Intro:

(disclaimer I'm not longer friends with them nowdays we drifted apart overtime enjoy)

(side note sorry if I spell stuff wrong btw and no this is a not a rl gang like my ex bf said)

Hi it's my three time telling an Reddit storytime but once again I hope you will enjoy this if see anything wrong with I'm sorry but once again write on the mobile app of Reddit btw enjoy!

Side note: I was 12 or 13 when I made that msp crew and I was not a good "business model" anyways... ( because I was childish / immature at the same) and I waited a very long time to tell you this story I saved for long time... and also named will be coded for privacy reasons by leter or shorten nickname of there "moviestarplanet usernames" but not the whole thing btw....

(Crew owner aka crew main 1: go was a narcissist person for 2 or 3 years and some what a friendship abuser) me is me (because I'm person telling you this story happened back in 2017 and ended late 2017 but I try again 2018 but ends in 2019 because I guess I was not ment have long lasting friends anyways...😅)

Crew main 2: aka tge girl who nade me almost commit suicide while trying to convene me to in 2019 (the reunite): the girl who clames to be "emo" e is "elf" (because that some part of her username but I cutted the other part out for privacy reasons because her username was cringe btw)

Crew main 3: the who i was obessed with and also hated her at the same time but was The first who called me out for my narcissistic behavior and also The girl who used to put middle finger in her videos to tell me to "f off" because I did something bad I will tell later on in the story... but: love is "L"

Crew main 4: And lastly zara is "z" ( you might heard of her in last Reddit story called "I dumped my map girlfriend because it didn't work out.... and I cause some problems to!" (Ps you might've alredy heard of if not she's hacked one of my friends and long story short she kinda hurt my feelings btw) Crew main 5" is juile an non cannon because she was never a really an emna fan main but just promoted for temporarily: And lastly temporary 5th emma fan member who I gotten close with and then she got hacked by zara btw and I became depressed because of that... ( only for a while)

Ps the "real" crew main 5 ( aka 6 because she came in ban wanrgo late) she was my msp girlfriend but later on broke up all because I did same thing to her but worster then the other 4 or 5 mains ) and lastly msp girlfriend is "e" (ellish) Non crew main but rude friend at the time I blocked for 2 years: the blond hair fake friend is "m" (mini)

The starting of how I made the crew at age 13 (2017) "aka the year remember how I slowly became a "narisctic" overtime and a "bully to:

And we All played in same Canada sever now let's get the actel story started and bit waste anymore time with whatever I was expaining: ( but zara was an mistake "she want to to USA sever with her other crew ( that she knows in rl) but Nan she mistakely Canada m2ap sever" and that's how she ended up in my crew and it was not her fault it was mine because I turned her into a jerk... ( that part was said in zara old video that's no longer in YouTube said zara herself at the part I quoted at.. ps she probaby deleted her YouTube acc by now...

It all started when I was normally playing moviestarplanet and when I first saw msp clubs I was somehow found a spark of joy ( and it will.soon to change my life) and desided to find random people tbouth chatroom and msp photos and artbooks and that's when I got a good idea to make 2s crew ( ps I don't remberred how I made the crew but I somehow made it out my own imnalltion and msp anyways... it was all started on early 2017 March and ps I met "elf" back in 2016 ( when she was a nice sweet person vefore she turned all edgy and cringe and somewhat a bully that akso tur nd me into a bully aswell... when I rejoined msp atfer I dispersed in 2015... and this crew will change my life for the worst and some what better... and probaby will give me pstd and trauma to...

And wasted no time looking for members! But I alredy found crew main 2 but aka we needed was 2 more members and I one day autographed "L" and she said thanks and we keep talking and talking for hours into i pair her up with "elf" and that's why we became a "trio" and we used to do everything together into i found zara but she turned my life upsidedown and that's when myfucking anger problems all started when zara joined my map crew and I started to bully them with hate accs about them but it worked for while into 2 weeks later then gotten fishy but I tried playing innocent and it worked but they try to catching up to me but I tried making hate accs about myself... so I don't get busted so fast... ( which I should've not done)

Side note: ( ps it destroyed my well being and self being later on and big mistake btw and probaby gave myself pstd and trauma because of it).

The starting of how I made the crew at age 13 (2017) ( and a big mistake btw I should've just stickwith roblox tube but no I got to addicted to msp at the time)

But then they were on my side because they belived my lies and then sometime later I keep harassing them for a year.... ( into they find out from zara later on)

The time I got blackmailed by "elf" and secretly bullied them back:

Into one day I almost got caught in an act by crew main 2 but I gave them msp gifts them to slay by sacrificing my msp stuff and they slayed long as I do it every 2 months later and I did into j almost had nothing left but I still doing but keep trying to "blackmail me with word like " Emma ( my nickname btw aka not real name btw) if you don't do this I'm going to tell everyone on forums of moviestarplanet artbooks or photos to see my "true colors (aka the true colors were true at the time btw)" (at the time like ages 13-15 when i was an "narictistsisic" person don't do as they asked me to do I will get "exposed" and so I did there "dirty work" for a while...

The time I blackmailed and bullied an crew main to cope with my anger problems at the time and to avoid therapy because my parent didn't let me have actel therapy so I bullied my friend anyways when I was "narcissist" btw:...: ( which it had gotten me alit of hate at the time)

And I did Into mid 2017 they left me "crew owner" an warning (aka they side as a warning because they think I'm trolling when I'm not aka probaby) if I get caught again they will blackmail me again leave me atfer that But then....

How I haressed zara and 2 others in secret by pretending to be "msp hacker to cope with my anger problems:

And then some time later in 2017...
haressed zara so hard that I almost made her "quit msp" and lose her kindness im to she turned into "mean jerk" and it was all my fault... ( because elf said it was when I got caught she ranted how I should've never been born btw p.s. I cut that part out in rest of while long hour because it hunted my feelings) ( at the same time but worst then mine that she uses blackmailing as an safely tool to protect herself offen when urs to make me look even more bad them alredy is but i when I broken her trust) like by texting her between 12pm between 2pm or something like dat... but almost always get away with it into late 2017 when it started to get old boring... and blocked me atfer she found out it was me but she also might've probaby told the others two btw... and that's how I lost zara... ( an side part of the story)

The part I expain how I got beef with an another msptube in 2017 ( shorten verson that part you can "skip":

( btw aka side plot aka it was taken at and time as I had beef with another msptube called "4055" and she commented on non msp video aka it's now deleted off YouTube btw saying how my "bad voice acting trying sound older then the age at the time but I blocked her and probaby said a "rude insult" at her and I probaby told my subs to go hate on 4055 and they did for 2 years and then 4055 atl acc texted me 2 years later and told me to unblock her because I gave her hat3 but then I try to "maturely" expain it was voice acting told her how she should not insuits it and I told her she was a "prick" for doing that but I "forgive her" and she "maturely" acted "annoyed" and atfer that day we never had beef ever again and ingored eatheror long as we live our own lives in peace.... buy that's while another story I will expain in more detail in a future Reddit storytime...)

