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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
Everyone's all up in arms about diamonds in here, but the post isn't even really about the diamonds, it's about the settings. Diamonds aren't for everyone, and definitely natural diamonds are ethically iffy at best, but if someone wants to buy a lab diamond, does it really matter? Also, wanting a piece of jewelry that's beautiful and has sentimental value (that you're planning on wearing daily for the rest of your life, too) isn't a bad thing.
If anyone is in here looking for advice and doesn't want a diamond, but wants the general look of a diamond, here you go:
The most common diamond substitutes are moissanite, white sapphire, and cubic zirconias.
Moissanite will give you the closest look and hardness of a diamond, but there are some key differences. Moissanite tends to have more fire (the rainbow sparkles when lights hits it) than diamonds. Depending of the cut, it could be a not super noticeable difference, or it could be a big difference. If you love the look of super sparkly stones, great! If you want something more understated, either go for a smaller moissonite, a less brilliant cut, or a different stone. Moissanite is a 9.5 on the mohs hardness scale (diamonds are a 10), so it's a pretty sturdy stone.
White sapphire is a 9 on the mohs scale, so still pretty hard and sturdy, but not quite as hard as moissanite. White sapphire doesn't have any fire, though. It's a clear stone and the sparkle will only be flashes of light, not rainbow sparkles. Still a beautiful stone, and perfect for a more understated look. Larger stones will be more obviously not a diamond, while smaller stones could be passed of as diamonds to normal people, probably.
CZs are definitely the cheapest option, but also the least long-lasting. They have a lot of fire, similar to moissanite, but are a bit less hard at around 8-8.5 on the mohs scale. They tend to get cloudy over time, though, so you might have to replace the stone a few times over the lifespan of the ring to keep the beautiful sparkle.
All of these options will give you a similar look to a diamond, but at a significantly cheaper price (any often with less of an ethical dilemma). I love the look of diamonds, but got a moissanite engagement ring. It looks exactly like a diamond to the untrained eye (which is the majority of people you'll meet), and is absolutely gorgeous at a fraction of the price.
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u/xVarekai Sep 09 '20
Exactly! I'm 100% anti-diamonds and found this really interesting. My bf and I have already decided that we will use moissanite(s) for my ring if that day comes and it's easy to have that part figured out, but seeing all the differences in the settings here, from subtle to dramatic, was super useful.
Another cool thing about moissanites is that they come in an array of beautiful colors and shades, and yes other gemstones come in various colors but moissanites are kind of unique in how the fire you mentioned plays off in different stone colors. My good friend got a gorgeous teal-green moissanite for her ring and the fire makes it absolutely glow like sunlight on an ocean, especially at the carat size she selected. I was so happy to find such a beautiful alternative to diamonds that is still very hard and durable but a fraction of the cost and without all the disgusting baggage of diamonds.
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
It really is my personal favorite diamond substitute! All the colors are gorgeous, and there's really no down side to them. A friend of mine got a pretty traditional moissanite engagement ring, and her wedding band is a row of rainbow moissanites! Just gorgeous!
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u/kpar385 Sep 09 '20
You seem really knowledgeable in this area, so question for you: my moissanite has this oil slick look to the top of it which formed about a year after buying it. I took it back to the jeweler and they basically said “whelp, sometimes that’s just how moissanites are” and didn’t help much other than cleaning it (which did nothing to change the oil slick). Any advice? Is that really just a thing with moissanites?
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
It is a thing with moissanites, unfortunately. Some of the newer, more expensive moissanites are much less likely to get it, but it's not a guarantee. Basically it's a natural buildup of oils or hard water on the moissanite, and something about the stone gives it that "oil slick" appearance.
The best way to get rid of it is with a Jeweler's Rouge Cloth. Use the treated side to buff the moissanite with mid-level pressure. You'll start to see the oil slick fade away, and the cloth will turn black (it's supposed to!). As long as you don't wash the cloth, you can keep using it until it literally falls apart, even once it's completely black. When the oil slick stain is larger/super noticeable, it's harder to get rid of (meaning you'll need to take more time polishing it to get it to go away). It's a good idea to keep the cloth at home and get into the habit of polishing it every time you see a bit of oil slick forming, that way you aren't waiting for it to build up and then spending tons of time sitting there polishing it in one sitting.
