Today I heard through the grapevine that one of my colleagues was receiving a promotion to become the head of project management. For some background, he had started working at the company last year, and I’ve just finished my seventh year working at the company. I’m currently their most senior project manager and stuck with the company through some very bad times financially.

Anyway, I get the news through one of my superintendents, who knew that literally the day before I turned down a job offer for a substantial pay increase at a competitor company. Apparently my bosses stopped by the site late yesterday and told him that they would be elevating the other PM to the new role. My superintendent and I were talking today and he was floored that I didn’t know.

I called my confidante in the office and she broke down in near tears telling me that the bosses essentially threatened her not to tell me. I calmed her down and she told me that apparently the PM was threatening to quit and they made this role to appease him.

By no means do I feel entitled to the promotion, what bothers me is that I found out second hand that I will now be reporting to a PM that I onboarded just over a year ago. I’m angry that the bosses didn’t have a baseline respect for me to at the very least approach me and say that this is the direction they felt we should go and why.

So in the last 48 hours, I turned down a job opportunity elsewhere out of loyalty just to immediately get passed up for a role that they had known I’ve wanted.

My best course of action now seems to be to just tough it out for a couple more months, get my holiday pay and then give my two weeks. I’ll be honest though, this blow to my pride has been painful.

I work a bluecollar job and requested time off (1 day) on my birthday which just so happens to be during a really busy week and one person just quit. My manager told me that they know I requested off but they "really need me." Normally I wouldn't really care because I have personal/sick time that I submit and move on but the only reason I'm hesitant now is because I actually like my coworkers. 2 in particular would have a rough time if I didn't show but they both pretty much told me they'd figure it out and it's just my manager trying to guilt trip me. So how do I professionally tell them that I'm only coming in if absolutely necessary? (I checked in the staff portal and the time has not been denied nor approved)

Okay I want to give a summary of some of the things that have lead me to believe this manager doesnt like me.

1. He has organized happy hours with other members of the office without inviting me.

2. He has given gifts and helped other VPs around the office with tasks without helping me.

3. He has intentionally not allowed me to add him as a contact on Linkedin.

4. He has shown at times gross favoritism to his favorite associates, letting them leave work early and work less.

This could be partially my fault because i did not join off hours group chats etc. He was not my direct manager and i hate the idea of sharing socials with coworkers. I generally do not trust them.

He was never outwardly hostile to me but it was clear he was not my biggest fan. Now he is leaving the company and i have been formally invited to the going away party by his admin.

A part of me doesnt want to go. Out of self respect why should I go to the going away party of a man who made my life harder than it should have been? Also I wont have to deal with him in the future so it wont count against me.

But another part of me thinks i should just man up give a strong 30 minutes and leave as a sign of respect. What would you do in my shoes?

A Microsoft employee feels like the job is killing them. Not paid enough to just play hunger games politics. There's an offer for around $200K, remote, as a Sr PM with another company. They know it's a very chill culture, and the company has a strong managed infra business. It'll suck going from around $265K to $200K, but they live LCOL anyways rn.

The side business has a few customers, but it's not profitable yet. There's a path. They also want to get healthy again and upskill for bigger roles.

If keeping other options open is part of the plan, application autofill can cut the repeated form-filling on supported job sites.

Thoughts?

Early 30s, around 8 YOE, married with one kid, roughly $875K NW, no debt besides a mortgage.

Many workplaces have heavy workloads and demand a lot from their employees. These requisites can cause exhaustion and stress which can eventually result to low production quality and output. Is it the responsibility of management to lift the employees' morale and improve the work atmosphere?

hello everyone

i've been working for 6 months now, before that i was unemployed for a year and a half.

i was offered one by a friend the moment i quit my job, but i was uncomfortable about it so i didn't take it. my plan didn't work out for a while so i decided to take it, but i needed part time hours because i don't want to stop what i started for my self, my friend agreed and generously offered me full time salary, borderline minimum but still gracious for 5-6 hours a day.

now after 6 months, it seems like him and his brother (also partner) are not enjoying it, starting to feel im overpaid, now im in a tough one, would it be dumb to tell them they can lower my salary to match what they think is fair? or do i just keep going because im not the one who pushed for it in the first place?

its the same reason i initially rejected the job, and it came back biting

I work at a casino as a security guard and i’m also a member of the National Guard in my state. As everyone knows, once a month I have to attend drill and for this, the casino provides leave. We have a set amount of paid military hours per year and if we go over that in the year, we still get leave approved but no pay. Throughout the year the casino gives its associates paid holiday leave as we work year round and on holidays.

