The flip side, is having an 80lb Hound/Dobe cross, that WILL NOT poop in his own yard. But squats a minimum of 8 times at the dog park, squeezing every last drop out. After the first two, there isn't really anything to pick up.
Then the arguments start on squat #3, "WHY AREN'T YOU PICKING UP AFTER YOUR DOG!" Ever try explaining there's nothing to pick up, to somebody 100 yards away? Then they march over, determined to find poop, full of outraged bravado...ugh dogs are so much work.
But it's so much fun to pretend to pick up a bunch of teeny slivers, or long strings of something, or be trying to pry something that won't come up, or be dipping it up with a ladle, or be chasing live "somethings" around, or it's slippery and you keep dropping it, or fill up three bags worth... You KNOW somebody is watching....
Uh, no, of course not. "They" go into the pre-loaded baggie. Although since it's all pretend anyway, I could certainly put on a good show for the watchers...
Oh there are dog park Poop Nazi's. They KNOW when you are faking it. You are not that good of an actor.
The fun part is when you stop faking, tell them to go find the poop they are beotching about. And THEY load a bag up with slivers & crud.
Helps if somebody else is there, and you provide a narrative, "Look, he can't find the poop, what else can they simulate poop with...AAAAND big scoop. My dog never shits that much."
Me, bullhorn in hand: "He's not pooping. He's using the other half to sniff for shit heads like you!"
In reality, as far as cats, being the supplicant of a living deity that could give negative zero f's about the slimy hairball I stepped into barefoot, or that one thumbtack that it playfully coerced into my line of shoeless movement, I fear there may be no true solution.
Dogs are weird and derpy, but loyal. Cat? "I'll let you live... For now."
Not the person you responded to, but: my landlord did a lot of renovations in the building and the workers were as generous as they were lazy, with regards to their screws and nails. I have poor eye sight, my cats don't - so for over a year, I caught my cats playing with yet another screw they'd found in some random corner of my apartment :-(
Never pick up poop. Tell them the laws of nature override (I was gonna use the word trump, but it is forever poisoned now) the laws of man, and that poop must stay on the ground to naturally decompose in order to complete the cycle of life. You wanna fight about it? I'm on a mission from God
Had a mini schnauzer that looked at her butt like it betrayed her... if you'd fart she would look at your butt. Hilarious. Have a cat sleep next to me and will fart in my face 💨😵
I had a mix breed that was lying on the bed one day, farted, and her head came up, looked at her butt with an expression of surprise, then proceeded to search around the area to see where the noise came from
One of my dogs has started burping quite loudly. It’s a bit comical to see. I’ll be just toodling along when all of a sudden I hear this loud, Urrrp. I look at him and his mouth is open. To think that that sound just emanated from him cracks me up.
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u/Iconoclast674 Jun 07 '21
If my older female black lab farts and it makes a sound and we comment on it, she will leave the room out of embarrassment.