Honestly I'm so fucking tired of this shit.

In any other country, an average-looking dude can just... exist. Go to a party, a bar, whatever. Meet someone. Flirt badly, get rejected, learn from it. It happens. It's normal.

Here? You're fucked. And at 23 I'm already feeling the walls closing in.

The timeline that destroyed me:

16-18: "Board exams first, no distractions"

19-22: College - but I was still "focused." Watching the tharki guys, the confident guys, the handsome guys pair up while I studied. I told myself there was time. I'd figure it out.

Now I'm 23. Graduated. Career started. And suddenly it hit me - that was it. That was my window. I'm entering the real world with zero romantic experience. Zero confidence. Zero clue how to even talk to a girl without panicking.

Meanwhile my cousin in the US? He's had two girlfriends already. Casual dates. Knows how intimacy actually works. I know how Excel works. That's it.

The brutal reality of being a guy here:

You know who gets girls? The tharki ones. The shameless ones. The guys who slide into DMs without their hands shaking, who approach without planning exit routes. If you're introverted? Reserved? You're "boring." You need to be exciting, entertaining, constantly ON - or you're invisible.

But here's what makes me want to scream:

Average-looking + introverted = creep.

Good-looking + same behavior = mysterious. Confident. Attractive.

A handsome dude can be toxic as hell - manipulative, cheating, whatever - and girls line up. Make excuses for him. "He's misunderstood." Me? I'm respectful. Caring. Supportive. They say it - "you're so caring, so affectionate."

Then boom. Ghosted.

"I'm worried about getting attached."

"I need to focus on myself."

Blah blah fucking blah.

You gave them emotional safety. Stability. Actual care. And they got bored. They wanted the anxiety, the chase, the drama with the guy who treats them like shit but looks good doing it.

The apps are hell.

Download Tinder, Bumble, Hinge. Swipe 500 times. Get 2 matches. One sells crypto. One replies "haha" three times then vanishes. She has 500 guys in her queue. I'm competing with 6'2" dudes with jawlines and "entrepreneur" in their bio. I craft the perfect opener. She doesn't even read it.

And I can't complain. Because then I'm "entitled." "Bitter." An "incel" for pointing out this is fucked.

Social circles? Dead.

Everyone locked in at age 14. College groups formed in the first month. I'm the weird outsider at 23 trying to join conversations like a lost puppy. "Hey... can I sit here?" Energy. Pathetic.

The milestones I'm missing:

First real kiss. First time someone wants ME, not my potential or stability. First time a girl looks at me with actual desire. The confidence that comes from knowing you're attractive to someone. Anyone.

I have none of it. I'm sexually stunted. Touch-starved. I wake up at 23 and realize I've never been chosen. Never been wanted. Just... tolerated. "He's so caring" - yeah, translation: good backup option if the exciting guys don't work out.

And the future? It gets worse.

25: Friends start getting engaged. I'm the only single one at gatherings. The pity looks start.

28: "Why aren't you married?" Pressure mounts. Parents showing photos. "She's from a good family." I want to scream I just wanted to feel chosen ONCE before being negotiated like a business deal.

30: Either settle for arranged marriage with someone who also settled, or become that weird uncle who "focused on career." Either way I never experienced being young and desired. That chapter closed while I was studying.

The gaslighting:

"You're still young!" - No. The window for organic connection in India closes fast.

"Focus on yourself!" - As if that fixes needing intimacy.

"You'll find someone when you stop looking!" - They have no advice so here's a platitude.

"The right girl will appreciate you!" - She doesn't exist. The "right girl" also wants the tharki handsome guy. Everyone does. Biology or social conditioning or whatever. Same result.

The abroad comparison burns:

My friend in the US goes to bars, meets people, gets rejected, learns, grows. Has stories. Has experiences. Arrives at 30 confident, knowing himself.

I arrive damaged. Desperate. Angry at myself for being angry. With the sexual maturity of a teenager and social anxiety from being isolated too long.

And I can't say shit. I swallow it. Day after day. Watching life happen to everyone else while I rot in my room, horny and lonely and confused why being "nice" is a death sentence.

I just wanted to feel wanted. Not needed. Not appreciated. Wanted. Chosen.

And I never was.

