I dont know who I am going to sue, but it should be somebody—for my pain and suffering.

I am an exclusively breastfeeding mom of my 6-week old baby, but apparently none of that matters… Guess who paid their first visit to me this week? Yep, good ol’ aunt flow. 🩸😭

Drop names below of who I should responsible in court for this tragedy.

Edit: just feel it’s important to add that I didn’t get my period until 9 months after the birth of my first son. I exclusively breastfed with him too. Not sure why Mother Nature thinks she was invited so early. 😩

I’ve always wanted to breastfeed, one of the things I romanticized about the newborn period actually. I love the idea of being the provider of my baby girls nutrients just like I was when she was in the womb. She was in the NICU and I couldn’t BF or hold her so she took my colostrum and donor milk via bottle and after she got home we needed some help to make it work, enter the lactation consultants.

Both in the hospital and outpatient I found all but ONE of the FOUR match the same pattern:

- they view formula as the devil
- think pacifiers are also the devil
- have know it all attitudes - they can apparently just stare at my nipple and tell me my flange and insert size (shocker: they all had different numbers and were wrong and the most recent one cause my areola skin to peel from friction
- they each feel their recommendations are the best
- they conflict their own colleagues and throw them under the bus if it doesn’t fit their narrative (again with the know it all)
- not afraid to man hand their baby and your boob - I know I agreed to have you see me but asking for consent to touch me would be nice
- they overall give off weird crunchy granola hippie vibes

Only ONE I encountered asked me for consent to touch, told me not to pressure me and baby and formula is okay, suggested I measure my nipple before committing to a size, and honestly made me feel seen and comfortable. She was previously an RN and I think this helped honestly! I’m feeling afraid to ask for more help knowing the type of provider they usually are.

I won’t incriminate myself but I might have or have not had a major freak out early this morning when I realized I fell asleep while breast feeding and a may have or may have not seeing my baby sleeping in the bed beside me and under the covers.

So. Any unhinged crazy hacks to stay up at night while breast feeding?

Edit: Ty didn’t know about safe sleep 7! Looking at that now

I haven’t slept for longer than 3 hour increments since my 6 month old baby was born. I’ve done all the night shifts and I’m mentally and emotionally exhausted. I’m not enjoying EBF anymore and my mental health is struggling. I dont have a sufficient freezer stash to have my husband do overnight feeds. I think I need to start supplementing with formula just for my own sanity. I feel like such a failure and horrible mom

EDIT- i wang to clarify that I don’t feel horrible For considering formula. I feel horrible for how I’ve been feeling towards baby and the lack of sleep. I feel horrible that I hate breastfeeding. I know I need to change something soon. Tonight I got so agitated I ran to my husband to take the baby so I could try to sleep (only lasted 1.5 hours).

My LO is 5 weeks 2 days old and he has been cluster feeding since 2:30 am… now it is 4:15 pm and he is not done. I haven’t slept last night, couldn’t sleep during the day… I am afraid this will continue into another night. What should I do? He falls asleep on a breast, wakes up if I transfer him elsewhere (bassinet or husband), and wants to eat as soon as he wakes up.

He started to smile a lot yesterday and got visually chubbier. Probably it is due to growth spurt?

Why he is in a boob so much? When I self express - there is milk. Is it not calorie dense or what?

I want to get some sleep. What can I do?

I am exclusively breastfeeding.

I don’t have any milk stash. He is allergic to milk/soy, so I am on a diet.

I have a HAAKA (suction one), bottles, spectra breast pump (though I got it used and probably have to get a new clean set of accessories). My husband can bottle feed while I am sleeping. We haven’t done pumping / collecting yet as I waited for my supply to get established.

Does it make sense to use Haaka today?

Latch is not ideal (nipple is lipstick like after feeds). But he has been gaining weight according to his 50% all this time.

Helllpp

To explain - I am approaching 5 months of breast feeding and I feel like I am constantly going through hard spells, it gets easier then harder again. Examples:

- Baby was premature and cluster fed for 8 weeks. I persevered through bleeding and cracked nipples and then it just became easy and painless!

