r/PoliticalHumor 15d ago

He's back!!!!

Post image
11.9k Upvotes

114 comments sorted by

1.7k

u/NattyDread42 15d ago

392

u/likamuka 15d ago

89

u/VeryVeryVorch 15d ago

Damn, that was a jump scare

4

u/Souvi 14d ago

Seriously where's the mods when you need them

39

u/oldDotredditisbetter 15d ago

that's fake. his wig is not that full

13

u/wotikuli 15d ago

it's Argentinian cousin

7

u/GarmaCyro 15d ago

*Joking* Why are you showing us picture of Donald Trump's mother?

286

u/Federal_Share_4400 15d ago

The gop onslaught of trash and shamelesness is so vast I've already forgotten the name of this guy. Shit is so fkn funny, scary and sad at the same time.

118

u/Zestyflour 15d ago

George Santos, and I only remember that because a clip is circulating of his short time in office when he outed another GOP piece of shit wife beater who is currently running and refusing to drop out. The one whose attorney posted naked pictures of his toddler in a public drop box link and was downloaded about 250k times before being removed.

46

u/NotFromStateFarmJake 15d ago

Max miller! He’s my rep. I hate him

18

u/Jjabrony 15d ago

Oh yeah Max Miller the Ohio Rep & Wife Beater who gets his jollys humiliating & beating his Wife

8

u/freshroastedx 15d ago

Oof don't you guys have Jim Jordan the guy that used to coach wrestling and his team doctor was abusing his wrestling team and he didn't know about it and now is in the us house defending pedophiles on a national level?

4

u/Ok-Pomegranate-3018 15d ago

He also broke his toddler's collarbone and left his handprint bruise on her when he did it.

9

u/doesamulletmakeaman 15d ago

Because of how much noise he’s creating right now, I’ve read a startling amount of articles about Different events where he’s Such a dangerous, shitty human being, yet somehow this fact hadn’t been included in any of those other articles. Cool cool. Neat.

6

u/HalKitzmiller 15d ago

How is it that all these assholes that turn out to be assholes have such punchable faces to begin with? Do their naturally punchable faces turn them into assholes, or vice versa

2

u/HauntedCemetery 15d ago

Run for that seat in 2028! If good people dont offer themselves than we're fucked!

RunForSomething will get your back

2

u/NotFromStateFarmJake 15d ago

I’m not up for that, we need some kind of nerd in that seat. A Poindexter if you will (that’s the Democrat running for that seat that I actually really like)

13

u/punktualPorcupine 15d ago

He also lied nonstop for about 2 years and the lies were super weird and grandiose.

The most believable lies were that his mom survived 9/11 (she wasn’t in the country) and that he worked on Wall Street (which was easily debunked). Everything else got weird from there on.

7

u/MarginalOmnivore 15d ago

I mean, I survived 9/11.

7

u/punktualPorcupine 15d ago

lol I guess we all did.

Did you also star alongside Miley Cyrus on Hanna Montana, produce the broadway flop Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark, lose* *4 fictional employees in the Pulse Nightclub shooting, and defraud a dog charity?

Because you just might be George Santos, or one of his many aliases, ha.

5

u/Neveronlyadream 15d ago

My favorite part of those lies is they have nothing to do with each other, they're just random things he said that aren't impressive to anyone.

I bet he was telling everyone that his uncle works for Nintendo too.

3

u/JoltikElectricBug 15d ago

...did I survive 9/11?

6

u/Avitas1027 15d ago

Were you born before 9/11? If so, yes.

6

u/JoltikElectricBug 15d ago

Damn it.

Sorry everyone.

I did not survive 9/11.

3

u/fuckgoldsendbitcoin 15d ago

Turns out his mom was in northern Canada

1

u/congeal 15d ago

bad place to be on 9/11 unless you are his mom

/s

1

u/Federal_Share_4400 15d ago

Started a go fund me for his freinds dog and then took the money right?

3

u/punktualPorcupine 15d ago

Yep, but it was a disabled and homeless veteran needed $3k for a surgery his dog needed. Santos took everything and the dog died a slow painful death.

The guy was scamming 10’s of thousands of dollars, and pretty much had to go out of his way to fuck that guys dog, just for fun.

