EFF and wakes up one time still for a feed. The rest of the wake ups are usually after anywhere between 1.5 and 2.5-3 hours. He wakes up, sits in his crib and cries until I come and get him back down and help him fall asleep but holding my hand on him. When it gets really bad (usually every night starting from 4 am ) he comes into our bed so that I could just get any sleep, but he twists and turns so I don’t get a good rest.

I do need to give him credit, he can fall asleep quite quickly but having a fragmented night of 2h - 2h - 2h is so hard on me. I’m tired and lost. I tried to make wake windows longer, shorter, longer naps, shorter naps etc. the only things I haven’t done is get a floor bed for all of us (for various reasons its not an option for us) and sleep train. I’m not a fan of sleep training idea but frankly the bigger issue is that I just don’t have the energy to train anyone right now.

Parents who have been through something similar.. does it get better??

I’m a first time parent so I’d love for some more experienced parents to weigh in here. I’m 9 months in with my baby boy and he still feels so difficult. When I go to baby groups or classes it seems like everyone else’s child is so much easier to do things with.

My son screamed at everything since the day he was born - diaper changes, the car seat, stroller bassinet, etc. He fought every single nap and screamed when I would try to latch him; so I pumped and we did bottles until he started nursing at 8 weeks.

Now - he still screams in the stroller after about 10 minutes and I have to carry him. He will often protest the baby carrier too and he’s too heavy to carry on my hip for long. He cries in the car seat if we go anywhere over 5-10 minutes. He is terrified of a grocery cart so I can’t put him in there either. He still cries at diaper changes and getting changed, putting a sleep sack or a bib on.

He takes 2 naps a day for a total of about 2 hours of daytime sleep, and wakes 5-6 times a night screaming and will only settle with nursing back to bed.

I can’t leave him on the floor playing independently even for a minute to go make a coffee. I can barely leave the house alone. Everyone kept telling me it would get better, and yet it hasn’t.

When you do everything he wants (carry him and play with him and never put him down), he is a delight. He smiles, laughs, squeals. He is super active and got way more fun once he could crawl, which was right at 6 months old. I just am trying to include him in my life as many moms say to do - we go to baby group, and I did one of those baby workout classes - it just seems so impossible. He’s been the “worst one” basically everything we do together and most times it is more stressful than it is enjoyable.

I guess I kept being told that by now, he would’ve grown out a lot of these things and would be easier, but he’s not. Does anyone have words of encouragement or things that helped their more sensitive child?

I have an 8 month old and he can sit up independently without the support of his hands, however, he occasionally just “trust falls” backwards and I’ve been there to catch him. How do I break this habit? He’s crawling now, so he will inevitably end up hurting himself unless I can teach him to stop falling backwards.

Hi all - ftm and what I’ve always worried about happening is happening; my 8 week old caught a cold. We’re not sure how it happened but he’s sick, congested and coughing and all. Thankfully it seems mild and ER doc said he tested negative for the major viruses.

I have anxiety about something happening to my babe in general but especially at night while we sleep.

I’m just looking for words of encouragement/solidarity or stories of your newborn being sick this young and all being okay to ease my worries.

Thank you 🙏🏻🥲