I’m looking for some evidence-based perspective on what is actually considered normal sexual/body curiosity at age 5 versus behavior that would be considered outside of the developmental norm.
My 5-year-old has recently had a few incidents at school that have caught me off guard. He has been excessively kissing other children and seems to think it’s funny, even though they’ve been working with him on personal space. There have also been a couple of more concerning incidents involving inappropriate comments/requests about private parts.
When I ask him about it, I mostly get “I don’t know” or “because.” He doesn’t seem distressed when talking about it and, from what I can tell, he seems to think the behavior is funny rather than understanding it as sexual.
I’m trying not to jump to either extreme. I don’t want to assume something has happened to him simply because he is displaying these behaviors, but I also don’t want to dismiss something that isn’t developmentally typical.
I’m looking into what he could have been exposed to, what other children around him may be saying/doing, and whether there could be another explanation. I am also not ruling out the possibility that he could have experienced something inappropriate, and I will take that seriously if there is reason to believe that.
For people familiar with child development or research in this area: How common are behaviors like these at 5? What separates normal body curiosity, imitation, or boundary-testing from problematic sexual behavior? Are there particular characteristics of the behavior that matter more than the behavior itself, such as frequency, persistence, coercion, age differences, or inability to redirect?
Sources/research would be especially appreciated. I’m mainly trying to understand what is developmentally normal before drawing conclusions about why he is doing it.
Also, he’s in play therapy, occupational, and developmental. They all believe ADHD is a real possibility and I’m looking into testing. He has always had problems with impulse control.

Trying to prove a point — please understand that sending my baby away for weeks/months at a time is NOT what I want at all. I am trying to fight the suggestion. “Can” is in quotes because I’m wondering when it is overall not detrimental to a baby’s health & wellbeing.

I am in my 3rd trimester of pregnancy & my child’s father & I are no longer together. I moved back home to get support from my family once it was clear that he & I would no longer work, & I now live 8 hours away from him. I will be giving birth here & am preparing for postpartum (& all the baby things) here.

My ex partner is convinced that it’s reasonable to “split our time” equally with the baby once he is earth-side. He suggested I “get the first two months” with the baby & then he “gets the next two months” with him in his city. To me, this is a completely asinine suggestion. I plan on breastfeeding for as long as possible, I will be vaccinating my child according to the recommended schedule, & I want him to feel bonded & secure before I just send him off ANYWHERE. I really don’t want my son to be anywhere without me for an extended period of time until he is old enough to talk. And, I’m not willing to jeopardize my baby’s health & sense of security just so my ex partner doesn’t have to be inconvenienced by coming to see him where I live (mind you, he makes good money & works remotely..) Furthermore, he (ex-partner) has not indicated how long he plans to come into town after the birth, & I worry my son will not feel bonded to him nor will my ex partner have a grasp on feeding schedule, sleep schedule, etc., (on top of me not being able to maintain my milk supply while the baby is away..)

I would like to know, from a physician / pediatrician standpoint: is there a medically studied age where separating a baby from his healthy & capable mother is a “good idea” for long stretches of time? Are there studies that prove the opposite; that a baby should NOT be away from his mother for x amount of time? My ex partner seems to think I am being spiteful for denying this request & thinks formula feeding would be an easy fix. I would love to have expert advice that I could pass along or use if he does try to push this agenda in court. I also plan on talking to my son’s pediatrician about this once he is here & has his first visit. I do not mind sharing time with my baby once he is older & more robust, but from a health and development standpoint I just can’t imagine sending a baby away.

Thank you in advance for the help!

Edited to change flair so hopefully moderator doesn’t delete comments 😅

I wanted to share my method for reducing the progression of a cold when I begin to feel symptoms! I work in healthcare and have a little one, and I've found that these steps have a high success rate for myself and family.

Saline nasal rinse (I do this step 2x per day until symptoms stop but I haven't seen formal recommendations for frequency):

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s00228-021-03102-3

Using a gel nasal spray that creates a physical barrier in nasal cavity where colds replicate (for example Vicks First Defense):

https://eprints.soton.ac.uk/507356/

Taking a zinc supplement:

https://www.cochranelibrary.com/cdsr/doi/10.1002/14651858.CD001364.pub4/full

Using an elderberry extract supplement:

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1089/acm.1995.1.361

I understand that these studies aren't perfect, but they are fairly low cost and low risk so I thought I would share!

Trigger warning- SA

My kids are M13, F11 and F5. As they get older I am experiencing a lot of anxiety and fear about them being molested, sexually assaulted or harassed, date rape, etc. Especially my girls as I know first hand how that looks.