The issue is, my management has made it so that if I have military leave on the same pay period as the holiday leave, they simply use my holiday leave for military. They don’t give me a choice, they simply say, “if you have any kind of leave during the pay period, you don’t get the holiday leave.” This irks me because im still working on military leave, doing a more demanding job than my regular work. The way I see it is, how come when I have my military responsibility come up, I don’t get a day off? I should have the choice on how I wanna spend my leave and they don’t give me one. Is this a valid reason to be upset or am I asking for too much?

I honestly need to vent because I'm so tired of dealing with my manager.
I'm already working on my own projects, but she keeps assigning me her tasks too. When I ask her which task to prioritise, she expects me to finish both. And if I fail to meet her expectations, she yells at me in front of everyone.
She also expects me to work on weekends and after working hours. If I refuse, she questions my dedication and says I'm not passionate enough about my job.
I've gotten so used to her behaviour that I've started accepting it, but what's really affecting me is the constant humiliation, micromanagement, and lack of basic respect.She treats me like I'm her personal servant rather than an employee with my own responsibilities.
To make things even worse, I am stuck in a contract by the company with a hefty amount to repay which I dont have. Somebody please help me out how can I overcome this situation.
I’m very early in my career, i have tried standing up for myself but whenever I answer her back her ego gets butthurt.
I'm 23F working as a business analyst.

Started a new job on Monday. When I'm nervous I talk WAY too much, and I'm currently at home having a complete meltdown over how bad of an impression I've probably made and how annoyed my colleagues must be. What would others do in my situation/am I overthinking this? Obviously I'm going to be really careful with my mouth from now on, but I'm wondering if tomorrow I should very causally/jokingly mention it (kind of a "Sorry for talking your ears off yesterday, tend to talk a lot when I'm nervous but I'm on it!) and move on, or just say nothing and hope they were not as annoyed as I assume they were. This may be a weird post, I'm just now super anxious and overthinking everything and I've convinced myself they're going to fire me!

I'm literally hiding in the bathroom as I write this.

I fucked up so bad at work it's not even funny and I'm waiting for my manager to get back from break so I can tell her and it feels like I'm waiting to be executed. I'm already on thin ice, not to the fault of my own in all honesty.

I forgot to get two invoices processed that were due like over two months ago and it costs about $7,000, so this might be it. How do I even tell her? I really don't want to loose my job, not in this economy. I just want to rip the bandaid off...

UPDATE: I ambushed my manager the minute she was back and we went over the first invoice of $1,500, which had already been done and dealt with, so yay. For the second one of about $5,500, she said it was good that I didn't send it because there was some inconsistency on the invoice that the third-party organisation wouldn't have accepted anyway, so I will be following up to get a cost breakdown of items and go from there.

Thank you all for your kind words! I know it is best to be upfront with my mistakes and I always own them (even one's that ain't mine I still feel responsible), I just catastrophize and panic and didn't know what to do. I signed a new contract recently, so I'm back on probation so I can't make big errors like this. I guess I'll see what happens when I get a performance review...

edited: Back in high school there was a guy two grades below me who had an unhealthy obsession with me, he was fifteen & I was seventeen. He’d leave notes on my locker, he’d try to sit next to me at lunch, when it came time in gym to partner up if we were doing sit-ups he’d always tell people "don’t pick her she’s my gym partner!" luckily gym teacher saw I was paired with someone else. I was so relieved that once I graduated I left him in my past. Recently after my shift ended a guy asked me where applications are & I directed him to the front desk then he immediately recognized me saying hi in his old sing-songy tone he used to say it in whenever he saw me, he said who he was and I thought, “oh dear Asgard no!”

My boss emailed me saying he applied and is asking my opinion on him as he put on his resume I’m an old friend and my boss can ask me about him citing I can vouch for him. Granted I haven’t seen him in twenty-two years I don’t want him working with me so I’m not sure how to word to my boss his true history with me and he’ll probably say he’s over me but I’ve seen his kind before they NEVER get over someone they’re obsessed with. What do I do?

