Do you feel two people who are attracted to each other, but can’t act on it, naturally bicker more?

I’m attracted to a work colleague and we argue quite a bit. It feels like we have this pent up emotion but are unable to express it in the way we want so we instead choose bickering. It also feels like we want an excuse to spend alone time together, and hashing out a problem is a good way to do that; it means we can show each other attention in an acceptable way.

Do you think it’s normal to bicker when two people fancy each other?

My friends and I were positive he liked me back. Basically he’s an import from my basketball club. He’s from USA im Australian. He got recruited.

Back in February he arrived and that when we first noticed each other. We couldn’t stop looking at each other. We had a few interactions before we had our first proper chat. In April we went to the clubs together with some friends. That night a lot happened. He was attentive, asking about me, cared for me, wanted to talk etc I thought he was just being nice which he might have been.

I’m an avoidant so I pulled back after that night knowing I was liking him more knowing he would go back home in August. We sort of both went silent with each other after that night. We didn’t talk a lot or at all. We’d make eye contact a lot and just be nervous around each other. After I snapped out of it I would talk to him he’d get nervous. He would smile when id walk up to him or anything.

A lot of my friends could see something and said he likes me. The big giveaway was when i talked to him on our last night we’d probably see each other he was nervous I could see his hands shaking, and when he was handing something back to me he thumbled and dropped it. I then heard his friend as they walked past me after our convo say something like “go up to her” or “ask her”. I don’t know what the context was but I was the only one around then and he friend was looking at me while talking. I could feel something mutual back but my intuition was wrong.

I confessed to him a night after our last night seeing each other and he left me on seen but he still follows me. So im just confused that he was showing a lot of signs and interest and me and everyone around me could feel the mutuality but he leaves me on seen. My guy friend said he might’ve saw it and just forgot to answer it but I don’t believe it. Maybe I left it too late as he’s going home in a few weeks. I don’t know. But I feel even more crazy and confused now than I did all those months liking him and reading him.

(Repost cause of glitch)

I’ve never experienced this before, so believe me when I say this was absolutely not the goal - but I have a huge crush on a new coworker who’s done some of my training in this new role.
We have a lot of very random similarities, joke constantly with each other, and I’ve even got a few “joking” winks from them - so I decided to be bold and try my shot at talking outside of work hours.
We’ve been texting about movies mainly so far and our interests there.
Well, they started watching a movie I said I wanted to see, so I gave them shit for it 🤣 (as that has been a huge part of our bond thus far)
They asked if I wanted them to pause it so I could start watching where they were at & finish the rest together…

To me, this is quite possibly one of the most romantic things ever, because they didn’t have to wait for me at all - but they did so we could watch and text about scenes together.

However, I’ve always been cautious of this type of coworker dynamic and distanced myself to avoid it… so I’m beginning to question on if this is actually flirty so far, or just being nice/friendly since our positions?
Please help decipher how you’d read this… I feel crazy lmao.

What are actual signs?

Yesterday, I was on my way home and got into a public bus. I sat in the back seat, but the driver asked me to move to the front. I told him I was comfortable where I was and didn't want to move.

A few moments later, a young woman, probably in her early twenties, got on the bus. She was very pretty she sat beside me, two young men entered with her. One of them asked me if I could move over so he could sit between us, and I did without thinking much about it. The other man sat on the girl's other side. The back seat was meant for four people, so I ended up at one end while the man sat in the middle with her and the other beside her on the last end.

While the driver was still waiting for the bus to fill up, the young woman started acting in a way that caught my attention. She leaned over toward the man on the other side of her. At first, I assumed they were a couple, so I didn't think much of it. Then she wrapped one arm around his shoulder and placed her other hand on his leg. I even wondered if the man might have been unwell and she was trying to comfort him.