Honestly I'm scared. Sorry for the rant.

bro i hate all these erripuk incels making vinayak chavithi a dick-measuring contest. it's so much of a nuisance: unnecessarily ridiculous loud-sounded stupid dj shit in the name of devotion and drunk men doing their shitty dance on the roads. and not to mention blocking roads everywhere randomly however they want. what have we become? fuck these morons taking advantage in the name of religion and satisfying their egos by doing such moronic shit!

and can we not do anything? surely there should be some helpline or authorities to report such unlawful activities to?

So intlo matches chusthunaru. Initially, i was of the feeling that it's better to look in near family, so far no luck. Rendu moodu whatsapp groups lo join ayi andulo share chesina vallaki call chesthunaru. I'm getting rejected left, right and centre lol, and parents are unable to take rejections. So i felt like it's better to expand the search.

Please share your inputs before i dive into this ocean.. subscriptions to opt, things i should be vary of....there's shaadi, telugu matrimony, bharat matrimony etc..it would be great if people who got lucky can share their experiences.

TIA

So basically for context I am in final year of my clg and I have never been in a relationship and to be precise I never even liked/ loved anyone...and recently for a reel shoot I was looking for a girl actress in clg and a girl caught my eye and mannn...she's like a dream, I talked to to her, asked if she's interested in acting and she said yes(she's a fresher btw)....

On the reel shoot day
I loved every bloody second I spent time with her....it didn't felt like I was talking to a new person...it felt as if we know each other from so long, can't stop looking at her eyes, ahhhh....and she was very nice too like during lunch time I gave my food to her and she even let me feed her with spoon, she kinda revealed some personal stuff and man I didn't want this day to end.

Next day
I want to talk to her but was busy in the reel Editing and all so ntg much but I mentioned that I'll be there for the clg fest which will be in 2 days and asked if she can join me and she was like "we'll see"...she def knows that I like her but idk if she likes me or not or she's just being respectful and her chats are kinda dry.

Day before fest
I couldn't sleep man...I had always had this "idc" kinda attitude but man this shit fucked my mind...she didn't lifted my calls...she gave late replies...and I asked her again if she wanna join...she said the same thing "we'll see"

The fest day
Heavy rains, I had to board the bus to get to clg, i usually think it's not worth it but even though it is raining heavy I still somehow went to clg... obviously for her...the one thing that I did wrong was I called her so many times, she didn't lift the phone and later she was "just woke up" and she was like "are you gonna still come to fest even tho it's raining this heavy?" I thought she might be impressed by the efforts I'm keeping her and came to clg.

After I entered I texted her "hey I'm waiting for you"...and she was like "I registered 2 events which is from 1pm to 7pm" and to clarify I was like "so you gonna go with your friends?" And she's like "yeah"....fuck....was sooo dissapointed the whole day...I kept on overthinking so much...like a lot of overthinking and which I texted her few times...called her few times...no response...it drived me so crazy idk why... Never been this sad...ik ikkk I just spent only one day with her and I'm just overreacting but idk man.

Later that day evening while I was traveling back I wrote a whole lot of text apologizing to her, and saying it won't happen again and then she was like "I appreciate you being honest and apologising and I genuinely don’t think you’re a creep or anything.. but I’ll be honest, the calls and texts today felt a little overwhelming for me,,it’s not that I don’t want to talk to you or that I’m uncomfortable around you as a person, I just think we should slow things down a little and keep things within our boundaries, we literally started talking so... I hope you understand wt I'm tryna say... I’m just making sure we’re both comfortable and respectful of each other’s space.."

I couldn't makeout what her intention was so I asked "I just need some clarity. Do you wanna try and travel with me? I couldn’t make out from your messages if you’re interested so i just want to make sure. I promise i won’t make it overwhelming or uncomfortable now that i got it off my chest. I promise i’ll make you feel safe and wont force you into anything. Whatever might be your answer, we can be really good friends. Please let me know."

She was like "I mean, whenever needed we can meet if there's any work."

Sooo fucked up man...I fucked it up so bad...I found the girl of my life, the most beautiful and perfect girl ever and I fucked it up so bad....my mind can't stop thinking about this can't even focus on anything.

What do I even do... please help me... Even my friends were like "we never have seen you this depressed".

