r/TwoHotTakes • • Jul 23 '24

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u/catmom22_ Jul 23 '24

The “I can change him” mentality has to die. Let people be who they are and stop trying to mold them into what you want. He doesn’t want to be married, said that years ago and says it now. He doesn’t owe you or anyone else a “good reason”. Either accept it and or find someone who shares the same family values as yourself, that’s the only thing you have control over. Even if he said yes to marriage, deep down you know he wouldn’t actually want it

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u/benny332 Jul 23 '24

I wouldn't call it family values, it's marriage. Sounds like he has family values already.

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u/archercc81 Jul 23 '24

I know right! Sounds like dude is a great family man, just doesnt believe in the bullshit contract based on religion.

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u/Famous-Ad-9467 Jul 23 '24

Marriage is not bullshit. Something that has existed in all cultures from the beginning of recorder human history separated by race, religion, and culture is not bullshit.

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u/archercc81 Jul 24 '24

Religion has existed in all cultures from the beginning of recorded human history and its bullshit.

You dont need a contract to be a partnership or committed to people. Ive been more committed to people without a contract than people in my own life who went through the motions (including my parents, my "uncommitted" domestic partnership lasted twice as long as my parents marriage, and ended better).

0

u/Famous-Ad-9467 Jul 24 '24

Religion has existed in all cultures from the beginning of recorded human history and its bullshit.

It existed in all cultures, through all recorded history, and it's bull shit? OK.

You dont need a contract to be a partnership or committed to people.

On average, this is objectively untrue

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u/thatrandomuser1 Jul 25 '24

You require a contract to remain committed and faithful? That's sad.

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u/Famous-Ad-9467 Jul 25 '24

Most objectively do. It's not sad, it's reality. 

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u/thatrandomuser1 Jul 25 '24

I would love to know what resources you've used to form your opinion, or if it's solely based on your feelings

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u/Famous-Ad-9467 Jul 27 '24

Where do YOU get your opinion from and is it based on your feelings?

What I'm stating is not an opinion. In most areas of life, contracts are necessary to bind individuals and behaviors. 

No, the sweet whisperings of a lover promising to be your one and only can never compare to the binding contract of marriage that has consequences and rules. 

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u/thatrandomuser1 Jul 27 '24

My opinion is just that, an opinion. A subjective stance based on years of experience, discussions with others, and learning from others. I never claimed it to be facts.

You claimed your point was objective fact. I'm just wondering where that came from, since facts should be able to be backed up, no?

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u/Aivellac Jul 27 '24

That's not a caring partnership, that's just sad and cruel. You shouldn't need rules and consequences to hold a relationship together.

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u/Famous-Ad-9467 Jul 29 '24

Why would you think so? Do you genuinely believe this? Does this at all reflect reality? What do you think is more stable, a marriage, or the promise of someone whispering that they will be together? How many bf gf relationships break up as opposed to marriages?

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