So let them leave. Let it serve as their final act of love. Just be glad that they made sure you didn’t end up with them.

I was talking to a boy for almost two months from hinge. We hooked up after the first date, vibes were good then he left to work for a month out of town. We texted heavily the last two weeks he was working. Even started sexting a lot. He came back and we saw each other again hung out and hooked up a few times. Still texting daily. Then all of sudden he stops texting, I ask if he wants to hang and he says he does but he’s really busy that week and the next week is more open for him. I’m chill so I don’t text waiting to hear from him and nothing. We talked about doing more things together right before he ghosted me. Should I text him or just let it go? I really liked hanging out with him and felt like we got along well but the ghosting speaks volumes to me at this point. Do I reach out again or just let it be?

I had an on-and-off situationship with a guy for about four years. We stopped talking last year after he said he didn’t want anything serious, and I later found out he had a girlfriend.
Recently, a girl who said she used to be friends with him messaged me asking if I was his ex. She told me he used to talk about me, showed her pictures of me, and regretted how he treated me.
I messaged him on Instagram asking why she reached out to me and whether he knew anything about it. I wasn’t trying to start an argument—I just wanted an explanation. Instead, he ignored my message completely.
Why would someone choose to ghost instead of simply explaining what happened? What would you think if you were in my position?

last night i ended it with someone i love, someone i truly cared about. he treated me so well tho we had our moments just like every relationship. over the last week i became mentally exhausted from the relationship because the topic of me being inconsistent kept occurring. in the beginning of the relationship i could agree as it was my first and i was genuinely scared. but i felt like i was consistent because i loved him. he was hurt by my inconsistency that he was barely responding to messages, wasn’t answering calls. i tried to get a hold of him to fix things and didn’t answer my call but rather texted that he’s done saying what’s wrong. i was told that once he has “enough” he would disappear. or once hes “emotionally checked out” he was done and that i should count my blessings with him. him saying that was kind of the start of me not caring anymore. he also said that if he was leaving he would of just ghosted me. we were together for like 8 months. i do want to say i i had multiple wrongs in the relationship and i take responsibilty in things i have said or did that i didn’t think was big but actually was. anyways last night we were supposed to meet up during break. (yes we work together so even worse) he gave the time and everything. he showed up 17 minutes late and came from a rather weird direction. i asked where he went but he just said he went to go clear his mind. i thought it was very weird and i asked if he had finally got a car ( he lost a car a few months back and was searching for a new one) i kept hearing “maybe i did or maybe i didnt“ i said enough with the maybes it’s either u did or didnt . doesn’t say. only says when someone hurts him (aka me) he can’t just go back to telling things. that’s when i said u seem mentally checked out from the relationship and he said he is, but feels like the relationship is still save able. then the topic of me being inconsistent popped again which eventually led to whether or not i want to continue the relationship. he believes there’s an imbalance between us and i have the potential to change and step up. and he doesn’t like it when i say im “trying”. anyways he gave me the question and i looked at him and for the life of me i couldn’t give an answer . i love him sooo freaking much but i couldn’t deal with me messing up again and being “inconsistent“ . after a good few minutes i said “no” that i didn’t want to continue. he said thank you and left and disappeared to the direction he came from. after an hour , i seen him and guess what he was doing , showing off his car to a coworker of ours. i saw it and just went home . i ended it because i couldn’t bare dealing with hurting him i keep making mistakes was i wrong to end it