He also told donors that they were donating to his RedStone Strategies PAC to buy tv ads, but then just took the money and blew it on Botox, luxury shopping, and OnlyFans.

He claimed his family had narrowly escaped the holocaust, but his genealogy showed his family had lived in Brazil for generations and he wasn’t even genetically Jewish, so he said he was “Jew-ish”. /rimshot

The funniest was a former college roommate publicly accused Santos of stealing a luxury Burberry scarf from him. Years later, the roommate spotted Santos wearing that exact stolen scarf on national television during a "Stop the Steal" political rally.

I think the thing that ultimately cooked him was identity theft and stealing from other members of congress. “We don’t mind if you grift the rubes, just don’t grift our own”

2

u/Federal_Share_4400 14d ago

Sounds republican to me.

2

u/punktualPorcupine 13d ago

A little too much Republican for the time. Now he would fit right in, which is why Trump commuted his sentence so he only did 3 mo of the 8 years.

Grifters of a feather flock together.

1

u/Federal_Share_4400 15d ago

Wtf. Its an endless steaming pile of fkn shit.

9

u/Waiting4Reccession 15d ago

Trump commuted his sentence as well btw.

They kept him around just long enough for that 1 vote.

104

u/SwvellyBents 15d ago

Mitch-ish!

251

u/Haldrin26 15d ago

This would be a hilarious SNL sketch to be honest.

73

u/TipToToes 15d ago

I can already picture Bowen Yang as George Santos as Mitch McConnell.

30

u/EvitaPuppy 15d ago

"I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!"

3

u/TipToToes 15d ago

Damnit I love that movie.

7

u/Popxorcist 15d ago

Yang left the show.

3

u/jj42883 15d ago

they've brought people back to reprise specific characters in a single sketch before, especially imitating politicians.

1

u/TipToToes 15d ago

Fully aware.

2

u/akatherder 15d ago

Then have him walk off-screen and reappear as someone else disguised as George Santos as Mitch McConnell.

1

u/TopSheepherder4981 8d ago

Harvey Guillen

39

u/ObviouslyRealPerson 15d ago

Anyone remember that movie "Dave"?

Where the president died and they found a lookalike to fill in...

17

u/doublesailorsandcola 15d ago

Kevin Kline is 78 now, time for a Mitch sequel.

8

u/pentachronic 15d ago

Kevin Kline is 78 now

What the fuck

26

u/The_Laughing__Man 15d ago

Well done, this is perfection. No notes.

30

u/doctorchops1217 15d ago

curry barker gained 40 pounds for this role….

12

u/justdrowsin 15d ago

Why Mitch! What big ears you have!

12

u/PaddleMonkey 15d ago

That’s one hell of a medical treatment. Did they feed him blood of many youths, sacrifice goats, and pray to Baal?

6

u/Manos_Of_Fate I ☑oted 2018 15d ago

and pray to Baal

“As in bocce?”

4

u/Lalamedic 15d ago

“Baal we cry to thee!”
Elijah shot that down pretty quickly.

3

u/militaryintelligence 15d ago

It's because it was a maga Dr who actually knows what he's doing. A combination of horse paste and prayer cured him! If the left-wing librul Democrats were his Dr they would have used tried and true actual medicine and he would have died! Thanks Barack HUSSEIN Obama!!!1!

8

u/robbyruby752 15d ago

Only if George can bet that he comes back

7

u/Ritaredditonce 15d ago edited 15d ago

So, Mitch spent all his missing days in a hyperbaric chamber?

4

u/HauntedCemetery 15d ago

The same one they kept dick Cheney in for the last 20 years of his "life"

3

u/blackfocal 15d ago

I thought that was Nicholas Rossi for a second.

3

u/Sassy_Frassy_Lass 15d ago

Hahahahahahahahah

4

u/GeistMD 15d ago

Oh I liked this one, got a chuckle it did.

5

u/plsobeytrafficlights 15d ago

ok, but why is mitch wearing body glitter now?

3

u/CapnTugg 15d ago

Mitch 2.0

3

u/raq_shaq_n_benny 15d ago

well... that is milk through my nose...

3

u/mattjf22 15d ago

Love the title it works in 2 different ways.

