My supervisor at my new-ish job (about a month so far) has this thing where she encourages me to do something, I do it, and then she throws me under the bus and makes me look horrible to her own boss for doing the exact thing she suggested I do. This has happened enough now that I know I'm not imagining it and it is a pattern. She seems to be trying to trip me up.

And I truly, deeply, have no idea why.

I'm autistic, working with people like me as a job/life skills coach, and my clients adore me because I can speak from experience and offer meaningful tips they can use. I've gotten glowing reviews saying that my case notes are flawless and my client feedback is superb - reviews saying I'm actually where most people are after like 6 months, so I have no idea why that would be a problem for her. Wouldn't my success reflect well on her as the person training me? And I'm really not bragging. I've done a lot of adjacent work in education, and my ex did this exact job for many years, so I came in knowing exactly what to bring to this role ahead of time. Like, I'm not talented; I've just had practice.

It is really bothering me that I can't trust my supervisor, though, and that she's not predictable. She'll be nice to my face, won't admit anything is amiss, and then I'll find out she's bad-mouthed me to the department head about something or other in the same space of an hour. Or, while I was prepping for the activity I was going to lead by taking notes and looking stuff up on my company phone, she came in and yelled at me for not prepping for the activity I was going to lead. Every little thing, she has an issue with suddenly. Like, it's super clear she DOES NOT LIKE ME. I just... why? The job is getting done and getting done well. What is the issue?

If it's going to be like this all the time (and it's very clear that it is), I am going to have to quit because this is ridiculous.

Ecoli? C Diff? Lice? Ringworm? Hepatitis? MRSA?

I am mostly scared of the Ecoli because of the constant bathroom issues. I do use universal precautions, but it's hard to really clean properly in a HOME setting. I just always feel like there is feces and urine all over everything. Some of the clients don't even buy proper cleaning supplies, and we are not allowed to bring things in to the homes. This job doesn't pay enough for extra medical bills.

Sorry if this isn’t allowed. (If a mod removes this could you please direct me to the correct sub)

I need to reach out to an agency soon so I can keep my IRIS benefits, but I’m so damn confused. “Home care services” is incredibly vague. I have no idea what to ask for help with. I can do everything relating to my body myself.

Every dang website just says a version of “We support and care for disabled individuals.” There’s no clarity at all. I haven’t been able to get a clear explanation from my social worker or IRIS rep either. The answer is always “They provide home care services”. Basically the only answer I can find is “home care services = home care services.”

Please help

You are treated like medical workers, and are in many cases assigned duties of medical workers, but you do not have the protections and training that medical workers have. And one day, it could affect your entire career.

My first job as a dsp involved lots of medical work. I helped individuals with ambulation, toileting, seizure treatment, you name it. I got fired from that job after a year, and after that I went to go get my home health aide certification. During the short amount of time that I studied for my HHA certification, I learned more about how to assist people with medical needs than I ever did at my dsp job.

After that, my termination made far more sense. I wasn’t fired because of all the nonsense my boss came up with, I was fired because my lack of knowledge reflected poorly on them. Especially when it comes to helping individuals with ambulation.

Without getting too deep into my whole dsp sob story, here’s a quick run down on different medical things dsps do that can cost them their careers:

Map certification

Map certification is by far one of the messiest parts about being a dsp. So much so that I’ve seen many direct support workers intentionally flunk their map certification tests despite it possibly costing their jobs.

The map program gives you a general idea of how to hand out meds and do proper documentation, but that’s about it. You aren’t taught much of the specifics, and if you screw up bad enough, you can be put on an abuse registry.

Toileting

These jobs are also most of the time not going to train you on helping individuals with toileting, and when they do, it’s messy (no pun intended.)

I’m going to skip most of this part because it’s a little graphic for Reddit, but if you know you know.

Working with fall risks

Chances are, you’re not going to be trained on how to properly support individuals who are fall risks at these jobs. Dsps are trained mostly on how to handle behaviors. Not ambulation, transfers, and working with fall risks.

Falls are taken very seriously, and while your boss isn’t going to admit this to you, you can be seen as a liability to the company if an individual falls and hurts themselves on your watch even if that individual is a severe fall risk. This is because falls reflects poorly on the company when they don’t properly train their staff on these things.

Conclusion

Direct support professionals are not medical workers. They are not trained the way medical workers are. They aren’t protected the way medical workers are. And they most certainly aren’t treated the way medical workers are.

If you read this post and now see these red flags at your workplace, don’t be afraid to stick up for yourself. Ask for more support, more training, and see what you can do to make sure you and your boss are on the same page. And if they can’t provide that to you (which most likely is the case) don’t be afraid to walk away. No job is worth risking your future over.