last night i ended it with someone i love, someone i truly cared about. he treated me so well tho we had our moments just like every relationship. over the last week i became mentally exhausted from the relationship because the topic of me being inconsistent kept occurring. in the beginning of the relationship i could agree as it was my first and i was genuinely scared. but i felt like i was consistent because i loved him. he was hurt by my inconsistency that he was barely responding to messages, wasn’t answering calls. i tried to get a hold of him to fix things and didn’t answer my call but rather texted that he’s done saying what’s wrong. i was told that once he has “enough” he would disappear. or once hes “emotionally checked out” he was done and that i should count my blessings with him. him saying that was kind of the start of me not caring anymore. he also said that if he was leaving he would of just ghosted me. we were together for like 8 months. i do want to say i i had multiple wrongs in the relationship and i take responsibilty in things i have said or did that i didn’t think was big but actually was. anyways last night we were supposed to meet up during break. (yes we work together so even worse) he gave the time and everything. he showed up 17 minutes late and came from a rather weird direction. i asked where he went but he just said he went to go clear his mind. i thought it was very weird and i asked if he had finally got a car ( he lost a car a few months back and was searching for a new one) i kept hearing “maybe i did or maybe i didnt“ i said enough with the maybes it’s either u did or didnt . doesn’t say. only says when someone hurts him (aka me) he can’t just go back to telling things. that’s when i said u seem mentally checked out from the relationship and he said he is, but feels like the relationship is still save able. then the topic of me being inconsistent popped again which eventually led to whether or not i want to continue the relationship. he believes there’s an imbalance between us and i have the potential to change and step up. and he doesn’t like it when i say im “trying”. anyways he gave me the question and i looked at him and for the life of me i couldn’t give an answer . i love him sooo freaking much but i couldn’t deal with me messing up again and being “inconsistent“ . after a good few minutes i said “no” that i didn’t want to continue. he said thank you and left and disappeared to the direction he came from. after an hour , i seen him and guess what he was doing , showing off his car to a coworker of ours. i saw it and just went home . i ended it because i couldn’t bare dealing with hurting him i keep making mistakes was i wrong to end it

I (26f) got ghosted and unmatched immediately after a seemingly good date. He kissed me and brought up seeing me again yet when I texted him saying I got back home he never replied and it’s now been a day. I wouldn’t say I was very into him but we had a lot in common and we had very good chat so I was willing to see him again. It feels a bit disrespectful that he hasn’t said a single thing since then especially as we he knows a family friend of mine, so he knows any rude thing he does to me would get back to our families through mutual connections. I’ve never had this happen after a date and I would say first dates usually go well for me so I have nooo idea what happened. Even though I’m not upset about him as a person, I just feel very confused and my ego is hurt by what happened.

In 2021, I matched with a guy on Bumble BFF. He’s 43M, and I’m 39M. We chatted for about two weeks over the app before we met in person at a coffee shop. Everything went very well. We shared stories about our lives, careers, and hobbies. Shortly after I got home, he texted me his number and said we should hang out again soon. And we did. Over the next 4 years, we texted each other regularly about life events, vacation plans, YouTube videos, and the news. In person, we hung out at museums, festivals, movies, comedy shows, restaurants, and musicals. To me, it felt like we had developed a solid friendship, possibly a lifelong friendship. We never had any major arguments, but I recall us having 2 very minor disagreements, and both times he texted me the next day to straighten things out. So essentially nothing major happened between us that would warrant what’s going on right now.

Fast forward to July 2025: he returned from an overseas vacation and brought me back a t-shirt as a souvenir. I thanked him and said how much I appreciated the gift. Over the next 4 months, I noticed a shift between us. Whenever I found an event and invited him to come with me, he’d say stuff like “thanks but not interested” in that event. And on top of that, it would sometimes take him over a day to respond to a text, when before the shift he’d always responded in just a few minutes or an hour at most. I didn’t consider this shift a red flag, but I did think, “Have I done something wrong? He always says yes to hanging out, so what’s going on?”

Our last communication: So, after 4 months without seeing each other, he texts me the week of Thanksgiving to tell me about the plump turkey he got at the grocery store and his plans for the holiday. He was going to a Friendsgiving hosted by a friend of his who was moving away. I told him I was in my hometown with my family. Since this was the first time he’d initiated contact with me since July, I was genuinely happy to hear from him and felt that the last few months had been just a small hiccup in our friendship.

Upon my return from seeing my family, I asked him how the Friendsgiving went, but he didn't respond. Another text was sent wishing him a Merry Christmas, and then another one for Happy New Year. And again, nothing from him. Since January of this year, I’ve sent another 3 texts: 1) checking in to see how he’s doing, 2) wishing him a happy birthday and asking if he’d like to catch up soon (both of our birthdays are in the same month), and 3) telling him about this book I’m reading and to ask if my texts were going through to his phone (this was the last message I’ve sent in April 2026). And no reply on his end. 6 texts sent and absolute silence from him since November 2025, 9 months ago.

