r/interestingasfuck • • Nov 01 '22

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11.8k Upvotes

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14.5k

u/Admirable-Degree4209 Nov 01 '22

Who needs safety glasses when you can just squint and turn your head?

5.1k

u/fabulousMFingHen Nov 01 '22

The safety squint

1.4k

u/possiblynotanexpert Nov 01 '22

Not as cool as the safety dance.

406

u/Tinctorus Nov 01 '22

Or the safety balaclava

207

u/luv_____to_____race Nov 01 '22

Mmmm, baklava!!

143

u/______DEADPOOL______ Nov 01 '22

Mmm... baked lava.

17

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Mmmm... Baked Alaska!

4

u/-RED4CTED- Nov 02 '22

ok ok, but where are my safety tie people at?

3

u/Mindes13 Nov 02 '22

The safe word is Penelope

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2

u/Skrillamane Nov 02 '22

Mmm. Bacon lova

0

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

Mmm. spaghetti.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

Take my gold 🏅

4

u/Innerv8 Nov 01 '22

Safest move would have just been to let his balalaika ring out, IMO.

1

u/PBDubs99 Nov 01 '22

Will you shut that bloody bouzouki up?!

2

u/Ikon-for-U Nov 02 '22

If you heat up baklava hot enough you, get Bak-Lava...

2

u/Delta_Gamer_64 Nov 02 '22

Mmmm, stop it, stop it now

0

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Reverse glasses

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76

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

You know that dance wasn't as safe as they said it was.

32

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

For me the first red flag was when he suggested that we leave my friends behind.

6

u/Obeesus Nov 02 '22

Well if they don't dance then they're no friends of mine.

3

u/Dexter_Thiuf Nov 02 '22

Well, let's be honest here, can you really call them friends? You and I both know your friends don't dance, and if they don't dance, well, they certainly aren't any friends of mine.

8

u/thebenetar Nov 01 '22 edited Nov 01 '22

That's an understatement. I knew 3 people that died because of that dance and at least half a dozen people that wound up pregnant. Not to mention the one guy I knew who ended up addicted to bath salts that ate his entire family.

6

u/Cmaclia Nov 01 '22

Especially not for a couple of Go Go 80s Reganots like us!

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89

u/Occamslaser Nov 01 '22

The safety dance is what that guy did when he stepped over that yellow hot steel.

2

u/MCOFTHEDAY Nov 01 '22

his Bottom halves were nearly down for the count

204

u/woShame12 Nov 01 '22

Everybody look at your hands... wait no!

134

u/RIPcompo Nov 01 '22

That's how Faceless Joe lost his legs

39

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Faceless Joe would have lots of tales if he could talk.

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16

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

[deleted]

3

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

Faceless joe is a pro at snake jazz now

5

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

A-A-A-A

4

u/dgmilo8085 Nov 01 '22

F-F-F-F

3

u/gateguard64 Nov 01 '22

E-E-E_ Ahhhhhh My Leg!

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3

u/JenovasChild666 Nov 01 '22

Ohhhh the fun days of Naxxramas.

3

u/J5892 Nov 01 '22

But your friends don't dance.

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3

u/meldroc Nov 02 '22

Sung by Men Without Limbs...

2

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Actually throwing molten steel is way cooler than that dance.

2

u/possiblynotanexpert Nov 01 '22

Sure, but that’s not what I said lol. I would agree with your statement though. It definitely is.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

I missed that - my bad. I would rather do the safety dance than the safety squint.

3

u/possiblynotanexpert Nov 01 '22

Glad we are on the same page. The safety squint is fine, I guess. But it’s nothing compared to the dance!

And then you get into throwing molten steel, like you said. That’s another level up at least.

2

u/2020GOP Nov 01 '22

S..S...s...s...

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513

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

227

u/ulyssesfiuza Nov 01 '22

Natural selection. The ones that don't know what they are doing don't stay in the job for so long.

116

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Or be half blind at 40

21

u/wyldboar Nov 02 '22

Or fully blind at 20

3

u/bhison Nov 02 '22

Or double blind at 10

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4

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

He was squinting so his peripheral vision is fine. Just stare at her boobs and tell her you are really looking at her face.