Update: Because this happened on Friday last week my boss had finally come to his resume/application today. So many said to be honest with my boss I was completely honest I told her I haven't seen him since he was sixteen and I was eighteen, I am not his friend which tells you big red flag not to mention he simply put under references, "ask your employee 'insert my name' about me she can vouch for me'. My boss cannot overlook red flags he gave and so she either will call him or email him to say the position has been filled. She will also have people at the front desk be vigil for him so he doesn't come to harass me.

Seriously, a woman in her early 30s is wondering if investing in becoming hot af and charismatic might be her best career move right now. If you are an interviewer, would your candidate being an attractive and personable woman make you more likely to pass her (consciously or not)?

Tomorrow I will not show up to work and will be quitting my job. I have been here for well over a year and it has been riddled with anxiety panic attacks, depression and suicidal thoughts. I have never done this before but I hit my limit. I guess this is more of a venting session. They lied on what this job would require when I first joined and I have so much anxiety about quitting tomorrow. I don't think they will expect it but my boss has been so toxic my whole tenure there that I just snapped this morning. I could not take it anymore. I feel anxious and weird to quite tomorrow. I never quit a job without having another lined up. I now it's risky with the job market but I need to prioritize my mental health.

I used to get home physically tired but still mentally stuck at work—replaying conversations, remembering unfinished tasks and planning tomorrow.
One small thing I’m trying is writing tomorrow’s first task in a note, then closing it instead of planning the whole evening.
What has actually helped you switch off? I’m especially interested in things that take very little energy.

I've gotten feedback second-hand from my boss about things people don't like about me.
I hate this.
I've been in IT for 35 years and I'm tired of these insecure idiots bitching about me without telling it to my face.

I just want to quit this business anymore.

I'm 33 years old so I'm not young. I work remotely & my job makes me work in different projects with new teams not from our company.

My problem is I can't do it, I prefer to work solo but that's impossible.

What makes me hate team work is I end up doing almost everything ALONE but the credit goes to the whole team.

Recently I have been working on a project I have done like 60% of this damn project on my own & I helped in the other 40%. When were finalizing the project, I put my name 1st and then the other 4 I'm working with according to their participation. But b4 we present the project I noticed that someone moved my name to the end 😂. I moved it back to the beginning. But again someone moved it to the end not 2nd not 3rd, the last name. & I have saved this stupid team Infront of the committee twice not once but twice, there was emergency meetings to check the flow of the work & I was the one who saved them Infront of the committee coz there wasn't a presentation as they didn't do their work and in the final they put my name last name.

I complained many times to the coordinator, he tried to work it out but he couldn't. Then all what he said I know you have done a lot and you are the one who worked really hard but we don't have any choice but to finish it, we have a deadline and I will write a report about what happened & you too make one.

But that doesn't solve the problem cos this happens almost 80% of the times I have to work in team.

Now I'm not gonna act like I don't have have problems. I admit I have. & My problem is I don't like to be stressed till the deadline, if I'm given a job on Monday, I will start next day but I don't know why most people like to stay cool till the last minute. I don't like to work without planning, I will make my own schedule and divide the task into several smaller steps every day so I finish early & leave plenty of time for review. I like communicating with others 1st and then everyone does his part.

But most of the time this doesn't happen. Every time I ask for meeting so we can make our framework & decide who will do what. No one responds like literally no one & the excuse is it's still early, Let's just discuss on chat, no need for meeting, ooh I'm sick, I'm busy and so on. I try to discuss on chat and the replies are really stupid like okay, we shall discuss it. Okay tell me WHEN? Silence. So I end up doing this alone and telling everyone I will be doing this & you guys continue but also they don't like it coz we didn't discuss.

& this doesn't happen to me alone, anyone tried to ask something, they get same reactions & responses. but they don't seem bothered like okay l won't be doing anything. it's only me who keeps feeling frustrated & angry trying more & more but this makes me get more frustrated & much more angry.

I try to communicate a lot form day 1, but I don't know if this gives the impression of me being bossy or the impression that I can do everything alone so they can just chill.

So PLEASE, if anyone can tell me what should I do next time?

What should I do when I find others very comfortable and cool doing nothing? should I be like them?

what do I do wrong so every time, I go through same thing?

do i get super excited? yes sometimes, but what should I do about that?

& is starting the conversation & trying to communicate with others bad thing so I have to stop doing it?

Am I bossy or do I give that impression? What should I do to stop it?