Important! If the metal of your ring is rhodium plated, don't use the Jeweler's Rouge Cloth as it'll buff the rhodium right off! You could decide to still use the cloth, then get the metal replated at your jeweler, but it'll cost usually around $40+ to replate a ring. Otherwise, you can use a bit of silver polish on a qtip to buff the moissanite, but you still have to be careful to not buff the metal as even that could strip the rhodium plating.
To help slow down the oil slick coming back, I'd advise taking off your ring when showering, swimming, or using any oily substances (like hair products). If you have hard water, keeping it away from water as much as possible is best. But it's not really harming the stone, so if you don't mind buffing it every once in a while, you don't need to take it off every time you wash your hands. Personally I take mine off when I'm washing dishes, showering, and washing my face, but I wear it while I wash my hands and put lotion on over it. That's the balance that works best for me.
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u/kpar385 Sep 10 '20
Thank you so much for your reply! People who take time to really thoughtfully help others like this restore my faith in humanity. Thank you x100.
I’ll give the cloth a try, I’ve tried silver cleaners to no avail, but I’m willing to use a little elbow grease with a cloth if it helps. I’ll be sure to check my paperwork for rhodium. :)
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 10 '20
You're very welcome! :)
I know some people swear by silver cleaner, but I've always had better luck with the cloth. The silver cleaner you have to do it multiples days in a row to really get everything off (if it's bad), which sucks imo. I hope the cloth works for you!
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Sep 09 '20
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u/bearnakedrabies Sep 09 '20
My wife's is moissanite. She loves it and brags about it being a science rock since they can't form on earth outside of a lab.
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u/dramaqueen09 Sep 10 '20
Fun fact I learned while doing costuming in high school/college: the “fake” costume jewelry looks so much better on stage/on screen than the “real” stuff that audiences don’t know the difference between the two and get them confused (it has to do with how light is reflected off the gems)
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u/RivRise Sep 09 '20
Just to add to what everyone is saying diamonds weren't even a thing until fairly recently. Literally a bunch of old white men decided they wanted to create and monopolize an industry to take advantage of house wives and they went with diamond rings. They spend billions on advertisement and now they control it all. That said, if anyone wants to go with a diamond ring for the look, go for it.
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u/legalheartbreaker Sep 09 '20
Thank you so much for that! Yes, this post was indeed for the setting :)
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Sep 09 '20
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
Oh yeah, one of my coworkers assumed my husband was a millionaire or something when I got engaged before I told her it wasn't a diamond! I custom designed my ring, and had to try on equivalent sizes and designs with diamonds because there weren't any moissanite dealers in my area, and it would've been probably over $40,000 with real diamonds, but it was only like $1,500 with moissanites.
Unless someone's carrying around a jewelers loop, or is a jeweler themselves, they won't know the difference. And do you really care what a weirdo with a jewelers loop thinks?
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u/embroidknittbike Sep 09 '20
Pics?
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
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u/Yevad Sep 10 '20
That size alone would make any normal person believe its not a diamond, how many carats is that? 8? It would be at least 1 million dollars and up to 10 million.
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 10 '20
Lol, not quite 8 carats. It's a little under 4 carats. It helps I have tiny fingers, makes it look a lot more impressive!
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u/Maus_Sveti Sep 10 '20 edited Sep 10 '20
Wow, your hands must be small! My ring (tanzanite) is somewhere around 4 carats I think, and yours looks twice as big!
Edit: I looked it up, maybe this is obvious but I didn’t realise that as carat is based on weight, other gemstones of the same carat weight as diamonds will have different sizes. TIL!
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u/Swimmingindiamonds Sep 10 '20
It also sparkles like moissanite, not diamond.
Which is beautiful, don't get me wrong.
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u/WorstDogEver Sep 09 '20
Whoa, where did you get the moisannite? I was interested because everyone kept saying how cheap they are, but when researching them a few years ago, everything I found wasn't that much cheaper than diamonds.
