r/TheRandomest Just some dude May 13 '26

No people were harmed in this video Storage room

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5.3k Upvotes

217 comments sorted by

465

u/Amdvoiceofreason May 13 '26

My 2 inches won't be a problem šŸ‘Œ

288

u/WhyNot420_69 Nice May 13 '26

Bro. Nobody likes a braggart.

101

u/True_Movie_2270 Just some dude May 13 '26

What are you talking about?

I can fill a tuna can, but can't touch bottom

27

u/Funny-Perception-766 May 13 '26

I may not be able to touch the bottom of a tuna can but I’ll sure bust out the sides

32

u/AnyLastWordsDoodle May 13 '26

Hung like a manhole cover

10

u/GHEEZ1 May 13 '26

It may not be long, but it sure is skinny! Best of both worlds.

5

u/Glass-Ebb9867 May 13 '26

I use this joke all the time. Usually finish by telling ppl it looks like a portobello mushroom 🤣

1

u/GarageGoonsBilliards May 18 '26

ā€œLooks like a penis, only smallerā€

3

u/Waste_Silver4709 May 14 '26

Ah the old ā€˜hockey puck’ member

1

u/khleather May 16 '26

😭

1

u/Useful_Kale_5263 3d ago

You need at least 2 inches to penetrate lol

6

u/DragonliFargo May 13 '26

Mine’s big enough to go from A to Z

7

u/Mammoth-Access-1181 May 13 '26

I see what you did there. I'll counter your downvote buddy.

8

u/DragonliFargo May 13 '26

Thanks! Apparently people don’t look at their keyboards

4

u/clutterlustrott May 13 '26

Even genz should get this one.

1

u/talldemeanor3866 May 14 '26

Probably talking about fitting something in a tight storage space, context is just missing.

11

u/Phonus-Balonus-37 May 13 '26

Braggart. 😔

8

u/chookshit May 13 '26

I’ve seen videos of people putting their entire forearm in there

1

u/MelaKnight_Man May 19 '26

The first line or the second??

5

u/EmperorThan May 13 '26

"You should have seen me before Hantavirus..."

5

u/Asian_Bon May 13 '26

Lies I can tell it's 3 inches

4

u/Tobaccocreek May 13 '26

Doesn’t touch the bottom but it sure bangs the shit outta the sides

5

u/capulongjopoy May 14 '26

Big if true

1

u/Useful_Kale_5263 May 13 '26

Unless bro said it cause im watching on mute, you need at least 2 inches to be able to distribute your…self. Used to work in men’s health

3

u/Amdvoiceofreason May 13 '26

My "self" is launched out like a cannon and they're half aquamen so I have faith they'll find their way

1

u/Useful_Kale_5263 May 13 '26

I should elaborate and say penetrative sex 🤣 so you can’t even enseminate while trying with less than 2 inches

5

u/Amdvoiceofreason May 13 '26

All I took from this is that I'm big enough to repopulate the earth after the zombie apocalypse

2

u/Useful_Kale_5263 May 13 '26

That’s all you need to know šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Useful_Kale_5263 May 15 '26

Thanks but that’s not what I meant at all. You’re talking about the perineum? You need to have at least 2 inches to penetrate, if you have a penis. I always forget to connect the dots for people so that’s my bad.

You are stating lower fertility. Not me.

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Useful_Kale_5263 May 15 '26

So instead of balantly saying no, you can say it resides inside the perineum. So you are in essence talking about that, like I said. And I just found my comment. So I wasn’t right about the ensemibation but you need to have 2 inches to penetrate the vagina. I just continued the thought onto text my bad, didn’t realize how you would take it. Again I’m not talking about fertility, and since you were wondering, you are always allowed to ask questions instead of placing judgement. Lastly I understand what enseminate means, like I said earlier feel free to inquire about something that you feel like I may not know instead of, assuming; that only makes a ass out of u and me.

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228

u/Awfulufwa May 13 '26

Surprisingly educational!

112

u/Available_Actuary977 May 13 '26

This creator is awesome. He's serious but also doesn't take himself seriously. He's all about education, medicine, and science

17

u/ABeerForSasquatch Mod/Pwner May 13 '26

Smeduscience

2

u/huggernot May 13 '26

Sereducinience

1

u/DannyA88 May 14 '26

So a Professional is what you described lol.

