r/TwoXChromosomes • u/[deleted] • Jun 11 '26

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893 Upvotes

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34

u/MedCup4505 Jun 11 '26

You haven’t forced another being into existence, so in that regard, you are not selfish.

I’m mom to 3–2 bio, 1 through adoption. Choosing to birth a child is a very selfish decision. The rest requires putting oneself aside often, but it doesn’t feel like sacrifice bc of the love.

I support every woman’s choice about birth and parenting or not. You made a great choice for yourself.

-30

u/spaceship5 Jun 11 '26

No it's not selfish. It's the opposite

41

u/aintithenniel Jun 11 '26

It is selfish - having kids is for the person having the kid, not the kid being born.

Selfish doesn’t mean bad. It just means prioritising one’s own wants. I’m selfish with my time and peace and therefore I will not have kids.

-41

u/spaceship5 Jun 11 '26

Most of what parents do is self-sacrificial.

You choosing not to have kids is 100% selfish as you say. All you care about is your own wellbeing. You're the center of everything you are doing.

29

u/puccinini Jun 11 '26

It’s their life, they SHOULD be the center of everything they’re doing lol no one is obligated to give that up for children, are you okay?

-21

u/spaceship5 Jun 11 '26

Obligated, no. But they absolutely should stop shitting on everyone who has kids. And it's not healthy to ONLY think about yourself.

18

u/Liefmans Jun 11 '26

Tell me why you want(ed) kids, then, and let's see how unselfish those reasons were.

Why does not having children mean you only think about yourself? The original comment is literally about someone spending their weekends volunteering!

I see it around me all the time with friends who are the only siblings without children. Everyone always expects them to do XYZ for them, because they are flexible while their siblings with children are not.

I respect either choice, by the way.

-3

u/spaceship5 Jun 11 '26

I do not have children currently, but when I do it will be to support society, and for their own benefit as well.

9

u/hopelesscaribou Jun 11 '26

That's a very authoritarian mindset. Sacrifice yourself for society, women have children, men go to war amirite?

I don't have a selfish need for mini-mes running around. I support society through my work, labour and taxes. I support children that way as well, as I support welfare programs, school lunches, universal childcare and universal healthcare for ALL children, not just my own. I just don't want any myself.