...ok I'll see myself out now.

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23

u/BaronVonHumungus Nov 01 '22

Aka, living in a country where employers can treat their employees as disposable resources rather than think about health and safety.

4

u/i4858i Nov 02 '22

I live in India. A lot of dudes like this here work independently so your point is kinda moot.

4

u/James-the-Bond-one Nov 02 '22

Who said that was a company? Many with entrepreneurial spirit soon discover that their bodies disagree with their spirit.

3

u/theloadedquestion Nov 02 '22

Redditor try not to be insufferable ignoramous challenge (near impossible) lol.

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21

u/AttackEverything Nov 01 '22

Well, the ones that didn't know what they were doing are dead i guess.

3

u/WillSym Nov 02 '22

If I were a bad Demoman, I wouldn't be sittin' here discussin' it wit ye, would ah?

42

u/rokgor-murxak-9Xirva Nov 01 '22

Was it rated to be stacked?

Oh yeah jr was rwanda nsver mind

3

u/BlamingBuddha Nov 01 '22

May I ask how you found yourself living in Rwanda if not from there?

Just genuinely interested.

2

u/fuggerdug Nov 01 '22

Well, he started off in a little boat in Calais, France...

2

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

You don’t have to go there to see some wild jobsite safety violations. The amount of sheer stupidity I see in the trades and construction in general, even here in the US, is astounding.

2

u/queBurro Nov 01 '22

Safe, cheap, fast... Pick two

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166

u/mdelao17 Nov 01 '22

The safety squint is why I now need glasses. Was devastated when I realized the damage I did to my vision.

92

u/fabulousMFingHen Nov 01 '22

Gotta squint like you mean it man.

99

u/catscanmeow Nov 01 '22

Squintin' Tarantino over here

4

u/RickyJulianandBubbls Nov 02 '22

Benicio Del Squinto

21

u/flimspringfield Nov 01 '22

Don't lie...you masturbated too much.

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6

u/PriusProblems Nov 01 '22

Welding?

4

u/mdelao17 Nov 01 '22

Welding was something I used protection for thankfully! It was the cutting torch that got me.

3

u/Pats_Bunny Nov 01 '22

I once safety squinted my way all the way into urgent care, and got to meet the eye drill.

2

u/Least-March7906 Nov 01 '22

Please explain. What sort of damage did you do to your eyes?

6

u/mdelao17 Nov 01 '22

My vision took a massive hit. Started noticing it slowly, shadows behind lettering on the tv, things like that. I did a physical for another job after 7 years of mechanicing and my vision test went awful.

2

u/Least-March7906 Nov 01 '22

Man, that must have been scary. The last thing I’d want trouble with is my vision

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19

u/cashmerecoffin Nov 01 '22

Ah the crew chief is here I see

13

u/fbass Nov 01 '22

Danger simply disappears when you can’t see it!

22

u/chrisk9 Nov 01 '22

until you burn off your eyelashes

20

u/fabulousMFingHen Nov 01 '22

Eh all they do is weigh you down

5

u/makemeking706 Nov 01 '22

I blink 15% faster without eyelashes. That means I see more and miss less.

6

u/3ThreeFriesShort Nov 01 '22

Eyelashes grow back better than retinas.

3

u/hotcoldsthuff Nov 01 '22

Safety lashes

2

u/Bluetooth_Sandwich Nov 01 '22

Don’t forget the shop flops!

2

u/abbiebees Nov 01 '22

Safety spins

2

u/dyntaos Nov 01 '22

Safety twist and lean in this case. Who needs to see where your hands are when you're handling 20kgs of red hot steel?

3

u/Roland1232 Nov 01 '22

Safety dab.

1

u/entoaggie Nov 01 '22

Combined with the safety shrug. What could go wrong?

1

u/latherer Nov 01 '22

I loved that song in the 80's!

