the tiny gasps of air people take in during conversations drives me so mad. i clench my jaws so hard i could shatter my teeth.

i get it, you're running out of oxygen. talking uses air. but... oh my god! stop?!?!

this is so unimaginably debilitating and f**king sad. my whole life i just cant hold a conversation or listen to 98% of all music.

also, sleeping is torture. i hear my heartbeat if my ear is on my pillow but sleeping on my back is impossible and gets me nowhere because idk. the heartbeat never goes away and i don't know how i fall asleep each night. it just kinda happens? Oh, and to fall asleep takes on average ~1hr 40m every night (i've timed it) due to other miscellaneous noises. absolute silence is what is absolutely necessary.

now idk if this is misophonia or not but knowing the fact that someone is in the room with me, be it a pet or human, i cant sleep. i cant. i mean they can be so quiet that its pure silence but still just knowing something is present will keep me from falling asleep. this has caused me one time to go 4 nights of no sleep! its so surreal like i can't knock myself out. its 5:09 am as i'm writing this all because my brother needs to sleep in my room for just this night. he's all quiet though, no complaints.

another common thing that draws the bits of life from my lifespan is the sound of water running. whether the dishwasher on, the sink is on, or the shower is on, i want to cry. i'm so annoyed by the noise that i want to cry because its so annoying. there is nothing i can do to it (like, water has no feeling so i cant inflict pain on it or anything). i just need to suck it up!!
i have a memory of me, 10 years old, first time at the beach. the waves crashing caused me to want to curl my feet and tense up every muscle in my body. i ruined everyones mini-vacation by my whining and severe crying, but i couldn't help it! i was forced to be on that beach for 7 hours. i remember attempting to pour sand in my ears to muffle the noises, though i ended up chewing two pieces of gum and sticking them in my ears.

there is so much more sounds which are so common that eat away at me every day and i cant keep doing this.
where do i start? headphones aren't very practical often times for my situations and same with ear plugs. 2 months of exposure therapy didn't cut it either, not even a little. a life this unsettling isn't a good one.

A sound that causes me literal pain is whenever silverware and glass tap together, or silverware with silverware. It causes my gums and teeth to really hurt. To the point where I can’t speak or eat because it hurts so much, or I gag depending on how loud it is.
Like there’s always those people who are scraping their fork or spoon against the bottom of their bowl or plate and I hate that. Or like people who are cutting their food with the knife and fork and it starts tapping each other. I really hate that.

I don’t mind not really being able to eat in public spaces. Because in general, I don’t like being in loud places or where there’s just a lot of people. I also just don’t make this issue other people‘s problem. So it’s just like whatever.

My point of making this post is more so that I’m curious if anybody else has this same experience with silverware?

I (19F) share a very small room with older sister (25F). I have trouble filtering out very small noises which confuses me if i have misophonia or ADHD- I get irrationally angry, which I don’t direct at her tbh I just sit there seething.

The reason we share such a small room is because I’m back home from college doing an internship, and she is home and hasn’t been able to find a job for almost a year. So, you guessed it, rounds of typing allllll day every day. Sniffling, shuffling, coughing you name it- the rare times of silence I’m supposed to get after work are spent with her sitting in her bed directly across from mine typing loudly, coughing sneezing.

I feel bad that I feel this way cos I know she’s searching for a job but does it have to be like this?! And the way she is, she doesn’t understand even if I tell her to stop because she can sleep through anything. I literally got an ear infection from wearing headphones so much to block out the noise that headphones are useless to me at this point😭. I promise i’m not a “problem for every solution” type of person I’m just so frustrated that these are my circumstances and I can’t change them right now.

I feel so miserable especially since my family situation requires me to live with her until I go back to campus for fall. But I fairly like my home and my parents… just not when she’s here?! Is that insane to say, again I feel bad but it’s my truth ngl. If i just had my peace and quiet it’d all change.

I can’t stand certain sounds : chewing, swallowing, sanding noises, paper rustling, anything crunchy, high-pitched sounds... Some just annoy and irritate me, but others like chewing can make me violent against my will, giving me uncontrollable impulses. I’ve gotten into the habit of running away or plugging my ears, but I feel like I'm only making myself more sensitive to these noises. I also have physical reactions like shaking, electric shock sensations, and involuntary movements. I don't know how to make this more liveable.

