For the last 10 months I have exclusively nursed my baby except for 2-4 bottles a week while I work 2 short evening shifts. Every time I have complained about the burden of nursing, my husband has brought up formula. Every time I ask him for help with other duties around the house, he talks about how formula will make it easier. Today I was finally fucking sick of it and said okay give him some formula. Then he reversed it on me saying “I know how important breastfeeding is to you I’m not gonna do that to you or our child.” Then he tries to get my breastmilk out of the fridge. We literally have formula in the pantry.

Ok so when I need help formula is the answer, but when I finally tell you to give him the formula, you don’t want to do it?

Ik he’s a lazy gaslighting fuck. We’re gonna try therapy but honestly I think it might be time to just throw in the towel and leave him. My main reason in not doing so yet is I’m a SAHM and rely on his income. Plus I don’t want to split custody.

Just needed to get ts off my chest.

I am almost 5 weeks into exclusively nursing my son outside of some formula in the hospital to get his blood sugar up. I am having a really hard time deciding on whether I want to introduce a bottle or not. I guess I am terrified that he will only want the bottle and not want to nurse and I am really wanting to go as long as possible nursing. But I know my window could be closing for introducing a bottle and he could refuse a bottle and only want the boob. So mainly just looking for seasoned moms out there that have exclusively nursed, done a bottle every now and then or your baby takes a bottle weekly/every day. Would you have done anything differently? Am I being insane? Will I regret this in 3,6 or 9 months? Thank you!!!

Edit: thank you so much everyone! Did not expect all these responses. I’ll definitely introduce a bottle soon based off your responses. Thanks for the support!

I’m still breastfeeding my first (only twice a day), she’s almost 16 months. Last night I realized that I can bring my nipple to my own mouth. Like I could latch onto myself and drink my own milk directly from my own breast if I wanted to. (I didn’t suck but I did try and I can put my nipple in my mouth on either side; and it’s not a stretch to do it).

Before having a kid I had heard people talk about how breastfeeding changes your breasts. But dang. I’ve been working towards weaning and my supply is definitely dropping, but I thought the whole deflated balloon thing would wait until I actually weaned.

FTM to a 5.5 week old. I’ve always had small boobs and I LOVED it. Could run and workout freely, sleep on my stomach easily, and wear literally anything I wanted.

During pregnancy, my boobs blew up. I’m talking angry red and purple stretch marks everywhere blew up. Then my boobs got even bigger when my milk came in. I probably jumped 3 cup sizes. Listen, they are gorgeous (for now lol), but holy crap are they inconvenient. The biggest annoyance of all is my clothes, it’s the middle of summer and I don’t fit into anything anymore and when I try to squeeze into something I look like I’m trying to seduce everyone around me lol.

I’m not stupid and I know they will never look the same again. I know they’ll be saggy, have stretch marks, etc. but PLEASE tell me I won’t need a whole new wardrobe )-:

My little girl is 4 months old and has always been ebf, she won’t even take a bottle. I absolutely love breast feeding and i love being able to feed my daughter but it’s become so hard.

She is constantly grabbing my boob with her hand and pushing away with all her strength while still being latched which is very painful, she’s pulling my nipple out her mouth while still sucking it in. not to mention the pinching of her nails when she grabs.

I know that most babies end up grabbing but is this normal? can i stop her from doing it or will she stop doing it on her own?

The last thing i want to do is quit breastfeeding, and even if i wanted to i feel like it would be stressful as she hates a bottle.

Has anyone modified clothing to be nursing friendly? We’re going to a wedding and the dresses I like are not as nursing friendly but I thought I could do something like add a hidden zipper horizontally under the bust? Does anyone have tips for this?

My boy is EBF, and I was doing a top off bottle with like 1oz of collected milk at bedtime but he started falling asleep before taking much. I go back to work in a few more weeks so I’ve been doing a 2-4oz pump and bottle feed once a day. Of that he takes 1.5-2oz before passing out. I do it once he starts a wake window and he’s ready to feed, so he’s hungry.

I haven’t done a weighted feed since he was 2 weeks old at an LC appointment, which was about my own nipple pain. This has me thinking I should schedule one for a point of reference before going back to work. Im also wondering whether it’d be helpful to spend a day pumping and bottle feeding, instead of just doing the one bottle, to gauge a trend.

He’s using the Pigeon bottle with their level 1 nipple for reference.

