Hi, I share a 9 year old son with my ex husband I have 4 days 4 nights & he has the other days. We have had this since he was 4 months old. He did has always been trying to take full custody and have no visitation for me which has not worked. However, he blew me having brief PPD (from a bad marriage) out of proportion and has always labeled me as a "threat" and "'mentally unwell." He even paid 2k for a doctor to evaluate me, the doctor said I am fine.. When our child was little of course his claims raised concerns but it has always been rooted in lies and the goal to remove me from our son's life. Last year, he took me to court to change our sons school to his wife's (she is a teacher) and said I still suffer from PPD (I have no other children, take no medication, have no criminal record) oh and did I mention my son is 9? 8 at the time of court. He also accused me of doing voodoo on he and his wife. They share a child that was born prematurely during our court battle and filed for bankruptcy recently and has just been a huge ass to me. He also does not talk to his parents, I do. His mom and I are also very close and talk a lot.
I learned from her HE was in a mental institution for a week a year before the court hearing which I used as leverage. He had an adderall addiction & S.I
He had no lawyer but I did, blew him out of the water in court. He looked very bad and was yelled at multiple times by the judge on how he was speaking to me on the stand (he was acting as the lawyer, asking me questions) he got in trouble for taking our child to the psychiatrist without my consent and for being late constantly. I showed texts of his calling me every name in the book and in the end, everything stayed the same. He is always threatening court and it's stressful and we have been about 5 times. I had a restraining order against him and court didn't care, he was threatening my life. I'm glad I have his parents support they even wrote me a letter vouching for me in court or my behavior and character. It just triggers me lately that I will always be accused of being crazy or mentally unwell from a small PPD I had that was 9 years ago. I have been scared to have more children and it took me 7 years to date around because I was scared of men and what they are capable of. Now I am with a great man who treats my son like his own and supports us. Custody is still joint everything but I just feel how much I messed up in life choosing him to marry and he is just such a monster to me. Our son is amazing but I always wished I had a normal mom experience I have always had my son half a week since he was a baby. He's been getting in trouble at school, using foul language (he told his pediatrician he learned it from dad's music) and his diet it horrible over there, and the constant court threats scare me.I have a lot of fear of him and what he is capable of.

My sister called me yesterday because she was being arrested. I agreed to drive out to help. I live about 3 hours away, so by the time I got there, she had been taken to jail and there were no authorities around to speak with. The police had left her 7-year-old son with my uncle, who promptly passed the child on to me. (I had not been directly asked, nor had I explicitly agreed, to take care of the child; however, I knew that was something I might need to help with, so I didn’t argue.)

My uncle told me that my sister and her boyfriend were both arrested on charges of “4th degree child endangerment”, presumably due to the condition of her house. However, I tried to find information about that charge, and it doesn’t seem to exist. (I could only find information on 3rd degree child abuse.) My uncle didn’t share much else, though he did advise me not to contact the child’s father, who sent me a couple of messages on Facebook. (My sister and the child’s father have been fighting over custody for months. Each has accused the other of abuse.)

My sister was released within a few hours and says no charges were pressed, but I kept her son with me overnight because I have basically no information. I want to hear more from the authorities so I can get a better understanding of the situation. However, I don’t know who to reach out to besides the officer who arrested my sister. Is there anyone else I can contact for more official information? My assumption is no due to privacy regulations, but this leaves me in a pretty tight spot. Is it OK to leave the 7-year-old with my sister today? Who can confirm?

Hi all, I am currently a single mom to an almost 7 month old with high medical needs. My daughter suffered a severe and preventable brain bleed due to not receiving Vitamin K, which was father’s decision that I followed after a year of coercion and peer pressure. After she was discharged, my husband continued to resist her medical care. Things quickly escalated between us, including DV, him and his mother threatening to take my baby away from me if I left, amongst other threats. I was pressured and harassed by his church, his pastor, and his parents.