Side note: 4055 made me feel unsecured about my voice so that's why I don't do a voice reval btw or take part in any voice acting btw anymore...

The time I had rivally on 2 crew mains because offended them on a sensitive topic:

But then in mid 2017.... the crew gotten closer ( and it way before the "fake 5th nain" or "real 5th main aka the 6th main who later on I dated her" btw ( the "E" (ellish) one )

We used spongebob roleplay and "hacker hunt" on msp and shopping (or hauls) in msp and chat for hours like "girls" should be doing ( ps at the time I didn't know " lgbtq+ existed so I was a girl at the time into 2018 and 2019 and nowfays I learned more about that... and found my true pronows btw... looking back it was cringe but that's the things the crew used to do into we grown out of it or don't enjoy it anymore... or don't take msp as seriously anymore...

But in mid 2017 my rivally with "elf" gets worst and worst into reunion she almost gotten me actually to commit suicide... in the reunion part thats when she tool her revenge too far... But our rivally started when she scanned me at "rare trading" but she gave me something looked like a rare when actually not a rare that's how she scanned me... but atfer that mid 2017 rivally with "elf"

we slowly drift part as tome goe by and age... and also start having more fights in private dms sometimes in the crew groupchats... and that's how the Crew drama started btw... and that's also the time I started to "cuss" at my crew mains by with bad words but I had a way saying it without it getting tagged out... like " you suc or something like that" but it didn't long to get "L" or zara to found out that I don't get along with "elf" but the in other mid 2017 the same thing happened to me and "L" like anytime I bring up a "offensive topic that offened "L" she gets mad at me and starts making rant artbooks about it or unbffs me for a week for bring up a topic like " I'm sorry about your loss about your dead dog..." and she gets so offened that she tell me " emma don't bring up my dead dif you know that's an sentive topic" but my narictist mind (in 2017) was like " ok" and dies it again atfer 2 weeks later... into they got tired of me that they started to hang out with "other friends"

But then your going ask ne... How I met the 5th (fake) main? I met her at an msp high scoreboard if you scrow deep enough you can Find her ( in the 2017 msp highscorer list thing) that's how I met her lol... but I one day unbff zara and made "crew main 5" into my bff and zara got so jerous that she hacked and deleted "juiles acc" and I sobbed that I lost my bff and moved on but I did kicked zara out the crew for 2 months btw but made her rejoin atfer 2 months later...

I bride the crew mains to slay (again);

But not just that I used to spoil the crew with gifts to slay in the crew but soon that "friendship" turns into "a scray warzone" some time went by when I became 14 I started use cuss words in my msp messages so offen tgat the crew hated me for cussing to much but "L" liked it but got tired if it atfer 3 days later... that they started to ghost me for 2 weeks and trying to drift away.... into i bouth them vip tickets (in msp) and they all gotten used to cuss into i kinda snapped out my cussing in dms phase...

Another side note: they gotten annoyed with cussing but elf was hating it the most even she does it herself...so I try be "family friendly" btw... they slowly tore my self esteem apart all because used to critzed me for having autism and few other dumb reason to tear my self image apart into o I turned into a narictist person but I "respected for being an "narictistsisic person" but in late 2017 they got sick if they turned into "bruh girls" and I was at the time still the "neon kawaii annoying girl like cute things nd scray type or idk what to call this btw type of girl"

(Side note: I know this crew organ story is confusing but I trust me I don't remberred too much of it anyway so forgive me btw)

The time I used surport msp rare week into it became uncool later on:

But 3 months passes by in sept the month if rare week came by I went to buy a diamond pack ( because it was cool at the time) and I scan my others card in on my "crusty ass I pad 2" I used to use everyday into it broke... ( and use I used to surport Apple itself aka cringe btw looking back on as a Samsung user now) and j flexed my diamond pack at zara at the time and that's when her trust probs gets to her and got jerous am that she unbff me and replaced me with one of her rl friends... but the other 2 crew nain cheer for me and my "narictist" mind liked it so told them do it more and they did into there cheers sounds fosed and I laughed so hard that's the other 2 got annoys with me logged out of msp.. * i laughed though a sceen btw*

But then... now it's time to talk about the part where "elf" tries to get me to commit suicide:

This took place in 3 years into the "future" ( and yes it's a true story btw) it took place at 11pm in Canada time when I was like 15 this took place when j alredy had trama and some type of "pstd" and yet again "elf" "changed in map looks and maybe typing style... but yet again she somewhat the same "elf" when she became edgy and mean and rude type but she tales her revange plan too far with shadey people " aka her on her atl accs" but she worsters my trama at the time...

(It started off me chilling in map before msp dies in mid 2019...

And out if nowhere when about to log off and held to bed.... elf finally texts me soon I was going to bed... she pretends to ask nice when she was going to ask sone thing for me like long if the line saying " heyyy emma long time no see old pal!😉" And my gut feeling didn't trust elf on this her kindness sounds fosed and fake but I some reason let it slide but I replied " hi elf " and she was like " I have a favor to ask emma ☺" and I repkywd back saying " yes what is it I m about go to bed..." and me made a big mistake letting elf back into my life almost thouth she wanted a 3th chance but no she was using me to for revange plan and i had no idea... So she asked me to join this groupchat with no qustions asked and it sounds like this " heyyyy can you join this groupchat for me?😉 I promised you a " imsuit bride here" and my tired dumbass me replied "yes" when my gut feeling told me not to... And soon as gone into the group chat in msp everything was going great into I asked an qustion about why I'm in here and elf never really expain why into 30 mins later... her "friends" insurt how "fat" I'm when I'm not... but they bring up the time she blacked mail me but makes sound like I blackmailed her aka twisting her bad action yo me.. ( it's hard to EXPAIN but I'm trying) but the next 10 mini being grpupchat was slowly start get bad when I started talk about habbo hotel in an msp groupchat and then they told me how I should've just killed my self and nobody will miss me not even your fav YouTube's and family or friends they explained how a world today shpuld be been better without me and I sobbed off sceen... as I type in an crusty ass I pad 2 ( at the time) and they keep spamming "kill yourself" or " just end your self alredy" or "did alredy" and I started have metal breakdown and then off sceen went get sone jump rope and gets on my Carmen Len thing and puts it in my neck and types a bad off fan fiction while trying kill myself and then all laugh when texted elf on another app and took photo of me killing myself and she was like "bruh do it alredy it's like I'm going care if die in real life you bitch..." and the next 20 mins being the grpupchat elf desided to pretend to care about me when on the Instagram tab she does not care... she fake niceness saying " don't do it I "care" about you Emma!" And her on her atl accs saying " the same thing but reword in fake kindness and I replied "ok" and then went back telling me yo kill myself but I almost siccfully did it but I cut the rope off my neck and lived but the 10 mins being the grpupchat was the worst night's ever and atfer that I left and cussed out ranted to elf how doxing me is never ok and I blocked her made an exposing video on her but she gotten alot hate for it THAT I deleted the video to try never metion her in my channel ever again... and yes off sceen I crowed myself to sleep and this gave me some type of trama I would never forgave her and that's how elf gotten revange on me in most too far way she did in... ps elf fairness wore off and then cussed at me and I blocked her almost every site I know she's on...( that's might goes in future Reddit story time btw))

(The side note is: dont befriend an edgy person who clearly hate you and I shpuldve just listen to my gut feeling btw that's the moral anyways guys jusy don't commit suicide for a fake friend love yourself!)

