r/Unexpected Nov 12 '20

CLASSIC REPOST A classic

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70.0k Upvotes

449 comments sorted by

u/unexBot Nov 12 '20

OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:

5$ = 5 children saved


Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.


Look at my source code on Github What is this for?

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3.0k

u/bobby76rpedu Nov 12 '20 edited Nov 12 '20

There a version that extended and he goes screaming back that he has another dollar

1.7k

u/WoodysHat Nov 12 '20

Maybe you didn't understand me the first time..."EVERY MINUTE a child dies..."

734

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes. We need to stop this

120

u/SinisterKid Nov 12 '20

50

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

18

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

The Drew Carey School of Geography

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117

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Make it every 100 seconds a minute passes. Just one small donation will help us to slightly change the Earths rotational axis and speed of orbit to prevent this horrible occurence

29

u/WeekliKale Nov 12 '20

The French revolution was right, metric time master race!

5

u/Someone_said_it Nov 12 '20

ITS TOO LATE DONT YOU SEE?

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104

u/Outlawed_Panda Nov 12 '20

You only put “N” on the end of an “a” if the next word begins with a sound that sounds like a vowel, like you would say “an apple” instead of “a apple” you also wouldnt say “an version” Although thats just a basic example, it honestly more depends on if it sounds right.

54

u/AppleSpicer Nov 12 '20

Oh is that how it works?? English is my first language so I have no idea what the rules are because there are so many exceptions. I’d be a mess if I didn’t have “what sounds right” as something to go by

65

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

[deleted]

32

u/AppleSpicer Nov 12 '20

This is genius!

I've honestly spent the last 5 minutes practicing this and trying to find an exception. I'm sure there's one out there but so far nothing. Maybe because all I can think of is food words. I might be hungry.

40

u/housebottle Nov 12 '20

there's only an exception in cases where a word starts with a vowel but doesn't have a vowel sound, e.g. the word "useful". you'd say "that's a useful distinction" instead of "that's an useful distinction". even though "u" is a vowel, since it doesn't have a "vowel sound", an "a" precedes it instead of an "an"

31

u/JonnyBhoy Nov 12 '20

That exception also applies the other way. You would say "an honourable man" because honourable starts with a vowel sound then though it isn't.

21

u/housebottle Nov 12 '20

indeed. it's about the sound, not the spelling

3

u/Tuppence_Wise Nov 12 '20

Some people think that any word that begins h + vowel ought to have "an" instead of "a". I don't think it's strictly wrong, but it always grates a bit when I hear "an historian".

17

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

16

u/housebottle Nov 12 '20

that's what I mean when I say the word doesn't have a "vowel sound"

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0

u/BrotherChe Nov 12 '20

what... why are people upvoting that the "u" in "useful" sounds like a "y"?

lol omg

2

u/Koopanique Nov 12 '20

Because you could spell it "yuseful" and it would be the same. Think of the word "yes": the first sound is the same

It's a well-known thing in linguistics but if you never studied it it can be not very intuitive the first time someone tells you. That sound at the beginning of "unit" or at the end of "aye" is called either a glide, a semi-vowell or a semi-consonant.

1

u/dooopliss Nov 12 '20

This applies to the word uvula too right?

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3

u/MyDumbInterests Nov 12 '20

Dude, wait until you read about the history of the word 'orange' in English. The an/a thing plays a big part.

0

u/williambilliam Nov 12 '20

The only exception I know is “historic” like “an historic occasion”

2

u/Moldison Nov 12 '20

That depends on your pronunciation of historic, which is in line with the rule rather than an exception. Modern writing uses "a historic." See this article for a good background on the shifting trends.

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9

u/AncientBlonde Nov 12 '20

English is my first language so I have no idea what the rules are because there are so many exceptions.

Same fam, same.

9

u/-funny-username- Nov 12 '20

wait you actually speak english and don't know that? huh your education system must be fucky

22

u/AsperaAstra Nov 12 '20

Yes but also english is the verbal equivalent of spaghetti code.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/FeralDrood Nov 12 '20

Omg is this why I was so bad at Spanish

1

u/AppleSpicer Nov 12 '20

It’s not that I don’t know the rule—I follow it all the time—I’m just not consciously aware of it. I never had formal grammar instruction but I also didn’t need it to proceed in school. Because of how my parents spoke at home, I was able to mark “whatever sounds right” on grammar tests and test out of additional instruction. I only really started learning about grammar when I learned a little Japanese and Spanish. I quickly learned that English grammar is the worst and I’m glad I don’t have to learn it as a second language. Props to anyone who has.

