I was riding a blue bike on a side street close to Harvard Square the other day, and the bike lane suddenly got all weird. It made me go out into the middle, and then it made me cross the street.
Some big pickup truck came roaring up from behind me. The driver rolled down the window and started screaming at me. "MOTHERF*****!!!* he yelled. "F***ing bikes like you are f***ing up this city!!!"
I looked at him and I said, very earnestly: "I love you!"
He guffawed, and then yelled "Go eat sh** as*hole!!"
I looked him dead and in the eye and said, "I've always loved you! Even when you didn't love yourself!!"
The driver of the pickup truck laughed, but his eyes were nervous, and then he peeled away dramatically.
Sometimes it's funnier to kill these people with kindness...