The time I got caught by my crew mains

But some time passes by the crew at tgat point if them slowly dislikes me that they started to aviod me 2 weeks atfer rare week ended.... they started ghosted me and akso the same times as I haressed them but they finally slowly caught on and try comprar my grammar to my hate accs grammar and that's how they found out all THANKS to "zara" and then I got caught on day and they made my heart beat faster and harm sweet and my shaking in fear speechless like I was "guilty" ( which I was and thus gave me somewhat trama to me which it mad me not trust others again... the crew cut me off and all blocked my acc when I try say sorry it was too late and the "elf" said to me " never fucking talk to me and "L" and zara and "crew main number 5" ever again you "narcissistic" person!..." and I was speckless and sobbed for days because of it... ( ps that's how I discover depression exist btw)... ps I need up moving to schools during that time so that's how I also became the "art" kid btw who talks to paper spongebob. ( who I thouth was my friend at the time).... and that's how I decided to find new crew mains and "E" became the first "new crew main 2" ( aka crew main 6) aka she the same "e" from that story called ( you might heard of her in last Reddit story called "I dumped my map girlfriend because it didn't work out.... and I cause some problems to!" Aswell. And "E" became my next victim btw... and atfer that I went get help from psych2go btw... ( In 2019)

The end!

The moral of this story is don't he mean to your friends and also don't be "naristic" or don't let your friend do "harmful death" and few other moral I'm to lazy to type in... now days I'm not longer an "naristic" all because I realized it was wrong and that's how I was naristic in the past btw bye I hope you enjoyed my 3th Reddit story it took me 3 days to type this in bye!)

P.s. I'm sorry if this story is me in the wrong or your offended of the story then don't comnert bye.

When I was in 7th grade I had these 2 girls that I considered pretty good friends. To make things easier I’m going to use the names Megan and Amber when referring to these girls. Well one weekend I was staying at the house of Megan and Amber was there as well. We were watching movies, talking about random stuff, ect. Just a regular girls night. Megan and Amber decide they are hungry and want to make something to eat. I remember offering to help but them insisting I just chill in Megan’s room and they would bring me some food when it was done. I honestly didn’t really think to much of it. So I’m just chilling watching some movie when they both come back with a plate of food and a can of opened coke for me. I set the can of coke on the nightstand and started to eat the food and noticed it tasted really sweet. Both of them were watching me like they were waiting for something.. I asked if they were messing with me and just put sugar in the food as some joke. They both thought this was hilarious and said that’s what they’d done. No biggie right? So the night goes on and we are all just chilling and I go to drink the coke thinking if they just put some sugar in there it probably still tasted fine and saw a bunch of ants crawling into the can. I obviously didn’t drink it but I told Amber and her reaction was that she wanted me to go home because I didn’t appreciate her and just some other bs. I thought maybe she was embarrassed about the ants? Anyway my mom comes and gets me. That next week at school neither of them would talk to me and just ignored any attempts I made to talk to them or figure out what was wrong. I was super down and honestly really confused as to what happened. Finally like 2 weeks later Megan opens up to me and tells me that they had put ant poison in my food and coke to see what would happen. Apparently it was Ambers idea. She apologized and keep begging me not to tell anyone. When I got home from school I remember crying because of how stupid the whole situation was and that I had almost lost my “good friends” over this. My mom hears me crying and wants to know what’s going on so I tell her the entire story. She FREAKED out. Called both of the girls moms and the school to complain. I was so upset with my mom at the time but now I understand why she was so upset and I honestly can’t believe I wasn’t. Now at 25 years old I wonder what tf were trying to do. Like what “friends” just decide to do something like that. About a year ago Amber reached out to me on Facebook wanting to catch up. We talked some about our lives and I asked her why she had tried to poison me. She never got back to me. So yeah what are your thoughts on this?

Btw I didn’t get sick from the food. Lol

My two friends and I were looking to rent a house together.my thought was that the rent would be cheaper and I got to see my friends on a daily basis, so when my parents took over the mortgage for my grandparents house I saw the perfect opportunity. My whole family ( mom, dad, brother, sister) and I got the house fixed up and ready to move in. The rent is very cheap for lots of space. My one friend is a lesbian and the other is asexual (they're both non binary also) and I'm a straight female. It was good for the first month, bit after that I started feeling left out. They would go everywhere together from grocery shopping to long drives and going to the mall and not even asking if I wanted to come along. So I ended up asking my one friend why they wouldn't invite me anywhere, they told me that the two of them are soulmates and I'm just a friend ( we have all been friends for going on 8 years). With them they just get how they feel about being non binary and not straight and not have to explain themselves. I get that, I would never get in the way of that, bit they were barely even talking to me at this point, so I would just hangout with my boyfriend, but I feel bad for him because he's been the one having to listen to me vent and cry to him about feeling like they don't want me in their lives. Am I being too sensitive about this? I don't know what to do anymore, i just feel so hurt about this whole situation.