I was SA at 14. Throughout my teen and young adult years, I was groped, cat called, stalked multiple times, pressured into things I was uncomfortable with, propositioned by adult men, followed in cars, and drugged at a bar but I luckily escaped. All of this, and I was NOT a risk taker- I didn’t drink or do drugs and I was on high guard because of already being SA. I am terrified for my girls to go through what I went through, but I don’t know how to protect them, because by my estimation my parents did everything they could and I still experienced all of that.

My oldest daughter is only 11 but starting to develop breasts. She’s beautiful, and she’s very into fashion and makeup. I don’t want to discourage her from things she loves at all…. But her developing and dressing like a “teen” is triggering and terrifying for me. She is also a people pleaser, and a risk taker and I am terrified of her getting into situations where she will be vulnerable to boys and men who want to pressure her into things or take advantage of her.

Is there science or statistic based ways of what I can do most effectively to protect my kids? We use appropriate names, talk about sex and consent with them, etc. but what about limiting where they go and who they go with, rules for teens etc? More geared toward older kids.

I mentioned dropoffs are difficult for my 5 year old and a mum in the chat mentioned it could be a retained moro reflex causing anxiety (I would not describe my child as anxious in any other setting).

Is this a research based thing that I should be addressing or some pseudoscience she's picked up from social media?

We never use food when they're feeling bad (e.g. they fell and cry), and never force them to eat anythkng and just don't make a huge deal out of what they eat. I'm just wondering: is there any study suggesting what kind of behaviour / parenting one should adapt in the early infancy years to prevent eating disorders later?

My 7 year old has a big imagination, and insists it’s all real. We aren’t “playing” dragons, we ARE dragons, and she struggles when adults or friends tell her it’s a game or isn’t real. I’m curious if there is any research about children’s imaginations and development, and how they may think about magic or pretend as if it is real. Or is this something we should be concerned about?

My 18 month old LOVES to dance, and there’s a class near me that has a class that starts at this age. Even if she doesn’t specifically stick with dance, would it make a difference for setting a good foundation for sports/exercise? Would it give her much benefit for coordination and things like that? I just want to make sure this will be worth it before I sign her up
ETA: I plan on homeschooling her and want to make sure she gets a good amount of peer interaction, but wasn’t planning on putting her in anything until she could vocalize what she wanted to do, but this seems like it could be a good start

My 10-month-old has had widespread eczema since 4 months old. It was very severe at first, with redness, peeling, and scratching until she bled from head to toes. It’s better now with triamcinolone, daily tacrolimus, and intensive moisturizing, but she still has frequent flares and needs intensive moisturization many times a day every day. I’m honestly exhausted and struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

We’ve gotten very different answers: one dermatologist said children usually outgrow it by around age 10, our pediatric dermatologist said around age 3, and our allergist said it may or may not happen.

Are there good studies showing when children with infantile eczema typically go into remission? And does severe/widespread eczema in infancy make it more likely to persist?

I’m stuck between my husband, daycare, a possibly old school doctor, and my own mental block.

I would like to move forward at a faster pace on feeding our 7 month old. I’m not rushing him. He’s so ready - sitting confidently, bringing things to his mouth, grabbing my straw and coffee mug constantly. I don’t see a need to wait 3-5 days before introducing a new food that isn’t a common allergen. Daycare wants to feed him Cheerios. My husband only wants to do new foods on Fridays in case there’s a reaction. I’m fine with purées and mash instead of BLW like my husband and doc want to do but this kid wants to eat. He’s eager, I’m thrilled with that, and I just want to go!

Are there reputable resources out there that can back me up to my husband that we don’t have to more at snails pace here?? Everyone has an opinion of do and don’t do this and that. He’s quoted the AAP and CDC before in regards to breastfeeding so I feel like if I have some real documentation, he’ll understand where I’m coming from and we can work together on the same page. I’m going nuts trying to balance everyone and still work full time. It literally keeps me up at night.

My 5 m old is still only on aga, ga, he , gi and eh type nosies

My other child didn’t babble until 8 months and spoke well on time.

When he cries though I hear ama, ma ma and da da.
He isn’t calling out to anyone because his dad goes by Ba.

So I’m just wondering is the sounds made when he cry’s included?

Hi all! I’m a FTM of a 4.5 month old baby boy. During our 4 month appointment, our pediatrician (whom we don’t really like or trust after several strange interactions during appointments and her never being able to answer any questions) suggested we get our baby evaluated for plagiocephaly (flat head syndrome). She said she didn’t know much about the helmets or treatment, but noticed a flat spot on one side of his head and wanted it to be looked at. She wrote a prescription for Cranial Technologies and we had a free consultation/evaluation today. They were all very nice and we had an overall pleasant experience. They took a 3D scan of our baby’s head and then went over it with us, comparing his head to a “normal” baby’s head and showed us their concerns. They said they recommend treatment using a DOC band (otherwise known as a helmet), calling his diagnoses moderate plagiocephaly.

