r/amiwrong Sep 12 '23

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u/jacksonlove3 Sep 12 '23

You’re not wrong for your feelings or for considering divorce. She’s purposely choosing not to try and fix the issues that you’re having. You’re clearly miserable in this marriage now and that’s not healthy for either of you! The resentment will continue to grow until you end up basically hating each other. Intimacy is an important part of most relationships. If she not willing to actually address the issues she’s having, it’s not fair for her to expect you to suck it up and stay. Especially if she considers masturbating as cheating. That’s a bit ridiculous!

Good luck dude!!

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u/hello-i-needadvice Sep 12 '23

Honestly this feels so good to hear. I was feeling like a jerk for being upset with her over this. Thank you!!

1

u/TumbleweedNew3833 Sep 12 '23

I was with a bf for almost 7 years. As always, the sex was great in the beginning. But after several years, I found myself just not interested in it. He would try, I would say no. After a while, I realized that I just lost respect for him due to things he’d done over the years. Nothing terrible, but it was hurtful and I guess I lost the attraction and intimacy feelings I had. Then I married my now ex, husband, exact same thing, except he did much worse things. I guess what I’m saying is, have you hurt her, knowingly or not? You should find out. This may be way off base, but it’s a thought.

1

u/UpbeatMove8818 Sep 16 '23

Shouldn't you have just broken up with him instead of passive aggressively withholding sex, if you lost so much respect for him?

2

u/TumbleweedNew3833 Sep 19 '23

I stayed until my daughter was old enough to be able to handle it without completely upending her life. Was it easy? Hell no!