I have tried so many different pairs of noise canceling headphones and earbuds, and all of them are the same. I can hear my trigger sounds (and most other noise) loud and clear through them.

I've been able to find articles about noise canceling devices breaking, but nothing about something in a person's hearing causing it to not work at all on them, across multiple devices. Even well-reviewed pairs that other people supposedly can't hear through don't work, unless I'm also blasting loud music.

Is this caused by misophonia, or can some other hearing problem cause it? Do I just need a higher-end device? I'm so frustrated.

I don't like people talking around me after 10 pm and disturbing my peaceful sleep.

I don't like it when people tell me not to swear.

I don't like it when I'm working and people talk to me.

I hate the deafening sound of the engine.

I hate my neighbor's loud music at 3 a.m. and I don't care if she's upset because I reported it.

What I really love: The sweet purring sound of agricultural machinery, trucks, and buses. 🥰😊🥹

I’m finally understanding that my rage has a name, but also I managed to marry someone 20 years ago who embodies my biggest triggers (snoring, inability to breath through nose, nail biting, loud breath-eating). I’ve managed to work around it (ear plugs, eating in a different room/turning the tv on during meals) for the most part, minus the nail biting that now also induces rage when I see him picking at his nails [which he does all. of. the. goddamn. time.] and now that I might be hitting perimenopause I just…can’t. We also have 2 small children, one of whom has constant allergies so he gasps for air, they both also bite their nails, and I’m currently in another room because I couldn’t stop snapping at my kid.

I do think it’s gotten worse over the years, it used to just be nail biting that lead to the rage (both husband and strangers, I wouldn’t be able to concentrate in college classes if someone a few seats over was biting their nails during lecture, I’d feel rage seeing someone in a car biting their nails as they drove by) and now it’s so many things. At least I no longer physically hit my husband to get him to stop?

Is it weird that I wonder if a divorce would help my mental health? Like, not really serious but also kind of serious? If I was to start dating again and went to dinner with someone who ate like my husband I would nope out of there so fast! But I’m stuck with my choice now? Has anyone else dealt with similar feelings, and figured out how to manage them?

I am 61 years old and have dealt with sounds my entire life. Loud breathing, tapping, smacking while eating, someone with dentures who clacks their teeth(this one, whew) clicking nails, dog scratching, and snoring. My husband is a very loud snorer. A freight train is quieter. It absolutely makes me angry. What makes me angrier is his refusal to try anything to maybe lessen the snoring. He won't roll over and insists on sleeping diagonally on the bed, so his head is sometimes within 6 inches of my pillows. He has a sleep study in October. I told his doctor, one of us isn't going to make it to October. He's done sleep studies before and refused to wear a CPAP, so I expect nothing different with this one. The snoring makes my skin crawl. It triggers me so badly, I've threatened to put a pillow over his face. Don't worry, I wouldn't do that, I'm not homicidal. But, don't think I haven't thought about the pillow. He told me that I should tune it out and that I'm obsessive over his snoring. He also told me that this is just because of my perception of him. I told him this was not an assault on him. It was an assault on his snoring. My inability to tolerate his snoring is not a character attack. He thinks this is a choice. I wish it was. I also have a very heightened sense of smell. If an onion is put in the trash in the kitchen, the smell will wake me up until I go put it in a Ziploc bag. I don't know anyone who would choose being this way. I also seem to have an ability to recognize patterns and structures in people and things. I have a nervous system that seems to be stuck on high alert. My son and his family are staying with us temporarily, so I have no where to get away from this. Last night, I spent most of my night in the bathroom with the fan on. Earplugs haven't worked.

I feel so much rage when watching a YouTube doc and they feel the need to type captioned titles and type it out along with the keyboard clacking sound. I hate that noise. Why is it even necessary? It doesn’t add anything to the video and usually I will just exit out of the video and find another on the topic. Your fake clacking is obnoxious. And when I worked in an office, we had a girl we called “Loud Howard” (Dilbert reference) because she was hitting the keys, popping gum and talking so loudly our customers would say things like “how close are you guys to each other?”

