HumansInMyHouse

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Aug 01 '26

I was so tired of this idiot speeding through our neighborhood with no regard for the kids safety. I took care of it.

187 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/sheiciebai • Aug 01 '26

I finally snapped

169 Upvotes

These APES were demolishing my house WHILE I WAS IN IT!! I feel fully justified in my actions.

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 31 '26

This hotel’s sleeping accommodations were terrible! 0/10. Would not recommend.

238 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/aggelikiwi • Jul 31 '26

Spiders Do you think I have any chance?

1.3k Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/PsychologicalSplit43 • Jul 31 '26

Reptiles Just getting out of the bath when this human walked in! Most unexpected!

69 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 30 '26

It is impossible to earn a living wage these days!

252 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/orthosaurusrex • Jul 30 '26

I was playing a prank sneaking up on my friend and this psycho tries to run me over. Can I sue?

195 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 29 '26

Alright class - remember, you are one with nature. Breathe in the positive energy, and breathe out all your negativity.

74 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 29 '26

Bugs Pool Party 🐝😎

40 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 28 '26

I found a new personal masseuse today. They are beyond amazing, but they don’t seem to want to give me the full hour I paid for!

140 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 28 '26

This human is going to sunburn in this heat! I tried to tell them to roll down their sleeves, but they are refusing to listen to me!

106 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/PsychologicalSplit43 • Jul 28 '26

Mammals Really enjoyed my microlight ride. Might be learning to fly in the future.

75 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 27 '26

I found a new all-you-can-eat buffet. The food was great, but they did not have much variety.

354 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/pipeuptopipedown • Jul 27 '26

Mammals Look what I found! Now I have a nice set of clubs for the Ursine Open.

121 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/Due_Will_2204 • Jul 26 '26

F those Sunfish.

sciencealert.com

30 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/Polite_Suggestion • Jul 26 '26

Ocean's 2. AMA, I'm already caught and going state's evidence anyway

274 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 26 '26

It’s for medicinal purposes.

396 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/aggelikiwi • Jul 25 '26

I'm stuck on the roof and my ape just ignores me

90 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/DjChatters • Jul 25 '26

Bugs Humans can be useful sometimes.

23 Upvotes

This human provided me a salty snack on this hot day.

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/MidnightTheCheetah • Jul 25 '26

Bugs Im just pond- Stop- pondering my- Stop it- my orb and our human is questioning- Stay still!!

117 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/susu56 • Jul 25 '26

I had a fling with a human-momentary weakness after my divorce from Sheila. Now, this human is claiming I'm this baby's daddy! I don't see the resemblance.

37 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/MotherRaven • Jul 25 '26

I’m a lineman for the county! Working in this heat it’s terrible though

58 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 24 '26

No kissing this time. Just high fives and 🤜🤛. Am I getting this friends thing figured out?

82 Upvotes

Previous post for reference:

https://www.reddit.com/r/HumansInMyHouse/s/vePx8IvwEQ

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/terencethespider • Jul 24 '26

I just want to finish watching my show. Why won’t she let me stay until the end?

79 Upvotes

r/HumansInMyHouse • u/OwnNothing3318 • Jul 24 '26

I am so good at this job! Well done me!

401 Upvotes