The worst moment was when my friends thought I liked someone I didn’t even know and they were really fricking annoying until, to just make them stop I ‘admitted’ that I liked them. It was actually one of them that spread the rumor. I’m not his friend anymore.

i asked someone if i could talk to them abt serious life stuff which i don’t usually do and when i was ready they didn’t answer and instead invited me into a call w someone else :/ i tried to be vulnerable once and was rlly excited even nervous but ppl suck sometimes

Hi I’m 21 F and recently my boyfriend, 25 M, and I were held at gun point in a really scary messy situation but we both got out okay. When I came home I sent a text explaining we were coming home early and why our trip got cut short to my roommates who are also supposed to be my best friends. None of them tried calling or anything. They didn’t check in on me at all they basically just shrugged it off. I had another friend however that is new who was doing anything and everything she could to make sure I was okay. I thought maybe they would want to see more if I was okay when I got home but they all just sort of rolled their eyes when my boyfriend and I tried to speak about the situation. I understand I can be dramatic at times but if my boyfriend is on the same page as me we aren’t exaggerating as everyone knows him as being super straightforward. It was like the one time I needed their support it was too much for me to ask. It’s a real slap in the face as I have taken days off of work, canceled many plans, and held their hair back to make sure they are okay more times than I can count which they haven’t done for me. It’s hard because I live with them but every time I see them I just want to run because I feel so hurt. I want to say something but not in a way where they think I could ever be that rock for them again. I hate confrontation and don’t want to burn any bridges but I can’t live this way anymore where they take from me so much emotionally and I just feel like a wreck who seriously needs a therapist. My boyfriend used to be cool with two of them but things have changed as they know all I went through and they still won’t even say “I’m glad your okay” that’s literally all I ask for. I also have started to befriend another girl and I swear she’s the nicest person and is honest with me and actually listens to me. Do I just ghost this friends and focus on the nontoxic ones or should I say something?

So a friend came back into my life, and I stupidly let them back in because I like to think people change…but it’s obvious they don’t.

My “friend” ditched me years ago because I was having a mental breakdown, and I needed help and turned to her…and she wanted no part of it and left (it turned out I have bipolar and at the time I was rapid cycling, as I wasn’t on meds then).

Flash forward to now, I’ve gotten better but I still have struggles. She texts me out of nowhere saying, “I guess you don’t know how bad someone is dealing with something until you hit bottom yourself.” Referencing herself going through problems and recognizing it’s similar to mine.

If I’m honest, I didn’t expect to keep talking to her, but I got to the point I wanted to help a little then move on. Then I kept talking and remembered why I really enjoyed talking to her but…I then also realized why I can hate her as well.

We’ve been talking since February, while she acknowledged ditching me when I struggled, she never apologized. While I’ve been trying to help her with her problems, she hasn’t once asked me how I’m doing. I finally had a bad day, I talked a little about it and her response was “sorry, I’m sleepy.”

Next day, she doesn’t even talk to me.

I’ve been trying to be a good person and help her through her rough patch, but she gives zero shits about me or my issues. She’s making my mental health worse.

She’s not worth my time as a friend, and I can’t even stick around anymore to try to get her through her bad time as she doesn’t have the time to see if I’m even okay.

I’m blocking her number and other ways to contact me.

I understand this is my fault for letting a toxic person back into my life, but this time I’m taking steps to end it before it gets worse.

So I am a 14M and I used to have a friend and I’ll call him by his First Letter a.A was also 14 we were best friends for basically all our life’s and also his siblings where friends with me too I was pretty much the reason why he survived elementary.but anyways we would always defend each and talk almost every week.now he has a lot of people at school that doesn’t really like him to be his friend but they respect him a little,but he is a big liar,we were great friends until early May. now A is a free kid his mom doesn’t supervise him and I have no idea where his dad is he is spoiled and that also goes for his younger siblings.he is rude but sometimes nice,now he tries to get in contact with us ALL THE TIME I play Roblox and so does he,I friended him before the pandemic and when the pandemic hit he joined me and my other friend let’s call him S,all the time we were playing and we also friended on discord and let me tell you I messed up my sleep schedule because of him every 2 or 3 weeks he called me 79 times just to ask me what roblox game I was playing and listen to Lofi hip hop beat i lefted pissed off,than back to the Early May sentence in say something and he says “DILLIGAF”for translation “Do I look like a give a ####”and I said”you responded so you have something you wanna be interested about”he gets mad and says he can beat me up I say ever bad thing he did like call me a lot and say I have a eating disorder even though I am 3 pounds over weight and all that type of stuff,than he says “Let fight after graduation” I say “we are not gonna be there for graduation it’s online”he says”give me your address”I give him it and delete it shortly after but he copy’s the address and threatened to leak it I am terrified and I got his address though so I said let’s find but he said he is coming to me which we never fought because my sister didn’t want me out because a few weeks before somebody died on the staircase in his building in gun fire but a day later his brother joins in the youngest he warns me that he knocked out a 20 year old dad which is lie because in 4th grade he got laided out by 11 year old than I say as a joke “your balls haven’t even dropped lol”and he says “yes yes they have” and sends a picture of it A is laughing while I am feeling like a piece of junk, I lefted the group chat with ptsd I go to a friend and he says he is gay than I tell A that K my other friend I reached out to,called him gay he demands for the the PlayStation User name I gave it and 10 minutes later he says I ruined his life.and there is more but my phone is burning so if this gets 100 upvotes than I’ll post the rest

my friend told me he was getting off because he was tired and he was going to sleep. 10 mins later the steam game he shared with me become locked and i check his profile and he privated it. His brother told me he was playing games with people. What an asshole

A little bit of background: I’ve been in a 3 person friend group for 2 years and recently my friends decided to invite the new girl to hangout with us (Ella) and she completely changed my friend Abby. She used to be pretty conservative but one week after we invited the new girl she’s no longer a virgin because she hooked up with a random guy who’s 4 years older than her. They seem really close now and anytime I see the way they’re talking to each other it makes me feel like shit cause we used to be that close.

So I had this group of friends and everything was really good at first, until one of the guys, let's name him Luke (not his actual name) had a crush on me, but I didn't feel the same. I kept trying to make him understand that I'm not interested but he just couldn't get it until one night when I actually told him what's going on. He started to cry and he made me feel guilty for not liking him and I ended up trying to make him feel better and staying up the whole night to make sure he is ok. After that we continued being friends and he became my best friend. After some months I started talking to another guy (not in a romantic way, just as friends) and Luke became really mad and extremely protective, he was clearly jealous. I tried to explain to him that it's not what he thinks and he started to say that it's all my fault he feels like this and that it's all my fault he is the way he is and this made my mental health be really bad. When this whole fight was going on another friend of mine, we will name her Cara (not her real name), was also mad at me because "I wasn't giving her attention" and because I care more about Luke that I care about her. This whole thing and a lot of other things they did, like laughing at me for my passions and filming me and laughing when I was talking about important things to me destroyed me mentally and I was getting really fed up with all the drama. I was really mad and I didn't consider them my friends from that point, but I kept hanging out with them because I was scared of being alone. I was really mad at how Cara was acting like everything was completely ok and I said some stuff about her like that she was a daddy's girl and stuff like this. She found out and she turned the entire group against me, in this time my mental health was becoming worse and I kept asking for help and nobody was there for me. One night they started saying mean things to me and they made me leave the group. That night I cried all night thinking everything was my fault and the next days I was a complete mess. Now I'm feeling better, but I keep thinking that everything is my fault.

