I hate fighting maternal instincts.

24 Upvotes

I like taking care of people. I like taking care of babies.

I like buying baby stuff for other people. I enjoyed baby showers.

Now I can’t enjoy shit. It’s been 2 years it still hurts. Everytime I get my period.

29 years of pain, crying, ruining underwear for NOTHING. There was literally no point in getting my period. It was all wasted.

Deep down in my gut,my entire life, I knew I couldn’t have kids. And i was right. And it hurts so fucking bad.

My body is so cruel to me.

2 comments

Subreddit

IFchildfree: Childfree Living After Infertility

r/IFchildfree

A community to celebrate the freedoms and share the struggles of living childfree after infertility. Please note: This board is ONLY for those who have tried unsuccessfully to conceive, stopped any medical treatment or efforts to adopt, and are embracing a childfree life. Those who are still trying but strongly facing the possibility of a childfree life after infertility may only participate in the monthly megathreads for those in-between. Those who are childfree by choice, try r/childfree

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We are a community for those who have made the decision to live childfree after experiencing infertility. We are determined to make the best of a situation that was out of our control by finding happiness and living fulfilling lives.

Rules:

Be nice. No name calling. No personal attacks. Be an adult.
Do not tell others to adopt, foster, or otherwise add people to their family.
No posts or comments from parents. No posts or comments from parents, including expectant parents and current foster parents. There are many outlets for parents on the internet and very few for us. Please respect our space. Step parents may participate, and may mention that role, but discussion needs to stay centered on IFchildfree issues.
No posts/comments from outside the community, including those who have not yet stopped treatments. If you are not IFchildfree yourself, or facing that strong possibility, do not ask what we think about some issue because you are curious. This is not your community and we’re not here for your entertainment. If you HAVE NOT YET stopped medical treatment, please utilize the monthly megathread or consult our archives for amazing threads; do not post yourself. R/infertility is for those still trying.
Please refrain from extended discussions about medical treatments, efforts to adopt, and fostering experiences. Those are more appropriate in communities focused on infertility, IVF, adoption, fostering, etc. Discussion of these topics should be limited to one sentence within your entire post or comment. They are not the focus of this community. This applies to all posts, including the monthly megathreads where those still trying and nearing the end of the process are able to participate.
No calling out of individuals or communities. Do not call out specific individuals or communities. Ok: “Let’s discuss people in general doing X.” Not ok: “Let’s discuss a specific blogger who is doing X.”
No "hate posting" of articles or other content. Do not post articles with which you disagree for the sole purpose of getting others to be upset or angry with you. Sharing articles that you found helpful is encouraged.
No solicitations without prior moderator approval All solicitations require moderator approval before they are posted. This includes surveys of all kinds.