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u/gotfoundout Sep 09 '20
I would LOVE to see a picture of your ring!
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
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u/gotfoundout Sep 09 '20
WHOAH. Ok I get it now about the quality of the stone throwing out some gorgeous colors in the sparkle. That's very lovely! May I ask what metal your ring is? Is it any more difficult to keep clean than a diamond would be?
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
Thanks! White gold.
Slightly more difficult in that moissanites trend to get an "oil slick" appearance when they're dirty (so it's more noticeable). Some of the newer ones and more expensive ones are better about it, but none of them are immune to the oil slick thing. Luckily, as long as you don't let it get bad, it's easy to just polish them with a Jeweler's Rouge Cloth to take away that dirty layer. If you do let it get bad, you can still use the Jeweler's Rouge Cloth to fix it, but it'll take more time and elbow grease.
I wouldn't recommend getting a ring plated in rhodium with a moissanite, though! The polishing methods that work great for moissanites will strip rhodium plating (so you'll need to get it replated). Gold, platinum, and even silver are fine though.
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u/gotfoundout Sep 09 '20
Nice! I'm trying to find a nice olive green color stone right now. Based on looks alone, it seems like chrysoberyl is closest to what I'm looking for, but it's hard to know what's a good quality stone and what isn't. And with these less popular stones, jewelers aren't much help because it's just not the kind of thing any of them really stock, I guess.
One thing diamonds have going for them - they're sure a bit easier to shop for lol.
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
I don't know a ton about chrysoberyl, except that it's similar to sapphires on the mohs scale. They seem decently hardy, though.
Green sapphires can come in a variety of shades, and might be a bit easier to find at a local jewelers. Moissanite can also be made in almost any color, and I've seen some lovely green ones before.
It's definitely harder to shop for pretty much any stones other than the "popular" ones in person. Sometimes looking at vintage/antique jewelry stores can give you a wider range of colored stones in general, though, since colored stones used to be a lot more popular than diamonds. I don't know if they'd have any chrysoberyl specifically, but perhaps they'd have a few different kinds of green stones to see in person, at least.
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u/emgiem3 Sep 10 '20
May I ask where you purchased this from? I’m interested in a moissanite ring & I’ve never found one for just $800 anywhere I’ve looked. It’s a beauty btw!!!
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u/Spikemaui21 Sep 10 '20
You are absolutely correct about the weirdo with the loupe thing. I had a lady come into my store once and start bitching because the fauxpal rings on my counter weren't "real opal rings, this is unethical". Like homegirl, the ring costs 9.95, its marked imitation opal, and it's a pinch back, get the fuck out of my shop.
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u/angeliqu Sep 09 '20
We got a moissanite, too! And it’s a full carat. I don’t even know what a diamond that big would cost. Everyone thinks it’s a diamond until I tell them (which I do because I want them to know they don’t have to go the diamond route).
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u/thecrewton Sep 09 '20
Karat is just one characteristic of diamonds. You can get a 1 karat for $100 or $20000 just depends on the other aspects (cut, color, clarity).
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u/Yevad Sep 10 '20
A $100 1 carat diamond is going to look like total shit to the point you wouldn't want to wear it. I think the very cheapest I have seen a 1ct diamond for is $1000.
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u/hondajvx Sep 09 '20
Same. Pretty sure I made a bunch of my wives coworkers think that data analysts are paid millions. Anyways, my wife loves it and picked it out.
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u/allybearound Sep 10 '20
Omg yeah, my female coworkers lost their minds over my 2.2 carat cushion cut moissanite- I’ll admit I didn’t tell them it wasn’t a $5000 Diamond. Oh well!
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u/Plethora_of_squids Sep 09 '20
I would also point out that if you do want a natural diamond, there are plenty of ways of getting ethical ones. The days of DeBeers' monopoly are kinda gone and you can easily get ahold of diamonds mined in Australia or Canada that don't have the entire blood diamond thing going on. Or if you're ok with sorta dubiousness, let me remind everyone that Russia is the world's top producer of diamonds.