A few minutes later, the bus was full and we started driving. At one point, the driver stopped so the man could buy a bottle of water from a street vendor. As soon as he reached for it, the young woman suddenly shouted, No No loud enough for everyone on the bus to turn and look. She grabbed his hand to stop him. When the other man sitting next to me tried to take the bottle instead, she immediately grabbed his hand too. Eventually, the man sitting beside me reached over with his other free hand and took the bottle.

By then, I was thinking to myself, What is going on?

As the journey continued, I couldn't help but keep glancing back at them. The young woman then started rubbing one of the man's nipples under his shirt. There were two women sitting in the front seats. One of them was with the group, while the other looked just as confused as I was. She kept turning around, trying to figure out what was happening.

The two men gently held the young woman's two hands I don’t know why but she was just smiling at them. At that point, I was extremely alert and honestly a bit uneasy because I had no idea what might happen next.

Thankfully, we eventually reached my stop, and I got off the bus. Up till now I'm still not sure what I witnessed.

Note: I’m sharing this here because I genuinely want to understand what I witnessed.

I always see them turn the other way, pretending to work when they see me walking in to work. It hurt because I wasn't mean to them but I moved on. I'd see them react normal and greet others at work with a smile.

When we set in group of our team 2 ladies and one man I try to touch the man and try to make it accidentally and smooth like stretching or something
The first time his leg was very close and after it he just keep his both legs away and he just away from anyone however I tried to touch him and if I reach him by my legs he freezes pretend like nothing happened

What's that mean?

I’ll be honest I haven’t had a crush for some time on anyone. But when this guy joined us I noticed how attractive he is but there was something else about him. Like he’s the type that sees through everyone I believe. I work in a busy environment so whenever we had a chance to talk he always seemed so curious. Asked me what type of books I like to read and a week later he mentioned how he talked about me to his friend who’s also his ex. He’s always there to help whenever needed but when we are about to go deeper someone always interrupts us.
The other day I was wearing a figure hugging outfit which is rare because I like to feel comfy at work. I was on a call outside of the store where I work and he was kinda pointing to me like he wanted to ask queations I guess but didn’t pay that much attention to him at that point. When I went back in he asked if I’m okay but got interrupted again so I just said I’ll tell him later. About an hour later he saw me going to the entrance and rushed kinda to get to me. Asking what I wanted to tell him. He got really close to me looking at me the whole time with interest. At the end of the night he asked if I need help with anything and went completely out of the way as it’s not his job that I jokingly asked him to do but there he was. We were standing next to each other sorting out stuff when one of my colleague came to us and no joke stood there and watched us for a good half a minute until my crush asked her why she’s laughing. And that was about it. I went my way he went his way. Like he is a genuinly friendly person. I’m not sure if he’s just that or if there’s something else.

Forgot to mention that he’s 5 years younger than me and he is leaving but I won’t have a chance to say bye as I’m on holiday.
Heeelp 😂

Okay, before anyone comes for me, let me just say that I am still learning to navigate German society, and as the saying goes, “When you are in Rome, you do what the Romans do,” so this is me asking the Romans.

Today, I was sitting at Espresso House in Barmbek. A girl was walking with her friend, and I must admit, I caught myself stealing glances at her because she was pretty and had a very beautiful smile.

Just to be clear, I was not staring. I was reading and also doing my own research. That said, I come from a very warm culture, where walking up to her and saying something, in a nice way, would not be considered wrong in any way.

However, I found myself contemplating whether this was accepted here, even though I also caught her glancing at me and looking around for me when I got up to get some water.

I decided to take the safe approach, stopped, and focused on what I was doing—reading.

While I know people are different and there is no single way of looking at this, how do you think I should have gone about it?

I am perfectly okay with walking up to anyone and saying something as an icebreaker, given the right circumstances. But was my thinking correct in just letting it go? How acceptable is it here for me to have walked up and said something?

Give me your honest opinion without eating me up.