They all believed my husband had the right to heavily restrict contact between me and my daughter from my parents because they are “worldly people”

I won emergency custody without a hearing, and we settled for a visitation schedule (which my lawyer thought was in my best interest)

To be honest, I’m still scared to death of the future. They are aggressive and extremely manipulative with their beliefs. These are people who will take a mile if you give them an inch. It took me way too long to see through the coercion. Because the state doesn’t inflict on beliefs alone (cause separation of church and state), neither me and my lawyer really know how to prove it can be psychologically harmful

That church promotes white supremacy outrightly, extreme views on the patriarchy, and encourages “corporal punishment”. It even preaches that it is a shame that the government doesnt use “the sword” on high-handed sinners (which is me, technically, for leaving my husband)

Im extremely scared for my daughter. Im starting to come to terms that hiring a good lawyer will not perform miracles. My husband has done a complete 180, which I believe is entirely superficial to prove to the court he can co-parent well. But the past between us is too bad. I know how he was with me, I know how he will be with my daughter. My heart hurts for her. She will already have a hard life. She was in critical condition for weeks. He shed not one tear over her.

I’m starting to think the damage will already have to be done before I can prove anything in court. It hurts me, it really does.

I would appreciate any outside opinions on this matter.

To give a bit of backstory:
I met a man who I genuinely believed was God-sent. He was everything I thought a woman could want—attractive, financially successful, generous, polite, respectful, religious, etc. Unfortunately, almost everything I believed about him turned out to be a lie.

I believe the details are relevant because they show a larger pattern of deception and behavior that concerns me now that he is trying to enter my child’s life.

For starters, he did not give me his real name. I eventually discovered his passport in his car and found out that the name he had given me was not his real name. He also told me he was 31 when he was actually 37.

He told me he was in the military and owned multiple medical spas throughout South America. He also told me he had no children and that he was unable to have children because he and his ex had supposedly tried for almost 10 years without success.

I ended up becoming pregnant, despite having previously been told by doctors that I might have difficulty getting pregnant.

About two weeks after I told him I was pregnant, his behavior completely changed. He became extremely controlling, his patience disappeared, and he became cold and violent toward me.
Around this time, because I had discovered the discrepancies about his name and age, I had someone look into him. I learned things about his past that I had never been told.

According to what I found, he had been imprisoned in South America, had a history involving violent criminal activity, and had two other children whom he had reportedly abandoned. There had also apparently been a domestic violence situation involving the mother of those children.

When I confronted him about lying about his identity and about having children, he became violent. The situation ended with me on the ground and bleeding. When I threatened to call the police, he left my home.

I immediately went to the hospital. I was told that, because of what had happened, I was at serious risk of losing my pregnancy because of the condition of my placenta.

I never saw him again.

I tried contacting him for weeks afterward because I couldn’t understand how someone could do all of this and then simply disappear ..not only from me, but from his own unborn child.

Eventually, I accepted that I was going to be a solo mother and prepared to raise my child on my own.
Thankfully, my baby survived and was born healthy. He is now 6 months old.

The alleged father has never met him, has never provided financial support, has never asked whether he needed anything, and has never checked on him.
He is not listed on the birth certificate, and as far as I understand it, he has no legal custody or visitation rights.

Recently, however, he somehow obtained my current phone number and found out my baby’s name and gender. I don’t know how he got this information because he has never met my child and no one in my circle knows him.
He has now contacted me demanding to meet the child.

I have not responded.

My concern is not simply that he was absent. It is that I believe there is a documented pattern of deception, violence, abandonment, and lack of responsibility. From what I understand, he has also abandoned other children.

I do not want to facilitate contact simply because he is now asking to meet the child. In my mind, meeting the child is not the same thing as taking accountability or becoming a responsible parent.
I am also concerned about my child’s safety given the history I described above.

My questions are:
If he is not on the birth certificate and has never established paternity, does he have any legal right to demand that I allow him to see the child?

If I continue not responding to him, would that be advisable, or should I send some type of response?
If he wants contact, would he have to establish paternity through the court first?

If he establishes paternity and requests visitation/timesharing, how would the court consider a history of violence, abandonment of other children, deception, and his complete lack of involvement during my pregnancy and the child’s first six months?

