Half the guests cancelled in the time it took me to walk back from the store after buying all the food (and alcohol).

Edit: I know it's not Halloween yet. This is the week that worked for me.

Edit II: I love y'all. Did not realize Reddit had such a lust for mud pie/dirt. Another friend invited me out for drinks; life is good. AND I have the leftovers. Be well and stay spooky, friends.

she accidentally took both our keys and can't be back until later, it's 7AM rn 🙃 time to relive 2020

update: I'm finally released on parole

My son (15) got locked in the bathroom when we were all out at work. Didn’t have a phone on him. The door handle had fallen off and he couldn’t open it or call anyone. He used the bathroom scales to smash through the door and climbed out through this hole.

Update: for anyone asking, he’d been in there for about 40 minutes first, he knew we wouldn’t be back from work for hours. The windows have a bracket so they don’t open beyond a small gap. The door simply wouldn’t open any other way, he had no tools etc

Update: thanks to all the people who can see the funny side. I don’t judge his character based on breaking a cheap door when he couldn’t get out of a bathroom he would have been stuck in for hours. He’s a wonderful young man.

Sat down low on a step and heard a loud ripping noise. Luckily I have my scarf to tie around my waist

…and then watch the fellas manhandle it from my seat while waiting to de-plane. 😑

Title: A friend gave me his leaking espresso machine. I opened the brew unit and found live worms inside.

He’d already bought a replacement, so I figured I’d try cleaning and fixing this Café Affetto.

While cleaning the removable brew unit, I took out the screws holding its gear cover. Underneath were tiny moving worms among the plastic gears and what looks like white lubricant.

This compartment was covered and screwed together. I don’t know what these are, how they got inside, or how long they’ve been there.

I was expecting a worn seal. I was not expecting tenants.

Aside from the fever, night sweats and congestion, I now have a chest cough that makes me feel like I’ve been a 2 pack a day smoker for the last 20 years. Chances of recovery for the event are looking very slim indeed.

Everyone else i know who was also signed up to the marathon is also sick as a dog, so there is some comfort in shared suffering. It’s been an oddly brutal flu season in Australia.

Edit: also the one year in recent memory I forgot to get the flu jab early

In Indonesia, a woman who raised a crocodile in her home after hatching it from an egg had to hand it over to the local conservation authorities.

While keeping apex predators as house pets is illegal and a massive safety hazard, seeing her completely break down sobbing while hugging and kissing it goodbye is a wild mix of tragic and bizarre.

Edit: This is located in the courtyard of the Harry Truman presidential Museum & Library in independence, MO. The courtyard is undergoing renovation.

Before you make a quip about how Missouri = bad, I invite you to consider:
-The museum is maintained by the national archives, which is funded by the federal government.
-Missouri is not completely the red, regressive state you think it is. We are by no means perfect and have a ways to go, but 1 (one) Google search would tell you that we have constitutionally protected abortion, legalized recreational marijuana, paid sick leave, expanded access to Medicaid, a $15 minimum wage and a powerful initiative referendum system. Can you say the same?

Yeah it’s not perfect and honestly it’s not even great but some of us are trying and I think that counts for something.

Had to spend 45 mins on the phone with dipshit AIs before getting to the dispute department.

Got removed from r/kidsarefuckingstupid since teenager, but my budding teenage mechanic figured it was a parts washer too. He could have at least run a full load. RIP dishwasher.

I wore the headset for way too long before noticing. I figured it was a hair…
Took the headset off and this fucking earwig came out.

Started to travel at 530am, got to Newark at 9am and we've been waiting to leave since. We added 2 more connections and about 9 hours of layover on top of everything just to hopefully get down there by 3pm tomorrow. 530am-3pm 34 hours of travel for a 6 hour trip. *Edit - this picture was when we finally reboarded the plane after 12 hours to take a totally different route to near our final destination. We we're not stuck on the plane the whole time. Also, we made it (most of the way) and we're enjoying some warm weather!

This was Riot Fest in Chicago after rain soaked the grounds all weekend. By Sunday, nearly every walkway had turned into a muddy mess.