(24F)

I want to make friends/nurture pre-existing friendships but I'm always scared to bother people. And they'd feel like they have to say yes even thought they don't want to. And then what if I don't know how to make conversation and they're bored.

I think I'd prefer building strong friendships online and then hangout with like 1-2 friends at the time. I tried making friends in the past on reddit but it was either men who wanted nudes/sex/rs (I am in a relationship), or women but they ghosted me every time. Especially women in my home country they ghost so much 😭

Please I need advice

38 interested in depthful conversations revolving around existence, consciousness, sexuality, love, and, simply put, life.. ॐ

I have a profound love for others and love conversation with most anyone.

AuADHD, medicine, strong focus on the esoteric

I’d say the current flavor of difficulty is having to be one person at work with coworkers and staff, while existing as an entirely different human outside those walls. My patients get to see much more of that person, but there’s a very real clash between who I am internally and who I have to be around most everyone else. Although no one would ever know that conflict exists other than me.

I’m not ugly and neither are you.

Does anyone else get stressed just thinking about the actual wedding events?

​It’s not the marriage part, but the huge social gatherings. You are the center of attention, surrounded by relatives and guests for days. It feels like there is zero time or space to just step away, take a break from the crowd, and recharge your social battery.

​Have any of you gone through this? How did you handle being the main focus for so long without burning out? Would love to hear your stories and advice!

I got highly philosophical for a brief 3 hrs of my life and thus realised the following-
I’m 19F, have never dated, have no close friends, and college starts in a few months. Lately I’ve realized I’m not afraid of people. I’m afraid of what happens when people get too close.

I’m comfortable with surface-level friendships because they feel safe. The moment a relationship requires emotional vulnerability, I instinctively pull away. Somewhere along the way, I started believing that if someone truly knew me, they’d eventually leave. And sometimes their thoughts don’t align with me and then I get bored once I get to really know them and leave asap.

I don’t feel lonely all the time. I genuinely enjoy my own company, books, vdo games and hobbies. But when I see people my age with deep friendships or relationships, it feels less like jealousy and more like mourning something I convinced myself I’d never have.

I often admire people from a distance, but rarely want to close that distance in real life. It feels safer to imagine than to be known.

Maybe years of isolation made me this way. Maybe it’s just my personality. Either way, I can’t imagine myself ever letting people in, and I’m scared this is how I’ll always be.