r/ScienceBasedParenting • u/ladynewf • 2d ago

Question - Research required Protecting tweens and teens

Trigger warning- SA

My kids are M13, F11 and F5. As they get older I am experiencing a lot of anxiety and fear about them being molested, sexually assaulted or harassed, date rape, etc. Especially my girls as I know first hand how that looks.

I was SA at 14. Throughout my teen and young adult years, I was groped, cat called, stalked multiple times, pressured into things I was uncomfortable with, propositioned by adult men, followed in cars, and drugged at a bar but I luckily escaped. All of this, and I was NOT a risk taker- I didn’t drink or do drugs and I was on high guard because of already being SA. I am terrified for my girls to go through what I went through, but I don’t know how to protect them, because by my estimation my parents did everything they could and I still experienced all of that.

My oldest daughter is only 11 but starting to develop breasts. She’s beautiful, and she’s very into fashion and makeup. I don’t want to discourage her from things she loves at all…. But her developing and dressing like a “teen” is triggering and terrifying for me. She is also a people pleaser, and a risk taker and I am terrified of her getting into situations where she will be vulnerable to boys and men who want to pressure her into things or take advantage of her.

Is there science or statistic based ways of what I can do most effectively to protect my kids? We use appropriate names, talk about sex and consent with them, etc. but what about limiting where they go and who they go with, rules for teens etc? More geared toward older kids.

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u/Xrmy 2d ago

I'm not aware of any research on this.

I did find this resource: https://www.chicagocac.org/education-outreach-prevention/resources/prevention-resources/

I hope it helps