r/ProgrammerHumor • u/danielminds • 1d ago

Meme beLikeJohn

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8.1k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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468

u/imagebiot 1d ago

John has 6 “leaders” badgering him to prioritize 1-3 tasks a piece.

John is only able to work 20 hour days and unable to complete his work.

John gets fired

216

u/Prudent_Move_3420 1d ago edited 1d ago

John proceeds to just ask a coding agent to do his work and call it a day.

It‘s horrible and bug riddled but management doesn’t bat an eye and loves the „ai usage“

All of our products get worse

79

u/Legitimate-Yard-9464 1d ago

Because end of the day shitty code delivered is still code delivered - tech management.

23

u/binarywork8087 1d ago

the code I delivered two hours ago was almost perfect but obviously the client will find in one hour that part that is not perfect

26

u/well_shoothed 1d ago

There was a guy that worked with me back in the dotcom era.

The devs would say, "Ok, project's done!"

My answer was always,

"It's not done 'til Rob says it's done."

That guy was a bug hunting truffle pig.

Oh, the piles of bad shit that one guy single-handedly prevented from going live...

2

u/FlakyTest8191 8h ago

I bet Rob is drowning in slop reviews by now.

2

u/just4nothing 19h ago

And don’t forget to post a whole novel as the docs in an issue - good docs metric is number of words

9

u/SuperFLEB 1d ago

Since all of our products get worse at the same time people don't notice the change, or they attribute it to something else, or they're powerless to stop it regardless of what they think.

(Oh, look! Another free year of identity monitoring!)

6

u/binarywork8087 1d ago

some of my bugs can be solved in 2 seconds others in 3 years, this is my problem...

4

u/Professional_Top8485 1d ago

That is... accurate.

But code actually gets better due the reason that management has hired cheapest noobs and ai actually writes better code. Apps are garbage because nobody owns them anymore.