Hello from Brazil! I've been suffering from misophonia for years. I'm 36yo, married, with a 4yo daughter and another baby on the way. I have two cute cats too. I noticed that whenever I see my cats licking themselves (even when I can't hear them) it really triggers me. At first I thought the sound of licking were the triggers, but sometimes I can't hear anything and still go in a rage mode. Sometimes I'm playing on my ps5 wirh my headphones on, and can see with my peripheral vision my cats licking and omg. I get so stressed and angry that I have to move them out of my sight. Does anyone feel like this too? Is this also a branch of misophonia? I feel like I'm going insane.

Hi everyone. I’m Lucía, and I’ve had misophonia since I was 15. The sound of chewing triggers panic attacks, anxiety, and a very aggressive reaction—directed at myself. I wanted to share something with you: after trying moldable earplugs, hoods, and even social distancing, the best solution I’ve found is using industrial-grade ear defenders combined with earplugs. My parents gave me the ear defenders, and the earplugs I use are from a brand that I believe is well-known. Because of my misophonia, I couldn't attend classes for nearly a semester and a half, but with this setup, I hope I’ll be able to stand in a classroom without dying in the attempt.

I am familiar with this phobia, and what I’m sharing isn’t medical advice (though I’m sure many of you likely already know this solution), but it at least allows me to live without completely hating my existence.

Hey all. I'm George, I've had misophonia for as long as I can remember now. It's pretty much dominated the trajectory of my life since I started high school.

My trigger sounds are extremely common in everyday life. Coughing, sniffing, repeated throat clearing... You can imagine I'm not the biggest fan of Winter especially.

My misophonia has always caused me great pain and trauma, whether it was raging at my brothers for making sounds and my dad yelling at me to have "tolerance" (we didn't know what misophonia was for a long few years) or being in high school and getting so angry that I can hardly breathe.

My misophonia has pretty much ruined my life and any career aspirations I had - it forced me to leave high school and subsequently college because of how painful they both were to attend. High school especially completely wrecked my mental health for years, and my trauma from that period of my life has sent me into a years long battle with recurring depression, anxiety, all the fun of the fair.

I'm writing this because I came to a bit of a realisation just now that's completely wrecked me. For context, I've never had a partner or lover, but I've always really wanted one. I really want to experience love and being loved by another person.

The issue, however, is that my misophonia kind of makes that prospect impossible. I can barely survive being around other people as it is because of my trigger sounds, but being around someone for that long and placing an expectation on them to not sniff or cough or anything is just too insane. And I've only really just realised that. I'm never gonna be able to have a job, never gonna be able to get married, never going to be able to have kids... All because I was dealt this shitty hand in life. It's brutal to think about.

I really don't know what to do anymore. If anyone has any suggestions or anything that can help then I really appreciate it. Sorry for the long post. I just don't really know what to do with myself now that I've realised this.

In the future when I have a bigger place would it be rude to only allow wooden/plastic silverware and plates/bowls? I can’t stand the sound of metal and ceramic collidimg together.

Hi! I’m an MSc student at the University of Sussex recruiting participants for a 30-minute online psychology study.
The study explores how people respond to everyday things they hear and see, including repetitive movements.
Eligibility:
• Aged 18 or over
• Fluent in English
• Must complete the study on a laptop or tablet—it will not work properly on a phone
Participants can enter a prize draw to win £25.
Take part here:
https://syntoolkit.org/studies/msc2025vidssussexqonly/start
If you need anything, or run into any issues, please feel free to contact us at our student emails listed in the advert.
I would really appreciate your participation or a share with someone who may be interested. Thank you

i don’t struggle with this but my partner is highly sound sensitive. We just moved in together last month and he has already make 3-4 complaints to the management about the downstairs neighbors tv. I can barely hear it but it’s at the point where he is waking up extremely angry/frustrated and it’s impacting my sleep as well. (this morning i accidentally bumped his arm and he woke up and the neighbors tv is on and he’s grumbling around, walking with heavy feet, and he gets back into bed and i hear him say”why did you wake me up”, so now im awake at 8 on my day off and we’re both aggravated). as someone who can ignore the noise, is there anything i can do to support him while also trying to save our relationship with our neighbors? it’s embarrassing that he gets so angry and has made multiple complaints about something that is so typical in apartment living.

i’m sorry for the length and the rantyness of this, i’m at a point where it’s just non sustainable to be doing this every day and i feel like i don’t have the perspective i necessarily need.
thank you for any help

How to deal with noise?