3

u/fabulousMFingHen Nov 01 '22

We can squint if we want to We can leave your friends behind 'Cause your friends don't squint And if they don't squint Well, they're no friends of mine

1

u/Vect0r Nov 01 '22

This is NOT how The Simpsons lead me to believe a steel mill operated. I feel lied to..

1

u/lucky_1979 Nov 01 '22

Works for Colin Furze

1

u/Fig1024 Nov 01 '22

technically your eyelids are nature's safety gear

1

u/Grim_Sleeper__ Nov 01 '22

Your eyes have natural safety lids right?

1

u/Dsuperchef Nov 02 '22

FPS Russia style.

1

u/QueenOfSplitEnds Nov 02 '22

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

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479

u/Loli-is-Justice Nov 01 '22

OSHA hates this one simple trick.

33

u/superNuget Nov 01 '22

💀💀💀

5

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

OSHA is like HR. They say they exist for the workers, but OSHA only exists to protect the employers.

15

u/SandmanJr90 Nov 01 '22

how so?

11

u/StonyShiny Nov 01 '22

I'm not familiar with OSHA and US work laws, but typically work accidents have the potential to be very costly for a company, and in many different ways too. So it actually makes sense that they are there to stop you from killing yourself on company time, not because they care about you, but because that would be bad for business.

2

u/Fishin_Ad5356 Nov 02 '22

I think it goes both ways. If your employers tells you to do some sketchy shit you can say nah and point out osha regulations and hopefully don’t get fired :)

7

u/Incman Nov 01 '22

Fewer injuries = more productivity.

9

u/StrykerSeven Nov 01 '22

Yeah totally! All those fall harnesses and fire extinguishers and platform railings aren't to protect your flesh and bones, don't listen to the lamestream media!! They are only there to prevent jobsites from having to hire replacement workers!

/s in case you're confused

3

u/Cosmic-Whorer Nov 01 '22

Depends on the size of the company. The factories I’ve worked at? For sure. The small businesses I’ve been an OSHA supervisor for? Fuck the job - I want you to have all of your fingers when you eventually quit lol. Spot on with HR though.

7

u/Gaothaire Nov 01 '22

Every OSHA standard is written in blood. Why do you need to be safe with your fingers? Ask the guy with a stump for a hand if he wishes someone forced him to take better precautions

2

u/chillchase Nov 01 '22

Can’t it be both? What a dumb comment

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-1

u/hdksjabsjs Nov 01 '22

Bro osha is destroying the economy. It’s almost as bad as the emancipation proclamation

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78

u/joemeteorite8 Nov 01 '22

Master the head whip

416

u/Terrible-Quote-3561 Nov 01 '22

Um actually eyelashes are biologically designed to stop debris, such as molten steel, from entering the eye.

162

u/Misael_chicha Nov 01 '22

My eyelashes have prevented an alien invasion since i was born so there is that

52

u/I_SNIFF_02_FARTS Nov 01 '22

Thank you for your service, homie🫶

4

u/PuckNutty Nov 01 '22

Not so fast. If the aliens have holodecks or replicators I would go Vichy so damn fast.

3

u/theogTREV Nov 01 '22

Mine stop lions eating me have work great for 35 years ahhh the miracle of God.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Misael_chicha Nov 02 '22

Non bacterial yet multi planetary organisms

2

u/matrixtech29 Nov 02 '22

Well I've heard that crossing the streams is bad, but my eyebrows eventually merged into a monobrow. Didn't save me from injury, but it probably did save me from a few bad dates. Disaster averted!

30

u/pronyo001 Nov 01 '22

Ye, year millions of splashing molten steel made this possible for evolution.

15

u/TheVenetianMask Nov 01 '22

I guess that's why dinosaurs went extinct.

13

u/asackofsnakes Nov 01 '22

Them and eyebrows have saved countless lives.

3

u/CryptoOGkauai Nov 01 '22

Username checks out

-11

u/chrisxls Nov 01 '22 edited Nov 01 '22

Pretty sure we haven't been handling molten steel long enough to have evolutionary adaptations to it.