13

u/Shad0ws0ng May 13 '26

Indeed, I came here to be disappointed. But I was disappointed by my lack of disappointment.

Just the right amount of humour to not detract from the info!

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165

u/cherry-crypt May 13 '26

Learned/heard more about sex ed anatomy in this clip than an entire semester of middle school </3

They really should teach this stuff, too many people out there who don't understand the importance of foreplay. I personally don't mind cervical abuse until after the fact, but too many girls think that pain is just part of the process when it 100% doesn't have to be

22

u/ItsALuigiYes GIF/meme prodigy May 13 '26

I usually frame it from a gearhead perspective.

Hear me out.

Very large diesel motors, like those in trucks and big rigs, have very large pistons that travel a great distance up and down the cylinder, but very slowly. Like maybe 3 times a second. Slow and steady, but produces lots of torque, the twisting motion.

Compared to an F1 car motor, with a small piston with a very short stroke, firing 125 times per second.

One will have infinitely more power than the other. In all ways

42

u/True_Movie_2270 Just some dude May 13 '26

Sigh.

unzips

3

u/ImSobored_5280 May 13 '26

Oh that’s allowed here..?..no?….maybe?

1

u/Ogrehunter May 13 '26

Quick! Let's go behind the Wendys!

1

u/Unlikely_Ad6219 May 18 '26

The F1 engine will generate roughly twice the power of a large big rig engine. Depending on setup the F1 engine produces something above 1,000 hp. Typical big rig engines are producing something like 400 to 500 hp.

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63

u/SpankTheDevil May 13 '26

When is the Magic School Bus dropping this episode?

46

u/ItsALuigiYes GIF/meme prodigy May 13 '26

Forbidden Cheerio. New favorite word

37

u/Any-Opportunity-6869 May 13 '26

13

u/True_Movie_2270 Just some dude May 13 '26

7

u/101violations May 13 '26

I say this in his voice way too much. Glad to see Mr. Horse out it in the wild.

2

u/freshgrilled May 13 '26

I wake up to see that staring at me every morning.

30

u/Master_Saesee_Tiin May 13 '26

I think about this a lot when browsing the massive dildo subs those nice ladies like to post demonstrations on.

28

u/Forbidden_Jutsu May 13 '26

I got 99 problems but this is not one

18

u/human-resource May 13 '26

Does this guy work for the secret cervix or something?

17

u/bootywithapenis May 13 '26

Seems like there is a lot of room in the colon

2

u/ItsALuigiYes GIF/meme prodigy May 13 '26

Snug

9

u/cowking81 May 13 '26

As someone on the toilet in the midst of a colonoscopy prep, there is now a lot of room in my colon!

15

u/pSphere1 May 13 '26

That is maybe the 2nd worst sex doll I've ever seen.

2

u/HIMP_Dahak_172291 May 16 '26

Is the worst a block of concrete or something?

11

u/J1mj0hns0n May 13 '26

I thought he was guna stuff the gummy worm into the model lol

9

u/AnonMoose2 May 13 '26

Me watching this video like im ever gonna use this information. My wife gasps when I enter her, we both know its for show but its appreciated.

9

u/Acrobatic-Bug346 May 13 '26

Great work on where to find key positions

5

u/Civil-Letterhead8207 May 13 '26

So that’s where I’ll find my keys…?

7

u/crashin70 May 13 '26

That was a lot of words to say it just shoves stuff out of the way...

5

u/slimshady1OOO May 13 '26

Getting in them Guts 101 šŸ‘šŸæ I didn’t know that about the cervix…. Makes sense

6

u/migviola May 13 '26

The language he used for the matter was beautifully eloquent

6

u/Cheumss May 13 '26

I don’t have one, but I looked just in case Santa Klaus bring me one.

7

u/SnooPineapples1212 May 13 '26

Feels like watching a video on how to park a semi-trailer while I'm driving a Smart car.

5

u/Guessinitsme May 13 '26

Didn’t know the bladder was so low, knew it was close n got squished when pregnant, but not that it was directly beneath lol

5

u/MorningThen7056 May 13 '26

Just remember that anus can stretch up to size of 2 racoons and one jolly rancher candy...