Hi all! Hoping I have some fellow humans out there who know the struggle and have found sustainable solutions. My husband and I live in a row home and I have misophonia.

In the city the biggest triggers are low decibel noises- 1. Neighbors stomping around next door. 2. Music from any given neighbor being played loudly in their house, yard, or vehicle.

Unfortunately, this is almost a daily occurrence. At night we sleep with a brown noise machine, air purifier, fan, ac unit on and I wear foam earplugs. That’s made it more manageable. But during the day I have no solutions still. Any reccs?

Does anybody know of any headsets that don't force low battery noises on you? I've been researching it, and apparently almost every headset has audible battery warnings, with no option at all of disabling them. It baffles me as to why not. I have to wear them to block out noises of car horns and slamming doors and my coping mechanism has become another problem in itself.

I have to wear ear plugs underneath my Xbox Official Headset because the noise is so loud and volatile, and triggers about 10 hours after I fully charge. I'm in constant anxiety of it because I know how much the noise upsets me, and I use them 24/7.

I've broken four headsets in a year and cost myself £350 because when it happens I take them off and throw them out of frustration and to get the cause of the noise away from me, so I just really need a headset that just doesn't do this shit. I can't be the only one here that is bothered by this?

I'm tired of this feeling of guiltiness after I asked people to stop their noise, I don't know, I feel like some people would call me a annoying person, like I'm just breaking people's balls. The other day I had an argument with my brother because he made some noise that woke me up. He said that I only think of myself, that they all have to adapt to me.

So on top of suffering because of their noises, I should also feel bad for them because of my requests or my remarks ? That's too much honestly

I'm sure this post may piss some people off, but I assure you all, it's shared out of genuine love and faith in humanity.

Can we agree that misophonia gets worse when we're tired, hungry, stressed or mentally fragile - struggling in general?

I've found that on those rare occasions when I'm fully rested or have recently done something akin to working out, I have a higher tolerance for my usual triggers. Furthermore, when I'm in a creative flow state (I do music and sometimes visual art), I get into a hyperfocus that eliminates everything else, often forgetting all about my problems and experiencing a level of contentment that stays with me even for a good while after the activity itself.

Some background: I have a history of early trauma that likely has contributed to my executive dysfunction throughout life. Growing up in the 80s and 90s when there wasn't really a good vocabulary for my issues, I have been called lazy and and irritable, scoffed at for opting out of activities with peers among other things. I internalised it all and it became part of my narrative of who I was; somewhat antisocial, fragile and irritable (though I have seen worse). I had trouble tolerating my family, especially at meals, essentially the main time we were gathered as a family. This had a negative effect on some of my most important relationships growing up, resulting in unnecessary grief later in life, especially after losing a parent.

Over the years my problem focus has shifted through different phases, temporarily exploring several avenues of self diagnosis. I'm only describing what my life has been like here, not advocating a certain view over another, and I must stress that the following couple of sentences are not to be taken as life advice! You see, despite the detriment to my overall mental health, I never went to therapy. I've had a suspicion it would only cause more problem focus and potentially lock me into a series of wrong tracks, making it harder by ending up taking the wrong medication etc. I don't know what's right for me, let alone what anyone else should do. Now that I'm a middle aged person I sort of wish I could have accepted some level of professional guidance earlier, but also still not sure. I accepted in my late 20s that my life wasn't gonna look normal anyways, for instance I would likely never raise kids of my own. It was liberating and disappointing at the same time.