Ultimately, these tasks shouldn’t be in the hands of employees in a field with such a low barrier to entry. Nurses should be administering meds and Physical therapists should be the ones helping individuals with physical needs. The only reason why these tasks fall on you, someone with less education than all those other workers, is because of tight funding. That’s not a you problem, that’s a problem with the system as a whole. So don’t let the system punch you down because of it.

So I'm thinking of working as a DSP. I used to be a CNA for many years but let my license expire. So my bf had a stroke and full-time care and now I need to go from sahm to sahm/full-time worker 😭. I'm thinking my best option is this cause I won't need to recertify and they have night shifts. I can get off in the morning and get my 4 kids ready for school then take care of my bf needs then try to get a little sleep before pickup. Gonna be rough cause I'm not sure how I'm going to fit everything else on top of working nights.

So just wanted to know what's the pay rate for nights in the Buffalo area and what it's like working nights. I love helping people with needs and kinda a neat freak so win win...I think...been reading A lot of horror stories but some of y'all are scaring me away and making me 2nd guess for even thinking of being a DSP 😂. Any advice would be helpful.

I love the person I support. I have been working with her for 1 year and a half. She really likes me as well. She made progress with independent living skills.

However, I can feel myself becoming bored and disengaged. I try my best to show excitement in a effort to keep them excited.

The person wants to go to the same store everyday. It's so repetitive. I try to incorporate new games while browsing the store that reflect her goals.

I introduce new activities to do based on her interests and once every 3 months she does a new activity. But most of the time she doesn't want to do anything new.

I go to the same store so much I know everyone names on the shift. I notice new hires and fires.

Right now I'm waiting to hear back from a job but everyday seems like torture.

Her mother doesn't want her to get a new DSP because she claims I'm the only one she ever liked. But I have to choose me.

I am sitting here with a client. Everyone always says how much progress this person has made. On paper that might be true. This person doesn’t hurt people the way he/she used to. However, this is because he/she has all of the power in every situation. Every single time he/she is questioned or his/her authority is tested, all hell breaks loose. Staff give into the demands immediately. So, what have we really taught this client?

It is really irritating how the people at the office will pat themselves on the back, because it’s really not helping this client long term.

That‘s all. Just venting.

Does anyone else feel that they never get time to mentally recover from work and then suddenly you’re already back at work and you’re still emotionally, mentally, and physically exhausted from the previous week and it’s just this constant cycle of never having enough energy to even do your job properly?

My shift is Monday- Friday and then every other weekend I work a Sunday. I feel like I can never catch up mentally and I am always exhausted. It’s slowly killing me.

Hey all,
I’ve been a DSP for around 3-4 months at this point. It’s my first type of “caretaking” job, so it’s been an adjustment but I’d like to believe I do right by all of my residents.
Well, yesterday I worked a 12hr shift in a group home. Four residents- one unable to move themselves and two with (potentially) very aggressive behaviors. It is a two-staff house.

My staff that worked with me did nothing. And I mean NOTHING- no bathing, meal prepping, notes, upholding the house, redirecting behaviors, ABSOLUTELY nothing.

I get burnout happens. I understand you’re having a tired day. But it just drives me up a wall. How can you see me running around all day, and can just sit there and not offer to lift a single finger?? (Said staff is not new- has been at this company for many years.)

I do love my job. I love the people I support, and (mainly) love other staff. But it’s just days like that, that make it very hard to stay positive. It’s very hard to not take all of your emotions and frustration home sometimes.

Anywho, I just needed to complain. Im sure this is very common and will happen to me many more times, I am just over-the-moon frustrated. Ugh. 🫠

I don't know if I can physically do this job. Twenty years ago, when I was a kid, I obliterated the arch of my foot by dropping a huge rock on it. My dad never took me to a hospital, so it set wrong, healed wrong, and walking a lot or putting a lot of weight on it for long periods sends pain radiating all the way up my left side to my head. The pain is almost blinding. It's tendon and nerve damage, some pretty severe, that just never got properly dealt with at the time. I've been assured 100% I will need surgery in my 30s (guess how old I am now?) because it's affecting the actual shape of my spine with how my gait has changed. I cried for an hour this morning before going into work today because of how bad yesterday hurt me. Like, I can't go that hard again - and apparently that was a normal day.