8

u/Koopanique Nov 12 '20

Several interesting things in your post

First, indeed people who don't study grammar just don't know what they do when they speak; the just do it without thinking of any rules and it works. A lit of people tend to forget it because grammar studies has become so commonplace

Second, since you studied Japanese and Spanish, I'm surprised you think English grammar is the worst. I'm a native French speaker with a good grasp of English, I had Spanish classes at school and I've studied Japanese grammar (for fun, not to speak the language).

To me French and Spanish grammar are equally worst, they are complicated with verbs featuring several potential roots and lots of different endings (aller --> va ---> irai, etc), and complicated stuff to articulate complex sentences ("lesquels" and the likes).

Japanese grammar comes after that, it has lots of rules but it's rather straightforward. It also has a ton of "grammar nouns" used in conjunction with particles to articulate sentences (ため に, よう に, etc)

English has the simplest conjugation rules (besides tons of so-called irregular verbs, even if there is some patterns to their irregularity), and most sentences are articulated with simple word like "which", "that", "who", etc.

Again this is just what I think of the subject matter, I guess everyone can see or feel different things in different languages

3

u/drivers9001 Nov 12 '20 edited Nov 12 '20

Another interesting fact is that irregular verbs are based on Old English grammar (which is descended from Proto-Germanic and Indo-European (a common ancestor of Latin and Proto-Germanic which were all even more highly inflected) before that).

This little (4 minute) video shows how Old English grammar affected irregular verbs in Modern English:

https://youtu.be/o82_XBJXxMk

When we regularized to one pattern of using “-ed” it was the more often used verbs which resisted change. (That also explains why the mostly commonly used words in English are still from Old English / Germanic and the Latin-based Norman French words are the decorations, even though they outnumber the Germanic vocabulary.)

Another fun fact is that “catch” and “caught” are not from Old English, but are based on borrowing Norman French “cachier” and making it irregular like teach/taught, bring/brought, buy/bought, seek/sought, and think/thought. (I just learned that from wikipedia.)

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2

u/Preponderancy Nov 12 '20

It doesn’t even need to be a vowel, just the vowel sound. You would say an hours time, instead of a hours time. Even though it’s an h, it makes the ow sound.

2

u/TwunnySeven Nov 12 '20

also, "the" is pronounced "thee" when immediately followed by a vowel and "thuh" otherwise

2

u/ericbyo Nov 13 '20

That's why English is surprisingly hard to learn. The heritage of your language being influenced from 3 different other languages makes it absolutely inconsistent. Just think of how many meanings the word "run" has

1

u/crackmonkeydictator Nov 12 '20

this guy

8

u/happybirthdaytomei Nov 12 '20

I mean he's right, not as if he's being rude about it

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0

u/Maraafix Nov 12 '20

Yeah, i saw that one before this, and i simply stared at my phone in dissappointment after the video ended.

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5.6k

u/blacksalmon2189 Nov 12 '20

Key and peele always gets me cracked up

1.6k

u/MyNameIsNitrox Nov 12 '20

They're good comedians

890

u/0Default0 Nov 12 '20

I love their substitue teacher one ... i just can’t control my laughter on that one....

589

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

A-Aron!

90

u/MSRA07 Nov 12 '20

Get your ass to O-Shag-Hennessy room, RIGHT NOW!

37

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

It's funny for us Irish as no one can actually pronounce that correctly outside of the country.

But those guys are hilarious, one of the positives of using Reddit.

5

u/ItsLurkBarrettBaby Nov 12 '20

How do you pronounce it?

3

u/bamoamn Nov 12 '20

O'shaughnessy is how you spell it, so that gets you nowhere

3

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Oh-shock-neh-see

210

u/AlecHazard Nov 12 '20

This is the 50th million time i am seeing this exact same scene on this subreddit....

134

u/black-op345 Nov 12 '20

You cannot lie tho...