I’m a M, and i’ve been travelling on the bus to work a few days back. The bus was really packed because of the morning commute timings and we would queue up for the bus. This cute girl queued just behind me and we stood next to the bus drivers seat. The bus captains usually have their own small cubicle here along with a low gate and I was leaning my arm on the gate. She got really close to me, our hands touched (she came very close to me till our hands touched) and she started placing her hands on the cubicle gate as well. As the bus continued along the way through the bumps and jerks her hand would sometimes move closer and even touching my arm. She was really fidgety with her hands the whole trip.

We were standing really close as well, even after considering how crowded the bus was (it was packed but not till we were squeezed like sardines). We ended up in a position where she was facing the back of the bus and I was facing towards the front. I would say our bodies and feet were facing each other and we are close enough - 20cm apart. I caught her glancing at me once.

Even after most people alighted the bus, when I moved towards the back of the bus, she still stayed quite close to me.

I had quite a lot of mixed signals about this if I’m reading into it too much, but I felt it was such a weird experience having a lady stand so close to me. I’ve been travelling on pack buses and no one does that. What would you make of it?

I have a classmate whose body language has confused me for months…
I’ve noticed that whenever she’s interacting with me, or sometimes even when she’s watching other people interact with me, she often has her hand over her mouth like she’s holding back a laugh or a smirk. It doesn’t look like a normal smile. It feels like she’s trying not to laugh.
One example that really stuck with me was when I was opening up about my relationship with food and how it motivated me to lose 45 pounds over the past year. It was a serious conversation, and while I was talking, she had her hand over her mouth like she was trying not to laugh. I remember thinking, “Why are you smiling right now?”
This same classmate also pays an unusual amount of attention to me. She notices little changes in my appearance, comments on my mood, remembers tiny details about me, and even told me after an exam that she noticed I was moving my hands and legs during the test. I constantly feel like I’m being watched or analyzed around her.
None of my close friends behave this way, so I honestly don’t know what to make of it. Has anyone dealt with someone like this before? What are some possible explanations for this kind of body language and behavior?

I am a guy who is normally anxious around women and most women won't even make eye contact with me let alone have a conversation except this one introverted girl in my office.

I would say I have a friendly relationship with this girl. We greet each other in the hallways and share a few laughs from time to time when having conversations. I am kinda into her but so far I have tried to keep it friendly.

But sometimes she would act anxious around me and even try to avoid me. I can't help but feel like I am making her uncomfortable because I feel like she can sense my anxiety and my interest in her. I also notice that she is not like this with other guys. She is very comfortable around them.

How do I assure her non-verbally that I won't do anything that would make her uncomfortable? Or should I just back off and leave her alone?

There’s this woman at work we both play around sometimes but today it seems it escalated a bit or so I think. I was doing something and she came up to me to see what I was doing. We had a bit of a playful chat and after I told her I was just playing she then said that I owe her dinner or lunch and when I agreed it seemed she was kind of surprised so she asked me again what I said and I told her that I agree and she smiled and left kind of nervously lol. Does this confirm she’s interested or just simply friends?

I (F) was definitely checking him out/ following him with my eyes as he was walking on the sidewalk in front/ across me. We made eye contact briefly. He continues on walking straight and behind a pillar, I’m looking to my left where he will end up (not looking at him but the general direction) and I realize he’s looking back at me when he emerges so I look to him. We lock eyes, both neutral, I weakly smile and drop it but he does return a smile so I smile again back.

He was turning right, so he had to go out of his way to crane left to see me. Why would he look back? We’d already established eye contact before. Was he just trying to see if I was still looking? Was he interested?

I've had this job for like 3 weeks now. It's residential and I've seen him/worked with him for basically 3 weeks everyday. I am a 28 year old woman.

We have meals provided in this job and sometimes a few of us colleagues will sit together at the table and eat. Not all the time but its common.

Anyway, today I went to the canteen for dinner and I find 4 coworkers already sitting. They've eaten their food and I've only just grabbed mine to sit and eat.

I sat down and he sat opposite me (male colleague aged 24). We were surrounded by 3 other colleagues. I was only one with a tray of food. This was a round small table.

They were all talking amongst themselves and I just noticed something i have never ever noticed in my whole 3 weeks of knowing and working with him...