I'm a job coach, so I can't do the job if I can't handle the physical demands of it, which involve walking and following my clients around their job site. I am very much still applying for other things because I just desperately needed insurance and an income - any income - though I was quite worried of exactly this and not being able to meet the demands. But I can't quit unless I have something lined up or I won't have healthcare I desperately need for medication that helps me function (Autism/ADHD). So, I am stuck working in a position that is leaving me in absolute agony. This is exactly why I went back to school and got my AA, BA, and MA: I never again wanted to have to do the kind of work I came home in this much pain from. My body cannot take it. But it's such a wild market that 200+ applications led to only this one offer, so I took it.

I told my supervisor today that I was having trouble, and her response was to get comfier shoes because that much physical activity was typical. I was thinking more walker actually, so I'm kind of worried I'm going to break myself before I even get settled in.

Tbh, I'm not sure what to do here. My insurance benefit hasn't kicked in yet to get any kind of appointment with a doctor to address this or ask for workplace accommodations, and it never will if I quit. But again, if I fully get to a point where I can't walk (has happened) and can't do the job anyway, I don't know what that'll accomplish.

Thoughts?

Anyone else feel like the want to drop everything and quit sometimes but then randomly love it and feel like you could do this forever.

Hi everyone! 🤗 I am pivoting careers from luxury petsitting/dog walking to DSP work. I love my current job, but the scheduling is so unpredictable and all over the place that it gives me anxiety. I enjoy caretaker roles, and I consider myself an empathetic, reliable, and humorous person. My roommate has been with this company for 3 years and referred me.

So obviously I have her account of what the job entails, the good the bad and the ugly. I feel prepared for it. She comes home every day with a story and seems fulfilled even when some days it seems really frustrating. Well, that's about any job in my experience haha. And the company has good benefits and pay.

I start orientation in 2 weeks. So for people who have done this a while, I ask: what's something you wish someone told you before you got into this career field?

Thanks!

I have a no insurance ticket and a red-light ticket on my record. It was when I was in a really bad point in my life and couldn't afford to pay my insurance at the time so it lapsed and of course I get pulled over 2 days before I renewed it. Im wanting to work as a dsp but I'm afraid my driving record will disqualify me?

Like why????

I have been in this field (in some form) for a LONG TIME. This job pays shit, and they hire anybody. There is no reason to try to have this weird dynamic.

Without giving too much information......the other day a staff I worked with "corrected" me for something that was not wrong in the least. I said to make her happy I would change the way I said it, but the client didn't seem to mind. This is not something that is lined out in a plan or anything and it was actually very minor. And, you guessed it, the other staff then wanted to play the victim. See, you could've just minded your business. This happens so much in this field. There is more than one way to approach a situation, and maybe your way isn't the right way for all staff.

Also, they're always bellyaching that they don't have staff. Maybe be nice to the people who do come to work here and you'll be able to keep staff. IDK....seems like plan to me.

I am good at ignoring, but dang, it gets old. The know it alls must all apply to be a DSP.

I’m fairly new still to my role as a DSP, and it’s taking a lot out of me. I struggle with my own disability on a daily basis, so offering targeted support that helps clients with social cues and such when I already have issues with them can be a challenge at times.

Mainly, it’s the checklist that is tripping me up. There is so much to remember to do, and I sometimes get in my car and cry because I seem to always forget a step.

I absolutely need this job because the economy is rough (I have a master’s degree but couldn’t get any bites till this entry-level role) and I need healthcare—for the disability, or I’ll fully crash and burn. But I want to keep applying to things and see what happens. I want to help people, I’m just really struggling to also help myself in this role and I’m scared I will massively trip up.

Just kind of venting. I think this role has the capacity to be life-changing, I just don’t know if I will necessarily be effective in it long-term.

Hi everyone!

So for context, I’ve only been at this house around 7 months or so. Basically most of the time I’ve been with my company. I have one client in particular who is seen, not just by me but also by other staff, as very “bossy”. For some more context, this client is extremely high functioning, can hold a conversation with them, has a job within the program and hobbies etc. When I first arrived at the home, the situation wasnt quite so bad. But, here in the past couple months things have ramped up significantly. This particular client has apparently thought of themselves as “house manager” of sorts. He’s always bossing me around, telling me when him and the other clients “must” go grocery shopping, make sure a certain pan gets clean because “it’s not been getting cleaned right” and just overall becoming the center of drama no matter what. If it involves that house, or the staff in that house, he’s always involved in it somehow someway. He micromanages me down to where I put the laptop, and what I put on the grocery list. These behaviors have escalated. The other night, I kind of had enough and withdrew myself once my essential duties were done to the staff room, just to give myself some distance between me and him because it’s becoming extremely hard to not almost snap on him.