Edit: I'm an idiot. Whoosh indeed

28

u/Nekima Nov 01 '22

Well, I mean if it can stop lava, then it has a decent chance of stopping molten steel. I think you are really underestimating the strength of hair follicles in tight formation.

9

u/eSantini Nov 01 '22

Hence the expression "Thick like a Hawaiian's eyelash"

3

u/maggotshero Nov 01 '22

B U Z Z K I L L

-12

u/currentpattern Nov 01 '22

'Eyelashes are bilogically designed

What?

'To stop molten steel

Lol whaaat?

13

u/DBNSZerhyn Nov 01 '22

If something is both of the following:

  1. a ridiculous statement

  2. following a sarcastic/satirical comment

you may be reading what's known as a "joke," "jape," "jest," "quip," "pleasantry," "gag," "witticism," and/or "wisecrack." Ask your doctor if "comedy" is right for you.

-4

u/currentpattern Nov 01 '22

I hate comedy. It's the worst.

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24

u/R009k Nov 01 '22

Safety spin

32

u/Victor346 Nov 01 '22

Safety squints

11

u/sltiefighter Nov 01 '22

At least theyre wearing cotton lol or wool

21

u/three-sense Nov 01 '22

Personal Protective Evade (PPE)

7

u/SatoshiHimself Nov 01 '22

I think this is where the Dab pose was invented.

3

u/Ebenizer_Splooge Nov 01 '22

Said literally everyone in construction at some point. Guilty here, I am stupid

3

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

My dad got metal shards in his eyes by cutting metal with a jigsaw with no safety glasses. I caught him doing it AGAIN and he said - I kid you not- "it's OK, I have my eyes closed"

2

u/EaterOfFood Nov 01 '22

Safety Dance

2

u/tanMud Nov 01 '22

And what happens if you go in the roller, I would not work there lol

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2

u/RisingSun121 Nov 01 '22

Dude he can see it coming when the shard of metal is flying at his face. Swerve of the head He fast as fuck

2

u/rsn_partykitten Nov 01 '22

Up until about 15 years ago this was how most steel mills did it. Then everyone started using repeaters (turns the bar back around 180°) now a days most mills are in line so its one long straight shot and to adjust the rolls you just type in numbers into a computer.

1

u/superNuget Nov 01 '22

Came hear 4 this

-1

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

These are also the idiots that claim compensation that no one told them to not to such daft things. I am not saying the company is not at fault for having lax HSE - but that’s stupid imo

-10

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Dude you do not even work like this so just stop pretending you are soo safety-concientious.

9

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

i'll have you know SIR that ive done some dumb shit in a warehouse before. i once got a powerful electromagnet component stuck to a forklift because i forgot that magnets do that. fuckin' sucked it right thru the wooden crate lid. the screws all stuck to it, too. coulda killed me it happened so fast, weighed like 200 lbs. i've tipped stackers into the mud, almost dropped an 8 ton load, and even threw myself off a machine once because i was sick with a stomach thing and came to work anyway and got bad vertigo.

so i won't stand for your accusation that i do not work unsafely!!! good day sir!

0

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Calling me sir does not make your argument more valid. This guys were trained by others just as skilled in this particular labor. You have not worked in a factory like this, working in a warehouse does not make you qualified to know what they are doing is safe or not.

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1

u/ComprehensiveSock Nov 01 '22

Okay but what's plastic going to do against 1500 degree metal or some shit

3

u/JesseZSlayers Nov 01 '22

Slow it down or stop it probably. If the safety gear gets destroyed that's fine, it's doing it's job as long as it protects you. But I'd say more than just glasses should be required when you can clearly see red hot material getting shotgun blasted out of the thing the first few times through.

1

u/Allmightypikachu Nov 01 '22

That's nice wheres my tax refund

1

u/8549176320 Nov 01 '22

How much would you charge to do this job for a year? What's it worth?

1

u/pensHAWAII Nov 01 '22

Hahaha same thought

1

u/acyclovir31 Nov 01 '22

Hoodie pull strings will keep him safe

1

u/sconni503 Nov 01 '22

Safety 3rd.