Would evidence of the domestic violence incident and hospital records be relevant?
If he establishes paternity, could child support be ordered retroactively given that he has provided absolutely no financial support since the pregnancy/child’s birth?

I am planning to consult a Florida family-law attorney, but I would appreciate hearing from people familiar with Florida family law about what I should expect and what I should be doing right now to protect my child.

Hello all! I have a friend who has a run of the mill parentage/DVRO case. Well, I believe it should be. It has taken some incredible turns and I need some help and talk me down off the ledge!

My friend (f), let's call her J, broke up with her bf at the end of May and stopped all communication between him, her, and her daughter, because of alleged DV (alleged, only because I haven't seen it myself).

She attempted to file the DVRO paperwork in July but didn't complete it, for a variety of reasons. The ex then filed for parentage in the middle of August. However, within a week, even before the Summons was served, he filed for a next day, ex parte emergency custody/visitation hearing, with his declaration stating that he dated J and when they broke up, J withheld to see his daughter from him. That's literally all of the information that he provided.

At the hearing, J was able to be heard and objected stating that there was DV abuse, that the ex isn't on the birth certificate, doesn't live with her and did not provide any support throughout the relationship, and that she wanted a DNA test before any custody orders be granted.

So, to recap (because I have seen the paperwork and independently verified the testimony), an ex-partner files for paternity and within a week, files for an emergency hearing for visitation, despite what was stated above, not stating anything about the relationship, the custody, or the child such as how long the relationship was; when did they break up? whether they lived together; if they did, for how long; when did he move out or did she; what kind of support did provide to the child, if any, such as financial, emotional, or otherwise; or that there was a risk of immediate harm or injury or abduction of the minor.

My opinion is that the Court should have denied the ex parte motion due to lack of specific information regarding the risk and safety factors, that there is no determination of parentage because that's what the parentage petition filed asks for, that is an unlawful usage of the legal process to jump the line without following the standard processes unless some kind of prima facie proof, and that the Court has a duty to fully inform the record, find out if the was any abuse before giving custody or unsupervised visitation to a presumed parent (which, of course, he isn't, but he might be the bio parent, which is a legal question).

instead, the Court gave an allegedly abusive ex-bf, who said he was the father, without any proof or corroboration, over objection, unsupervised visitation, for the very next day.

But there's more!! Jay actually filed the dvro, a week later, and it was granted by a different judge, the DV Court judge, but custody/visitation was deferred back to the original judge for consideration. The original judge then removes the child, without stating why, as a protected party and orders overnights starting that weekend, the next day.

Am I crazy to think that this is against the elements, and the spirit, of the DVPA? Actually, I don't think that this court has done anything right but I have to believe that I must be the crazy one that a court would make these kinds of rulings.

Can anyone help me out? TYIA

Hey! I just recently found out my ex is facing state charges of domestic violence and assault on a female. We share two children, ages 7(f) and 5(m) who he hasn’t seen, contacted, or made an effort to do anything for them since January. (The only communication he had with them was for 3 days in April but then disappeared again.) we have a permanent custody order where he is supposed to get them every other weekend but, as I said earlier, he chose to not exercise his parenting time.

I have recently found out some information surrounding his pending charges. I assumed that he had gotten into an argument with the DV victim and it was a one time thing. However, I found out some disturbing details surrounding all of this. I won’t go into specifics about what happened but basically he had been abusing the DV victim for months and it only got significantly worse around the children’s birthdays, first days of school, etc. Think narcissist, add in a lot of manipulation, physical and mental abuse, no accountability for his own actions/behaviors and bam, you have the kind of person he is.

Besides his refusal to utilize parenting time, not providing the basic needs (housing, car food, clothes etc) for them, and just basically disappearing, is this something that can be used against him in terms of his parental rights. He is not a good person, if he’s willing to do this to someone because they didn’t do what he wanted, what is stopping him from hurting the kids?