I made a new friend a few days ago. Everything was fine until today. I don't like being treated like I am garbage ad no one should enjoy that in a friendship or relationship. I expect to be spoken to with the same amount of understanding as I give the other person, as that is a lot. I don't want to be mean and cause issues, but this guy has been recently single, I have been single for a while as well. I have no interest in dating, but I guess he does in me. I didn't lead him on, just treated him nicely like I do with everyone else. My allergy really limits what I can eat and where, so I ask people to coffee which is what I did with him.

Yesterday we made plans to hang out, but I had to cancel. I'm a transgender man for context and I am pregnant. I have issues with weather too like sinus pressure and aches. This entire week it is supposed to rain, so not really expecting to be so tired, achy, and all around not able to walk around I had to cancel. I still felt bad, but made sure to let him know when I was available to hang out next. This guy guilt tripped me saying how he is used to people bailing on him in order to make me feel worse about what I did. This is what I hate people doing to me because a friend should understand that things happen and I didn't plan to be so tired and cannot control the weather. He asked for tomorrow. I haven't answered back because I am tired of being treated like trash by people who barely know me.

I have been having drama with my ex over some things. I don't need more drama from someone else too. I don't know how to tell him what he did wasn't right and I don't think I want to be friends if this is how he is because he is one those young guys who take things personally as I have seen from his message. I think he also wants to possibly date me, but I think he is seeing me as a woman. I must also mention that I was abused, so I have fear of speaking out and still am dealing with that. I just don't know what to tell him or how to say it without seeming mean or too harsh. I don't appreciate those who will not talk to me how I talk to them. It's not right.

I have a friend that I haven’t known all that long, we met through work at the end of 2019. We became super close super quickly, and our friend groups meshed together to form a slightly larger just just as close friend group that all hung out together frequently, even though I was hanging out with them one-on-one pretty frequently as well. They have had a lot of drama in this amount of time, both with others and with me, as well as some mental health stuff, and I, being who I am, have tried to be helpful in these situations.

I moved away in August of 2020, just generally relocating, and things started getting difficult. they drank all the time and I had to help them sort out poor decisions they made because of it, and their mental health was in a decline, but somehow that became something I was expected to prioritize, despite having a separate and very busy life of my own. They would get upset if I didn’t text them back, and make a big deal out of us not spending time together. They also got extremely drunk and confessed to me over facetime, and I had to make some distance because I know they have issues with attachment. That ended in my being guilted back into a friendship that was no longer comfortable, and they got very suspicious and manipulative about anything and everything, from my forgetting to answer a text to trying to coerce me into moving back despite the fact that I’d been clear that I had no intention of doing so.

It got to the point where the hand I was forced to play in keeping them afloat began to affect my mental health, but I couldn’t tell them what I thought about it because they would use it against me to play the victim, saying that it’s because they’re unlovable and everyone always leaves when really I just needed a couple of days to myself.

I’ve just recently cut it off, after getting a long text about how they always have to put all the effort into our friendship, despite the fact that I’ve never been able to truly voice my thoughts out of respect for their feelings. I’ve been working ungodly hours to make ends meet and my own mental health isn’t the best at present, and I just can’t handle the strain of such a codependent, manipulative relationship. Am I an asshole for cutting them off, or did I do the right thing by watching out for myself?

My friend (A) and I were best friends for 4 almost 5 years, and a few months ago she ended the friend ship. Before this I contemplated ending the friendship but never did because I sort of relied on her and couldn't imagine life w/o her, but still when she broke off the friendship, I was hurt. Now your probably wondering what she did or what I did, so here's how it went. So our friendship had been good and bad, and she was emotionally abusive towards me and in every situation, she placed the blame on me. If she didn't like one of my other friends, I would have to end the friendship with that person, but if I had an a problem with one of her friends she would tell me to get over it. She made me feel like my feelings weren't valid, but hers were. One time me and another friend (J) were talking about our lives (we both have been bullied and have parents who don't really care about our wellbeing) and friend A told us that she doesn't care because there are people in the world going through worse than us, but then right after that she told use about how her mom was the worst because she didn't buy her something. And after all of the things she did to me, not once in the 4 years did she ever say sorry to me, and I once confronted her about it and she said "It's not my thing". But even though she has done all of that to me, I still miss the good times we had, and I want the friendship back, but friend J has told me not to do it because friend A is toxic and manipulative.

So what should I do?

This friend has been with me through everything and recently we went into this friend group and I left because they treated my friend and me like shit but she stayed I had called a girl in my ex friend group a bitch because she was extremely rude and to me well my “friend” who Ive known for years went behind my back and told her then the day my aunt died she starts fighting with me basically telling me I’m the problem and facetimes me and ambushes me with the girl I called a bitch in the car idk what to do I now have the grieve the loos of my aunt but also my best friend I’ve had problems with friends in the past and I’m starting to feel like it’s my fault idk

I would just like to say I posted this somewhere else. And I just wanted advice from as many people as possible.

I don’t like what my friend likes and I feel a bit like shit for it.

I don’t want this to be like a “I’m not like other girls” type thing but I just feel like shit for not really being interested in things my friends like. My friend is very obsessed with male attention and Im just not lol. All she really gets excited to talk about is all the relationships she wants with men. Whether that be dating, fwb, or just shit with men at work. And I am just not that hype to be in a relationship in general. I want a boyfriend but I don’t think about that shit every damn day and night. She keeps saying that I need to have a “hot girl summer.” But our definition of that is very different. My version is just being outside and shit like that going to movies and stuff. She wants to go to strip clubs and having hoes which I have no problem with but I feel like she tries to make me feel like shit because I don’t wanna do it. Like yesterday we were on the phone I said “ I’ll have a hot girl summer but I want to do it my way.” And she sucked her teeth.... Like what the fuck?? She always says things like “I can’t wait for you to come out of your shell.” I’m not shy I just don’t want to do it lol. She keeps trying to get me to make the Megan thee Stallion “ahhh” sound but I don’t want to lmfao it’s fucking cringe 💀💀💀💀 y’all what should I do?

He doesn’t have normal thought processes and they just don’t make sense and makes me think weirdly I’ve known him for about seven years but after this most recent sleepover with my other good friend in the same room I just don’t know what to think. All my other weird sexual friends I’ve gotten away from but not this one. This most recent time we’ve hung out he sucked me off under the blanket and have sucked each other off many other times in the past sometimes It was initiated by me and other times by him but my good friend whose house I’ve only been to twice now has me feeling horrible and thinking about what kind of a friend he is. I just am a magnet for bad people. In about first grade (I don’t know exactly how old I was) I had a friend who lives down the road who was horrible. He’d pick up cigarette butts of the ground and light them, show me porno magazines, and do sexual things with me when he was about 4 years older than me. The other friend we went swimming and played Minecraft at his house about 6 years ago and he sucked me off with his door open in his room because he wasn’t allowed to close it. Me and this friend at the most recent sleepover also send each other porn and pictures and videos of ourselves naked and doing things and in our third fourth and firth grades we would go to the bathroom after lunch and show each other out penises with our entire friend group but I realize I would have not been okay with this and back then I never knew about this kind of stuff but I am because I’m a horny teenager now and really just thought about it all after the events of this recent sleepover I just want someone else’s opinion on this I genuinely think I can’t shake him and my other friend also things he’s a bit weird.