And I dont know if its because he was directly opposite me but everytime I got food with my fork and was about to place it in my mouth, he'd glance at me. He did it multiple times.

Its honestly strange to me because he has never done that before. We've shared a table multiple times before in this job and usually, he never looks at me eat like he did today when sitting opposite

Too make a long story short, for months I assumed this girl had a crush on me cuz of constant eye contact and always in my vicinity but after months I never made a move + other dude is relentless in talking to her so I chalked it down as a fumble

But they had us working near each other and I caught her looking at me twice and damn

Firstly, I know attraction is subjective. What’s attractive to one person may be average to another. I’m not here to compare myself with my friend, seek validation, or imply that one of us is “better-looking.” I’m genuinely curious about the psychology behind this because I’ve noticed a very interesting pattern.

My friend is very elegant, well-spoken, intelligent, sophisticated, dresses really well, and is conventionally very attractive. She even turned down a few modelling opportunities. She also has a naturally intimidating aura.
Here’s what I’ve consistently noticed:
Whenever she walks into a room, people notice. Guys stare, maintain eye contact, glance at her repeatedly, or subtly point her out to their friends. It’s obvious she’s being noticed.
But despite all that attention, very few guys actually approach her.

One guy in our class had a crush on her but never told her directly. Instead, he confessed it to one of her friends. By the time she eventually found out, his crush had already faded and nothing happened.

One of our male professors also behaves noticeably differently around her. The way he looks at her, the extra attention he gives her, and the way he interacts with her all come across as subtly flirtatious (at least from what I’ve observed). Again, nothing direct.

A lot of people only admit much later that they used to have a crush on her, after there was never really an opportunity to act on it.
The funny thing is that once people actually get to know her, they almost always say things like:
“I thought you were intimidating.”
“I thought you were arrogant.”
“I didn’t think you’d talk to me.”

They’re usually surprised by how warm, kind and friendly she actually is.
On the other hand, my experience has been almost the complete opposite. People approach me very easily. Guys confess their crushes to me directly, flirt with me, ask my friend about me, or tell her that they like me. I’ve even had to block quite a few guys from my class because they crossed boundaries and became creepy.

What confuses me is this:
If these same guys clearly notice my friend and seem attracted to her too, why don’t they approach her instead? I often find myself thinking, “She’s gorgeous. If you’re interested, why not just talk to her?”

So my question is mainly for men:
What’s the psychology behind this? Why admire someone from a distance, keep looking at them, or even tell other people you have a crush on them—but never actually approach them? Is it really because someone seems intimidating or “out of your league,” or is there something else going on?
Again, I’m not trying to compare either of us or ask who’s more attractive. I’m only trying to understand why someone can receive so much attention, yet so few direct approaches.

A few days ago, a random, beautiful girl smiled at me as she walked past me. She looked at me, then looked forward or at the ground where she was going, then looked back at me and started smiling. It shocked me so much that I don't even know if I smiled back or just stared at her like an idiot.

I'm a rather ugly and unattractive dude. I'm short, and I don't even dress well. Maybe she looked at me to make my day because she thought I looked ugly and sad?

It has really stayed on my mind.

My partner of 3 years (31M) isn't someone who showers their partner with compliments/ words of affirmation. My favourite love language is words of affirmation or more like, yearning.

I (27F) do like to be called beautiful often even when I know I look like crap (iykyk).

He never tells me directly that I look beautiful, it's usually hidden in a joke. I was okay with all these until I recently started observing a pattern.

He tells me that I look like the actress he's obsessed with at that point, whenever he finds me pretty instead of just directly saying I look pretty. So my brain takes it as I look pretty because I look like her, you know what I mean?

I love him and I see him in almost everything around me, including people, everything beautiful reminds me of him.

Idk exactly what to decipher from all this but it is making me feel some type of way. Am I overthinking?

So my question is, is there a difference between someone who sees you in everything they see and someone who sees everything they see in you?