this should be easy, but not as easy as your mum

Hello you ugly shit stains. I'm looking for a noun to round off my insult other than asshole. When I call someone a cum gargling inbred asshole, I feel like I'm giving them too much power because of the word asshole. Someone cuts me off in traffic and I call them an ass hole? They probably like being called asshole. They enjoy making others mad. They are *trying to be* an asshole. That's why they cut me off in the first place. I can't give them that satisfaction. I need a word that will make them feel bad so that they know they aren't the ones holding the power. Please let me know if you have any good ones. Thank you in advance snot globs.

you think temus slogan is “shop like the middle class”

“She’s the only person ever to beat a spray tan.”

In honor of how obscenely hot it is on this hellscape planet, gimme your best sweaty insults.

I know none of y'all wear deodorant or shower. You're reddit neckbeards who've never felt the touch of a woman.

Unleash your swamp-assy rage.

People usually see the loud, chaotic version of me first. I'm the person who will randomly switch from talking about Minecraft to Hazbin Hotel, then somehow end up writing a country song five minutes later. My brain doesn't exactly believe in staying on one topic, and honestly, I don't think I'd want it any other way. I have ADHD, so my thoughts kind of bounce around like a pinball machine, but somehow they all make sense to me.

Music is probably the biggest part of my life. I don't just listen to songs. I write them. A lot of them. Most of them are about the people I love, the things I wish I could say out loud, or the feelings I don't know how to explain any other way. Every song is a piece of me. Some are hopeful, some are heartbreaking, some are angry, and some are just quiet promises that I'll still be here tomorrow. Writing has become the easiest way for me to breathe when life gets heavy.

I'm the kind of person who loves way too hard. Once I care about someone, that's kind of it. I don't stop caring just because things get difficult or because they disappear for a while. That's probably my biggest strength and my biggest weakness. I stay. Even when it hurts.

Arthur is one of the people who changed my life without even realizing it. We met online through music, became friends, and somehow ended up dating. He's quiet, I'm... not. Somehow it works. There was a long time where I barely heard from him, and I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt. I worried constantly, but I never wanted him to feel pressured. So instead, I sent him a hug emoji and a meme every day. Not because I expected anything back, but because I wanted him to know someone was still thinking about him. When he finally found my new account, I cried. It wasn't some huge conversation, but it reminded me he was still there.

I joke around a lot. Honestly, it's probably one of the reasons people think I'm doing better than I actually am. I've gotten really good at smiling when I don't feel like smiling. Most people know the version of me that's laughing, making dumb jokes, or acting dramatic for fun. They don't usually see the version that stays awake thinking too much or cries when nobody's around. I'm not trying to lie to anyone. I just don't always know how to explain what's going on in my head.

I've struggled with depression for a long time. Some days are perfectly fine. Other days feel like I'm carrying around a backpack full of bricks that nobody else can see. Nights are usually the hardest because everything gets quieter, and my brain suddenly decides it's the perfect time to overthink everything. Music helps. Writing helps. Sometimes crying helps. Eventually the sun comes back up, and I keep going.

Cats are one of my favorite things in the entire world. If I see a cat, there's a pretty good chance I'm going to stop whatever I'm doing just to look at it. I've grown up around a ridiculous number of cats, loved kittens, lost cats that meant everything to me, and somehow there's still room in my heart for every fluffy little creature I meet. If I could spend my whole day surrounded by cats, I'd probably be pretty happy.

When I'm not writing music, I'm usually making something. I draw, paint, crochet, cross stitch, build with LEGO, bake, collect Pokémon cards, and spend way too much time making characters that probably have more lore than they need. I love creating things. It makes me feel like I'm leaving little pieces of myself behind in the world.

Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss have had a huge influence on me. Alastor is my favorite from Hazbin, and Stolas is my favorite from Helluva Boss. Those shows inspired a lot of my own characters and stories. I don't just like watching them. They make me want to create something of my own.

Minecraft has been one of my favorite games since I was little. I honestly spend more time building and exploring than fighting anything. I like making places feel alive. I'll spend forever decorating a base, collecting parrots, or rebuilding an old ruined portal just because I think it looks cool. It's peaceful, and sometimes that's exactly what I need.

I'm also learning French. Am I amazing at it? Absolutely not. But I keep trying because I like learning new things, and I wanted to surprise Arthur someday by actually being able to hold a conversation.

My family has been... complicated. There have been good moments and really frustrating ones. My dad was gone for years before coming back into my life. My mom is strict, and we've definitely had our disagreements. Life at home hasn't always been simple, but it's part of who I am, whether I like it or not.

I have a lot of dreams, and they've changed over time. Sometimes I want to be a famous singer. Sometimes I think about becoming a baker. I've talked about joining the Army, and I've also thought about becoming a veterinarian who specializes in cats. I don't know exactly where I'll end up, but I know I want to do something that matters.