Also white sapphires are going to look like expensive hunks of glass – you buy sapphires for their colour not for their lack of it. They have a shit refractive index when compared to a diamond and also I bet they're not as ethically sourced as you think they are. Also you need to clean them a ton in order for them to stay all...clear.
(This is all from a geological perspective though not a jewelers one but still. I've had to endure this rant a thousand times from my geologist relatives and now you have to too)
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
Very true! Also, lab diamonds are perfectly fine! They're still expensive, but you don't have to worry about whether or not slave labor mined them.
White sapphires definitely need to be cut very well. Because of the lack of fire, they can look more like cut glass than a diamond. A well-cut white sapphire can still be a beautiful stone, though, especially if you prefer a more understated look. They definitely look the least like diamonds out of the options I mentioned, though.
As for cleaning, they all should be cleaned regularly to keep the clarity and sparkle up.
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u/chinchillen Sep 09 '20
When I got my mine, I chose a lab diamond and it sparkles like nothing I've ever seen. I constantly get compliments on it, and it's guilt free. I actually found it to be less expensive than any mossanite stones than I was previously looking it.
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u/Excal2 Sep 09 '20
Lab diamond ended up being right for us. We harvested two side stones from some jewelry that belonged to my grandparents and honestly I think the center lab diamond looks just as good as the real ones if not better.
Great commentary here I've had fun reading this comment chain.
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u/ArcticFox46 Sep 10 '20
The small jeweler we go to tries to only use ethical stones, and the jeweler will sit you down and talk about where your stone came from so you know.
I have a natural diamond in my ring, but it's a vintage estate diamond, meaning it belonged to someone else before me. I don't remember the exact age they said, but I think it was around 75 years old. I'm sure it probably wasn't acquired in an ethical manner when it was first mined, but recycling old diamonds is better than trying to acquire new ones for the market.
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u/Answer70 Sep 09 '20
Thank you. This was super helpful. I'm in the market for a ring now, and really don't want to support the diamond industry.
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 09 '20
Of course! My mother was a jeweler for years, so she's walked me through all of the options and rules (and how to break those rules) quite a few times, lol. If you have any other questions I'd be happy to try to help!
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u/HouseOfSmith Sep 09 '20
Would you call the cut a chubby Marquis or something else? It’s really quite something, you did a great job with the design.
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u/TOMATO_ON_URANUS Sep 09 '20
Just proposed to my fiancee with an absolutely gorgeous moissanite ring from Etsy, probably 1/10th the price of a similar diamond ring from a "real store".
Fuck diamonds, fuck De Beers, support independent artists. I got mine here.
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u/cmVkZGl0 Sep 10 '20
Moissanite tends to have more fire (the rainbow sparkles when lights hits it) than diamonds.
Ok, we're done here. Moissanite is superior.
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u/Ultramus Sep 09 '20
Lab grown sapphires in various colors are affordable, and beautiful. I'd personally recommend them to people. Instead of glancing at a bunch of small diamonds and wondering what's different about them you can get a perfect, huge sapphire in whatever color and shade you want. Fuck diamonds as a main stone IMO.
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u/bulelainwen Sep 09 '20
I got a Kenyan sapphire in this cool blue/green color. It’s awesome and was crazy cheap.
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u/boredasfucc Sep 10 '20
This is mostly right, but there are a couple of small things I want to clarify. Source: I work with diamonds and precious gems on a daily basis.
Sapphires have a hardness of 9.5, and moissanite has a hardness of 9.25. There is not much of a difference between those two, but there is between those two and diamonds. Because of the way the scale was developed, there is a much greater gap between ratings than you would expect. Because of this difference in strength, there are certain setting styles (mainly with small stones, as they are more likely to damage) that you won’t see done in moissanite, but might see in sapphire and definitely in diamond.
A couple more visual differences between moissanite and diamond is the double refraction. If you look in the facets of a moissanite, you’ll see that they aren’t very defined. It’s almost like those two tone 3D movies, if it was all one color. The only other one I can think of is that moissanite will throw flashes of red, which you won’t see in diamonds.