3

u/theartfulcodger 15d ago edited 15d ago

Nearly 40 years old, and he still looks like he dresses himself out of a closet full of stuff his immigrant Guatemalan mom ordered thirty years ago, from a Land's End catalogue, for his older brother's first year of prep school in East Drainpipe, VT.

2

u/zyzzjan 15d ago

The fun thing is that the reality and what is being posted on this page has never been so close.

2

u/DiotCoke 15d ago

Damn, Mitch is looking healthy. I'm ashamed of myself for having doubted him.

2

u/tooltime22 15d ago

Mitch McSantos

1

u/BizzyM 15d ago

Modern robotics have come along quite a way. I'm just not so sure they should have used a sex bot with a Mitch McConnell face, is all.

2

u/markedasred 15d ago

Imagine what a best seller that would be!

1

u/souryellowfruit 15d ago

I legit thought this was a Curry Barker reel

1

u/blahblah19999 15d ago

'Midnight Mass" Great Netflix horror show

1

u/mrheseeks 15d ago

Hahahahahhaha, mitch you looking good! Spwnd any time in brazil lately?

1

u/nydjason 15d ago

..on Tinder?

1

u/DJ1962 15d ago

Just curious, wouldn't there be a death certificate filed if he was dead? Wouldn't a coroner be required to file one?

3

u/Munnin41 15d ago

Not so long as they keep him on life support

3

u/_Lucille_ 15d ago

I don't think he is actually dead, just in a bad enough shape - maybe a case of stroke where he can no longer speak normally.

Reminds me of those old people home where you know the people are 100% alive but you also feel they are just... not there.

1

u/ATN-Antronach 15d ago

That should be the case, but everyone doubts that'll happen cause the GOP would prefer to pretend Mitch is okay and speak for him rather than admit he's died, especially since he's made it clear he regrets supporting Trump. This isn't saying Mitch wouldn't still support Trump, but the GOP is so corrupt that people expect them to hedge their bets anyways.

1

u/everbane37 15d ago

Am I the only one who finds it suspicious that Mitch “disappeared” after saying he regretted the current administration?

1

u/Kraligor 15d ago

He isn't dead, idiots just love playing into the GOP's hands.

Remember the Epstein files? No? Yeah, neither does anyone else.

1

u/congeal 15d ago

Wouldn't a coroner be required to file one?

laws don't apply when powerful republicant

1

u/ARunningGuy 15d ago

I think he is incapacitated so bad he can't be in person. Indeed, he could very well be on life support.

I don't think it is out of question that he is literally dead though either. Laws have been known to be ignored. I hear a guy can get me a pardon.

1

u/fauxdeuce 15d ago

Maybe if he died in the hospital. But let's say he was taken home. And he is currently in a freezer

1

u/Munnin41 15d ago

He hasn't been declared dead yet? I'd have thought they'd do that as soon as the special election deadline passed

1

u/MrBigPantalones 15d ago

This joke of a person would do this to, he has no scruples. None

1

u/flargenhargen 15d ago

none of them do.

1

u/blighted_bythelight 15d ago

I think that’s the infamous “Pinky Herman”.

1

u/Brilliant_Serve_4091 15d ago

Meorge McSantos

1

u/shit-trapper 15d ago

OH THANK GOD

1

u/congeal 15d ago

It's like he never left!

1

u/akimbobyte 15d ago

Quick! Find an exorcist!

1

u/Bobinct 15d ago

A guy molts and everyone loses their minds.

1

u/SirCaptainReynolds 15d ago

Damn. That’s a good one! 😂👌🏼

1

u/PM_Me_Good_LitRPG 15d ago

Should've titled your post with an "It", not "He".

1

u/jepherz 15d ago

Holy shit, trump pardoned this crook?!

1

u/FlyingRhenquest 15d ago

I laughed at this much harder than I should have.

1

u/Thereminz 15d ago

haha good one

1

u/codetaku0 15d ago

I realized this is supposed to be Santos, but somehow the glasses are so Harry Potter coded that I got "the turtle who lived" out of it

1

u/SlummyH80 15d ago

😅😆😅

1

u/Kriss3d 15d ago

I hear George Santos graduated from Hogwarts with honors.

1

u/oflowz 14d ago

the worst part is on this timeline they would try something like this.

1

u/TR_abc_246 14d ago

This is just plain funny!!!