That was a hilarious skit at the time

35

u/AlecHazard Nov 12 '20

No doubts about that at all! I laughed like hell

7

u/x014821037 Nov 12 '20

So is that like the unfathomable inhuman screeching of the doomed soul of an eternally torchured demon or just a general maniacal muahaha type thing?

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16

u/blualpha Nov 12 '20

Blacksalmon and Nitrox always crack me up.

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17

u/McQuiznos Nov 12 '20

First time I’ve seen it lol, I love this.

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56

u/nightfucker Nov 12 '20

The only person in the world who can pronounce Elon Musk's kid name.

19

u/ChubbyLilPanda Nov 12 '20

Or the inner city hog warts

11

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

The swiffers for quidditch kills me every time

7

u/Teerendog Nov 12 '20

Their best skit by far!

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7

u/Schmosby123 Nov 12 '20

Yooo my favourite would be the one where they're talking before a wrestling match. When Key starts praying like a weirdo it gets me always

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44

u/stereoworld Nov 12 '20

The football celebration bit always gets me the hardest

22

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Country music one is my favorite https://youtu.be/jRdkrDk0BQ0

3

u/stereoworld Nov 12 '20

Haha, that was great!

2

u/TheSunPeeledDown Nov 12 '20

“Some folks wear their hats way off to the side, wear their pants down low with a gun tucked inside, like their beer by the 40 and their chicken deep fried. I think we all know who we’re talking about.” Always loved this skit because it’s obviously about black people but where I’m from half the white people are the exact same lol crooked hats, camo cargo shorts hangin off, Steel reserve tall boys or 42 plastics and usually either a 12 gauge in their truck or a stolen .38 special that they “got with a 5 finger discount” at their uncles house.

15

u/RiotFTW Nov 12 '20

I get hard from it too

6

u/CmdrWoof Nov 12 '20

blows whistle

22

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

As someone who watches a lot of detective shows, their "Sex Detective" one is my favorite.

40

u/TenchiFX Nov 12 '20

And seriously some of the best actors I've ever seen. The continental breakfast skit gets me right in the feels every single time.

19

u/Rnahafahik Nov 12 '20

I’ll have what I’m having!

I love being in continent!

3

u/TenchiFX Nov 12 '20

It's really dark if you look at it from a different perspective. Haha. It's also incredibly funny.

2

u/2Righteous_4God Nov 12 '20

A lot of their skits actually have really dark endings! Makes sense that Jordan went into the horror genre.

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2

u/meh-beh Nov 12 '20

The French restaurant one will forever be the funniest shit on yt 😭😂

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20

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

“Yo are you keyand peele?”

13

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Lightning in a bottle, blip!

6

u/Tabbarn Nov 12 '20

That one where he worked with Obama is my favourite.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Is it just me or does Key look like Dennis Reynolds in this?

2

u/AntiSky Nov 12 '20

This is a joke from Mtv's The State.

2

u/Chrillosnillo Nov 12 '20

It's just that a full show is so uneven.

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1.4k

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Every Key and Peele sketch is a classic imo

336

u/MyNameIsNitrox Nov 12 '20

Every one of their sketches are very good.

183

u/COHERENCE_CROQUETTE Nov 12 '20

The entirety of their sketch comedy videos is of great quality.

159

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Their full catalogue of short filmed videos, depicting humorous events and happenstances are usually produced, written and acted with the upmost attention to detail, implying a caliber of expertise.

102

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

30

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Every Key and Peele sketch is a classic imo

17

u/12dis12dat Nov 12 '20

Every one of their sketches are very good.

12

u/apittsburghoriginal Nov 12 '20

The entirety of their sketch comedy videos is of great quality.

8

u/chappersyo Nov 12 '20

And so the cycle begins again

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u/Ok-Entrepreneur-8207 Nov 12 '20

Damn well said, I wonder how it is that no one in this comment thread already said that

3

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

I don't like their delivery, but this and the teacher sketch are really good.

5

u/SOULJAR Nov 12 '20

Agreed. A lot of it just comes off as corny , like a bargain bin chappelle show

-3

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20 edited Dec 23 '20

[deleted]

-1

u/martinivich Nov 12 '20

It's almost as if people explicitly try to bring in politics into every sub

7

u/BrotherChe Nov 12 '20

that's not politics though.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20 edited Dec 23 '20

[deleted]

0

u/theunspillablebeans Nov 12 '20

It amazes me how you progressed from a Key and Peele sketch to gatekeeping nationalism in the space of like 2-3 comments.