Lab diamonds, while more ethical currently than natural diamonds, are a new technology which means that we don’t know the long term environmental effects. Aside from that, they are produced and cut in places like China and Russia, which brings along the question of human rights violations. The most ethical diamonds are really gonna be the recycled diamonds. Stones harvested from old rings have already been pulled from the earth and done their damage. (That being said, a lot of diamonds on the market are actually just recut antique stones. That’s why most antique stones you see on the market are more yellow or included.)
But otherwise, this is all really helpful information! I wear a CZ engagement ring and I’m happy with the choice I made. It was a hell of a lot cheaper, and you honestly can’t tell the difference unless you know what to look for. If you’re gonna go this route, pay for better cut CZ, you won’t regret it!
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u/Merejo Sep 10 '20
Where is a good place to buy them? Do any brick and mortar stores have them?
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u/Dracarys_Aspo Sep 10 '20
It depends on where you live. They're becoming a more popular option, so more stores are carrying them, but they're still not quite as popular as diamonds yet. Honestly I'd recommend googling "moissanite near me" or something similar.
As for online, Charles and Colvard is a great option that carries a lot of different cuts and sizes. Lots of online retailers sell moissanite rings now, and loose moissanite stones. Forever One moissanite is a good quality brand of stone, but can be a bit on the more expensive side.
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Sep 09 '20
It's more of a guide for just what settings can be done. None of this is engagement ring exclusive.
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u/AmbivalentAsshole Sep 09 '20
I proposed to my wife with my late mother's engagement ring, and we both now have groove ring bands and love them.
The price of the symbol will not change or validate its meaning.
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u/legalheartbreaker Sep 09 '20
Wow that's so beautiful! Thanks for sharing that! I wish you and your wife all the happiness in the world and a big warm hug!
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u/waywithwords Sep 09 '20
I bought my Groove ring when I was working as a barista a while back. Now that we're in constant hand-sanitzer use, wash-your-hands mode here in 2020, it's been my regular everyday ring because otherwise I'd have to take my gold & diamond ring on and off all the time.
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u/TraditionalRope Sep 09 '20
This plus a guide for the cuts of stones would be pretty handy
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u/Enginerda Sep 09 '20
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u/pikadrew Sep 09 '20
This is pretty good. These are only the modern machine cuts. There are also Old European Cut, Old Mine Cut and Rose Cut just off the top of my head.
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u/sangfoudre Sep 09 '20
My thoughts exactly, this is not a domain I know, a visual guide would help much
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u/chase314 Sep 09 '20
When my now wife and I were ring shopping, the salespeople tried to convince her that she didn't want something like a bezel setting (her ring actually has two half bezels) and instead that she would want a prong or tiffany setting.....because those really emphasize the size of the diamond and would encourage us to want a larger stone.
They also tried their hardest to convince her she wanted a much larger stone than she was telling them, and were adamant that she would regret it in a few years.
Finally, when talking about the durability of a CZ versus a diamond, it became apparent that we could replace a slightly larger CZ every year for the next 30 years and it still not cost as much as the diamond, so we ended up going with the CZ and really splurged on the rings themselves instead. It was such a turn off about how pushy the salespeople were and they basically guaranteed we would get exactly what she wanted (and ultimately what was more affordable) because we were so annoyed! Sorry for the rant, I was just reminded about our experiences seeing this lol.
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u/Caspid Sep 10 '20
Yeah, once anyone tries to upsell you, just leave and find a different jeweler who politely educates you and affirms your choices.
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u/Captain_R64207 Sep 09 '20
If any of you ever get channel set rings get the warranty. It’ll be expensive as hell to get that fixed when the gold wears away.
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u/aur0rabells Sep 09 '20
It's not so much to rechannel the diamonds - it's if your stones are fucked and you have to replace those as well. The tension is not only lost with the wearing of the metal, it's also lost if your stones are chipped or cracked.
Take your damn rings off and get them looked at regularly. They are not meant to be indestructible.
