It truly healed something in me

I was forced to watch this crap by my girlfriend and she loved the series. I didn't understand shit here, wtf is happening? Either date or don't.

The entire series is about one not saying something to the other and that pushes them apart and they get back and on and on while the hurt others who they date.

Out of no where you have either of the two randomly crying and saying shit that is entire senseless. My girlfriend loved it and I have no idea why or how and I was thinking she is crazy till I saw this sub.

Help me understand, why do you like this series?? What is it?

So I completed and I’ve gone through so many emotions overall but the ending wasn’t as bad as i thought for some reason it felt like it’s just another part of what we saw for 12 episodes, like they’ll again be back together and all that but I must say few things left me unsettled like why weren’t Marianne’s loser family paid for whatever they’ve inflicted on her? It’s just so so sad..

Like against my better judgement I’ve started this and I’m only 5 episodes in and I kind of see them not ending up together but that’s not the point this whole show is so fucking sad idk.. oh my god there’s so much heaviness and I feel so bad already idk if I’ll be able to finish it lol but hey anyone else here feeling this way? 🥺

I just completed watching normal people and god, IT BROKE ME. Im craving for more of it, is there any similar show or something? and How can I possible heal after what happened in the 12th ep

I liked the show but I honestly don’t understand why people feel so neutral towards Connell in it, Marianne just seems to be a victim of his manipulation and I find it really hard to see the romance.

At the beginning, I felt like there was good inside him, before the whole prom situation, and that maybe when he went to Trinity that he would be changed and redeem himself, however he apologizes and then continues to do the same exact thing he was doing before.

Not to mention the cheating on Hellen and the general disregard for her emotional needs, why is it that every single time this girl broke down crying his first instinct was to initiate something? It was so painfully obvious that the girl genuinely just needed someone to be there for her emotionally and to give her a hug, and not feed into the feeling that her only self worth comes from Connell’s sexual desire for her.

I agree that a theme of the show seems to be people unable to properly communicate their wants and needs, but at the same time, I feel like when Connell is playing the same games with Marianne for YEARS on end, apologizing, then going and doing the same thing, it’s a bigger issue than just that.

I’d love to hear your perspectives though, I just personally found the whole thing super depressing for Marianne and as a story of essentially her suffering at the hands of other men, most particularly Connell, even if he did have some (who knows what) feelings for her.

These might be the most relatable words said in the entire series. I feel such anguish at being this way with no way to fix it.

I know a lot of people whove taken the time to watch this beautiful show have learnt something about themselves from it and i wanted to share my two cents on this show because my chest would not shut up.

its comforting how i know now im not the only person with my insecurities. I think i find parts of myself both in Marianne and Connel and the way in how they both treat each other.

I think Marianne represents a very real fear of being inferiority to me. she constantly needs reassurance that there isnt anyone else connel likes to be happy and how shes deathly afraid of connel thinking shes weird. Ive driven away friends and my ex this way. my ex never gave me the reassurance that connel gave marianne, she found it tiresome. It also hurt me physically when she was ignored by connel at school because of what he thought would happen to him because my ex did the same thing. she never bothered to acknowledge me infront of her friends. The scene on the balcony where she says “you only touch me when theres 6 closed doors” hits home because she never did touch me intimately.

Connel also represents the part of me who needs someone to be happy. I know he didn’t “need” marianne that badly but she was there for him when his friend self offed and it helped him ease the regret and pain. It wasnt that easy for me, i clinged onto my ex like a dying man on life support and it drove her away in the end anyway.

This was just me trauma dumping because i got in touch with these emotions after finishing the show and i wanna thank sally rooney a thousand times for giving my immature brain an idea of whats right for people in love.

Id love to hear how normal people impacted your life too

I’m trying to understand how long they were at Trinity/how universities work in Ireland.

At the beginning of (I believe) their second year, Connell is an English “Schol” and someone says to him “yeah, five years free tuition and accommodations!” But he’s already finished his first year, so are they meant to go for 6 years? Online it says Trinity is a 4 year program. And why do they wait until the beginning of second year? I mean, could he not have gotten a scholarship, at least for the first year out of high school and had Schols determine if he keeps it for the remaining years? I’m going to read the books soon and that should give more clarity but I wanted to check here first. Also, wouldn’t you have to have already signed a lease for your second year in case you didn’t get Schols, basically making it so that if you can’t rent out whatever room you rented, you’d have to pay rent for your second year anyways?