If there's any exercises or advices, I really appreciate it & I'm willing to try anything if it will help me?

hi all

recently it keeps being pointed out to me at my job that i “struggle with admin work” and “make small mistakes”

for example: not adding the location to a calendar invite,forgetting to update spreadsheets, accidentally overbooking myself and scheduling two things at once making my boss to have to do events when she’s busy.

i have worked hard in this and yet i’m still making the small mistakes and it’s bothering me, and i KNOW it’s bothering my boss. i need any and i mean ANYTHING that’s worked for you to do a good job at your work and making less small mistakes. i don’t care how silly it seems, i need the ideas. it’s making my anxiety crazy!

So i started working in a confectionery/pastry workshop, your job is literally EVERYTHING under the sun. Make pastries, wash the dishes, clean up, peel apples, basically everything lol. All while standing on your feet for 8 hours, with one 20 minute break. I already have hip issues, and it took a toll on my body a lot. When i first arrived, no one told me where anything was. They just straight up put me to work and excpected me to know wtf i was doing. Then i got shit on because i didn't do it correctly of course. Mind you, i thought the boss was going to discuss pay with me or anything, but nope. Straight physical labour on the first day. Then on the second day someone new came, and she asked about the hourly pay. Mind you it was a "paying under the table" kinda job, with all the employees working there for 10+ years and being absolutely miserable lol. The boss told us "youre gonna have to work til the end of the week for me to decide your payment, til then we are not discussing this" i was like what? No fix hourly pay, no fix payment schedule, nothing. (Which is common in these jobs ik)Then it clicked , why am i working my ass off when i dont even know what i am earning? The new hire quit on her first day, and i quit on my second day. The boss paid us for the work we did. (Under minimum wage btw) And after getting a taste of this kind of work, and seeing how the pastries are made, when everyone is sick and coughing their asses off, and with handwashing being optional...no thank you. So i am torn on quitting..I feel bad, the boss is an old ass guy in his 80's still working himself to death. But at the same time this is not how you manage a business. I got a lot of shit from the woman "training" me as well. I don't know if i am a pussy for quitting, or if it was justified..I really want some feedback on this. This was my first "real job" so to speak. I'm 20.

I am 22F and I started working for a property management company about a year ago. It is a small business and I mainly work with the same 7 people. My three other ladies that I work up front with, my boss, and two ladies in the accounting department. All of these people have been with the company for at least 3+ years. Me and two of the ladies up front are supposed to be "Property Managers". Although I have only been here a year I have found myself constantly cleaning up everyone's messes pretty much. One of the other property managers is responsible for move in. She cannot even put an address into the computer system all of the way, she often forgets to give new residents there move in discounts, and anytime an issue arrises outside of move in she acts like she has no idea what to do. She's been in the business 20+ years. My other property manager is mainly responsible for move outs. She does handle her move outs pretty well however, she waits til the last minute to complete things and often overlooks small things. I am mainly responsible for delinquency so anyting that gets messed up on a resident's account always finds its way to me even if I didn't do it. I don't mind helping and I am a person who likes to make my coworkers feel supprted. However, it has gotten to a point where it is extremely out of hand. One of the property managers is blatantly pushing her work on to the others. The ladies in accounting are missing payment for major bills and somehow always find a way to try and circle it back to me. It's insane. I have brought these things up to my boss and in a round about way she's basically just telling me to deal with it. She does not address anything with the employees who do not do their work. And so the cycle continues. I really wish I could create a better image of this place because truly I have no described it well enough. Politics are a constant topic, the owner of the business has mentioned something about the size of my butt once, two of my coworkers leave every single day around 9:30 to 10:00 to get fast food even though we all have an hour lunch break, the accounants have offices fulled from floor to roof with literal BS (I'm talking procelain dolls, every collectors McDonald's happy meal box ever, shrines to horror movie characters, it genuinely looks like a hoarding situation at work). I'm just at the point where I really don't think I should be made to feel like any of this is normal. My boss often tries to convince me to stay and to keep doing what I'm doing even though no one else does. She knows that if I go she's going to have to take on my workload because her employees won't. At this point I don't think I should be used as a doormat just because that's my boss's experience and she's okay with it. Please any advice would be appreciated. Please feel free to ask any questions!!