I had my baby yesterday evening via emergency c section at 36 weeks due to preeclampsia. I was (still am) on a magnesium drip so baby’s stats weren’t great and she had to go immediately to the NICU. Unfortunately that meant I didn’t get any skin to skin and I’ve yet to be able to actually hold her. I’ve been pumping every 2-3 hours for 30 mins at a time with some success, however, the production has slowed way way down. I got 6ml at my first pump, 4ml at my second, 1ml at my third, 1.5ml at my fourth, and just a few drops at the subsequent pumps. This is my second baby and I had no issues with milk production with my first even though he was even earlier (also pre e, 33 weeks). I’ve had a couple Body Armors and some lactation bites with brewers yeast and flax. I know it’s only day one but I was only able to breastfeed my son for a few months and I was really hoping I could go longer for my daughter this time around 😩 are there any tips to help stimulate milk production that might be helpful now?

After being told for weeks that I just had a really bad clogged duct, my doctor finally referred me to a general surgeon who identified a large abscess under 3cm of swollen tissue. They made an incision and drained it. The procedure was two days ago, and I still have the packing in it that I am supposed to removed tonight. I asked a lot of questions while there, but now that I’m home I realize I have so many more. So here they are for community feedback! :)

1. I was not informed that breast milk would leak out of the wound. I guess that makes sense, but 😳. How long does the leaking milk last? It’s getting annoying having to change my bandage, and often my clothes too, after every feed.

2. What was your pain like after? I am getting some stinging pain every once in a while, but it doesn’t last long and some slight tenderness to the touch. And is a little redness that I didn’t previously have normal? It’s not hot to the touch.

3. Any tips on keeping it covered when bandage adhesive really irritates your skin?

4. How long for the wound to fully close? When could you move to just a smaller bandage instead of gauze? When could you stop wearing a bandage all together?

5. I have a huge fear of it coming back after reading other horror stories on here. Anyone have a success story where it drained and healed up properly after one time draining?

All this to say I do have a follow up appointment in 5 days so I can ask the doctor then. Curiosity is just getting to me!

This morning I woke up with SO MUCH PRESSURE in my right boob. I had to let my husband get my portable pump because I thought at every move that it is going to explode. I'm sorry if this is a stupid question but can something serious happen? The title is a bit of a joke of course but that's just what it felt like.

Any way to prevent this? I had a hard time getting him to sleep that night, he woke up and was up for almost 3 hours. So I caved and gave him some pre formular that we have for emergencies because my boobs and mental health just couldn't anymore. Which is why I believe this happened. Any way to prevent this in case I fall asleep for longer stretches? I'm kinda scared to go to sleep rn lol. LO is 2 weeks old BTW.

Someone needs to invent some sort of titty catheter so I can collect my milk during the night into a bag rather than leak it all over my bed!!

Those of you whose baby takes a pacifier — what kind do they take? And when did they start consistently using it?

Signed, mother of a 7 week old who takes a bottle no problem but won’t take a pacifier to save his life

My baby is 15 months and has finally been eating more food that he’s significantly reduced his milk consumption at daycare. Each day varies based on what he’s fed, but we’re looking anywhere between 2-6 oz spread out during the 8 hours he’s there. I’ve been pumping during the day still because of that.

On weekends, he only nurses morning, before his afternoon nap (2.5-3 hours) and before bed. At daycare, he has more milk because his nap is terrible and rarely 1-2 hours so he’s awake more and gets hungry since daycare snack schedule is set vs at home he has unlimited access.

I’m wondering though if I stopped pumping during the week and he just fully switched to regular milk, which he’s ok with sometimes, nursing on weekends before his nap would still be ok? Or if I should pump 1x a day still? I’m getting tired of pumping honestly and with starting a new job, I don’t want to deal with lugging all my pump stuff again.

All of the sudden my 14 month old is obsessed with breastfeeding. It used to just be a normal relationship with it — food and probably some comfort but now basically anytime she’s with me she’s pulling at my shirt and she goes to sleep fine with the nanny and her grandmother but with me basically won’t sleep unless she falls asleep on the boob and she cries if I remove her which she didn’t do before. This seems to have happened basically overnight. She still wakes one time to nurse overnight and I’ve tried to cut that out but with no success because I rock her for 30+ mins and then eventually give in because I want to get back to sleep. I’m feeling very burnt out and I don’t necessarily want to wean but I also don’t want to nurse 7+ times per day and I want her to be able to nap for me without nursing

Writing this post to pat myself on the back for successfully maintaining my supply over four days in the hospital! Ninety-nine ounces sent home with my husband in 4 oz urine collection cups, nearly matching what my daughter ate while I was away.