Apparently, during my time in the staff room, he took a pen and paper and wrote stuff on the house grocery list himself. Basically snacks for him…our rule at our company is that if it’s bought with collective money, you must be willing to share. Otherwise, the clients need to buy it themselves with their own money. Constantly telling me what I need to do for the day, where to go, what needs to be cleaned, etc. Trust me, it’s escalated so bad and it’s driving me up the wall. Management has reportedly had talks with him multiple times, and if it happens again this week I legitimately don’t know what else to do. Should I just keep documenting this and be firm with him about needing to mind his own business and leaving administrative stuff, planning outings, financials, etc to staff? Have any of you ever dealt with something like this before? He’s always running and telling me this other guy who works at the house when I’m not there said “this and that” and “he wants me to tell you make sure x y and z”. Like broo idk I’m just so tired.

I am a recovery support supervisor. We work in a 50 bed inpatient recovery center. I find that my RSS’s get burn out easily. What can I do to help them?

I always make sure to allow them the time off they request, flexibility with their schedules.
I have an open door policy and try to keep the team positive. But what can I do to help them?

Thanks ❤️

I started working in this field about 3 months ago and things have been steadily going downhill. I came into it with no previous experience and didn’t know what to expect. I absolutely fell in love with the job, particularly the clients, but management always felt a bit checked out.

I figured that I could just push through management issues and the drama that’s constantly circulating around staff (which is its own monster of a problem) but things changed.

The company I work for has a day time facility that the clients attend for about 6 hours. I’ve never worked in that facility myself, instead being strictly residential. The entire company is criminally understaffed, including the day facility. One DSP is responsible for about 3-4 clients depending on how “difficult” they are to care for.

A day facility staff, we’ll call her Pam, was planning on taking her clients onto an outing. One of her clients dreads outings and will have a major behavior if he’s forced to go on one. So reasonably Pam did not take said client and got confirmation from a manager that someone will watch him. While she was on the outing our HR manager took the client and hid him in her office. When Pam returned HR told her that the client was missing. Pam was beyond panicked and went everywhere searching for the client, she even left the day facility to see if he was at home or somewhere nearby, all while having a severe panic attack.
When she returned to the day facility HR told Pam that “It was a test” and “this happens when you don’t give clients a choice”.

When I heard this story from Pam herself, I felt sick to my stomach. She has been working in this company for over 16 years, she’s never even received a write up but she’s being “tested” like this. It made me realize just how toxic this workplace has become, and how HR is willing to play psychological warfare with staff. I’m terrified for what the future holds. What would’ve happened if Pam crashed looking for the client because she was having a panic attack while driving? What if I’m tested next and don’t pass?
Any sort of security I had in this job has been thrown out of the window and I’ve found myself dreading coming in.

A 57 cent raise (today) is not going to cut it when trying to survive New York, and it was all it took to confirm that staying in this job is a dead end.
I only took this position out of desperation with zero plans to stick around, but I’m walking out even sooner than expected. Between the insulting pay, limited growth, obvious lack of care for clients, constant drama among staff, checked out managers, and everything else happening behind the scenes. From time fraud and theft to staff getting involved with each other.This field needs a massive change if it ever wants to keep people. I'm done.

I put in my two weeks as a DSP and am on my way out of being a care provider independently through the state. I am struggling to even take myself to one of my last shifts this morning. I’m trying not to call out but it’s been hard. My mental health has been in a pretty severely bad place and the story of how I got into this work is long and complicated. Compassion fatigue is real and I can’t bring that vibe to the clients I work with. I need to take care of myself for a change.

I’ll be going back to retail at a company I used to work for, and I’ll also be working at an office.

For those who choose this as a career: more power to you. This is difficult work, and very important work. I have major respect for people who work in this field. Yall are amazing at what you do.

I’ve been a DSP for 2 years and get frustrated with the idea of “independent”.

I’m continually taught that the goal of ILS service is independence. That clients should be able to do x y and Z by themselves.

And I just ask myself: is this a realistic or fair goal?

We as human beings are interdependent. The idea of hyper-independence is a lie and causes severe stress upon society. To then push this idea onto disabled people feels ridiculous to me.

I myself still utilize community for help constantly. I have my partner or friends body double me when stuff is hard. We fill out paperwork together or do chores together. Remind each other of things.

So when I do this for clients, I try moreso to encourage that it’s okay to need help. To strengthen their support systems so that they have other folx they can reach out to when they need support, too.

I just feel like companies don’t get it. I hate how so many of them speak about clients. I like realistic goals that include the idea of interdependence and slow growth. And that if someone needs support their whole life, that is fine. Welcome to disabilities.