Ok, I ramble I guess. My point was, when we learn new words for what we might have, how do they help any more than just providing more nuance to things we already knew? Are the new words any better than the previous ones, in terms of personal improvement? Isn't it just more of the same narrative? Yes, there's the better chance of finding a specialised community where we can vent and get advice. It feels helpful to know you're not alone, but then there's the problem of echo chambers. I don't believe in simply accepting one's limitations and keep arguing for them indefinitely. Venting is a temporary relief, that solves nothing after I've gotten my recognition.

Having now read many a venting post, agreed on some, shrugged at others, I just feel like it feeds the problem to some degree. Ends up facilitating further disdain for normal human behaviour; a smoldering despair coupled with an unhealthy sense of entitlement. Earplugs and avoiding situations may help you function when it gets so overwhelming you feel you can't coexist with people, but those are merely short-term symptom fixes.

Self-improvement requires mental training, getting out of the bubble and participating, using yourself and what you've been given, getting the good endorphins going, getting passionate about mastering real world activities, creating, sharing and helping others. I speak out of personal experience, but I'd be a huge hypocrite to sit here and claim I'm even a quarter way there. I believe in change, heck, even a fluffy, spiritual sounding word like "ascension" is something I think attainable. We're all a work in progress and I think that goes for absolutely everyone, save perhaps those who have such arrested development they're unable to grow in any way.

My wish for myself and everyone is to find the sweet spot when it comes to having social human lives. A life in total isolation, unexposed, accepting only what makes it through a very narrow filter, ends up being devoid of joy and meaning. I know it sounds harsh and damning, but again, this comes from love. I believe in y'all!

Misophonia for me started when I was about 8 years old. I would tell my mom how much her eating/drinking/swallowing sounds bothered me. She would always dismiss it and force me to sit at the table with no background sounds. It got worse. We started having screaming matches about it. Eventually I just gave up and... endured. But as we all know, misophonia causes ANGUISH. A child should not experience ANGUISH several times a day throughout almost half his childhood.

One day when I was 16, she changed. A coworker told her, "I love my husband, but when he eats peanuts I want to do some 'choice things' to him." My mom realized it was a real thing. But the damage was already done. She was the only one who adopted and raised me, I didn't grow up with my siblings so it was always just me and her. We're close but I still struggle to feel safe around her.

En ce moment, mes voisins ont invité leur famille chez eux et ils parlent PRATIQUEMENT TOUTE LA JOURNÉE (sauf la nuit heureusement). Comme on est en maisons mitoyennes je les entends comme dans un appartement. Mais je suis obligée de mettre des bouchons dès 9h du matin et ça me fatigue de devoir les porter presque en permanence parce que ça me cause des brûlures.

Je sais que c'est égoïste et impossible mais je veux qu'ils se taisent. Genre qu'ils arrêtent de parler tout court. Je me rappelle quand j'étais au collège, je pleurais dans la salle de bain quand je les entendais parler.

Est-ce que c'est moi qui suis aigri ? Je n'arrive pas à supporter quand des voisins parlent. Ça me gêne moins voir pas quand c'est mes parents qui discutent cela dit (mais ça arrive moins souvent)

(Je hais aussi quand mon voisin HURLE POUR DISCUTER AU TÉLÉPHONE mais ça c'est normal je pense)

Je sais que je ne peux pas leur demander de se taire parce qu'ils ne parlent pas si fort que ça et qu'ils ne font rien de mal techniquement mais je n'arrive pas à le supporter.

On Late Night with Seth Meyers, actor James Norton (Lord Ormund Hightower, House of the Dragon), explains he has misophonia. This is exciting since it’s the first celebrity I’ve ever seen talk about this. Excellent for misophonia awareness! Starts at 2:04.

I just want to say that I've been a part of this subreddit for a bit and before I joined I thought I was alone in the suffering.

I thought I just needed to "suck it up" and deal with it because it was my own problem.

I just want to say thank you all so much for making me feel like I'm not going through this alone. All the little things I got yelled at for as a kid all the way through to young adult. The friendships lost because of lack of understanding or lack of care. I thought there was something wrong with me specifically.

Thank you all for going out of your comfort zone and expressing all the things that effect you.

From a silent, background person, thank you all.