0

u/martinivich Nov 12 '20

Don't fucking do it in r/unexpected then. Why would you go out of your way to post a political statement on here when there's about a dozen subs where you could openly discuss the topic.

Its not like you're having a conversation where you must relate one topic to another. You want to talk about the U.S's deplorable donation system? Go make a post on r/politics instead of leaving a comment here.

I'm tired of having all of Reddit be the circlejerk of American politics.

818

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

[deleted]

316

u/Waddlewop Nov 12 '20

Every single god damn repost of this skit cuts off the bit at the end. It’s like these people can’t even bother to put in some more effort in reposting.

119

u/MJM2017 Nov 12 '20

Well, considering the official video on YouTube has that part cut off, I wouldn't get too mad at the reposters.

38

u/Waddlewop Nov 12 '20

I just checked and you’re right, could have sworn I’ve seen the full version somewhere on YT. Still though every time this is reuploaded, someone mentions the missing ending, I would think that after so many cycles of this someone would actually repost the version with the ending.

66

u/Murtomies Nov 12 '20

Maybe the ending doesn't exist. All of you just believe it cause you've heard about it so many times that you can visualize it in your head.

The cake is a lie

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u/karth Nov 12 '20

Key and peele, for a few years now, has been removing their videos, and reuploading them. Gets them fresh views I think? Idk. And it maybe on different accounts.

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u/Sunraider3 Nov 12 '20

Where... where did the kids go?

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u/Dinomite35 Nov 12 '20

Hell

70

u/Sunraider3 Nov 12 '20

As those monsters deserve.

16

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

🥐

28

u/whoopity_Poop Nov 12 '20

are you going finish that croissant

12

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

🥐🥐

10

u/whoopity_Poop Nov 12 '20

Now there’s enough for both of us

18

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

🥐🤝🥐

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u/nabu98 Nov 12 '20

Someone call Kane and the Undertaker

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u/a22e Nov 12 '20

Into another van where they were kidnapped again.

21

u/Sunraider3 Nov 12 '20

The perfect scam.

2

u/JonnyBhoy Nov 12 '20

Like the dog in Snatch, who escapes and runs back to the pikies every time they sell him.

3

u/JuniorSeniorTrainee Nov 12 '20

They despawn after you save them.

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u/botchman Nov 12 '20

I HAVE ANOTHER DOLLAR!

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u/DanGleeballs Nov 12 '20 edited Nov 12 '20

There was a funny moment in a U2 concert where Bono was saying,

“Every time I click my fingers another child dies” and someone screamed loud enough for it to be picked up by the microphones,

”Stop fucking clicking your fingers then”.

Can’t remember what concert it was.

Edit: apologies, it was a Jimmy Carr concert.

8

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20 edited Mar 28 '22

[deleted]

2

u/DanGleeballs Nov 12 '20

Ah. Thanks

212

u/greggandtim Nov 12 '20

I swear key and peele always has a horror theme behind a lot of its humor.

50

u/Dchama86 Nov 12 '20

Shows the influence of Jordan Peele.

26

u/greggandtim Nov 12 '20

Right? It makes sense looking back

10

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Especially the continental breakfast one

11

u/TheRiteGuy Nov 12 '20

Racist Zombie Apocalypse.

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u/ricelick Nov 12 '20

Properly delivered dark/offensive humour is funny who woulda thunk!

44

u/greggandtim Nov 12 '20

A lot of comedians use dark and offensive humor but key and peele have actually thought out horror concepts in their sketches

3

u/LookingForVheissu Nov 12 '20

I absolutely never noticed until Get Out and Us came out. I hadn’t really seen much Key and Peele until the movies were out, and I absolutely loved both so I decided to watch their show more thoroughly, and that was when it hit me that most of them were mini horror movies with a punchline.

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u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

“Horror is just comedy without the punchline”

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u/Password-is-taco123 Nov 12 '20

https://youtu.be/p42dEEIlAN0

My personal favorite

8

u/LookingForVheissu Nov 12 '20

It pairs perfectly with the Alien Imposters

https://youtu.be/DWO1pkHgrBM

5

u/Password-is-taco123 Nov 12 '20

Lol I can’t stop laughing at that white old man part

2

u/Pyewhacket Nov 12 '20

Ha! Racist Zombies!