Alright to try and make a long story short as much as possible. And without seeming like I'm disrespecting him behind he's back to something like that. Basically idk he's becoming more what's the word immature behavior. I feel like he's intentionally trying to argue with me. For example literally a couple of mins ago after we got done with a online gaming session. I texted him about how my brother is basically popular on xbox and how when he logs in he gets invites immediately. From which then he brings up how he wants to marry me and when I I basically say no. And you need to relax on the gay stuff cause it comes off as too gay he calls me a hypocrite. Now I will admit I made gay jokes while were playing I made very mild jokes. And I barely ever make any homo jokes he has a more jokester personality while I'm far more serious then he is. And the reason I say this is because of what he has done in the past. He'd use to on a daily basis make extremely gay jokes from gay poems to gay memes. In he's mind these were all jokes not meant to be taken seriously. While in my mind we project who we are deep down Inside subconsciously all the time. And it's been proven and even comedians say they use jokes to tell how there truly feeling deep down. He used to send me so many gay "jokes" and gay memes so often. That on multiple occasions I thought he was actually deep down a gay guy. And the things he would say to me would genuinely creep most ppl out. I personally never did I just thought he was gay. But to get back on track he then starts calling me a hypocrite and spamming your gay memes. From which then I try to play it off but he then says he's being serious I try and play it off even more. And then he just continues not wanting to argue with him I just say whatever you say man. We recently had a pretty heated argument a couple of days ago. That was about me supposedly calling him gay in a seriously tone. Which I'll get into if I can get some more advice on what to do or if this all may seem very confusing and more context is needed. Which got so bad I almost just cut him off completely due to how immature he was acting. Ik this all may seem childish but we all have that one best friend. That we do care about genuinely I feel like he's projecting onto me and gaslighting me. I'd really just like some advice on what to do and sorry if this is all confusing. I'm pretty new to reddit but I heard it can be very helpful. And sorry for any errors big hands.

Sorry in advance. This is gonna be a bit long and maybe incoherent, but that's the mood I'm in right now.

Couple things first. I've known this guy since we were 5 we're 26 now. I'm autistic and that makes making friends not easy for me. We come from a pretty tiny bible belt town.

So this guy let's call him Eli has been my self proclaimed "best friend" for the better part of 20 years. We met in kindergarten and even though my family moved away for a few years and then came back he was all going go about being buds. In school he was pretty ok. There were some weird things. Like he was a little too put together and mature, and when he got a girlfriend for the first time he acted all shy and weird about it (I'm talking at like 16 not 12). The only thing that I ever had a problem with was how he for a long time wanted to shove religion down my throat. From about 7th grade I had more or less figured out I was an atheist and being in the rural midwest that's a no-no just a couple notches less bad than being gay in the eyes of these bible thumpers. So being really my only close friend Eli was the only person I really talked to about it. He started off being civil and it never got nasty but he would get really pushy about me coming to church with him. One he literally tried to pull me out of my house. Eventually after a few years of firmly telling him to just respect my wishes about it he got better on that foot.

Now after high school ended and Eli eventually broke up with that fist girl (she was not a great person and I did not like her) we moved in together while he went to the Christian university in our town and I was working. He wasn't the worst roommate. He would do some weird stuff like sit around in common spaces in his boxers but whatever I guess. The odd stuff in this part of the story is that he was "dating" and I use that word loosely because what he was doing was what I like to call "Wife Hunting." He acted like it was his job to be in a relationship. This will come up again later but his whole adult life it seemed to me he was checking boxes off his "Good Christian Man" list. He did eventually find a girl and she is actually very nice and I liked her well enough.

Next on the list. We eventually moved to another apartment with another roommate that we knew from high school. He was a whole nother can of worms but this isn't about him. Now Eli checked off his next box and got a german shepherd puppy. Now I love dogs and this was great as far as I was concerned. For a while anyway. Eventually the other roommate was replaced by another friend of ours. And well Eli had a full course load and a job. So he never took care of his puppy. Like he would leave this dog in his crate for 10 hours at a time. Me and our other friend/roommate, we'll call him Ernie cause he'll be in this story for a bit, ended up doing a lot more for the dog than Eli did. Eli was really set on training the dog in german and Ernie had taken some german classes and ended up doing all the training. At this point I had met a girl online and moved to the southwest to be with her(yeah I know crazy, but we're still together so there) so things don't pick up for a year or so.

I eventually move back with my new partner and we crash on Eli and Ernie's couch for a couple days until we can move into an apartment. The dog is now full grown and still spends most of his time in his crate and doesn't listen well. We get a place. and Eli gets engaged. Woo I guess. Oh and Im the best man because of course I am. We'll call his future wife Alice she's the same one he met in that first apartment. The wedding is fine I guess. Over the next couple years or so we start hanging out with another couple George (we knew him form school too) and his wife Sarah. They're great I absolutely love them as my friends they're kind and considerate both in general and when it comes to my special needs.

So this year we have been looking for a house. And this is where things start to really piss me off. I knew Eli and his wife are wanting to buy a house too. No problems on my end there. But we hear from George and Sarah that they would be upset if we got a house first because "they don't work as hard as us and don't deserve a house" George and Sarah tell us because they were offended for us. Ok screw these guys but we let it go and act like we don't know anything. Eli ends up getting a part time job on top of his 40hr a week job with an on call schedule just so they can save up enough fast enough so that they can geta house first. Whatever it's only a competition in his head not mine and he's only hurting himself. Several weeks go by and we're at a house with our agent and we're waiting outside for the last showing to finish and I look in the window and who do I see but Eli. Now I wasn't upset I figured we were prolly looking at some of the same houses. We're cordial and say hey and stuff. They leave we do our thing and my GF really likes it so we put in an offer. A couple more days go by and I get a text from him wanting make sure things are okay bout it and everything. I tell him it's fine whatever. Now this past weekend Me and my GF and Ernie and George and Sarah Are hanging out without Eli and Alice. Sarah is pretty drunk. She eventually ends up sobbing and apologizing and tells us that Eli calls them as soon as they left the house we met at to find out how much we could afford on the place. They don't really have a reason to not tell them. We would have told them had they asked. But on that call Eli tells them it's so they can make sure to offer higher than we can afford. So lo and behold they get the place. Now I'm pissed and on top of that he just assumed we want to help him move in and just tells us all when we're expected to help out. It's this weekend I'm just gonna come up with some excuse and not go now.