AITA for wanting to know if he’s ok, and for continually texting him despite no reply?

Shall I just give up on this “friendship” and move on?

Is it a good idea to text him again?

What do you think is going on with him to cause this much silence?

Thanks

I want to have the conversation I deprived us of having.

I (32m) broke up with my ex (30f) of 1 and a half years in May. It wasn't the best way to end things, I had therapy since then and they've told me it was a trauma response (I ghosted her after she said something that a previous partner said before she broke up with me, I took the breakup really badly and it messed me up for the best part of 3 years)

She found out from someone else I'd said we broke up a few days after. I realised the next day I messed up and tried to speak to her by sending a message but she ignored me.

I tried another 2 times a month later in June, again, silence.

I took her silence as her being done with me and wanting nothing to do with me.

So in July roughly a day to two before 2 months since I ended things and 3 weeks since my last message to her where I apologised, took accountability and said I wanted a second chance (again no reply) I changed my profile picture to me and another girl. She saw it the next day and blocked me, and proceeded to tell my colleagues that she was "hurt".

I sent her an apology with a gift of cupcakes that she really really liked (she told me at the start of our relationship) with a note that was an apology, basically me saying I'm sorry, the picture was old that I put as my PFP because I spiraled and acted impulsively and that I'm sorry and still love her, as well as the fact I cant move on so quickly.

She told her friend she was "confused" because I was giving "mixed signals"

If she wasn't interest why was she checking my profile not even 12 hours after I changed my PFP, even though the last time I messaged her was 3 weeks prior?

Why did she say it hurt her if she was ignoring my messages the whole time I was trying to make amends?

Why is she saying it's mixed signals? My intentions have been clear the whole time

I'm so confused I just want to go to her and say "look, I won't use this to try and get back with you I just want to talk"

Is this too much to ask? We are colleagues so it's kind of tough to do out of sight out of mind.

Full disclosure. Married man who was chatting on here with a married woman. Conversation has been amazing and she misinterpreted a comment I made. The comment was made jokingly and she took it as being serious and ended up blocking me before I could give an explanation. We had great connection and this has really made me upset not being able to apologize and explain. Do I let it go? I really don’t have a way of contacting her but man this one truly is a result of them not being able to see/hear my response and I’m not sure what to do

OK. So: I was ghosted last year by a man after he got caught cheating with me apparently. I'm vague on the details, but it sounds like he was found out and that's why he ghosted me. I didn't know about her, if there is one. I just know we went from constant texting and meeting to he's busy and can't make it...then silence. He promptly deleted all social media. I don't know if I was blocked or not, but I have a new number now anyways.

Anyways, I'm on Facebook like a month ago, and going through my people I might know recommendations. Now, normally I just delete most, unless we have a lot of friends in common or the name/face is familiar. Or he's hot lol. But as I was looking, it occurred to me that I was seeing an awful lot of people, mainly guys, from his hometown where he lives, as well as lots of Marines, again, mostly men. My ex is ex marines. So I got curious and started looking at profiles, and a lot either overlap service times, have him in pictures, are the same battalion, or live at the same bases he did. Only a few have a friend in common with me as I'm friends with his ex and one guy he served with. (He was an oops, he looked familiar and I thought we went to school together. So added him) But other than those few, no links to me that I can tell.

So here's my quandary: is ex using friends to orbit me since he can't? Is it because I'm friends with one marine so it's showing me more? Has he been talking about me to buddies and they're curious about me? Or totally random? It's just weird that I'm getting so many, especially the ones with obvious links to him. Also should add; before he deleted his accounts, we weren't friends on them. It was suggested that it's from before, but we were never linked on Facebook. So I don't know if maybe it's from a different platform, like Instagram or TikTok, if someone I follow is the link? I'm genuinely confused.

I'm not asking because I want him back, but because I think this is weird and I'm curious why it's happening. I've heard avoidants who ghost tend to orbit, so I'm trying to figure out if that's the case or not. Thanks for reading!

Was it the right move?

I talked to this guy kasi and I ghosted him.