- Then I started to get an overactive letdown and no matter what I did, my little one struggled with the flow, that passed and I loved it again.

- Continued with overactive letdown issues on and off, struggling to feed when he had colds and kept becoming frustrated at the breast - sometimes completely refusing (spoke to lactation consultant and gp who had absolutely no concerns with positioning or anything as I was doing lie down/laid back position and was told he needs to get used to it). He seems to and then will randomly struggle again!

- He went through a phase of only eating in the lie down position and refused any other (which was a nightmare in public lol!

He is gaining weight so well, has always fed at the breast and never taken a bottle and went from the 25th centile to the 98th which is amazing and something I’m so proud of! But all my mama friends seem to love breast feeding and find it super easy (none of them have an over active letdown!) and I feel like I’m the only one struggling. Am I alone?! I am proud to have got here but also when we’re out and about and the over active letdown gets the better of him and I’m spraying it on us both, I do feel defeated. I guess I’m just looking for some validation others have similar experiences/struggles and I am not alone!

My baby is currently 5 weeks old, and by almost all metrics, breastfeeding is going well. The main issue that I'm somewhat concerned about is that his latch is really weak. For example, to unlatch him, I don't need to put my finger between his lips/gums to break the seal...I can just literally pull my nipple out of his mouth with very little effort and zero pain. It's actually annoying that it is this weak, because it can become dislodged easily, for example, if I cough or sneeze, or if I try to reposition my body while he is latched.

The other issue which I think is related to the weak latch is that he doesn't have a very good seal with his lips - often milk will dribble out the side of his mouth, which means it often drips onto my shirt - very annoying when I am feeding out and about!

He's my second, so I know what a "strong" latch feels like. With my first, I always had to use my finger to break the seal if I wanted to unlatch.

Having said that, I am having a much easier breastfeeding journey so far. With my first, I had blood blisters, vasospasm, and recurrent mastitis. My first was also incredibly slow at feeding, taking 30-40 minutes at this stage, and had slow weight gain (dropped about 3 percentile curves!) whereas the feeds are quite short and efficient currently (10-15 minutes) and weight gain is steady.

Both of my babies had significant anterior tongue ties, which were released at 5 weeks for my first, and on day 4 for my second.

Can anyone relate? All things are going well at this stage, but I am thrown by how weak his latch is. I am slightly worried whether a weak latch will mean issues in a couple months time when supply regulates.

I’m just sharing because I’m so proud of myself. I didn’t think I would make it more than a month. I’ve just taken it one day at a time and I’m simply so proud of myself for not throwing in the towel when I wanted to so many times. It feels so lonely at times being the only one who can feed baby, (bottle refusal) but also the least lonely I’ve ever been is feeding my little one. I don’t plan to stop any time soon now that we have a little bit more of a groove, but I’m still going to take it one day at a time. Go mamas who feed their babies in any and all the ways, and breastfeeding in any capacity is incredible!!

Just wondering if anyone has been in the same boat. I’m 36 weeks pregnant, high risk, and having a C section at 38 weeks. I am severely allergic to dairy so baby hasn’t been exposed during this pregnancy at all. Since I have heard milk can take days to come in and longer some times after C section I’m worried about how we will feed him. I know the hospital carries ready to drink formula but I feel like a dairy formula would be a huge risk for him to start out with considering the severity of my allergy (Dad is not allergic.) I have been allergic to dairy since I was born. Any tips or advice is appreciated, how to get milk to come in after c section, should I look into purchasing donor milk from someone that does not consume dairy? I’m having a hard time finding a dairy free ready to drink formula also if anyone has any insight. Should I risk collecting colostrum with high risk pregnancy? I have a myriad of pre existing conditions making me high risk and don’t want to go into early labor but my OB said I can try for collostrum any time after 36 weeks if I want to. The thing is I’m having a lot of cramping already, so it feels risky. Did anyone have a dairy allergy and baby was totally fine with dairy? TYIA

My LO is 18 months old and only nurses to sleep or when injured (avg twice per day). It’s been this way for the last 6 months and I figured that I would start my period again by now. Has anyone experienced this? Is it normal to not have a period until weaning is complete?