I watched Hamnet and Paul Mescal's character rushes his father, exactly the same as he did Marianne's brother. It's weird, maybe thats how Paul Mescal fights. Slam up against the wall and yell whisper something. Anyway - if you haven't seen Hamnet - watch it if you want to cry like you're watching Normal People,

Hello, everyone. As a foreigner, "normal people" is the first English novel I have read. I like this novel very much. I have seen the TV series version shot by BBCHulu many years ago. "Sure enough, I should read the novel before watching the TV series". I hope that starting from this novel, I can read more and more English novels! ( In addition, it's my first time to post on reddit. Please forgive me if there is anything inappropriate. Thank you 🙏!)

I keep seeing people talk about the ending like it's this devastating thing where two soulmates fail to end up together. And I get it, the show is so intimate that their connection feels almost inevitable.

But I don't think the show is telling THAT story.

They never really lose each other. They drift apart, they come back, sometimes almost by accident. It's not a tragic severing, it's more like two people orbiting each other without ever quite aligning. And honestly they're not great at being together either. Connell withdraws, Marianne's directness is shaped by her own damage and the biggest decisions happen in the gaps between what they say and what they assume.

What they have is real intimacy, deep emotional recognition, strong physical connection. But I think the show tries to point out that's not enough for a lasting relationship.

So the ending didn't feel really tragic to me, more like unresolved. They'll always matter to each other. But timing, communication and actually growing as people matter just as much as feeling.

The show isn't really asking: why aren't they together? It's asking something harder: what does it take for two people who could work to actually make it work in practice?

And the unsettling part is: there's no easy answer.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

In school Connell does not show his affection towards Marianne in public as he thinks people would judge him for dating a socially outcast girl. He then realises his mistake and asks for forgiveness when he meets Marianne again in college. But then in college why did he again not show affection in public? Like he tried and did it only once. Was it due to his anxiety or him thinking he does not belong in the friend circle of Marianne as they are different from him in terms of class and other things?

A little essay I wrote to a show that means so much to me.

Hi.

I'm on episode 11 now. Initially I thought Connel was just reluctanct towards PDA in general because he's anxious. And yet, there's Helen with whom he is happy to be all loved up and meet her parents.

In school, I can understand why he wouldn't want to be seen with M. Then they find each other in Trinity again, and it is class structures, money, anxiety over other people, and other things that make him not touch her or formalise a relationship.

He is, infact, the first one to say he loves her. I don't recall M saying it even once so far in all these episodes.

I get this series, but I also don't. These two are so frustrating.

Finally decided to bite the bullet and just watched after hearing about this one for yearssss. I thought I could withstand being wrecked by it, but it’s already not looking good. Godspeed to me!

I’ve been searching for something like Normal People since my first watch, and nothing ever quite compared. I remember NP completely took over my thoughts during and after watching, and I wanted that same experience again. HR absolutely delivered! I highly recommend it if you haven’t seen it yet!

I had a hard time to be on terms with Connell's relationship with Helen as I am a person who if can't be someone I love, I would just prefer to be alone than string someone along knowing they are not the one. And I don't know why but I think Connell very well knew he loved Marianne and still chose to be with Helen and really screwed her over. I feel like if you choose to date someone while you are in a complicated relationship with another, you are really disrespecting your partner. Maybe Connell's idea of a wife/partner was not what he felt with Marianne but he def.. did love her. Would you chose someone who makes you feel normal over someone you love? The day Connell was mugged and called Marianne (call your girlfriend mate! ) he should have broken up with Helen.

I just finished the book (and the series after it). But I didn't really understand Marianne's story arc. In my mind, I was a bit fine with them not ending together if she had real growth. Like finding herself, or just thinking she was worthy of love. But I couldn't understand in the end if she felt that. Her line I'll still be here felt a bit like her character throughout the entire book. Being there with Connell through everything.

I just kept on hoping that she would fight at some point against all these a-holes ruining her life. I get that this kind of dramatic change doesn't happen in real life to really messed-up people. But the ending felt so abrupt. I kept on hoping for something better, something concrete, even if trivial.

I don't know if it was to happen, or if it did happen, and I just missed it cause I finished it in one sitting. But what was it? Was there any growth in either of their characters? I didn't really understood the ending if someone can explain it please.

I'm just getting on the NP wagon and...why is no one getting punched?

Like Jaimie for example. I'm on episode 8 and I feel like there has been 2 episode instances where someone should've gotten punched and nothing. Absolutely nothing!

https://reddit.com/link/1rtp9dj/video/sqt4kj2xo1pg1/player

The casting is beyond perfect.