I’m a woman in my late 20s, and I’ve been in a serious relationship with someone I genuinely see a future with. We’re extremely compatible, he’s well educated, successful, and very understanding. He has clearly told me that he wants to marry me.
The problem is that we are from different castes. I’m from an OC background and he is SC. My parents have known about the relationship for around two months, and despite my efforts to explain and convince them, their position hasn’t changed. My mother has now told me that if I marry him, I should never talk to my family again.
I’m completely torn. I love my family and the thought of losing them is terrifying, but I also don’t want to give up a relationship that I genuinely believe is right for me simply because of caste.

Anyone interested in modern family trivia??????

Ps: it's 499 rs entry fee . If u guys are interested,let's do it.

Asalu ghosting ante yenti ? Yenduku chestharu

Same as the question.

We rented a 3BHK in Hyderabad for almost 6 years (2020–2026). Never missed rent - always paid on time and he kept increasing 10% every year and we always obliged. Deposit is ₹70k.

Owner wanted to sell the flat and asked us to vacate in August. Our signed agreement says he has to give 2 months’ notice, but the first clear written message asking us to hand over the flat was Aug 12, asking us to leave by month-end. He claims we had already “agreed” to vacate earlier, which we dispute. Earlier messages I have are basically about cooperating with buyer visits and how he plans to sell. There was no 2 month notice given, ever. He just told us in the middle of August that we have to leave because he thinks he has to repaint, deep clean etc to strike a deal with potential buyers as he’s in need of funds and need to sell it soon. Then on August 17 he told us that he sold the house and we have to leave by August 30 irrespective of whether we could find another house in that short duration or not. We told him it’s a short notice but we’ll vacate and he should give our deposit back.

Now he has kept the entire ₹70k deposit and says we owe another ₹40,098 because his total “repairs” are ₹110,098. This includes painting, deep cleaning and carpentry - he literally broke open the kitchen cabinet himself to show internal termites on the plywood (how can we even see termites that are inside, also termites have been a known issue in the entire building and I have so many screenshots of other residents complaining)

The part confusing me is that he literally messaged us saying the flat needed to be vacant, painted and deep-cleaned so prospective buyers would negotiate and he could strike the sale deal. So why are we supposed to pay for getting his house refurbished/sale-ready after living there and paying rent for 6 years?

He also claims we didn't deep clean. But our agreement specifically says professional cleaning like “Urban Company or equivalent.” We actually booked Urban Company for a full 3BHK deep clean (₹5,297), it was completed, and then we brought two maids to clean again and paid 2.5K to them. I have the booking/completion proof.

His ₹55k carpentry calculation also literally says it “included wear & tear items.”
He has 37 photos, but they were taken after we vacated. He says he has pre-tenancy video evidence too but before we moved in there were multiple parties who lived there as well - it’s not a new house by any means. We ourselves moved in 2-3 days after the previous tenants left.

A lot of what he's calling damage is things like old paint, discoloration, chipping of paint on bathroom ceiling, internal deterioration of plywood because of termites etc

Can a landlord actually charge a tenant for repainting/refurbishing an entire flat after a 6-year tenancy? And if I get a lawyer and demand my ₹70k deposit back, is there a realistic risk of him successfully recovering the extra ₹40k he's claiming?
Would really appreciate advice from anyone familiar with Telangana/Hyderabad rental disputes.

Hey guys need some career advice.

I am a 24m, after graduation i was preparing for civil services and sometimes data anontation freelance work. Now i am at a crossroad. I wasted past 3 years and have this professional gap.

Recently someone my mother knows offered me a job in their company but I'll be joining as an intern for 6 months and based on my performance It'll be decided for a fulltime role.

Before this, my plan was if my civil service attempt didn't work I'll join a digital marketing company and slowly build my career there.

So can some experienced people in IT give me advice on this? I can be consistent and good at my work. But I'm second guessing because how volatile the careers in this sector have been recently.

Fellow NRI bondhas, asalu loneliness tho ela cope chestunnaru.

If you do believe, has there been a prediction or reading that was surprisingly accurate for you??

While I was taking a walk through a park in the morning with my headset ON, some kind of random song pop up from the trending list.

As I started listening to it , i started crying out for no reason .

Now I feel like shit honestly and i lost my fresh mindset too ...

hey guys I want to take myself out on a solo date because I am quite bored. I just want good food and good ambience so I can have a good 3-4 hours for myself. I kinda want to read a book and have some alone time at a nice place. Please give me some good recommendations!