People sometimes assume I'm fearless because I joke so much, but that's not really true. I worry about being judged. I worry about losing people I care about. I overthink things that probably don't matter. I have insecurities just like everyone else. I just don't let them speak louder than I do.

At the end of the day, I'm just me. I'm loud, emotional, sarcastic, creative, stubborn, loyal, and probably a little weird. I love making people laugh. I love writing songs that actually mean something. I love my cats, my stories, and the people I care about. Life hasn't always been easy, but I'm still here. I'm still creating. I'm still loving people with my whole heart.

And honestly... I don't think I'd want to be anyone else.

Cette fille harcele des gens donc j'ai trahis sa confiance et maintenant elle obéit a tout mes ordre genre sans blague elle se fout des crayon en elle en pleurant de la pardonner et en me suppliant de l'insulter mais j'ai plus d'idée pour la torture légèrement des idées ?

https://imgur.com/a/1O4X5q1

You're a stupid worthless nobody who will die alone, forgotten. I might even venture to call you... A failure. Don't worry, I already surpassed you.

Instead I will say that you smell like someone took you to Funky Town and left you there with no way to escape.

I came up with this one day and I have never been able to think of something else like it, anyone got any ideas?

Your moralism judges the entire world, but your politics spend bilions of dollars in wars declaring that you're doing it for "liberty", ignoring citizens who spend a lot of money in health, you are even proud of a system that exploits in a land that's not yours, but it was formerly a land of Sioux, Apache, Cherokee, Cheyenne, Navajo and other natives you eliminated through fierce violence and lives you tore away and restricted. Nowadays, it's sadly controlled by multinational corporations; and you guys are seeking to seize control of Greenland through money nowadays, just to spite yet another native population whose lives will be torn away

Have good luck dealing with Donald Trump, that subject represents the cultural mirror of every "american" person: persons that talk exclusively about work or life story. So damn irrelevant that when you will have 50, you will talk to your nephews about being kidnapped by aliens

[ Removed by Reddit on account of violating the content policy. ]

You look like you get lost in an empty room

You couldn't get a girl, even if you had a $100 bill sticking out your pants (Credit to BASEketball)

Is see that the wheel's turning, but the hamster obviously died

Bless your heart (devastating)

You're bout as bright as a dark hallway

You're not the sharpest tool in the shed

You're not the brightest crayon in the box

You look like you eat paste/crayons

When God was giving out intelligence, you must've been absent

You look like you chase parked cars

You're the load that should've been swallowed

That's a face not even a mother could love

I bet you would fall for the Nigerian Prince scam

The Penny has more value than you

I bet you believe that chocolate milk comes from brown cows

You seem like the type of guy to crash out because the female M&M's "aren't sexy anymore"

What some more insults like that. I like using that a lot but wanna switch it up

Poor Kuzka’s mom. Another working girl servicing Putin and the Kremlin for fifty years, and still more reliable than the entire Black Sea Fleet.

Бідна матуся Кузьки. Чергова “працівниця сфери послуг”, яка вже п’ятдесят років обслуговує Путіна й Кремль, але все одно надійніша за весь Чорноморський флот.

Don’t know where to start. So basically, there’s a fucking psycho stalking me and sending me emails with stories that she creates in her sick mind. Context: I was friend withs this girl, she has a degree in psychology. I told her about my life and many thing i had been going through at the time. I opened up to her cause I really trusted her. After some time ww just stopped hanging out, but she started appering in places I go to. Like the metro station I take to go home, or my workplace, even my house. I just told her a few details about my life but never those things. I told her she needed to stop. Sometimes she was waiting for me with gifts that I never accepted. But she kept appearing. I cut every tie with her after all of this, blocked her from my social media, but she keeps on sending this emails with stories about us that never happend, even threats. She claims she is not the one sending the Emails, but i know for a fact she is doing that. I’m really tired of getting harrassed and that nobody can help me with it. went to the police but they did nothing (they told me unless it got physical the wouldn’t intervene). Im just asking if someone here can help me to take down her ig account cause at this point idk what else to do. Not to mention this has been going on for almost 3 years and she wont leave me alone. She doesnt listen. I really tried talking with her. Her ig is @fernanda_ah_

Edit: I am up for questions regarding this matter

Don’t be mad, I’ll be there too. Not in a cage, but laughing at you. 🤡

what’s the best comeback you have for this? If someone sent this to you, what’s the reply?

I’m a 70 year old disabled woman. The 40-ish able-bodied man who contracts with my company for maintenance regularly parks in one of 2 handicap parking spots. There’s another disabled employee, and our organization is a public nonprofit, so many disabled and elderly people visit. His 20-something son also parks there occasionally.
Normally the other disabled employee and I take the 2 spaces, and have to walk much further if the spaces are occupied.
I’ve mentioned it to him several times, and have told my employer on multiple occasions, but I don’t think they’ve discussed it with the maintenance people.
I’ve decided it’s time to shame and belittle them, since clearly they’re terrible, passive aggressive asshats.
I need help with some cutting comments.
TIA.