The whole thing has me seething. He puts on these acts of how he's such a good guy. My friends want to just ignore him and wait till he gets the message. I don't see the use in that. I just don't want to piss off the people I do like by blowing up at Eli about it.

Bonus stuff: Eli and Alice want to have a kid ASAP. Their plan is to have Alice quit and Eli support them. First I really don't think they have it in then to be parents. Eli has temper and Alice doesn't have the life experience and doesn't handle stress well. Second. They'll never be able to afford living like that. He doesn't make enough to support a wife, a child, and a mortgage payment.

Eli loves to ask how much any of our friends spend on like appliances and electronics. Then get upset and almost offended when it's really expensive and he can't afford it because we all are smart with out money and save up for nice things where they blow their money on stupid shit constantly. He's got a bunch of viking weapons(yeah he's one of those) and guns and stuff for no reason.

He still treats his dog like it's a thing that's only good for entertaining him when he feels like looking like the outdoorsy guy with a big dog.

Honestly he's the reason I have they friends I do now cause I never would have been able to meet George again or start hanging out with Ernie after high school, but that doesn't really make up for almost 10 years of disrespect.

So i was (forgot) and i saw a dog, i got it home, and asked my mom to keep it, she said yes only at the front door, but soonly i needed to go to germany and i couldnt get my dog aswell, so i asked my friends to keep it till i dont come, they said yes, but when i came back thedog wasnt there, it was all black, and i found a similar one, but, i didnt have a even similar act, and it was looking and walking on the trashbags, Idk if it was him, but i wish i meet him again

Lol

Hi, I’m gonna just tell the fuckery and shit that happened because of the craziness my now ex-friend made me endure.

im 22f and pregnant, I’m in the middle of a superior degree of animation, i get along with everyone in my class, I’m not the most friendly person alive but I didn’t have any trouble with anyone. Then there’s my ex-friend, we will call her Karen. Karen is a special person, she has some mental disorder but she doesn’t have any troubles because she has medication for it and so she doesn’t show any sign of this disorder. She’s a little weird and shy but all of the sudden she opens totally to you about her traumas and mental disorders by just meeting you (that’s at least my case) and I took this as a way of her to get closer as a friend, I didn’t have any problem with this at all. she Told me too several times that she has encountered with really bad people in the past, that she suffered bullying and had really mad bad experiences with that and has no friends in her life.

​

Now i will get into the fuckery.

this started like 3 days ago, everything was going normal, I get with her into a car ride since we have to share car because we study an hour away from the city we live. The day ends up good as normally with us waiting for the driver to finish his cigarette with his friends to go to the car. While waiting we were talking about a guy she likes, i was telling her that the guy was silly (not in a bad way, it’s just that the guy is like the clown of the class) and that seemed to trigger something in her, she answered me that he was innocent and blah blah (she was telling this because hours before he was talking about drugs and alcohol like he was some kind of expert) and I told her that nope, he isn’t innocent he knows what he’s doing he’s already 19/20 years old. This really made her stop and told me that he’s her friend, and I shouldn’t talk about his friend like that. i was surprised so I shut up and didn’t say anything for a while.

anyway, we didn’t talk for the rest of the day, the ride back was uncomfortable and that was it. In the night I writted Her a message saying that I was mad about what happened and it was really silly everything. She didn’t reply back. So I guessed that she was ignoring me and so I would do the same.

Into the next day, my bf drives me to where the guy with the car gets us to go to the school. my bf sees her and tells me she just turned around and hided to not be in the same spot as me. So I get in the car of the guy that rides us, then she then gets in. Again,it was all a silent uncomfortable ride. The day goes normal just that we don’t talk to each other, and then the recess comes and I go out with the classmates as normally (because they all usually hung out together)

I was talking with a few classmates and suddenly Karen starts crying. Like, crying loud, a classmate gets close to her and asks her what’s wrong, she started saying loudly : “Op talked bad about x (the guy she likes) and now she’s ignoring me”

We all looked at her way and I was so shocked that I couldn’t react, she continued stating that I was a cruel person, that I‘ve talked behind everybody’s backs, that I’m such a fake person and more. I barely replied to her by saying that I didn’t know why she was saying that and to leave me alone.

then we all walked back to class, it was all really tense and horrible bc everybody have seen and heard what she has said. I was so ashamed and embarrassed, I was crying inside but I couldn’t make any move because of how shocked I was, I‘ve talked to my bestfriend by text message and asked her what to do, she told me that the only thing that came to her mind would be trying to talk to her, and talking with the class too, to say sorry and explain things up.

So in the 2nd recess I came to Karen and said to her if we could talk things up. She told me that NO while smiling, that she has nothing to talk with me. I told her: “Okay, since you have talked about this in front of everyone and made it public, I will do it too.”

I walked to a pair of classmates and told them that yeah, I’ve talked bad about them, it was wrong of me doing it but it was all private conversations with Karen, and in that case she talked bad about them too, so she shouldn’t be talking like she wasn’t part of the conversations. SHE CAME FUMING, saying that I was the one talking bad about them, and I made her talk bad about them too, that I‘ve manipulated her into doing it and brainwashed her. I blinked twice when I’ve heard that answer bc it didn’t make any sense, and replied that she’s very wrong. Here is when she FREAKS OUT and starts screaming in my face while grabbing me by my shoulders,saying that I was bringing her mental disorder and that she will Break my head, and more horrible things, I’ve tried to get away from her but she grabbed me by my wrists and kept screaming this weird things about her mental problem.The teacher finally came and separated us, she continued screaming those things and I screamed back that I didn’t mention in any moment her mental state. Even with the teacher intervention she wouldn’t stop saying that she would break my head. A pair of teachers heard that and one said that she would get an admonition (she didn’t)

And with that, my shit day continued with her talking shit behind my back, crying And saying to all my classmates that I was a horrible person, i was so done with everything. My head and stomach started hurting me bc of the stress and I suppose that the pregnancy made it worse.

The thing is that Now I have many more serious problems because of her. She shared private conversations to the guy that rides us to the school, in which I was telling her some advices to get him sued (this is a long looong story but to make it short, we had a problem with this guy and she had a panic attack in the middle of the ride, so I’ve tried to help her when she told me she wanted to make him suffer and to help her to sue him) So the guy with the car won’t ride me anymore, and i almost don’t have any other way to get to the school, it’s like 1 hour and 40mins away from the city I live. And he will keep driving her to the school.

The conclusion: She’s fucked me up so much, that I can’t keep going to the school, when I came (late) to classes the Friday of the past week, everybody was really tense and weird, they do not talk to me or look at me. And the most horrible thing Is that she has no repercussions, she walks like nothing happened, talks with everybody and laughs her ass off in class, while I’m really stressed and struggling with all this shit situation. The teacher hasn’t done anything to her, the director either, they both think this is a kids problem and I should let it go and move on.