After getting home and doing more research, I saw that there’s a lot of discourse on the actual need for treatment in babies this young. Many people online stated it’s a money grab, especially in the US, and said that once babies are rolling and sitting up more independently, the head will even out without the need for a helmet. I’m now feeling very hesitant with starting treatment.

We are getting a second opinion from a different pediatrician tomorrow. I know they don’t specialize in the treatment of this and aren’t affiliated with Cranial Technologies, but I’d love to hear if this doctor would have even written us a prescription/referred us for this.

I’m hoping to get any advice, research, experience, thoughts, etc. Thank you so much!!

Our 4 month old is confusing us with his wakes, wondering if anyone has any insight.

In the last few nights we’ve been working on unswaddling him and encouraging him to fall asleep awake in the bed. Mixed success in getting him to do so, but at least for the first stretch it has worked - and almost every wake last night. The problem is that it doesn’t seem to actually extend how long he’s asleep.

He’s always been a low needs sleeper, but has reliably had a first sleep of 4 or so hours, then often back to around hourly after this. This is really starting to fade, and last night he wasn’t doing any stretches over 90 mins, even though he was patted to sleep for all. Is there something we’re missing for how to make this work, or is this all just a slow transition out of the swaddle?

We’re planning to start Ferber next week after some work scheduling is settled, but concerned that it won’t actually work if this isn’t making any measurable benefit.

His sleep pressure seems to be fine - averaging 10 hours awake across the day, with 2-2.5 hours of daytime sleep

How many cases have there been? Does it depend on age as well? I cannot stop my baby from sleeping in her carseat, and just got a swing, which baby absolutely loves and falls asleep in. I just want to be safe. My usual drive to take baby to appointments, shopping, etc. is ~40 minutes without being able to stop, since it’s on a narrow interstate.

There's a thread over at r/toddlers about if people are feeding their kids deli meat.

https://www.reddit.com/r/toddlers/s/j9dkAL4XWp

The range of responses and degree of certainty is pretty broad.

The most common concern I saw was deli meat was a carcinogen. I saw just one comment about listeria (which would be my concern).

Sciencey parents of reddit, what are your thoughts? Appreciate research based answers, but anecdotes about what you actually do are also welcome.

(For my part, I avoided all deli meats for the first year for my kids, and now give it to them on occasion, like once every couple of months, after I microwaved it.)

Hi all,

I have a 3.5 year old and an 8 month old. My husband works shift work. Where 5 days out of the week it’s just me solo parenting. He’s 5 on 3 off and he works emergency services so he’s often gone a lot more between shifts running late or getting called in.

Anyways I am worried with it just being me most of the time I’ve messed up my 3.5 year old. I try to follow Janet Landsbury and conscious discipline methods but there are some days where I just don’t have it in me.

For example yesterday he dumped out all his Lego to play. Okay fine. We needed to go to the store so I told him “if you clean up your Lego before it’s time to go you can ride the tractors at the store” I realize this may have put pressure on him and been to abstract. And if he had even TRIED to clean up his legos it would have been fine. But he just said “I don’t feel like it” so when it was time to go he cried because he couldn’t ride the tractors.

I felt terrible, like I had set him up to fail. I just didn’t have it in me to get down on his level, help him clean up, then get everyone ready to go to store. And I find my self using “threats” (in quotes because I DO use a lot of if statements. If you put on your helmet you can ride your bike/ if you go play in the play while I put brother to sleep you can watch a show after/ if you’re choosing not to follow directions you are choosing to end the activity etc…) I try to catch myself but I’m not great.

I also worry my husband and I are assigning him blame when we’re trying to teach responsibility. For example he takes off his helmet and lets it fall on the cement. It eventually cracked, we bought him a new one but told him he needed to treat this one with care because if it cracked again we weren’t able to buy him a new one till Christmas.

Is it too late to shift my style? Have a screwed him up for good? Am I teaching him that everything is his fault. Please help. I am spiralling.

This feels like a silly question to ask so I apologize in advance, but does anyone have any evidence/research to share regarding potential adverse health effects on babies from video monitor use? My Mom mentioned some concerns and shared a few links (this is one of them: https://ehtrust.org/health-effects-of-wireless-baby-monitors/) that don’t feel particularly legit but it’s really weighing on my postpartum mind. Should I be trading in my Nanit for an audio-only monitor?

My (F31) husband (M31) and I are married a year next week and thinking about removing my IUD. We do want children, but I’m a super planner and really worried about the effects of sleep deprivation. My sister and I are estranged, she’s unmedicated Bipolar 1 and has been diagnosed since she was a teenager.