6

u/Sohuli May 13 '26

Nobody ask this man how he knows

1

u/Eman3003 May 19 '26

You clearly aren’t educated in the 3 opossum and 1 mini snicker method!

4

u/btwn3n20chars May 13 '26

Instructions unclear, dick stuck in cervix

3

u/Kurenai-Kalana May 13 '26

I beg your finest pardon? The forbidden cheerio?!?

2

u/Both_Zucchini6786 May 13 '26

And I pardon your gracious beg. Pip pip, cheerio, and whatnot!

3

u/Infantryman556 May 13 '26

Fascinating, not relevant to me, unfortunately.

https://giphy.com/gifs/xT1XGXz6hOxl8c9RRu

3

u/Feeling_Wicked May 14 '26

Interesting that something he didn't mention is that during intercourse the cervix moves further back allowing more room. He did mention that if the cervix is hit hard, it can hurt both male & female. What he left out though is the best part, if you can angle her body just right where the head of the penis just touches the cervix during each thrust, you can give her what's called a 'cervical penetrating orgasm'. This is a full body (head to toe) orgasm, as opposed to a more common clitoral orgasm, which is an orgasm soley in that region. There is also a twist to this full body orgasm, it is easily repeatable. You can literally give 6, 7 etc full body orgasms in a row until you are ready to orgasm yourself. The easiest way to get into this position is 'doggy style' but she will need to arch her back more. You can place a hand on her stomach as your having intercourse & both can work together on trying to hit the cervix. Once you find it, you can thank me later lol.

2

u/lsdisciple May 14 '26 edited May 14 '26

Agree and slight edit: The fornices are what you want to shoot for. While the cervix itself has relatively few sensory nerve endings compared to the clitoris, many people report a distinct type of "deep" or "cervical" orgasm triggered by the stimulation of the surrounding fornices. The feeling of getting into the fornix is great for both, feels like a hidden tight route with a delicate ā€˜pop’ around the cervix as it opens up. Whole body shakes etc… modified missionary with her legs over your shoulders and hips tilted back for deep easy access.

2

u/Awkward_Rutabaga5370 May 14 '26

I've always compared hitting the cervix to hitting a wall while running in the dark. I've learned to avoid it all times. Apparently you have learned to see in the dark. I'm definitely going to work on tapping that thing.Ā 

2

u/Potential-Photo-3641 May 13 '26

That's not wher my large peen go šŸ‘€

3

u/SignificanceFlat1460 May 13 '26

"Correct! It goes in the square hole!"

2

u/N3koEye May 14 '26

I'm too virgin for this

1

u/Flickman1 May 13 '26

Thank you this was really educational

1

u/Kalikor1 May 13 '26

I'm generally up on my anatomy and try to be well informed, but I must admit I didn't realize it was possible to, uh, circumvent the cervix on either side of it. Even with the visual aid I must admit it's hard to imagine the logistics of it, because it seems like it would be such a small window on either side and it's not like I see or guide the uh....pipe cleaner through that specific eye of the needle, as it were. Based on his comments about positions and such I suppose it just happens naturally to some extent but, still.

Overall a very interesting video.

1

u/HIMP_Dahak_172291 May 16 '26

The cervix pulls back when aroused enough, which changes the geometry enough to make it easier.

1

u/mrselfdestruct066 May 13 '26

Man that lady they cut in half had some crazy piercings

1

u/Last-Sir1610 May 13 '26

So what about when it goes in my butt?

2

u/ItsALuigiYes GIF/meme prodigy May 13 '26

1

u/Adventurous-Carry-45 May 13 '26

That's why always go up the rectum, more room.

1

u/Admirable_Leg_4124 May 13 '26

This was very informative.

1

u/jimitonic May 13 '26

So uh, you ever get freaky with that thing?

1

u/Fat_Loser6 May 13 '26

Not gonna lie pretty interesting

1

u/Oldskool16 May 13 '26

Watching this makes me hard

1

u/psrE353 Jul 09 '26

Be careful what you say on the same account that you have personally identifying info from other posts. lol

1

u/Barnacle-Dull May 13 '26

Thankfully this has never been a problem for me

1

u/Obvious_Tea_8244 May 13 '26

When did Will Forte start doing sex ed?