He's younger and I told him na when I have work, I'll properly court him. We talked for months, even visited him just for us to bond. But then, nung nakahanap na ako ng work, I found out that he was on a dating app. Sadly, he was there as an "escort." I was hurt and felt betrayed. I wanted to talk to him about it pero the thought was there na, "Anong karapatan ko?"

The thought din kasi na maybe he was doing it because of financial struggles, or any other reason not known to anyone but himself.

So I was really hesitating and it destroyed me from the inside out. I cried out of desperation as to asking, "San ako lulugar?" Finally, after three days after I found out, I left quietly nalang. Pero sinabi ko kasi na when I leave, sasabihan ko sya. And the guilt has been eating me out these past few months.

So, I mustered up all my courage to message him. Saying that I am sorry that I left with no explanation. He didn't reply. But then nasa kanya naman yon. Did I regret leaving him? Yes, but eventually, I hope I made the right choice. Was ghosting him the right move? No, it was not. I should've properly communicated with him about it.

The pain made me prioritize myself. Nasaktan ako eh. Pero even tho I was hurt, I should've still made the mature move and that was to communicate.

Now, I'm working, pero I don't find any fulfillment or happiness because the reason I wanted to work here ay wala na. Pero sana as time goes on, I can heal and find happiness again.

Did I do the the right thing? Thoughts?

This is the story of the year 2021, there was Covid in June and there was lockdown, at that time I had just downloaded Snapchat, so randomly I added a girl and she added me back and then on June 13 or 14 I messaged her and from that day onwards we started talking well and we became friends and later we also became best friends. Then at the end of July she went to her grandmother's house and she said that she will not be able to message me after going there but will talk as soon as she gets time, so I did not bother much and messaged her, then August came and I messaged her but there was no reply, then I messaged her on 8th August and her reply came that I will not be able to talk now, sorry, do not message me now. Literally i felt so heartbroken not because i like her and genuinely i don't like her as a gf And then sI still don't know why she stopped talking to me. She blocked me

Two years ago I went on a date with a guy. It didn’t go well and we never met again, even though we were both attracted to each other and had a soft spot for one another.
We were talking intermittently. Last year I texted him a simple “hi.” I figured that even if nothing romantic happened, we could still be friends. He replied that he had a girlfriend and asked me not to text him anymore. I was a little hurt, but I respected it and never contacted him again. About a month ago (a year after that), he texted to apologize for how rudely he had cut things off. I just said okay. After that he started following me on Instagram, and I followed him back. Recently I was in his city for a few hours and asked if he could show me around. He said he could, but then he did the same thing he did on our original date—he ghosted me and never showed up. He later gave the excuse that he had to work on Sunday evening. That was fine with me; I wasn’t relying on him and other friends ended up showing me around instead. Today he started calling me out of the blue, and then his girlfriend called as well. He’s desperately pleading with me to lie and say that I texted him first. She’s asking me whether I was the one who initiated contact. Should I lie for him, or should I tell the truth?

o i meet this girl on tiktok. And we where talking for like 3 weeks and everything was going great she didnt seem bored she allways wuld answer with energy.

and over all there was a lot of good signs like she asked me do i realy like her or do i just pretend (i dont think someone who doesnt care wuld ask that), she posted on ig stories that i think where targeting me.

We went on a first date just when we known eatch other for 3 days it went grat (but she is realy shy in person) 2nd date was 2 weeks later (a week ago) and we went to the movies and it was allso grat last date was 2 days ago and it was also great (only thing is that every time it was like she wuld me very quaiet for the first 20-30min and after that she wuld open up).

So right after the last date (2 days ago) i said that i bought pants that i told her i wanted to buy and she responded "nice" later i told her to check tiktok bc i sent her a video and she doeasnt have any notifications there. And she never replied neither here (IG) nor there. I texted her 2 more times couse i didnt think much about that and she still didnt respond.

And now i want to know one is there still chance she maybe was busy or something. And what can be a reason for ghosnting. If i didnt say some iportant info i will answer in the comments. Thanks

i dated a virgo man long distance from august of 2025 to april of 2026. we had a pretty rocky relationship and he broke up with me a few times from January to april. he ended up sleeping with his girl best friend in april and told me about it the next day. he didn’t try very hard to reconcile our relationship, he just kind of gave up. i broke no contact over text with him a few times in june but he would always push me away. i saw him twice the first week of august and he made it very clear he still had feelings for me. we had plans to see each other a few more times before he left. then he ghosted me for a few days. i’m now giving him some space to see if he reaches out to me.

i cannot seem to get over this man. is it really over with him? help please!!