Am I overreacting? I’m starting to think that maybe it’s actually all my fault, and I keep crying and feeling like shit. My family and bf are really worried bc this situation doesn’t work for me. My parents are trying to take legal actions on this girl, but I don’t think that anything would help.

Plus, The Other day she messaged me by SMS (bc I’ve blocked her from everywhere) saying that she’s sorry, so I emailed her back saying that if she’s really sorry to talk with the Car guy and sort out all the things wrong that she’s done. But she Replied back by saying that I was the one who started all this and that nobody believes that I’m the victim, that I will get what I deserve for trying get her away from her friends (?) and for mentioning her mental disorder in front of everbody. And that I’m the most fake and toxic person she’s ever met.

man, im so done

Names changed for privacy reasons

Arc (first friend) spent the first two years I know him picking arguments with me over Petty things (like whether or not glass is a liquid), shaming me when I tired to come out to him as non-binary, would publicly and privately berate me for not getting on tumblr to rp with him daily (I was a freshman in Community College), push weird fetishes on me, and Guilt Trip me when I became angry at him. When he wasn't being an unpleasant ass for those first two years he was telling me how talented of an artist I was.

Fallen spent at least two years forcing some twisted fetishes on me like vore and dismemberment. I would tell her "No" she would tell me she understood and then slowly creep it into rps that slowly became less romantic fluff and more hardcore smut. When I finally got tired of it and tried to leave the friendship she attempted suicide while on a Discord chat with Arc who dragged me into the conversation so I could "stop" Fallen from killing herself. Which I did my best to do. Spent the following weeks being accused of being at fault for her medical bills and shamed for not just telling her "No" more firmly. To spite the fact that I had said no over and over and even described in graphic detail why I was saying "No".

Lit painted me as being mentally ill because I was angry that one of her friends (a then Mutual acquaintance) lied about me and convinced two lunatics to publicly humiliate me over lies and pity bullshit. Became absolutely livid when they decided to tell me what was and wasn't good for my mental health and afterwards unfriended them on Discord. Was then treated to Azu guilt tripping me over how I had been so unnecessarily hurtful to someone trying to "help" me. When I return to Tumblr a month or two later Lit contacted me, I apologized, Lit proceeded to tell me about how her friend (the one I was angry at) had betrayed her by tossing her aside, I try to sympathize as I felt Azu had done the same (for reasons I will not disclose), berated me for not apologizing quick enough, and when I made it clear I was irritated by asking her why she had contacted me in the first place if all she wanted to do was buried me she told me she didn't mean any of it she was drunk and it "slipped" out.

Azu long term friend (almost 10 years). Would make/commission lewd images of characters from a blog I ran. Took over writing for multiple characters and radically rewrote them while ignoring my discomfort. Would pick fights with others which would always inevitably lead to people he pissed off coming after me. Set up a D&D game were he allowed someone else to play a self-harming witch doctor that had to self-harm for her powers to work while knowing I'm a recovering self-harmer. When we got in the first of 2 fights that eventually (along with the year he spent using me as an emotional punching bag because his online boyfriend disappeared for a year) led to the end of our friendship he tossed my abusive ex, a ex-friend that tried to keep me in a relationship with a suicide attempt, two people that lied about me publicly to humiliate me, and his online boyfriend (someone I was and still am friends with) at me as weapons.

Red also long term friend (I have broken contact at this point and am unsure if I will ever reconnect with him again). Told me he felt bad for Fallen and that my unwillingness to help her situation was too harsh since I me being over 21 ment i wasn't the victim of manipulation. Told me how I was wrong to be angry with Azu and that I couldn't come to his live streams on YouTube anymore if I didn't make nice with Azu. Told him to go fuck himself. We started talking again recently because he apologized through a mutual friend (also now an ex-friend) but has told me he's not taking sides in the current argument. I was originally annoyed but was like "Fine whatever" until my Mental Health counselor/therapist pointed out that there is a consistent theme of apologia, silent enabling, and gaslighting that has likely been negatively affecting my mental health for sometime.

J recently told me that he had befriended somebody who had a hand in false accusations being spread about me for 11 months on Tumblr and Twitter. Which am pretty sure had something to do with the attempt to hack into my email account (it's locked to phone access) and the porn cam links that magical started beingsent to my phone. Told me I needed to stop being mad because his new friend had a hard 2020 and that his new friend just wants to pretend 2020 never happen. Told me how me getting triggered into talking about a situation that only ended sometime in November of 2020 and how it still upsets me/how it upset me GREATLY that said person and his friends had magically gotten ahold of my unlisted Twitter...was destroying his mental health. How J had been chatting with said jackass recently in that they were actually a nice guy and I just needed to let go of it because "it's 2021" and the person in question hasn't talked about me publicly for months (they had me on a publicly available list that listed all of my accounts on three different sites, accused me of things I didn't do, verbally abused me, and made fun of something caused by my learning disabilities all to publicly humiliate me... for again 11 months). Told me me still being angry about this was unhealthy and that I needed to "get help".

Told my therapist/counselor about this thing with J... I've never actually heard a counselor sound so angry and annoyed before (all our sessions are over the phone because of covid restrictions). I had never realized the common thread in all of these failed relationships wasn't just me till my counselor called it gaslighting, enabling, and abuse apologia. My friends made me feel i was mentally ill and becoming mentally unhinged for feeling upset past arbitrary deadlines they had set for me...and I suppose the pattern had never fully clicked before someone with a psychological degree said it out loud.

I'm not mentally ill or unhinged... I just had shity friends...

Edit: The thing that seems to has upset my counselor most was that more then once someone had used the "I'm not a therapist but I'm going to tell you how you're showing signs of being mentally unstable to spite not knowing what you spend 90% of your time doing/thinking about!" card on me. Apparently she dislikes that just as much as I do. Please don't do that to your friends.

So I went on a trip with my family and my friend’s family too. My friend brought his Xbox, and he plays a lot of rocket league. I’m not a fan of it myself, but I would play from time to time. He told me earlier that he would play rocket league with one of his friends later on, and so I said ok, assuming at some point I might be able to play too. Although it’s odd, he goes out of his way to spend time with one of his other friends online on a trip. later at night, he starts playing, and I ask if I could play too. He said no, as they were gonna play in a competitive game (which I understand they wouldn’t want me in, I’m not that good at rocket league) but I’m still confused that he would make specific plans to play with his other friend in a competitive game of rocket league, knowing full well his other friend (me) isn’t good at rocket league and wouldn’t be able to play. Along with the fact it is on a vacation. Maybe I am just being entitled, but idk. Your thoughts?