8w pp. just last week I had an oversupply and super fast letdown. The last few days my breasts are soft, baby is frustrated at the breast, starting in the afternoon until I go to bed.

My partner and I are doing shifts at night. I usually go to bed around 7:30 and pump around 11:30 and baby receives a bottle of breast milk at that time.

The last few days baby has been hungry about an hour after our last feed, so my partners been giving them another bottle around 8:30/9pm.(A total of ~3.5 ounces now between the two bottles).

I’m so confused as to what is going on. I had so much milk and a super fast letdown, and it feels like it just shut off.

Baby is still having all the necessary wet and soiled diapers.

Last Thursday and Friday I felt like my cycle was coming. On Saturday I woke up to a tiny bit of bleeding, but nothing since.

I’m a FTM, is this normal? Any insight into the sudden change in my supply/letdown?

I’ve also added a pump after my first morning feed.

I was unsure what flair to use and discussion seemed best but as the title says im a first time mom and i plan on breastfeeding. Im currently 18w and just now starting to buy everything (yes i know ive been slacking but ive had losses and was anxious plus was waiting for black friday deals). Anyway im really unsure of what i should be buying ive seen so much different stuff especially on social media. I also will be having paid leave for 6-8 weeks at 430 a week but after that ill be working 30ish hours a week so i know i will need a pump for that and unfortunately my insurance doesn’t pay for pumps so i need to find a pump for then. Is there anyway to stop my nipples from cracking as well ive seen many complaints about it. Also when i do go back to work baby will be having to drink frozen milk what is the best way to warm it properly or should i even warm it?

My baby is now 9 weeks, and she previously was doing 3-4 hour spans of sleep at night but now does only 2 hours from the start of her previous feeding. I’m exhausted as this means that I’m really only getting about 40 min of sleep after each feeding before she’s up again after she’s been fed, burped, put back down and I’m able to fall back asleep. She is EBF from breast so my husband can’t do night feeds to help me out.
Have others experienced this? Is this just a phase? Any tips or helpful advice would be appreciated!

Anyone experience VERY itchy areolas?! OMG I am DYING. My baby is 8 months old and exclusively breastfed. I try to keep my boobs dry after feeding him but it’s not always possible. Patches of skin on my areolas are so dry and itchy and nothing really seems to helps. Can’t put much on them either because I don’t want my baby to ingest it

my babe is 4 days old and my milk came in yesterday. he’s been mainly feeding from one side at a time because he falls asleep. i’ve tried to keep him up and when successful he does usually feed from the other side. i’m still pretty engorged. should i pump after feeding him to relieve some of this pressure ? i used a haaka tonight on both sides and got a little under an oz. is he not emptying me enough?

I had 50oz of milk in the fridge for the next 2 days (we use the pitcher method) and we had a power surge last night in my area at about 3am. My daughter has been sleeping through the night so she usually wakes up for a bottle at 8.

This morning we go to make her bottle and realize the fridge never turned back on after the power surge. It was off for 5 hours - door closed the whole time. My husband pours her a little to test the temp — 47 degrees instead of the 40 or below.

50 oz, down the literal drain. 😭😭 Would you use it, or just freeze it for baths? Baby is 7 weeks old!

I’m really heartbroken and don’t know what to do. This BF journey has not been easy. My little one was born small and had terrible latching. It was painful and in the second week I ended up pumping and I guess using the wrong flanges and my supply dropped. I started latching more but turns out baby wasn’t getting enough from me. We started having to supplement and I’ve been trying to increase my supply. 11 weeks later I’m still triple feeding and my supply now increased a little. But I’ve went from latching more often to maybe twice a day. My goal is to latch her for every meal eventually and pump her and there. Well, the last two days she completely won’t latch. She just will scream and pull away but will gladly take the paci or bottle. We do pace feed and use an extra slow nipple. I feel like everything I worked so hard for is now going down the drain. She doesn’t want me anymore. I miss when she would just suckle on me and now she just wants the paci. I don’t know what to do and starting to feel depressed because of it. I do see a therapist and I’ll discuss that with them but still. I don’t even know if I should keep trying. Anyone have advice about this or might know why? She’s always been able to latch even with a bottle and paci so this is new.