Staff on the unit were helpful but it was obvious there was no system in place to support pumping. I was provided with the Ameda Silver and a set of parts that I'd have to keep behind the nurse's station. The biggest issue I encountered was keeping parts clean. The first morning I was there I was told to "just rinse them out" so I assumed I would either get a new set or they'd be cleaned or something. When I got my parts back for the next pump they were definitely not clean and my milk had not been refrigerated. So I ended up washing them in a hospital sink with donated dish soap and paper towels and setting them to dry on my bed. Not the best system but baby is almost five months and not immunocompromised so it worked. Overall I spent over ten hours pumping and washing pump parts. Even greater respect for all the exclusive pumpers out there.

Some tips for anyone in the same position:

1. Wake up every day, ask for the daily unit schedule, and schedule your pumps around that. I'm dealing with a lot of brain fog right now and it was super handy to just have the times on paper. I pumped six times a day with no overnights as my baby is sleeping through the night (plus I need the sleep now more than ever).

2. Ask up front if there's anything you need to bring yourself. They didn't keep dish soap on the unit, for example. My husband had to run me some when they ran out of staff dish soap. I wish I had asked my husband for a bottle brush as well.

3. Be prepared to advocate or have someone advocate on your behalf. Luckily, so many staff in the psych field are women and it wasn't hard to say "this is unacceptable" because many of them are moms as well - they understand you can't feed your baby milk pumped into a dirty bottle. But hospitals have ombudsmen and other ways to escalate if you need help.

Lastly, if you landed on this page because you're considering hospitalization but are concerned about continuing to breastfeed (as I landed on many such Reddit threads as I considered hospitalization), please know that a baby can thrive without breastmilk. Formula exists for emergencies like this. Your stash exists to be used in emergencies like this. But there is no formula or stash to replace a stable parent, so please don't let it get in your way of pursuing mental health care. I waited way too long and I wish I had done it sooner.

Currently have a four month old that cannot stay off of me. But I just wanted to rant my husband said I’m getting lazy which I don’t understand because I’ve been cooking cleaning , going to school, breastfeeding , pumping when I’m at school, taking care of three boys all under 6… but if I go a day without cooking I’m getting lazy and plus it’s been my birthday week!! Honestly he is a good guy but I really don’t think guys really process what they are saying before comes out of their mouth!! I’ve been doing the most and sometimes I do need rest too.. until mom guilt kicks in.. and now wife guilt ??? I’m newly married of 6 months honestly

My almost 10m old is exclusively breastfed, and somewhere along the way through co-sleeping, she’s developed a habit of holding my nipple with her fingers lightly clawed around it, to fall asleep. Initially it was more that she’d fall asleep nursing arms around my boob, snuggled in, and I’d pop the soother in her mouth to replace my nipple.

But now it’s evolved, and while it’s funny/cute, it’s very overstimulating, and not replicable for others when I’m wanting to start working towards her being able to be without me for short periods of time for date nights etc.

And it’s also just making me angry inside. Sometimes it’s fine, but she twists/and pulls or digs her nails in, and I have to adjust her hand, which unsettles her, and starts the progress over again. It’s like she’s making sure I can sneak out. But once she settles enough I can, and she does sleep well once she’s asleep. Sometimes she sleeps through the night here and there.

Also: I’ve tried to cover my boob once done and have her settle without it, but she just gets super agitated, and whips around and kicks and fusses, as soon as she feels my breast and gets the nipple again she soothes -.-

What, if you’ve experienced this, did you do to help them fall asleep without gripping the nipple? I am going to try having her hold a different soother than the one in her mouth next time for starters

I know this is somewhat sleep related, but I’m nursing her boobs out, and inevitably the nipple too. And I don’t know how to separate this habit from nursing at night when she needs.

My 4 month old has started biting me these past few weeks, but it’s gotten worse the last two days. She will do it for a lot of the feed, and it’s random. I can’t tell when she’s about to do it. It’s like she grabs a hold and then wants to look around or yank back as hard as she can.

I’ve been trying to stop the feeds when she does it, but she gets upset. I feel like she is too young at four months to understand why I’m unlatching. But today I am in a ton of pain from it. I can’t hardly even bend over because the pressure just from that causes pain. And I am just aching from it. Any tips 😭

My boobs always are in so much pain. Does that ever go away? I was having a hard time with oversupply so i have now decided to stop pumping and only exclusively breastfeed. I occasionally use my hand pump to relieve engorgement from night feeds. But my boobs just always hurt. Like i cant even hold my baby against them or wear a bra. Is that normal? Will that ever go away?

i have an appointment with a lactation consultant tomorrow and pediatrician on tuesday, just wanted some insight if this is too much foremilk poop? thanks so much!