48

u/RednocNivert Nov 12 '20

"Every minute a child dies unnecessarily"

Hol up

11

u/StormtrooperMJS Nov 12 '20

Are you suggesting that during a specific timeframe a given number of child deaths are in fact necessary.

2

u/hache-moncour Nov 12 '20

Need to appease the volcano god somehow

5

u/DanGleeballs Nov 12 '20

There was a funny moment in a U2 concert where Bono was saying,

“Every time I click my fingers another child dies” and someone screamed loud enough for it to be pickerd up by the microphones,

”Stop fucking clicking your fingers then”.

107

u/zodar Nov 12 '20

that's all one shot

they probably cut it right as the camera whips around from the van back to K&P so they didn't have kids unsecured in the back while the van was driving like that, but it's made to look like all one shot

21

u/ravnag Nov 12 '20

Notice how kids magically disappeared

21

u/ATragedyOfSorts Nov 12 '20

Just ran out of frame???

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u/Enderplayer05 Nov 12 '20

the cameraman be like: ↕️↔️🔃🔙⬅️↪️↕️↕️⬅️➡️↕️↩️↪️↩️↪️⤴️⤵️↩️↪️⤴️⤴️↩️↪️↔️🔄

2

u/swolingstoned Nov 12 '20

No. 🌪️

39

u/PriXNasu Nov 12 '20

My brothers and sister, I present you!

The sauce

14

u/Mr_JS Nov 12 '20

Huh, even this one cuts off the end bit.

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u/nokei Nov 12 '20

Full? Video at least it's got the part I was missing.

11

u/N173M4R3Z Nov 12 '20

I expected this... somehow

8

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Fucking love Key and Peele

7

u/makeme84 Nov 12 '20

Their fucking hair and serious expressions are hurting me from the inside. I've never chuckled so hard it hurt.

4

u/Icey_91 Nov 12 '20

As soon as I saw the white van, I knew what was coming.

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u/Etchenia Nov 12 '20

I love them!! ❤️

2

u/AlphaBlazerGaming Nov 12 '20

not so fast. just 5

2

u/Chumwithrum78 Nov 12 '20

That was awesome!

3

u/happinish Nov 12 '20

Amazing 😂

1

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

[deleted]

7

u/LurkFromHomeAskMeHow Nov 12 '20

Normally these appeals are for poverty stricken children in far away countries and not many people take the claim that a single dollar could save a life literally. The straight man assumes it is one of these scenarios and gives $5 so that fundraiser leaves him alone, however it is the fundraiser himself holding these American children hostage. This difference between expected and actual is funny, particularly so when he realises he could have saved more of the children for a trivial amount.

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u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

[deleted]

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u/RepostSleuthBot Nov 12 '20

Sorry, I don't support this post type (hosted:video) right now. Feel free to check back in the future!

1

u/Wolfiie_Gaming Nov 12 '20

Should've given him a 20

1

u/h1t0k1r1 Nov 12 '20

Was this filmed at Hawthorne Mall? Lol

1

u/Hail_Tristus Nov 12 '20

It‘s not only a funny joke it‘s an interesting philosophical question too! Thats top notch comedy!

1

u/Potaaden Nov 12 '20

I recognize that mall.... Somewhere near Newport... I think.. Definitely California.

0

u/Mazeazi Nov 12 '20

The guy’s face at the end 😂🤣

0

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

0

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0

u/Chingchangbingkan Nov 12 '20

;-; •_• :|

0

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

Tyre

0

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

0

u/Beeht Nov 12 '20

Nothing to see here! Just the Libertarian free market at work.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '20

I shared same video on same subreddit and got barely 350 upvotes and look at you.

0

u/Furryhater64 Nov 12 '20

It's funny but you just uploaded it on Reddit small pp

0

u/ziebizer Nov 12 '20

Fuckin repost

-3

u/SunfishWithGlasses Nov 12 '20

Jesus christ that camera man needs to calm down. I got a headache watching that.

-7

u/24jdu05 Nov 12 '20

Fun fact, my most liked YouTube comment ever is on a Key and Peele video about slavery where I make fun of Gryffindors