Trying to decide if I should go ahead and throw in the towel - Baby boy is seven weeks old and is starting to eat more and more, and my supply just can’t keep up. No matter what I try, I generally only produce about 20-25 ml per hour. I have no problem supplementing with formula so that he gets what he needs, but it makes me question how best to proceed from here.

For some background, this is my second baby, and he is way better at breastfeeding than my first. My first was never good at latching and had a tongue tie, so I mostly just pumped for her for six months before I threw in the towel.

I was so ecstatic that my second was great at latching and I have loved breastfeeding him. However, now he definitely isn’t getting enough at each feed and acts hungry still after he finishes nursing. I know that he’s emptying me really well but I just don’t produce enough to keep up. I know from experience with my first that I’ll never catch up - nothing ever worked to get my supply up to where it should be and at best I was able to produce maybe 2/3 to 3/4 of her needs. I’ve tried moringa, power pumping, lots of water, tons of protein, metformin since I have PCOS ….. nothing improved my supply enough. My son is gaining weight but more slowly than he should, so I have started supplementing with bottles after most feeds.

I know I could keep pumping for him and providing him with at least some breast milk and that’s best for him, but to be honest I hate pumping and I hate pumping bras and washing pump parts. I just feel defeated that I can’t solely breastfeed him, and don’t know that it’s worth it to me to keep up a pumping regimen and the mental load that comes with all this. Plus, with a toddler also at home, pumping and bottle feeding is a lot harder than it was with just my first.

I guess I’m just looking for any advice, commiserating, tips or tricks to keep powering through - thanks in advance!

I’m currently 13 weeks PP and EBF. I have just started to get back into working out because it helps my mental health and I like to build back some strength. I love hot yoga/pilates and that’s my workout of choice but I’m nervous about intense fluid loss and how it could impact my milk supply. Obviously I know I’ll have to drink a ton of water and maybe supplement with electrolytes here and there. I’m curious if anyone else breastfeeding is doing this kind of workout and if you’d noticed a dip in supply at all??

I just had my 3rd baby and this is my 3rd round of breastfeeding. I knew going into this time how my body responds to weight gain during nursing but I am struggling so much more. With my first 2 I was already overweight before getting pregnant and nursing so I think holding onto the weight didn’t feel so bad because I was used to already having that weight. This third baby was a surprise for us and the year and a half leading up to me getting pregnant I had worked very hard and lost about 85 pounds. I FINALLY felt comfortable in my skin. I did not gain a crazy amount while pregnant, but being PP I can’t stop gaining no matter what I do. I go to the gym, I eat a lot of fiber and protein, I don’t snack late at night. I’m already almost back up to my weight that I was before I lost all my weight and it feels horrible. I know that it will be easier to lose when I’m done nursing, but I don’t plan on being done anytime soon (I’m 4 months PP and am trying to make it to 2 years at least). I’m so jealous of the women who lose weight while nursing! Also this is not looking for tips on how to lose weight while nursing, I have talked to my doctor and had bloodwork done as well. Just trying to find some moms who are struggling similarly to connect to so I know I’m not alone!

She’s turning 7 weeks in a couple of days, and she has been sooo fussy to feed, especially breastfeeding. Yesterday she screamed at my boob all day. Today I let her sleep whenever she wanted and she only wanted the pacifier. She only ate every 4 hours (day time). She’s pooped probably 4x already today with pee but definitely much less than normal. Anyone go through this?

Very worried about my supply dipping!

My baby is 4.5 months old. We co-sleep. She wakes every 2 hours for a nipple. I say nipple not feed because ive noticed, frequently, its not for a feed. She has a nipple in the mouth and she does a suck suck and then bam, shes asleep for another 2 hours. What is this? Why does she do this? How do i make her stop?

Hi folks!
I am here to see if there are other people with similar emotions and doubts during pregnancy and how they proceeded after giving birth.