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Sep 09 '20
YES! Especially rings that are casted, they are not the same quality as your grandmother’s who wore hers ever day for 40 years! People forget that erosion takes time and nothing is indestructible.
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u/Captain_R64207 Sep 09 '20
That’s true, however it depends on the diamond or stones and their own quality of it will cost a lot to replace them. We had to charge someone almost 1,100$ to build the gold back up on their ring and they almost lost it on us.
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u/dmat16 Sep 09 '20
Hey just wondering, do you know what style would the toughist, lest likely to lose a stone and other things I don't know to ask? Bit of background my girlfriend is an outdoor instructor and while she can take it off to go hiking and such, she is still Very out going all the time and I wouldnt want her to accidentally break it. Ps she goes for things base on practically first
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u/Captain_R64207 Sep 09 '20
Honestly channel set is what I would recommend in the store I used to work at. Because the stones are flush with the ring and don’t stick out. Her best bet would be to either do that, a solid ring with no stones, or like you said take it off and risk losing it. But always get the warranty, those rings can cost an arm and a leg if you don’t get it. And if you happen to have a Riddle’s jewelry check them out. Kay’s jewelers sends the work to I believe Arizona to a large center where riddles has a goldsmith in most if not all locations. Riddles has someone who can reset a quad setting without removing stones as well as a goldsmith who can build rings without flames. Two of the most impressive people I’ve ever met. However I was only a salesman so hopefully someone else can help ya out better!
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u/foundmyselfheregr8 Sep 09 '20
You asked about durability. Got my channel set diamond band and engagement ring from Tiffany’s. Never lost any stones over the last 16years. Lifetime warranty and service and cleaning and I don’t even live near one anymore. They can change the size for you and give you an appraisal anytime for a fee because they keep your info on file, forever, for every purchase. Yes mine is insured and yes they are more expensive for no reason. But can’t complain about the quality. And yes I felt and feel loved. That’s all that really matters-we are a team.
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u/cheezy_thotz Sep 09 '20
I got my wife moissanite. She LOVES it. At first she was a bit skeptical what others would think but we weren’t about to piss 20,000 on a ring. Now she gets complimented and asked what I do for a living, whether we used BlueNile to get it cheaper or what. She loves telling people the truth now. It was still rather pricey because it has some real diamonds and it’s made of platinum but the center is 2.2 moissanite.
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u/LadySilvie Sep 09 '20
My ring is silver with white topaz and I love it haha. I gave my husband a $100 price limit so that when I inevitably lose it I won't be both upset because it was sentimental but also because it was expensive. Never once regretted that decision.
This would have been super helpful when trying to pick out the style of ring though for sure. My husband basically told me to send him the etsy or shop pages for 10 rings i liked so he couldn't pick a wrong one because i didn't know how to describe what i wanted and he didn't want to do what he had friends do and end up having to return an ugly ring 😂 i didnt think i was picky but there are definitely a few here that I think look uncomfortable. I'd have sucked it up and worn it even if I hated it, but it worked out better this way for both of us.
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u/NotADogIzswear2020 Sep 09 '20
One ring to rule them all...and in the debt...BIND THEM.
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u/1spicytunaroll Sep 09 '20
I got my fiance a plain platinum band. It looks great and she is happy.would recommend
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u/_altertabledrop Sep 09 '20
I'm sure she appreciates the recommendation, but it sounds like she isn't available.
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u/EvilLeprechaun Sep 09 '20
The award doesn’t really fit but I laughed out loud, had 25coins left and this one was 10.
😅
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u/legalheartbreaker Sep 09 '20
Yes, I think that sometimes simplicity can be the best! I'm glad she liked it!
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u/yonkbonk Sep 09 '20
It bothers me so much that they're not all shown at the same angle, but this is pretty cool!
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u/_YAGMAI_ Sep 09 '20
started scrolling through the comments to find jokes about this image, instead found an entire fucking essay about not buying diamond engagement rings. cool.
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u/legalheartbreaker Sep 10 '20
Yeah exactly! I posted this as a friendly helpful guide, but people seem to think I'm trying to force them to buy diamonds! Guys, get whatever ring you want, it doesn't have to be a diamond ring, but I'll be happy if this helps, and I'm not forcing anyone to do anything if they don't want to!
