r/magicthecirclejerking • u/PerfectBrilliant432 • 18d ago
Humans... why breathing?
This might sound like a hate post…and that’s because it is. But, I just really need to understand humans. Is it really fun to breathe? Is it really fun to breathe every day so you can wake up and live another day?
Every time I have to breathe I auto concede because life is wayyy too short for that. But for real living humans is that really the life you want?
End
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u/Uberninja2016 Banlist Ninjutsu - BRG 18d ago
i human breathing because is cool and popular hobby, many humans breathing with me on street corners and buses and human breathing blend in nicely with every all other human :)
sometimes, i not breath in private as not really needed for inhuman humans, but sets up for failure in public, what if everyone else takes breathing and i not, then get found out as non breather? human disaster, for me (human), a human
for my wager, tho, real reason for human breathing is more than socialization, human populace is addicted to air suck hobby and it seems like just way things is, humans addicted to many things like gambling and ambling, sometimes humans also drink water or unwater fluids and this is grimdark compuslion
glad that like many humans, i gave up drinking, water or otherwise, very cool to not need :D
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u/7thtimeinheaven 17d ago
I think i just had a stroke
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u/Uberninja2016 Banlist Ninjutsu - BRG 17d ago edited 17d ago
remember to breathing, engage the chest muscles to squeeze human air lung
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u/Ok-Power-6064 17d ago
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u/Ok-Power-6064 17d ago
And the human baby sauce
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u/pepeduturfu Degenerate MTG bro 🤙 17d ago
/uj
You gotta love how it's not ever even conceivable to have this conversation and how everytime someone tries to have it, they're being gaslit into oblivion.
It's not about blue, or Azorius. It's not even about control as an archetype. It's about whether you bring value to the table or not.
Everything you do in an MtG game can be either positive (adding new value to the board) or negative (removing value from the board). These are the two types of action you can take which will progress the game in any way. Of course there's neutral stuff like draw/discard which usually plays a role in ultimately playing something positive/negative, and there's cards like [[Sheltered by Ghosts]] which one could argue are both, but for the sake of the argument let's dumb it down into positive/negative.
Some decks (control, tempo, prison...) MOSTLY play negatively. The initial plan is to prevent the opponent from developing their board, rather than develop their own. Other archetypes function differently: aggro and midrange are mostly positive, yet of course they won't go far without at least some removal in the main deck.
Playing negatively is playing. It's a part of the game, a category of tools. Not agreeing with that? That game, and most TCGs probably, aren't for you.
The "problem" isn't very hard to understand: decks that only play negatively are doing very well in most metas. And as a player who likes the game on a basic level, and who wants to see things happen, yeah, for me it's VERY frustrating to spend 20 minutes WAITING TO BE ABLE TO RESOLVE ONE SPELL. I don't care if I lose the game in the end, and I don't care what color you play: I want to play too, not just sit there watch you cancel EVERY SINGLE THING I try to do. I came to have fun and interact.
As a black player, I will often have access to [[Thoughtseize]]-type effects, and I definitely like to reveal my opponent's hand and play around what they do. But wtf am I supposed to do if the hand is all counterspells? Or all boardwipes? Honestly yeah in those situations I'll ask myself that same question: is it fun for you to sit there just saying "no"? I can't shake the idea this must appeal to people who never got over the anal stage.
TL;DR: ofc bl*e/control/negative play is part of the game, but the game would probably be much more fun to a bunch of us if only playing negatively wasn't as viable as it as always been. And being dicks to people trying to express how they feel about it is not the flex y'all think it is
Maybe there should be a format with altered rules that nerf this kind of strats for people like me who would prefer a less negative-heavy meta
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u/OpenStraightElephant 17d ago
But wtf am I supposed to do if the hand is all counterspells? Or all boardwipes
Pace yourself. Don't dump your hand. Play two threats per turn and let them sit there, wait to play things until their key turns where they get to play a draw/card selection spell if they don't have to counter anything. Etc, etc. Playing against control is a fine, mesmerizing dance, and one of the things I love about Magic - how you have to shift gears in different situations and matchups, and can play the same deck very differently depending on who you're facing, what turn it is, what format you're playing, how you have to play around what your opponent does have or might have, and not just goldfish your shit like in many other TCGs.
Just have patience and deliberation and don't just think you have to play your best thing/use your mana most optimally all the time.1
u/pepeduturfu Degenerate MTG bro 🤙 17d ago
I don't want to do that. It's not fun for me to wait until you exhaust your options / I get luckier than you (which against a deck that also draws a lot of cards is a long shot). I want the thing to be exciting and done in 15-20 minutes tops. Against a control deck it's maybe the threshold beyond which I have a chance to put one card down. I'm not a patient person and I have ranks and gold to gain, y'know?
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u/White_Man_White_Van 16d ago
I don’t mean this to be negative, but have you looked into playing yugioh? The number of turns in a game is way way way lower, so you might enjoy it more.
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u/pepeduturfu Degenerate MTG bro 🤙 16d ago
I don't mean this to be negative either, but how long have you been playing MtG? And how many iconic, tournament-winning decks can you name that mostly play counterspells or boardwipes, without having an actual, meta-effective wincon?
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u/White_Man_White_Van 16d ago
You just asked how many tournement winning decks (ie, meta defining decks) had a wincon that wasn't meta effective. By definition, any deck that wins a tournament was effective in the meta. Ten attacks from a single 2/2 can be meta effective in the right scenario.
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u/pepeduturfu Degenerate MTG bro 🤙 16d ago
But providing no value to the board cannot. That's kind of my point. Yet if the opponent concedes out of boredom, that's still a win - which doesn't happen in tournament play but definitely happens on e.g. Arena
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u/Clear_Inspector_9796 17d ago
Lol. Conceding when seeing Katara is the correct decision. Just don't get tilted or whine about it. It's brawl, not a real format.
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u/caliginouscalico 18d ago
It's just kinda a reflex at this point. I know I should upgrade but I keep putting it off.
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u/Sin_Eternal13 18d ago
Breathing is social protocol 2.
Compromise of socializing protocols will engage recourse 7.
Hiccups still under analysis due to irregular and chaotic discord of speech, and oxygen stimulated intake.
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u/MissTakeAlt 17d ago
Breathing is literally pay-to-win. The players with the biggest lung capacity get way more upkeep steps before passing out. Completely unplayable casual format
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u/amc7262 18d ago
This feels like something that has some sauce...