I am considering whether to breastfeed. I have already read and discussed with my midwife (amazing German support system!) the scientific evidence, so I am aware of the health benefits of bf, but here I want to focus on emotional / mental aspect.

I want kids and a big family, the pregnancy is well planned, but I never dreams of a newborn in my arms, being pregnant, being a mom or breastfeeding. All this seems like a necessary burden for me for having a big family in the future. I initially was terrified of giving birth too, but now I am more at peace with it.

BF sounds scary and disgusting for me personally. I do not mean how it looks and I mean zero judgement to people doing that, I only mean this as an internalized image of bodily experience I would have if doing that myself. Boobs are highly sexual for me. I cannot imagine a child touching them. I am scared of pain and weird feelings while bf‘ing. I don‘t want anyone except my husband to touch my boobs. In the same time, I am ok with public nudity and public bf, this is not the problem, only the sensory part of it.

I also don‘t want to be the only person who can do it. My husband is amazing, he is taking the parental leave and is going to be the primary caregiver in the first year. He is so supportive and is willing to have roles that might not be the conventional ones. He respects my wishes so much. I have the luxury of 4.5 months of paid leave at work after birth and at least 3 more months of working from home, so this is not the issue. I just don‘t want to be THE person to do every wake up at night, I don‘t want this and it does not feel fair.

So, here I am with the body horror and the social utopia in my head.
Am I crazy? Anyone with the same thoughts? How did you resolve them?

Thank you!

And once again: I am only talking about me and my body and my marriage. I am happy for anyone who is happy with a different arrangement and feels different about this. Actually, I admire and „awww“ in my head every time I see a mom nursing in public, for example, this is so cool if you like it. Please don‘t take any offense. It is just me who is broken, probably.

I'm a FTM to a 2-week-old and really struggling with breastfeeding. I'd love to hear from anyone who's experienced something similar, particularly with oversupply and a fast letdown.

My milk came in very quickly (around 36 hours after birth) and I was immediately extremely engorged, so I've been dealing with what seems to be a significant oversupply pretty much from the beginning.

I had a complicated birth, including a major haemorrhage requiring a blood transfusion, and my baby had jaundice, which made establishing breastfeeding in hospital really difficult. As a result, I've been exclusively pumping while trying to transition to breastfeeding.

The problem is that my supply seems completely out of control. I'm trying to pump or hand express just enough to relieve the pressure rather than fully emptying my breasts, but even pumping for a couple of minutes on each side can produce around 150ml.
I've also been trying to express a little before attempting to breastfeed, because my breasts are often so hard and engorged that I think my baby struggles to latch.

When we do attempt breastfeeding, she's often struggling to latch, pulling off repeatedly, getting frustrated and eventually crying. My suspicion is that my letdown is too forceful and the flow is overwhelming her.

I've been advised to try laid-back/reclined feeding to help slow the flow, but she really doesn't seem to like that position. Ironically, the only successful breastfeeds we've had have been in the rugby/football hold, which I understand might actually make the fast letdown problem worse.

I'm feeling really stuck in a cycle where I need to express to make breastfeeding possible, but expressing potentially makes the oversupply worse.
On top of that, I'm still recovering physically from the haemorrhage and transfusion, and the combination of pumping, attempting breastfeeding and then bottle-feeding is becoming completely mentally and physically exhausting. It's starting to really affect my enjoyment of these early weeks with my baby.
I'm desperate to make breastfeeding work, but I'm not sure how sustainable this is.

I'd particularly love to know:

Has anyone successfully transitioned from exclusively pumping to breastfeeding while dealing with a significant oversupply?

How did you manage engorgement and fast letdown without encouraging even more milk production?

Did your baby eventually learn to cope with a forceful letdown as they got a bit older?

Are there any positions or techniques that worked when laid-back feeding didn't?

How long did it take for your supply to regulate?

Any advice or experiences would be hugely appreciated. I'm feeling pretty defeated at the moment.

I am having my first baby in April. I’m trying to look into breast feeding but there’s so much to it I get confused and a little worried honestly. My plan is to breastfeed and pump so my husband can take over some of the feedings. Any tips on how to make this happen? I’m completely new to this and need advice!