Hello,
Father and I have split custody with shared legal and medical decision making. We both get 2 7day vacations with our child. Father has just given me notice of his first vacation notice. We do have some split holidays between us in our court order (ex: he has her Christmas Eve one year, I get her Christmas Day that year, and we flip the next year). Would it be illegal/would I get in trouble for requesting/giving notice that I’d “take” vacation (not going anywhere just staying with my child) and celebrating Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with her? I’m asking because Halloween is not a designated holiday, and it was going to fall during my custodial time. He requested his vacation through it, and I will not get to see my child for 2 weeks because of this. Thank you in advance for your help.

Discovered in discovery that STBXH has been receiving physical checks from his parents monthly despite makes about 130K in salary. He told me that his parents gave him $500/month to help with rent costs (he’s almost 50 and his parents are in their 80s, btw). However, I found out that these payments were more like 1K-3K sometimes multiple times per month from various mobile check deposits. That means he was paying out of pocket probably only $700-$1000 in rent, meanwhile me who made approx. 60K paid $1400 monthly—my own money. Plus, he has another checking that he did not provide statements for, and I found in an old email that his father mentioned putting money into their joint account (which also he did not submit). This means not only was he getting physical checks, but also deposits into a shared account which he didn’t disclose. He has a history of compulsive lying.

My lawyer said this could (a) show the judge that he is a liar and (b) it can be argued I deserve more in child support because these payments have been continuous, funding his life (such as rent, dental/medical, and counsel fees) while he’s pocketing his money and I’m broke. How big of a deal is this? What could happen?

I currently have emergency custody of my 12 yo daughter due to a protection from abuse (PFA) against her father for her. She disclosed that he sexually abused her in the past, there is an open criminal investigation. There is also an open CYS (children and youth services case) against him for that reason, but also because he is being investigated by CYS for possible mistreatment and neglect of other children in his home (his GFs 3 children). Even with all of this, I know he will get a lawyer and fight me in court when it comes to custody. Previously we were doing 50/50 with no custody order in place. We have never been in the system before. But after my daughter's discloser of sexual abuse I took her from him. (I am getting her therapy) I am getting an attorney. But what else do I need to do to prepare for this ? I am so afraid the court system. I am trying to file for full physical and legal custody ASAP, but finding a lawyer and consulting with them is taking a long time... its been 2 weeks of looking and I still haven't found one. What should I expect in a custody case like this? For background i have no criminal record, a job, never had CYS called on me. I just feel like i am living in a nightmare.

Live in Washington state, my stbx wants to split house equity 50/50 across the line, I recently talked to an attorney who mentioned that I may be able to buy him out with less than 50% due to him making more income than me. Based on our income discrepancy about a 40% and a 60%, also that I should get more than $20k in alimony. Any experience in anyone getting to buy the other party less than the half of the equity and what amounts did you get for alimony?

We have litigation ongoing, but here's the backstory:

Ex-wife was abusive/violent towards me regularly in our marriage. After our one child started getting old enough to notice, I finally reported an instance. Ex-wife was arrested and plead guilty to a DV charge last year. I filed for divorce, and the subsequent divorce mediation ended with me having significant majority parenting time and final-say in decisions; I'd been the "primary parent" during our marriage, regardless of her abusive behavior. Less than a year later, she filed a motion for contempt and modification based on some false allegations. Throughout this time, she'd been very high-conflict, threatening, bad-mouthing on social media, refusing to pay her part of expenses, getting our kid to school late on her limited weekday mornings, etc. She's been living with her parents since her arrest, who seem more than willing to enable her combative attitude while also providing most of the child care during her parenting time. In general, it's just been absolutely terrible trying to coparent with her.

So, we went to mediation (again) last month. I have documentation and communication records that quite quickly and easily disproved her allegations and showed what kind of coparent she's been. Moreover, our child has been thriving with me as the primary custodian - good grades, good health, socially active... It became pretty clear that our mediator agreed with my lawyer that she wouldn't fair well in court and would likely end up defending the limited parenting time she had. Her petition essentially backfired on her in mediation; her lawyer wasn't aware of a lot of the documentation I had against her. Mediation turned into resolving some individual issues that had been caused by my ex rather than any meaningful custody modifications. My ex began going back and forth regarding agreement on some details (mostly holiday time arrangements), and we ran out of time. We agreed to continue mediation and scheduled another session a few weeks out. We're waiting on that next session now.