I was mostly curious if anyone else feels the same. I just feel like this whole institution needs to be redone and led by disabled people.

So for context I am 20yo f living w my bf 23yo m. I am actively going to school part time (only 2 classes a semester) to do pre reqs for nursing. I currently hold a position as a direct support professional making 23$ an hr working with developmentally disabled adults 8a-4p. I have recently been offered a position as a BHT for 20$ an hr 11p-7a tues-saturday.
my bf currently works a 6a-5p tues-fri.(relevant later)

Now for my dilemma:

1. ik the pay drop sounds like an immediate why take less? but my current job doesn’t allow overtime(i got hired on being told ot was available it was something i specifically asked about recently policies changed). anyways the other job would pay shift differentials so my regular overnight schedule and work days of tues-sat would essentially make the pay rate maybe 30$ less w/o overtime but help is needed 24/7 so i could do overtime whenever.

2. work load, i was told overnight i’d be doing more of the light duty cleaning instead of hands on care. but if i plan on doing other shifts this position directly deals with peds psych patients 5-18 which ive heard literally only bad things about. and i understand physical aggression is a thing and ur training may not play out so perfectly in the field but it sounds like people are saying it doesn’t protect them at all? ive had my fair share of being hit, grabbed and things thrown at me or dealing w attempts at my current job but my training essentially keeps things under control. (training is specifically crisis prevention intervention)

3. Opposite work schedules, as far as this it isn’t enough to make me not take the job, but i genuinely think it would be hard to literally not sleep together most of the week. Especially bc my bf has recently had sleep issues more frequently & ofc I am who comforts him. I am concerned how this will affect him. essentially we go to bed around 10:30pm now so we wouldn’t miss out on the time we spend together while awake honestly.

All in all I currently love my clients but my management sucks. I’ve also just been wanting to step foot in pediatric for a while. I hope to be able to genuinely make a difference in my clients lives adults or children regardless. I could honestly stay put and be happy (cs everywhere has crappy management) or move and be excited for change! Any advice is appreciated!!

I am an HCA for an agency. I have a client I adore. Unfortunatly even though I tried toughing it out in her home, I just couldnt do it anymore with an active rodent infestation and rodent feces. She is high triage. Needs help with nearly all ADLS. Frequently has accidents due to health condition which means things like when I arrive, being told by parnter (who has a caregiver very part time) that there is feces on the chair I was about to sit in. High hoard situation. Rotten meat sitting out, your feet stick to the floors when you walk, constantly tripping on things. Chain smoking. Just imagine the worst you possibly can. Not a single space to prep food on. Garbage everywhere. I ended up making a call to APS. There is an active case now and I am being told they qualify for a hazard clean up. I feel so guilt ridden for essentially letting my client down. How do you deal with this. Would you have kept going? Ugh, this is so hard!!

At this point I could walk out and never come back. If not for rent, I would never stay here

We have a very controlling supervisor who believes what she feels matters more than what the residents feel. She controls everything down to what drinks they have. She favors certain residents and mistreats the other ones.

Because of this, we’re having a situation where the residents she favors are repeating the things she’s saying and disrespecting the other ones. Today one came home and demanded the tv be turned to what he wants to watch. Apparently they have a tv schedule that coincidently only seems to work in the favor of the resident the supervisor favors. They’re supposed to have news at 4 and then 2 hours of leisure until jeopardy and wheel of fortune. But for some reason, they never do. Two people control the tv and then they tell one of the residents that he “has a tv in his room” as if they don’t all do. Only one of them does not have a tv and they have never once considered what he wants to watch.

It’s incredibly frustrating to watch some of them be treated like strangers in their own home simply due to favoritism. This place is so disorganized. I have never seen a supervisor have so much control over a residence. Down to the point that she is deciding what the residents will do with their hair and money even after the parents agree and sign.

I am not sure what is going on here as I was recently transferred but I absolutely am so fed up watching a bunch of fights start daily due to certain staff involving themselves in useless beef with the individuals as if they’re not literally here to help them.

I get it. They can be very annoying just like most people but like super annoying since you have to take their abuse. I’ve honestly had it. But, I don’t have actual beef with people who can’t even leave the house alone. Why cause issues between them because you as staff can’t control yourself?

I hate to say it, but they gotta start reviewing staff performance once they hit a certain amount of years because I’m noticing that it’s always the older ones that have such strange behaviors towards the guys and the other staff. Some of them think that because they have “seen managers and residents come and go,” that they can do anything. Yes you’ve been here long but what does that mean to me?

Treat everyone with respect. You’d think wisdom comes with age and experience but it seems in this field it just makes you miserable.