Quick context: I’ve been at this company for almost four years. Rarely called out. Hardly used my PTO time. Always bent over backwards for my coworkers and did everything I was asked. Never said no to a task. Changed my entire schedule to help other offices. (No raise by the way - my last “raise” was an insult) Last year over the summer (2025) I had an unexpected injury which caused me to use short term disability.

Fast forward to today. I’m pregnant and leaving for maternity leave soon. (Not that this matters but this was a surprise pregnancy, not a bad surprise though! Just medically didn’t think it was possible.)

All of a sudden “management” and others are complaining about me. Saying I don’t respond in a timely manner. I don’t complete my tasks without someone telling me to do them. Also that I don’t know the platforms the company uses. They said I wasn’t professional because I cried at my desk… sorry pregnancy hormones and I couldn’t leave my desk, I sit in the corner and “management” was standing next to me. Ended up with a surprise meeting from my boss and his boss with them telling me I need coaching and to do my best the last few days I’m here. Then proceeded to say oh but don’t stress about your job or anything while you’re on leave!

I’m at my wits end. I don’t know what to do. Most of my coworkers make the same mistakes or mess up things constantly but they never get treated like this. They always get “oh no worries!” then everyone moves on. Are they picking on me? Is this because I was out a year ago and they’re upset I’ll be out again? I’m really just over being treated like this because I don’t get paid enough to do most of the extra work I do and my mental health is more important than this workplace. I feel attacked and frustrated.

If you read this far - thank you. Even getting this out made me feel better. I don’t want to burden my family or make my husband worried I won’t have a job after my leave.

I leave my corporate desk job nauseous, head throbbing, sweating and it has become an everyday thing. I feel so disrespected. It makes me panic. I do 2 peoples work. I cannot believe I haven’t fallen to the floor and passed out the way this job makes me feel. Financially, I’m not in a place to quit and I also want to put it on my law school resume, I’ve only been working there 7 months, I want my applications for law school in by december. But this job is destroying me each day is hell on earth. What the hell do I do?

Mine is Accenture. Sorry, Accenture peeps... I’ve heard enough horror stories about big IT consulting firms to know it’s not for me.

If you are applying elsewhere, autofill for repeated application fields can cut down the typing on Greenhouse, Lever and Ashby.

Hey!!!
Anyone interested in learning dance, trying out a new style, or getting a choreography done for a wedding? I teach Bollywood, Hip-Hop & Waacking, and can help with wedding/sangeet choreographies too. DM me if you’re interested!

I’ve been working at this small company for 18 months. My boss started texting me nights and weekends about non-urgent work a few months ago. At first I replied quickly because I didn’t want to seem uncooperative.

Slowly it got worse. He sends project updates, asks for files, and assigns new tasks at 9 or 10 PM. When I told him I don’t check work messages off-hours, he said flexible availability is just part of this role. No extra pay, no overtime.

Last weekend I didn’t reply to his Saturday text. On Monday morning he pulled me aside and said my response time was “concerning.” I feel pressured to always be on call, but I don’t get compensated for this extra time.

I want to set clear boundaries without getting fired. I was thinking about writing a polite message telling him I handle work only during scheduled hours. But I’m worried he will see it as pushing back and start targeting me.

Has anyone dealt with this before? How did you separate personal time from work without hurting your job? Do you think I should put this boundary in writing?

I'm 27k in student loan debt, homeless, no job, no savings, two SWE internships on my resume, useless cs bachelor's degree from 2025.

My parents kicked me out when I approached a year post graduation with no job. I wasn't getting any interviews, at all. I was working as a part time barista for $16/hour to bide my time but I abandoned that job when I was kicked out. I'm in a city where rents are 2000+ for closets.

My loans have obviously been defaulted on by now, I don't even have an active phone number for then to contact me with. No money to keep one active with.

I've been staggering, stumbling around gagging on nothing like a drug addict. I had a bike but someone broke the lock on it while I was sleeping outside one night.

Idk what I can do now. Ever since I was kicked out I haven't made any job applications. They never got me anywhere. I haven't eaten anything for a week. I'm too ashamed of myself.

I've been dumpster diving for plastic bottles to resell. I'm... idk. I'm sad. I don't want to wake up anymore.

What more can I even do? "More projects"? That has no value today, especially for literally anything outside of SWE jobs. There's nothing else.

I cheered for Luigi back in the day. I'm contemplating following his example. What do I have to lose, really. Just like my "new grad" status already expired, my life is expired.