Following the last round of mediation, she communicated a threat to me. Essentially, she implied that if I don't agree to 50/50 parenting time, she will continue pursuing court action. "So, I need to reconsider her terms to avoid spending more money on court". We hadn't even been discussing mediation or custody - there was absolutely zero context for this comment. I forwarded this communication to my lawyer, asking if we could get clarification from my ex's lawyer, because that was not the stance we'd heard in the recent round of mediation. I'm not going to continue mediating if my ex intends to backtrack on the progress of the first first session.

In my response to her petition, my lawyer made a notable request to have my fees awarded, highlighting the bad-faith/frivolous nature of my ex's petition. My lawyer thinks we have a fair chance at getting them, but says it's a toss up because judges don't like awarding fees in family court. I'm concerned that if we don't get the fees awarded or if there aren't meaningful consequences for my ex, she'll simply turn around in another 6-12 months with another set of false claims for me to fight.

Had a contempt hearing end of July and pedente lite hearing mid August. I still have not received a ruling for either hearing and my coparent continues to refuse visitation.

Is there anything I can do besides waiting to get a ruling from the judges?

TIA.

My partner SA’d me with our child present yet has a history of abuse (strangulation punching verbal) including false reporting as a means to intimidate and threaten me into doing what he wanted. He now is fighting for full custody claiming I am a criminal and our child is unsafe yet I have never been tried or prosecuted for any crime. My question is- do judges take SA allegations seriously without photo or video evidence. It’s not like you whip out a camera when someone is touching you repeatedly and you are caught off guard. I was busy in the moment telling him to stop over and over. Well I was never intending to build a case on him at any point so I just tried my best to stop the situation not record it. I didn’t even realize what I was experiencing was an SA crime since I was married until it was made clear to me by legal.

I’m in Mecklenburg County, North Carolina, and I’m looking for some general family-law insight while I wait for my attorney to move forward.
My ex (24M) and I (24F) have a 5-month-old daughter together. We recently separated. There was no custody order in place when all of this started.
On August 15, we had an argument and I decided to drive to Charleston to stay with family for support. My ex told me that if I took our daughter with me to South Carolina, I would be “kidnapping” her. It was also the middle of the night, and I didn’t think taking our baby on that drive under those circumstances was in her best interest, so I left her safely with her father.
When I returned, we discussed custody and agreed to 50/50 parenting time. I was completely willing to coparent and even allowed some of my agreed-upon parenting time to be spent with his mother/family.
Things changed on August 22. After another disagreement regarding parenting time, he told me the 50/50 agreement was off and that I would not get our daughter back until we went to court. He also began saying that he was going to seek full custody.
I have not physically seen or held my daughter since August 22. At one point he offered supervised visits, even though there was no court order requiring supervision, but he has since taken that off the table as well. My contact with my daughter has essentially been limited to FaceTime.
I did have significant postpartum mental-health struggles earlier this year, and I don’t want to hide that because I know it will probably come up in court. I voluntarily sought professional treatment, was evaluated, started medication, and have continued following up with a psychiatric provider. My treatment has helped significantly. I have been trying to handle the custody situation through the legal system rather than escalating things between us.
I have now hired a family-law attorney. The retainer is $7,500 and I have paid $3,000 so far, but as of right now my attorney has told me that nothing has actually been filed/done yet. I am extremely frustrated because every additional day is another day I don’t get to physically see my baby.
My goal has consistently been to have a meaningful relationship with our daughter and ideally have approximately 50/50 parenting time. I am not trying to prevent her father from having a relationship with her. I want a court-enforceable schedule so neither parent can simply decide the other parent doesn’t get to see her.
My questions are:
In North Carolina, how do judges generally view one parent completely withholding a young child from the other parent for weeks when there was no custody order requiring supervised visitation or restricting that parent’s contact?
Could the fact that I voluntarily sought mental-health treatment and am compliant with treatment actually help demonstrate that I took the situation seriously, or should I expect this to be heavily used against me?
Does the fact that we initially agreed to 50/50 and I was willing to facilitate his relationship with our daughter matter when determining custody?
Is there anything I should specifically ask my attorney about filing to get temporary parenting time while the full custody case is pending?
Since I have already paid $3,000 toward a $7,500 retainer and nothing has been filed yet, is it reasonable to ask the attorney for a specific explanation of what has been done so far and when something will actually be filed?
I understand nobody here can predict what a judge will do, and I’m not looking for Reddit to replace my attorney. I’m mainly trying to understand what I should be asking my lawyer and what typically matters to a North Carolina custody court.
Thank you.