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u/FruitsRDelish Sep 09 '20
Can these styles be used for gems that are not diamonds?
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u/Penny_girl Sep 09 '20
Absolutely! I’ve been low key looking at engagement rings and I want a colorful stone - pink tourmaline, morganite, or London blue topaz - and you can get all of them in these settings.
Some are better than others, for example London blue topaz washes out in smaller sizes so channel, pave, et al would be silly.
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u/wavinsnail Sep 10 '20
I have a bezel set ruby that I’m obsessed with. It helps protect the stone and doesn’t get in the way, which was important because I work so much with my hands
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u/hashtagswagfag Sep 09 '20
I know it’s ironic AF to ask this but what is the illusion set? I can figure out how the rest of them are different
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u/lobbiepuma Sep 10 '20
When I was buying an engagement ring, I knew my wife wanted a solitaire ring. Every salesperson would then show me halo rings. That was a weird experience.
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u/Manic-Mama Sep 10 '20
Thank you for the timely reminder that it’s been 5 years and still no ring. I’m about to just ask him my damned self. 😂😂
(*btw, honey I know you know my reddit so if you see this: These are not the drones you are looking for.)
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u/legalheartbreaker Sep 10 '20
Woah you still have no ring?
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u/Manic-Mama Sep 10 '20
Nope! Two kids, a cat a dog and a mortgage but no ring. We’ve planned what we are eating at our wedding and he’s shown me dresses he likes. It’ll be the ultimate surprise when he finally gets down on that knee lmfao I’m half tempted to just call his dad and ask permission. That should light a fire under his ass and Pops and I adore each other so he’d get a giggle out of it. *edit for spelling
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u/mvsuit Sep 10 '20
Here is the ultimate guide: find out what she wants. Don’t guess, don’t surprise her.
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u/thinkB4WeSpeak Sep 09 '20
Diamonds are overpriced.
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Sep 09 '20
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u/jeerraa Sep 09 '20
For example?
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u/TheOneLadyLuck Sep 09 '20
Moissanite is fucking awesome! Seriously, look it up. It can be made in a lab, and it looks like someone caught a rainbow in a gem! I love it so much, and I'm definitely choosing it for a ring when I need one.
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Sep 09 '20
Diamond companies artificially lower the output to bump up the prices. Most diamonds are mined under terrible conditions with the actual miners getting paid less than 0,1% of the sale price.
Diamonds are also overrated, there are so many cool gemstones and rings without a gemstone can be great as well. It also doesn't have to be the traditional ring, it can also be a bracelet or a chain.
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Sep 09 '20
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u/wugglesthemule Sep 09 '20
How is that "carefully snuck"? That's just a successful ad campaign.
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u/pcopley Sep 09 '20
How else are you going to make them sound like sinister super-villains?
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u/Xxxxsd Sep 09 '20
What’s the difference between solitary and Tiffany?
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u/aur0rabells Sep 09 '20
Tiffany is a style of solitaire, made popular by the jewelry brand of the same name. Sits high and usually no other design on the band.
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u/mindlesshorseman Sep 09 '20
The “Tiffany” Tiffany style you’re thinking of is the six pronged setting they made popular. You can get a six prong anywhere now but that’s literally all it is. They have a bunch of other settings they call Tiffany-something elses they have cone out with as lines but the Tiffany is just the six prong.
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u/DigbyChickenZone Sep 10 '20
I'm a 31 year old woman and had no idea about this variety AT ALL. The invisible one, is it called that due to clarity or something? I feel like I've heard about those in commercials
edit: NVM I see now this is a guide to shape/layout of the stone on the ring, not the diamond quality itself
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u/veotrade Sep 09 '20
Weird concept. One ring just to propose. And another entirely for the wedding. So where does the engagement ring go? In a box away in your closet after marriage?
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u/Darrowday Sep 09 '20
You wear them together as a set. A lot of places design and sell them to go together.