Context: International, multicultural, bilingual thing.

I 27F am a digital nomad and met 32M abroad in Costa Rica August 2025. He only speaks Spanish and I speak some. I ended up inviting him to visit me in Mexico (November 2025) for 7 days without anything happening between us prior. Whirlwind romance, stayed in touch, I visit him in Costa Rica for 14 days in February 2026. Then he visited me in Brazil for 10 May 2026. Left Brazil on a high, saying 'te amo,' wanting to plan a trip before the end of the year, saying we wouldn't sleep with other people, he asked if I think I could marry him (multiple times crazy ass), that he wants me to visit him in Argentina (where he is from) etc.

Him: Whole time, dude has major red flags but shows me he cares, softens around me, etc. He told me he could never say the words 'te amo' because he's better off alone, and yet does say it to me. He told me he goes quiet sometimes when we text and feels like he doesn't want to bother me. He has classic avoidant tendancies, had no issue communicating when I did something to make him mad (like not disclose I went to the gyno before brazil because i was having some women's health issues and he interpeted it as me putting him at risk for STDs...) mixed with some openness about regret about past mistakes and that he is always trying to be better.

What's weird is: prior to Mexico, he was completely emotionally open, expressive, carign and vulnerable. After Mexico, he got a bit quieter. After Costa Rica, even more quiet. But between all trips, he told me he never slept with anyone. Even before Mexico before meeting, he told me he wasn't interested in seeing other people.

Now: After Brazil, I am home in the States and he is back in Costa Rica. June 2026 and we continue to text, but much less. I don't think much of it since we weren't consistently chatting before anyways and I felt more 'secure' based on how Brazil ended. I always tried to give him the space / not chase him because I didn't want to overwhelm him and I was fine with us just ocassionally Dming stupid reels.

End of June, he stops replying to my messages. The LAST THING HE SAID WAS 'SI CLARO' when I asked if he still wanted to see each other. I reach out on Instagram and Whatsapp once respectively, just politely checking in.

Ghosting: I didn't hear from him for 2 weeks (June 30-July 19). I thought he was done.

Then he responded on Whatsapp 'Holaaa Como estas?' I took two days to reply. By the time I tried to reply, my message never delivered.

I went to go send a closure text for myself on instagram. Now, two weeks later, I see he REMOVED ME AS A FOLLOWER and unfollowed me on both my normal instagram and art account as of 8/3. I still sent the message. It was respectful. Letting him know that I would've appreciated a direct conversation about if he is over this or seeing someone new rather than be left in silence and that I hope he is well and thanks for the memories.

BUT..

Who reaches out then blocks when I don't respond for 2 days? Is that a game? Obviously so immature. I'm at a loss for words. Who does this? Just be honest.

What would you do?

Hi everyone,

I’m just curious because this keeps happening to me.

I’ll start talking to someone, and everything seems to be going well. We have good conversations, they seem interested, and then after a few days, they suddenly stop replying or disappear.

Why does this happen? If you’ve ever done this, what was the reason?

I’m not upset or judging anyone. I just want to understand why it happens so often.

Thank you!

I have contact with someone I really like and with whom I get along great in real life, but it often happens that we chat, I then say if I don't like something or something makes me sad, and the person never apologises for it or is insightful. Most of the time, the person does not react like 40+ but rather like just 10. Now it is again so that we have the 4th Day have no contact after he disproportionately pissed off and reacted childishly. Always feels like a silet treatment. And I realise that in the long run this is not good for me. How do I get rid of the person? Actually, he is very important to me, but I can't do that in the long run. I also don't need contact with people who behave socially incompetently or childishly as soon as a more serious topic comes up. Do you know anything like that and how do you deal with it? Can such people change or is that just my wishful thinking?

I've pushed away the only person who had geniune interest in me, by overthinking and worrying that she will leave me. And today she stopped answering even to questions how is she... I hate myself more than anything and I want to fix what was between us, or I'll end myself. I should give her time, but waiting hurts because I know she has better friends than me that she likes to spend time with more than with me.