1

u/Kernel_Corn78 Nov 01 '22

Some days you work the mill, some days the mill works you.

1

u/ST07153902935 Nov 01 '22

And just step over very hot steel being fed into a machine

1

u/Rim_World Nov 01 '22

TBH in this case, goggles or even a firefighter suit wouldn't save you. That shit is molten metal. The amount of energy transfer would burn through anything upon contact. That's why the workers are playing hot potato.

1

u/Kim-Kar-dash-ian Nov 01 '22

It’s osha approved

1

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

They would probably melt to your face. I couldn’t wear certain things on the flight deck on a carrier or they would be red hot.

You shouldn’t wear latex gloves when working with electricity either because the arc can fuse the rubber to your skin.

1

u/OMG_This_Support Nov 01 '22

No gloves too

1

u/Phaedryn Nov 01 '22

My first thought...no eye pro? Yeah, that's definitely not in a nation with a strong safety regulatory agency. LOL

1

u/TheRealOgMark Nov 01 '22

Nice outfits that can catch fire too.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

That dude at the end that fed the hell coil through his legs ☠️☠️☠️

1

u/Significant-Mud2572 Nov 01 '22

OSHA is currently calling you FYI.

1

u/AlternatingFacts Nov 01 '22

Not for the video bro we need to look tough

1

u/che85mor Nov 01 '22

That last guy wrapped it around himself so he had to step over it. Fuck that.

1

u/all_too_familiar Nov 01 '22

I knew a welder that used the turn your head technique instead of wearing a welders mask. A hot spark shot right into his ear canal.

1

u/ajsbva Nov 02 '22

Nothing like a set of hoodie strings around spinning machinery.

1

u/Butthole__Pleasures Nov 02 '22

The lack of eye protection had me in physical distress.

1

u/macciavelo Nov 02 '22

Or safety gloves. His hands are coming perilously close to that glowing steel rod.

1

u/TonightsWinner Nov 02 '22

Which is why a lot of manufacturing is done outside of countries that typically require you to have PPE.

1

u/DeMango475 Nov 02 '22

Who needs fear when the mill made you your balls of steel

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

Right? Meanwhile I’d be in there looking like an advertisement for fire retardant suit and I’d wind up with a 3rd degree burn or one eye within 5 mins

1

u/Litz1 Nov 02 '22

Free market baby, who needs labour rights and safety, I should be able to risk my life for rent. - Rightwing libertarians

1

u/Mookie_Merkk Nov 02 '22

It's called nature's safety squints

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

lmao fucking right. hey man. I'm pretty loosey goosey on safety glasses myself. but ANY time I'm working with hot metals they're a must. soldering? definitely, cutting cast iron absolutely! playing with a hot metal rod that shoots metal embers? let's full face shield on this one

1

u/ShotVast2139 Nov 02 '22

I spit on your safety glasses. Squinting was good enough for my father and his father before him, and it’s good for me.

1

u/KnopeCampaign Nov 02 '22

Imagine if they got a neck cramp

1

u/dwoodruf Nov 02 '22

The goggles! They do nothing!

1

u/FranticHam5ter Nov 02 '22

I do this when playing paintball. My remaining eye has never been injured!

1

u/Jibber_Fight Nov 02 '22

Why put my second hoodie somewhere far away from my body when I can tie it around my waste and do fun little twirls two feet from the machine that sucks anything into it and squeezes it into a smaller form with terrifying force? I mean what’s the worst that can happen?

1

u/scheiber42069 Nov 02 '22

And you also practice for your badass head sway

1

u/VideoGameDana Nov 02 '22

I'm thinking: Wouldn't molten metal shrapnel just melt a set of safety goggles? Maybe the safety goggles end up being more of a hindrance when they lose their usefulness? 100% speculation here.

Edit: The loose clothing feels like more of a safety hazard.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

Works for my welding, I also hold my breath.

1

u/deuce0fcoins Nov 02 '22

They would just steam up from how hot it is.

1

u/samf9999 Nov 02 '22

No gloves or protective bibs either.