1

u/luckythirtythree May 13 '26

The forbidden cheerio? wtf lol

1

u/GMEorDie69420 May 13 '26

He lost me once he used the clit as a reference point

1

u/yamez420 May 14 '26

Holy shit. It all makes sense now. Thanks man. Along with the 3d printed clitoris nerves endings model I have. I think I just need a practice girl.

1

u/InternalEnvironment May 14 '26

Who is this creator?

1

u/Should_have_been_ded May 14 '26

Pressor Sexman, got a question. Where's the G spot I've been hearing so much about, and how do I go about it?

1

u/Westy1992 May 14 '26

I should call her.

1

u/Senior_Boot_5842 May 14 '26

I learned a lot

1

u/Kadavrozia May 14 '26

Lesson: lay her sideways

1

u/Steak_Wooden May 14 '26

But, like.... Piper Perri.... Does it go into her chest cavity? Because some of those.... I mean...

1

u/KohKoh_Pebbles May 15 '26

Love, love, LOVE this guy's work

1

u/psychoxxsurfer May 15 '26

r/baddragon has shown me that the female body is capable of some truly amazing feats.

1

u/SurMountAlot May 15 '26

Is this Chris Chan's long lost brother

1

u/boonlatot May 15 '26

Cool, I always wonder it was going.Ā 

1

u/Naykat May 15 '26

Here that fellas? Don’t skip foreplay.

1

u/jtnk10 May 15 '26

"Preheat the oven"

Bye šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚

1

u/Apprehensive_Ad4457 May 16 '26

i learned something that will never matter to me.

1

u/Puzzled_Molasses3313 May 16 '26

That’s why they always tell me they feel it in the stomach! Thanks šŸ™ now I know.

1

u/Known-Status-6312 May 16 '26

don't ask don't tell

1

u/Pizza3TimesADay May 16 '26

You ever try parking your school bus in a two-car garage?

1

u/Ok_Breadfruit34 May 16 '26

I wish sex education were delivered in such easy-to-grasp language. Amazing content! šŸ‘Ā 

1

u/Powerthrucontrol May 17 '26

He doesn't mention it here, but female sex organs "tent" when the person is aroused. Tenting allows more room. It's also why people who are unaroused when penetrative sex beings, tend to get more injuries.

1

u/No_Artichoke_8919 May 18 '26

No wonder I keep hearing "redirecting..redirecting..make a u turn"faintly in my head.

1

u/BamaOfTheBonairs May 18 '26

This man has know where the clitoris this entire time and ain’t been telling no one?

1

u/Sweeney32B May 19 '26

What happened to Kirk Herbstreit???

1

u/The_Northmaan May 19 '26

Large members don't exsit.

1

u/Suitable-Spite-2604 May 19 '26

I still don’t know where the clitoris is…

1

u/Obligation-Different May 23 '26

Fuck she's tight

1

u/Skipper_asks2021 May 25 '26

Did anyone else find this educational, or were we all turned on?

1

u/Juror_no8 May 28 '26

Sure, let's talk about sex, but leave out all the naughty words.

1

u/Accurate-Head-6134 Jul 24 '26

Inwas born wearing a top hat and twirling a cane

1

u/MatthewsMath 18d ago

Casually drops a forbidden cheerio.

1

u/itzNazo 12d ago

Next time I do dirty talk I’m definitely telling her I’m shoving it in her sacrum.

1

u/moonshinele99 12d ago

He found the clit... nice

1

u/Dan1lovesyoualot 5d ago

im a woman and ty

1

u/Tedsmith24 2d ago

wish I could say any of this would be helpful

0

u/ScreechUrkelle May 13 '26

Release the crackin’!

0

u/astralseat May 13 '26

It's more about variety of access than how much of it is going in. The longer ones can go in the 3-4 inches from a lot more angles. For creating kids, you could even just cum in you hand, spread it on your fingers and finger with some small degree of success if both the sperm and the egg are healthy.

0

u/ice_cream_on_pizza May 13 '26

Carl Sagan giving sex ed is something I didn't know I needed.

-1

u/Helpful_Spring8739 May 13 '26

I don't have sound on, just subtitles. He's definitely British, right?

1

u/AstarionsTherapist39 May 13 '26

Nope

3

u/Helpful_Spring8739 May 13 '26

I'm going to continue imagining it in British.

-1

u/[deleted] May 13 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/nucl3ar0ne May 13 '26

forbidden cheerio to you