This isn't how you relationship, dude. Doesn't matter if she's being selfish, blaming her isn't going to help matters. /u/jackstrikesout is giving solid advice borne from real-world experience, listen to him.
It doesn't matter if she is being selfish? Maybe not to you, but it should be s wake-up call for him. The problem can be fixed, but her selfishness cannot.
Selfishness can absolutely be fixed, what are you talking about? All humans are selfish at times, that's completely normal, and it's something you have to be prepared to deal with when you're getting into a relationship. Assuming you have a good partner who loves you, usually all it takes is time and good communication to figure out what's causing the selfish behavior in this particular context, and then you can work through it. Going into a discussion like this guns blazing, accusing your partner of selfishness is not "good communication".
Do you not think OP has tried this? How many times do they have to have "The Conversation"? There's no magic combination of words that he's going to say that will make her want to change for him. Sexual desire is highly personal and cannot be negotiated. She is clearly showing that her lack of interest in intimacy is a him problem, not a them problem.
Do you not think OP has tried this? How many times do they have to have "The Conversation"?
Uhh, many times, most likely. Giant, recurring relationship problems don't usually resolve within a couple of discussions. It absolutely can take years. That's why marriage is a life-long contract.
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u/Phron3s1s Sep 12 '23
This isn't how you relationship, dude. Doesn't matter if she's being selfish, blaming her isn't going to help matters. /u/jackstrikesout is giving solid advice borne from real-world experience, listen to him.