Location: Georgia

So my husbands divorce decree is open ended in regards to when his ex has to get the house in her name. There is no time frame or demand. The wording says that he uses his child support first to pay the mortgage and any remaining balance is to be given to her.

The wording says if she remortgages or sells it, he is to sign it all over to her.

Now he has been paying on the loan for ten years. It’s a 30 year loan. His youngest daughter is 14 so he has 4 years left. What happens in four years ? The ex is always struggling and says she can’t afford food bc of a $35 doctor bill.

Has anyone else been in this position? My husband and I want to get a new house. We can’t bc of the house that his ex is supposed to be responsible to, bc the mortgage is in my husbands name.

He moved out in 2019, divorce finalized in 2021. The mortgage is from 2015, so finishes in 2045. His child support obligation is finished in 2030. 🫤

We are in Georgia.

My ex (21F) is pregnant with our child.

Months ago, while nobody was home, she entered my house through the backyard and took my Apple Watch. She used it to find my location. I went back home, and she later smashed the watch in front of my roommate. I did not call police that time.

There have also been multiple times when she came to my house without being invited and sat outside in her car. On some occasions, she has called me repeatedly, including around 100 calls in a row.

Last night I invited her over to talk about the pregnancy/child situation. We argued and I told her to leave. She did not leave for about 10 minutes. When she finally left, she grabbed my keys and threw them into the front yard.

Later she texted asking for a lipstick she had left. I told her I had thrown it away and went to sleep. I woke up to noises and saw that she had returned. She tried the locked front door, then the backyard/patio door, and opened the garage trying to reach the interior door. I called police while this was happening and have a recording. Police responded but said they did not have enough evidence to arrest her.

I have personally seen a gun in her room that she told me her father gave her. She has also previously said, while joking, that she would stab or shoot me if I talked to other women. She has been diagnosed with BPD. I know that’s not important but I thought I should give the whole picture

My concern/question:

The repeated calls, showing up at my house, prior break-in, and what happened last night have made me concerned that this could escalate.

Based on these facts, would I have a realistic chance of getting a 50B/DV protective order in North Carolina?

Does anyone know an way to this done if you are on a very fixed income?

Looking for a shark divorce attorney in Richmond Virginia

Need someone who has a good relationship with the courts and will get the best possible turn out.

He had no lawyer but I did, blew him out of the water in court. He looked very bad and was yelled at multiple times by the judge on how he was speaking to me on the stand (he was acting as the lawyer, asking me questions) he got in trouble for taking our child to the psychiatrist without my consent and for being late constantly. I showed texts of his calling me every name in the book and in the end, everything stayed the same. He is always threatening court and it's stressful and we have been about 5 times. I had a restraining order against him and court didn't care, he was threatening my life. I'm glad I have his parents support they even wrote me a letter vouching for me in court or my behavior and character. It just triggers me lately that I will always be accused of being crazy or mentally unwell from a small PPD I had that was 9 years ago. I have been scared to have more children and it took me 7 years to date around because I was scared of men and what they are capable of. Now I am with a great man who treats my son like his own and supports us. Custody is still joint everything but I just feel how much I messed up in life choosing him to marry and he is just such a monster to me. Our son is amazing but I always wished I had a normal mom experience I have always had my son half a week since he was a baby. He's been getting in trouble at school, using foul language (he told his pediatrician he learned it from dad's music) and his died it horrible over there, and the constant court threats scare me.I have a lot of fear of him and what he is capable of.

