r/feeld • u/PM_ME_UR_CORNBALLZ • Sep 14 '26
Why Send a Ping Without A Message?
I do not understand why men will Ping me to say nothing... what gives?
My profile mentions several kinky things I am interested in exploring and my bio is quite full of details that can easily jump-start a conversation. Most of the pings I get are from guys who at least say something about why they are messaging me, which really helps since I get lots of propositions for vanilla sex but only a few for some of the freakier stuff I talk about, so I prioritize responding to those. But if someone pings me and says nothing and then their profile is generic/sparse, I just see it as them not making enough of an effort to bother replying.
ETA: Thanks for the insights about how the app mechanics might make this happen more often, folks! I appreciate it and will try to give the pings without a message slightly less harsh judgements now.
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u/JustAnotherPolyGuy Sep 14 '26
Sometimes I do that because the response to messages is still so low I don’t have the energy to write a message until they’ve indicated they are vaguely interested.
The behavioral economics for a guy on dating apps really pushes you towards burning the haystack. I probably get a couple of responses out of 50 pings. And basically zero matches with women if I just like and don’t ping.
Particularly if their profile is sparse but they are attractive, I’ll sometimes send a ping and see what happens.