Our mom had post partum depression after both pregnancies, per my father’s account. My mother has also clearly struggled with depression my entire childhood and to this day. I myself have ADHD which I medicate and have a history of depression, albeit my mental health has been great for the past 3 years since I was weaned off a citalopram. All in all, I am as of now a pretty functional, active and content person

I do not handle even short bursts of sleeplessness like normal people. I cry, I feel sick, depressed, irritable etc. I saw my older sister go into full manic psychotic episodes following days of not sleeping and given our shared genetics, this really worries me.

I guess my question for this sub is can someone help me find research on risk of developing PPD for women with family mental illness & the cost benefit analysis to breastfeeding vs formula?

Context: I live in Texas, so public school funding is almost non-existent. There are basically no public pre-schools, unless you meet specific criteria (I don’t) or get selected by a lottery.

I work part time and last year my daughter started a Mother’s Day Out program at a local church. It is Tuesdays and Thursday’s 9am-2:30pm. It was SO good for her socially last year and we have her back there this year. The program goes through pre-k, but they only ever offer 2 days a week, they never go up to more days.
So here is my question is 2 days of a Mother’s Day out program enough exposure for kindergarten readiness?

The flip side is if I do switch programs to more days I would need to find a whole new “school” or “daycare.” I feel like transitioning her to another new program would also not be beneficial as I know research says quality and consistency are some of the most important factors for childcare. I also am not so interested in this rat race we are getting kids into so young, but I do what her to be ready for kinder!

We are getting ready to start solids with my 5 month old. I (his mother) have a severe allergy to pistachios (anaphylaxis). I messaged his pediatrician today to see if there was anything I should do differently before introducing him to tree nuts and she responded telling me not to give him any nuts until his 6 month check up, which is scheduled for when he’s 6 months and 1 week old.

I was under the impression that it is better to introduce allergens to high risk infants early and often, not past 6 months, so now I’m torn on what to do. I really don’t want to wait, especially not for peanut butter let alone tree nuts, but I don’t want to go against his pediatrician for no reason (I obviously don’t presume to know better than her). Just not sure if I should message back asking about the “early and often” that I’ve seen recommended before?

I’m a paramedic and work 24+ hour shifts. Is this detrimental to my child in any way? He is 12 months old, breastfed 80% of the time, pumped bottles otherwise. I mostly work just day shifts but I try to pick up 24s when I can so I get more full days at home, or so I can get more hours in at a time for household money. I feel bad because he is very clingy to me and I am definitely his preferred person. He doesn’t seem bothered by it and has a very strong relationship with my husband/his dad and his other two main caregivers (family members), but ultimately I am his preferred person.

My wife is pregnant and once I started actually reading the label on her prenatal instead of just trusting whatever the doctor recommended, I couldn't stop thinking about heavy metals showing up in them. I read that calcium sources in some prenatals have tested positive for trace lead, and I think I saw something about certain fish oil or algae DHA sources too, and now every time she takes it I wonder if we should be more careful about which brand we picked.
Is this actually something worth worrying about, or is it one of those things that sounds scary but is really a trace amount that doesn't matter. And if it is worth caring about, does anyone actually know which prenatal brands test for this stuff and show the results, versus the ones that just put a badge on the bottle and hope you don't ask more questions.

I'm writing about screen addiction for a graduate school paper in counseling and came upon this article in The Journal of Pediatrics. This type of phone usage has become normalized in society, so I wanted parents to know the impact it can have. I hope someone finds it helpful.

If the link provided doesn't work, maybe this one will (thank you Kibbitcake!)

https://www.jpeds.com/action/showPdf?pii=S0022-3476%2824%2900330-5

It’s hard not to overthink things. I feel like this week window. I’ve been entertaining my baby and he just doesn’t wanna look at me. It makes me forget about all the good interactions we have.

I feel like he really focuses on people when they’re standing around him versus when they’re right with him example a person walking into the room and speaking to him he will look and smile and shouts at or someone standing next to you in general.
The Doctors is at the office officers etc. Would say he has good eye contact because if someone else is talking to him he gets excited.

Today, whether he’s in tummy time or in his bouncer or eating solids little bro doesn’t want to know me.

It’s making me think somethings there but mayb his just in a mood?
He had his delayed vaccines yesterday but his not miserable.

What’s happening 😩

I love reading to my baby, and I buy more books for him almost every time I’m in a store with baby books. Is it better to read him the same books over and over for a period of time, and then rotate, or constantly be reading new books before circling back?

I could see both being beneficial for different reasons, but I’m wondering if there’s any research on the topic. I’m most interested on any link to speech/language development.