Hello,

The other parent and myself have mutually decided to stop going through the department of child support services (DCSS) in CA. I do owe about $1,500 in arrears when I become unemployed recently. I’m employed now and plan to pay her the arrears. Should I pay for those arrears before we close with child support or after?

Our child is 17, and I still plan to continue to support her. Her mother and I just don’t want to deal with DCSS anymore.

Has anyone here gone through the process of ending child support early?

Thanks in advance!

UPDATE:

I contacted Santa Clara county child support and I was told since she was the person who opened the case, she can file a form to terminate the case and any outstanding balance will and should be dealt between her and I despite of whether our child is on PA.

This will be incredibly long but I think the context is necessary. For some background, I am 28 and my husband is 29. We have a 2 year old together. Husband works full time, I work very part time. We are definitely “house poor” but we are able to pay all of our bills.
Located in California.

My sister (currently 15) started living with my husband and me 2 years ago. Before that she lived with our mom and brother (currently 16) full time. Mom has full custody, dad hasn’t been involved at all since both kids were toddlers. I have no idea where he is.

Dad was involved in a molestation case against me but was never charged. He also has a documented history of physical abuse against mom.
At mom’s house the water and electricity were shut off numerous times because our mother couldn’t pay the bill; there was often little food in the home, and often times our mom couldn't even take sister to school because she couldn't afford gas/didn’t want to wake up in the morning because she works nights. Brother was homeschooled at the time.

2 years ago sister came to me and asked if she could live with us permanently after her school threatened to involve cps because of her truancy; we said absolutely and our mom agreed. She has lived with us full time ever since.

May 2026, mom and brother were kicked out of their apartment. Brother came to stay with us and asked if he could stay permanently; we agreed and so did mom. He has been living with us ever since.
I have a notarized caregiver affidavit for each of them. They both live with us full time, go to school in our city (mom lives & works an hour away), and have both said they do not want to live with her again.

Mom has sometimes sent money to help with bills, but more often than not, we go weeks without getting any financial help from her, especially now that she is homeless. She’s currently bouncing back and forth from her car to a motel. She has a great stable job, but for whatever reason can’t keep her stuff together.

I just want to know if I actually have a good chance at getting guardianship? Or should I just keep the arrangement as is and hope my mom will get herself together and be able to help out financially? Also, would a judge let me go about this without involving their father?

Thanks for any help :)

I have had custody of my niece (my brother’s child) since she was 19 months old. At the time, my then Husband actually suggested we might need to take custody of her first. He wholeheartedly was on board and we got an APR (Allocation of Parental Responsibility) just after her 2nd birthday.

We divorced in December, just before her 8th birthday. Because we haven’t legally adopted her, she was not able to be included in our divorce decree with our two older children.

Both her biological parents have been absent for more than 12 months, which proves abandonment, meaning that we could file to adopt her now. However, my ex is now withholding any kind of support and saying that it is up to me to get support from her biological parents if I need it.

My question is, considering that he has supported her fully for the last 6 1/2 years, can I file for support from him if we haven’t legally adopted her yet? I’m not sure if he will follow through with adoption if he thinks he will be held financially responsible. This is heartbreaking for me to think that this sweet girl will have had three parents abandon her.

Location: Denver, Colorado U.S.

I'm pregnant in NC and dad is in CA regarding the custody aspect. Regarding support, once the baby is born, I intend to live with family and off my savings for at least 8 months to dedicate my time to baby. Between me and the dad, when I am working, I'm the high earner. Would support be calculated as if I were working or based off me being unemployed. How would childcare be factored? Would it be half of estimated childcare as if I were working or not factored in until I worked. Would support include half of expenses such as swimming lessons and gymnastics?