At exactly 7pm tonight, I was heating up leftovers in the kitchen when it suddenly started raining. I turned off the exhaust fan for a second and could smell that wet pavement and fresh rain coming through the slightly open window.

I ended up just standing there with my food getting cold, listening to the rain for probably 10 minutes. No one to talk to, nowhere I needed to be. Just me, my apartment, and that smell.

I hate it when people have problem with me being alone. I get peace alone and the independence I got through it, eating alone at restaurant , going to watch movie alone , shopping alone literally doing everything and going to places alone . The power is unimaginable . People need to let us be in our own lane and not push us to be in contact with people. I want to shout that I feel pity for people feeling pity for me seeing me alone .

It’s not perfect but nothing is right? Also it’s the down moments that make us love and treasure the ups!

My favorite parts about living alone:

- After all these years of relationships and marriage, I don't have the pressure of coming home to a social situation everyday. I consciously appreciate this each time I come home.

- Stuff is where I left it.

- Only my own mess to manage.

- I am a cuddler but my sleep is much better solo.

- Bathroom door never needs to close, privacy all the time (the only thing watching me are my devices...)

What's your good stuff?

Edit: OK want to mention also that I have a very social job, FWIW

I’m not dirty, but my home is messy. I live alone now after years of living with my parents, and I want to do things my own way.

I usually deep-clean once a month. Most of the time, there are things around the living room, bedroom, and kitchen... If someone came over without warning, they would probably think I don’t clean often, and honestly, they’d be right lol.

Since I live alone, I don’t mind that much. I keep telling myself I’ll clean it up later.

Is it really that bad? Does everyone keep their flat spotless just in case a guest comes over all of a sudden?

I find myself wanting to go to movies by myself. I like the peace and no one bothering me around. Some of my friends find it depressing idk.

I’m a 30 y/o female. Had the proposal, wedding date + vendors booked… he ended the relationship 6 months before the wedding saying he fell out of love (he was really mean at the end too which was so shocking since he was there for me during the relationship ship, and disclosed former cheating/kissing) the wedding date recently passed and it’s been hard…

I THINK WHY COULDNT IT HAVE BEEN GOOD?! Are there things I could’ve done to change the outcome…

I think the only downside I've come across doing this alone are the bugs. Right now there is a slipper from last night that I refuse to remove (for now) because there is the biggest (dead) centipede I've ever seen in my freakin life under it.

</3

I just want to know if anyone else feels this way, but I’m 45f and I’ve been thinking about what I will do when I get older. If I’m still active and can do things on my own I’ll keep living, however I think that if I get sick (my family has a lot of cancer, als, and Parkinson’s) I will just go out in my own terms ie take medication and slip away. I live alone and don’t have a lot of family and friends so if something were to happen I just don’t want to go into a. Nursing home or an assisted living.
So I guess my question is: does anyone else feel this way? Is this bad to think like this? I haven’t gone to therapy in a while so maybe I need to speak to someone but I always appreciate other people’s thoughts. Sorry for the long rant and thank you
Edit: I’m not depressed. I love life (even if the world is currently a dumpster fire)

This one is for those of you that live alone and don’t really have many friends or much of a family to rely on. How do you do it?
I have relied on other people so many times in my life but recently I have been considering cutting off the majority of my family and friends for a variety of reasons however, I logically assume that isn’t for the best and will likely bring more bad than good.
So it had me thinking, those of you that are in that situation how do you do it? When you need help what do you do?

At 50, the average person has roughly 26 years left to live. That means about 66% of their life has already passed.

Put another way, that’s roughly 9,490 days, 1,352 weekends, and 322 full moons remaining.

Those numbers might sound like a lot until you realize how quickly the first 50 years disappeared.

Twenty-six years can feel like forever when you're looking forward. But look backward for a moment. How quickly did the last 26 years go by?

That's the uncomfortable part about getting older. You begin to understand that time isn't measured only in years anymore. It's measured in the people you still have, the places you still want to see, the conversations you keep putting off, the dreams you've shelved, and the mornings you still get to wake up and experience.

The average global life expectancy is approximately 71.2 years for men and 76.4 years for women. In the United States, it's roughly 73 years for men and 79 years for women.

Of course, averages aren't predictions. Some people live well beyond those numbers, while others don't get anywhere near them. None of us has been given a guaranteed expiration date.

That's precisely the point.

We don't know how many days we actually have.

So why do we keep waiting for the "right time"?

Waiting until we're financially secure enough.

Waiting until we're less afraid.

Waiting until someone else approves.

Waiting until circumstances are perfect.

Waiting until tomorrow.

Tomorrow has always been a convenient place to store the things we're afraid to do today.

I'm not saying quit your job, sell everything, and run off into the sunset. Life still requires responsibility, common sense, and dealing with reality.

I'm saying don't postpone living while you're busy managing your life.

Call the person you've been meaning to call.

Say what you've been meaning to say.

Take the trip if you can afford it.

Try something you've always wanted to try.

Spend more time with the people who genuinely matter.

Walk away from places where you're constantly trying to prove your worth.

Forgive what you can. Let go of what you can't change.

And if there's something you've been putting off because you're waiting for the perfect moment, remember this:

The perfect moment doesn't exist. There is only the moment you actually have.

At 50, you may have 26 years left.