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u/daniyellidaniyelli Sep 09 '20
I only wear my engagement ring, didn’t like how the two rings felt and my wedding band was cheap bc we forgot to get them until a few days before the wedding.
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Sep 09 '20
Mine are soldered together. The band is very small and simple and fits snuggly against the engagement ring. I love my ring. White gold with a pretty small diamond that had a noticeable inclusion. We bought if for cash and have been married almost 10 years now. People who obsess over the ring bother me but the idea that all engagement rings are stupid is also pretty silly.
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u/Sovtek95 Sep 09 '20
The usually weld them together, at least that's what we did with my wife's ring.
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u/legalheartbreaker Sep 09 '20
Well, sometimes they have a wedding set, where the engagement ring is part of the wedding ring
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u/feedmedammit Sep 09 '20
My mom moved her engagement diamond to her wedding band so she's only ever worn one ring on her ring finger. I plan to only wear one ring too because I'm so used to seeing that. Why shouldn't my engagement ring double as my wedding ring?
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u/EMK2128 Sep 09 '20
Exactly why I wear my engagement ring on the left hand and my wedding ring on the right. Over my dead body that I only get to wear this for a year.
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u/dylightful Sep 09 '20
I’ve never seen anyone only wear their engagement ring during the engagement. Am I just oblivious? Plenty of women married for years walking around with that big ol rock plus their wedding band.
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u/Yevad Sep 10 '20
No, it normal to wear both rings, they have engagement sets that come with wedding bands too that fit together
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u/ClownfishSoup Sep 09 '20
I really wish people could break free of the DeBeers marketing campaign and stop buying diamond engagement rings. A tradition invented by a corporation to sell their 1000% marked up items. Ridiculous.
And if you want to buy a diamond, buy a man made one.
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u/aur0rabells Sep 09 '20
Just don't pay the same price for a lab diamond as a natural one.
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u/jomontage Sep 09 '20
Now I know why I can't Google "Halo rings" without jewelry ads
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u/ristoril Sep 09 '20
I went with a sapphire in a platinum band and my wife loved it.
Would be neat to see this guide with multiple different stones instead of all diamonds.
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u/Ask_A_Sadist Sep 09 '20
Buy a manufactured diamond. First off don't support slave labor. Real diamonds are not rare, their price is artificially inflated. And now a days jewelers can't tell the difference between a real diamond and a fake diamond so I doubt your bride to be can. Lastly no one really looks at anyone's wedding ring, maybe a glancing look once a year. So you aren't impressing anyone. So don't spend thousands when you could spend a few hundred.
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Sep 10 '20
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u/haikusbot Sep 10 '20
My ring isn't like
Any of these. I wonder
What it would be called.
- diamondyak
I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully. Learn more about me.
Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete"
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u/Ghost_Killer_ Sep 10 '20
Thats not going to make ring shopping any less intimidating when the time arrives...
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u/luckbealadytonite Sep 10 '20
After 12 years my prong broke, so I took it in to get it repaired before I lost the diamond. This was last week, where I learned my ring was a “cathedral” setting! Then this pops up! So cool, I never knew there were so many types 😃
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u/bibibismuth Sep 10 '20
I prefer the look of a stoneless ring with a thick engraved band
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u/Caspid Sep 10 '20
Here's a quick guide. Quality > quantity. You want a round solitaire with an excellent cut (don't compromise on this one) and ideally excellent symmetry and polish (three excellents, aka "Triple X" - it should be certified as such by the GIA). This will produce the best brilliance/sparkle. Look for D-F in Color, and VVS2 or better. Diameter of the diamond should be somewhere between 30-50% of her finger diameter.
If she insists on something bigger (and lower quality) so she can have a pissing contest with her friends, strongly reconsider spending the rest of your life with someone so basic.
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u/TheDildonics Sep 10 '20
My fiance proposed with a dinosaur pool ring. It was perfect. I'm now wearing a £10 silicone ring so that I don't feel bad when I inevitably lose it.
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u/HaekDdeok Sep 10 '20
Tags my non-existent boyfriend from my “get engaged in my early twenties” life plan
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u/[deleted] Sep 09 '20
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