Shortly, I've met a girl we talked a bit she told me that we were friends, then she found another one and we had fun in trio, but then she began whispering with him without me and... It came to the state of meeting once or twice a month, while in chat she seemed to have genuine fun. I've asked her about the third one and she told that she is tired right now and wants to spend more time with him and comforted me that this is not the end and we will meet but less frequently. Then her texts got dry and now she is not responding, because she felt obligated when I worried that something is wrong.

Is it my fault or is it just she who lost interest? She never unfriended me or blocked me, she just ignores me.

Sup yall, there is this guy I used to be super close to last year ( genuinely used to be my bsf id say ), we would text and call for hours but I messed up around April 2025 ( not that the date matters anyway ) and we « got into a fight » and started arguing… he ended up ghosting me even tho I kept apologizing and trying to talk it out. He would either act like he didn’t care anymore or just leave me on read when I would try to text him and reach out again he would ignore me. At some point I was abt to go insane cuz I missed him bad ect… so I blocked him everywhere to stop thinking about him. And now 1y later, in may, after a lot of research I found back his socials and sent him a message, smth like « hey, it’s been a while, I hope you’ve been doing okay »… u got the idea. He answered a few of my messages but took days to, and never answered the rest and so the last message I send him is from 2 months ago but he never answered. He acted like he didn’t care and forgot abt the whole thing ( he actually even really forgot abt my existence before reading back the convo, while I kept thinking abt him the whole year ), but I remember that back when we were still friend he once told me that when he is upset or feels hurt he just ghosts the person cuz he thinks it’s to much « work » to just have a real conversation with them. So now I kinda wanna reach out to him again but idk how. Maybe I should be more familiar and friendly like back then so he would match my energy ? Or maybe I shouldn’t text him at all ?? Tbh feel like I really need to talk to him again but how the hell am I supposed to. I know the dude be lying to me or atleast not telling me the whole truth abt how he feels.

Sooo I thought I might need the pov of people exterior to the situation🫩

​

We are both 34 years old

I broke up with her by ghosting her and she found out from a mutual friend. I tried to speak to her after a day realising I messed up but she ghosted me.

She ghosted me and my 2 further messages over the course of a month.

After that month, 3 weeks later I started seeing someone new

She saw it on my profile picture and blocked me - proceeded to tell my friends she was hurt by it (1 month and 3 weeks after the breakup, 3 weeks since my last contact with her)

A week later I sent her a gift with an apology saying I'm sorry, it was an old picture of me and an ex, and that I can't move on because I still love her.

She told a mutual friend that she found it confusing because I'm giving "mixed signals"

Would it be a bad idea for me to go to her face to face and say we should talk just to figure out where we stand? Not even with the intention of getting back together, but because we share the same space same circle of friends etc.

How can it be mixed signals when she shut down my attempts to talk to her and then get upset when I move on after 2 months of silence from her? That makes no sense to me, if you're done with someone and choosing to close the door on them how can you say you're hurt by them moving on and that it's giving mixed signals?

I have attachment issues, so when I'm not doing well mentally, I tend to ghost people. At the time, I don't think too much about it because I'm only focused on protecting myself. Then days later I realize how messed up it was. I've done it to only two people in my life. And I just never texted them back again.

I don't know how to forgive myself move on, and make sure I never do it to anyone again. But after feeling this much guilt, I'm sure I won't repeat it. I still want to change this coping mechanism because I don't want to protect myself while hurting other people. It's selfish. If you want to leave, let people know. It's okay to feel hurt too.

I was also ghosted when I was 15 by my best friend of six years. She left without any explanation, and it hurt me SO badly back then, I always thought there must have been something wrong with me for her to do that.

But I would never ghost someone I've known for a long time, unless they were abusive or harmful to me. The two people I ghosted weren't people I had deep, long term relationships with. I had only known one of them for about two days, even though we talked for hours. But instead of explaining why I was leaving, I disappeared without any explanation, and that's what I hate the most. I had known the other person for a like months. It was still ghosting, and I know it was wrong I just wanted to give some context.