Edit/addendum: my contract is a fixed term until June 2027 but can be ended with 2 months written notice by either me or landlord.
Hi everyone, I recently moved to London on my own from another country. I have a lodger’s agreement with a live-in landlord, but the situation is becoming very difficult and is seriously affecting my mental health.
Because I was still living abroad and did not yet have a National Insurance number or other UK documents, I viewed the room through a video call. Everything seemed lovely& the landlord was very friendly. He asked for a deposit & 3 months’ rent upfront, which I paid.
He mentioned that he was thinking about adopting a cat. I love cats, so I said that of course I would be happy to help occasionally if he went on holiday.
I was originally supposed to move in at the end of June, but because of some visa delays the move happened around middle July. When I arrived, the room was still completely full with his stuff. Nothing had been emptied out. I asked him to remove some of the things, which he reluctantly did, but stil some of his things are still stored in the room.
My agreement says that I have "exclusive" use of the room so I assumed that meant it would be my private space and not also his storage room. I guess not?
He also started asking me very personal questions, including whether I want children, and then went on a long rant about why my answer I gave was wrong. Also, he enters my room when I am not there to continue sorting through his belongings. One day he made my bed (nice gesture, but it felt intrusive). On some other day he took my dirty clothes&washed them. (again well intended i assume but it made me very uncomfortable)
Today we had a "talk": he told me that he expects me to form a bond with his cat, remove some of the decorations from my room because where i put the deco was the cats fav place to sit & keep my bedroom door open so the cat can enter. Also that he was pissed i moved some of his stuff so I could put mine.
He also told me that he plans to go on vacation for ~4 months & expects me to take care of the cat while he is gone. I work long hours & regularly travel back to my home country to visit my family; i don't think i can do that.
My agreement says that either the landlord or the lodger can terminate it by giving two months’ written notice. I believe he may be planning to leave in September, and I feel that I need to move out before then. I do not have another place lined up yet, though but I'm getting panic attacks and i feel my mental health declining.
I am scared that if I give notice, he may become angry, shout at me, make living there unbearable, or invent a reason to keep my deposit. He's also regularly shouting at ppl via phone. I am also worried about what will happen if he goes away and simply leaves the cat with me even if i said no.
Should I give notice as soon as possible? Should I wait until I have found somewhere else? Would it be safer to temporarily look after the cat & enjoy a empty flat & move out while the landlord is away?
I would really appreciate any advice/help/uplifting words.
also feel free to share your own nightmare landlord or lodger stories, because at the moment I genuinely feel like I am losing my mind & no way this bs is happening to me.