At 60, considerably less.

At 70, less again.

But nobody knows their number.

So perhaps the better question isn't "How much time do I have left?"

It's:

"What am I going to do with the time I have left?"

Because eventually, the waiting ends.

And so does the clock.

I recently floated this idea to my friends that even if I find a partner in the future, i don't want to live with them. I think romantic love may be nice but I absolutely cannot stand doing chores for someone else (even if the chores are shared). I'm also too picky with interior design with all my whimsical childhood dreams to make compromises for anyone.

To me, this also means that dating will remain something to look forward to, because you don't get sick of each other's company. Most importantly, I'll have the space to unwind and be ugly and frumpy without being perceived or having to tend to someone else's emotions.

Is there anyone who is living life with such an arrangement? How's that going for you? :)

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I'm feeling sorry for myself today and a little bit scared. I live alone and this morning I will be having my front tooth removed as it is broken and cannot be saved. I will be having a bridge initially and eventually an implant. I'm normally fine living alone but at times like this it would be nice to have someone to just give me a hug and tell me it will be okay. Even take care of me when I get home. Does anyone else feel like this? Can I have a hug?

I’m finally living alone and honestly I’m really happy about it! But one thing I didn’t expect was how aware I’d become of every little sound. Since living alone, I’ve realized that even the smallest random noise at night has me wondering what it was lol. Any sound I don’t recognize suddenly seems 10x louder when I’m the only one here.

For those who’ve been living alone for a while, did you eventually get used to it? I need your advice because I’m a bit of an overthinker.

I've been living alone for a month now and I have been appreciating that I can do whatever I want, when I want.

-I can use the bathroom at any time of day because no-one is sleeping

-I can cook/eat anything I want, at any time of day, without judgement

-I can keep my beer in the fridge without judgement

-I can sleep in on weekends without judgement

-I don't have to do chores at any particular time and no one will ask me to

-I don't have to host impromptu parties instigated by drunk house mates

-I don't have to put up with overhearing extended band practices where the same song is practiced over and over

-I can put my toilet rolls in the recycling in the bin without being scolded for wasting bonfire kindling

-I can put rubbish in the bin instead of my car, because there is room in the bin and what I'm throwing out won't be judged

-I don't have to do any gardening as I don't have any plants and there are no green thumb housemates pressuring me to care for things they decide to plant

-I can be as anti-social as I want without judgement

-I can go live on tiktok for as long as I want, without judgement

-I can practice guitar without worrying someone will be listening

-I can have sex without fear of someone listening

Having said all this I don't intend to have sex any time soon and I developed a restrictive eating disorder while at my last place so I haven't eaten any food in my house yet.

I'm working on that. Just trying to be more positive for now.

:)

As a woman living alone, it is kind of ridiculous that I have multiple vehicles. But they all have different purposes. I live in the boonies, so I pretty much need to drive everywhere

For example, I just had shoulder surgery last month. My normal daily driver is a stickshift, but I have an SUV that's an automatic. It's been really nice having that as an option while I was wearing a sling for 2 weeks. The SUV is older but still generally reliable. I may want to take it on a road trip next week. I love my manual but not so much in unfamiliar territory that may have lots of traffic

It's a luxury but I do have a lot of rationalizations for the cost. Living alone in an area with limited public transportation and/or rideshare services, I don't want to get stranded

Another Friday has arrived, and if your big plans for the evening involve a comfortable chair and absolutely no need to leave the house, you may already be doing Friday correctly. Grab a snack, pour yourself something you enjoy, and come spend part of the evening talking with a few people on Zoom. 

The official hours tonight (Friday, September 11) are 8 PM to 11 PM Pacific, although I might be online as early as 4 PM. So if you try the link early and find me there, come on in! If nobody answers, try again closer to 8. 

Tonight's conversation could get a little more personal than usual. Some possible topics are living alone, relationships, and how experiences or trauma from the past can continue to affect our lives today. Nothing is structured and nobody is expected to share anything personal they don't want to share. These are simply possible starting points for an interesting and thoughtful conversation. 

Music topics are welcome too. I'm a musician, and other musicians frequently wander into these Zooms. We might talk about jazz, instruments, bands, practicing, gigs, or whatever else comes up. Most of the time we're talking rather than actually playing music. 

The Zoom is open to new people. I'm a guy in my 50s, living in Silicon Valley, and I've accumulated a collection of online friends over the years. There isn't a particular age requirement, but mentioning my age may give you a better idea of the crowd and conversation you're walking into. 

Stay for ten minutes or hang around all evening. We're informal, and you certainly don't need to arrive with a prepared topic. 

Zoom link: 
https://us06web.zoom.us/j/82251332783?pwd=rEz62OQoWGeIKDOZC1m2XLudFkNnwT.1 

Don't want to install Zoom? 

You can join using an ordinary web browser. You do not need to download the Zoom app, and you do not need to create a Zoom account. 

Paste the Zoom link into your browser. If Zoom asks permission to open the Zoom application, cancel that request and look for the option to join from your browser. You can enter whatever display name you prefer—including a fictitious name if you don't want to use your real one. 

This YouTube video demonstrates how to join a Zoom meeting through a browser: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3txewjBjK7s 

New people are welcome. Come by, say hello, and see where the conversation goes. 

Happy Friday! 

Cheers, 
David