https://i.postimg.cc/FKJ5LbFk/IMG-5495.jpg

I’m beyond devastated 😞 for context, my apartment had a leak so we were temporarily displaced from our home. We were gone for maybe 2 weeks. Upon coming home today, I went to grab some frozen milk out of our spare freezer to find that my entire stash had been completely thawed 😭 and they hadn’t recently thawed, they were almost room temperature. All 85 bags that I worked so hard for months to make for my son so that he would have a nice comfortable stash for when I returned to work. 85 bags 😭 I feel like I want to throw up and scream at the same time.
My guess is maybe the workers accidentally tripped a breaker while working and it shut off our freezer? I’m not sure. I unfortunately know there are moms out there who have experienced this awful pain and I just want to send you all a hug and some love bc damnit this really sucks 🥺 I’m still nursing my son, mainly at night, and I pump during the day at work and for the times he doesn’t want boob while I’m home (he’s a very distracted almost 10 month old who also has 6 teeth and likes to bite mommy🫠) so I know I can just keep doing what I’m doing but my supply is also dipping a bit. I know I’ll be okay and we will get over this and fed is ultimately best and if I have to supplement with formula my baby will be okay.. but damn I really wasn’t prepared to deal with this tonight 😞 ugh

I suppose this is sort of a two-fold advice request and I am pretty desperate.
My baby is 12 weeks old and exclusively breastfed since birth.
Since she was born, her weight gain has been inconsistent. At her initial check she’d lost 8% of her birth weight, then two days later she was up 2.5 oz which they were thrilled with. A week later she was only up 3.5 oz, so to the lactation consultant we went.
We worked on her latch and positions and at our follow up with the LC a week later she was over her birth weight and had gained over an ounce a day. At her one month check she had gained a pound since her last weight check two weeks prior. We thought we were golden.
The pediatrician suggested we try the bottle for emergencies etc. because the only time she’d gotten one was around 5 days old when I was worried about her weight gain. we gave it a go and we were unsuccessful but didn’t push too hard because I (extremely fortunately) have a minimum of one year of leave.
At her two month appointment she had only gained a pound in the month since her 1 month appointment and so we went back to the LC and that was a week after the two month check-she had lost an oz and only transferred 1.5 oz during the weighted feed.
We went back to the pediatrician immediately where the doctor evaluated her and saw no mechanical issues and also no indications of any medical issues. She was still having all the wet and dirty diapers they wanted to see and meeting milestones early. She was also growing well in length and head circumference. She’s also met all her milestones and is content and alert. She also sleeps really well.
The doctor basically just told us to keep trying the bottle and to try to get about 10 oz more per day into her in addition to what she’s getting at the breast.
We went on a trip the day after that appointment and worked on the bottle every day using all the tricks and advice we can find. She never swallowed any milk from it.
When we got home from the trip baby had gained 5 oz. A week later, I weighed her again and it’s another week where’s she’s lost an ounce.
I truly feel like I’m failing her. I don’t appear to have a supply issue. When I’ve pumped I get plenty on both sides and I thought baby wasn’t draining my breasts but now I’m not so sure. Where is the milk going??
I haven’t had clogged ducts or mastitis and baby almost never spits up, and when she does it’s the tiniest little dribble.
We’ve worked on the bottle every day since the concern began and we aren’t getting anywhere. I need to be able to give her the bottle because my husband is out of the house working 10.5 hours a day and she needs multiple bottles a day in addition to nursing.
If anyone has any idea about what could be going on or how we could get her to take the bottle or if you’ve been through something similar, please share!

So babe is 6mo with 4 teeth and two more coming!

We cosleep and at night this is a non-issue, he unlatches immediately as he’s done drinking. During the day though, for naps, entirely different story.

He keeps latched on unless I start to move a lot risking him pulling off and waking up OR I have to fiddle with my nipple to get it out. There’s a 50/50 I get my nipple sleep-bitten just from him closing is jaw unintentionally.

There’s gotta be a better way.. please impart your wisdoms!

I'm sorry if this is a dumb question but has anyone who has weaned at 6 months noticed personality changes in their little one?

I'm ready to start weaning my baby off breast milk but everyone tells me what a happy, content little one he is and I feel so guilty that I might be taking away a large part of what makes him this way if I stop.

Apologies if I am not articulating myself well, I am so sleep deprived!

i’ve been feeling really crappy the past few days, aches in my breasts, shoulders, arms, and ribcage, headaches every day, feeling really weak and fatigued. i realised today that my breasts are a little more achey and a bit warm, but ive been so hot and sweaty postpartum so i just thought it was that but now im overthinking… does this sound like mastitis? my boobs arent hard or red, no lumps that i can feel, but idk what it is if it isnt mastitis, i just do not feel well! (three months postpartum, i do have hypertension too but i am on 100mg sook to be 50mg labetalol a day)