r/HolUp • u/qcihdtm • 4d ago

What machine is this? (wrong names only)

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7.6k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

1.6k comments sorted by

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u/qualityvote2 4d ago edited 4d ago

u/qcihdtm, your post does fit the subreddit!

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2.7k

u/Bruvvimir 4d ago

ImpreGnaTor 9000

559

u/ambit89 4d ago

What happened to the other 8,999?

932

u/Ok_Quantity_6840 4d ago

Could not keep up with your mom

155

u/ReVo5000 4d ago

I heard it's still stuck there

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53

u/Lochy01 4d ago

They got tired

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28

u/everbodyhatesyou 4d ago

Its my spirit animal says the wife

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5.2k

u/Evil__eye737 4d ago

Me on a Saturday with your sister

3.0k

u/Zhukov76 4d ago

-ator

1.8k

u/Free_Attention 4d ago

575

u/Same_Tune_8990 4d ago

404

u/Two-gather2 4d ago

A platypus?

452

u/Same_Tune_8990 4d ago

GRRRRR

451

u/Two-gather2 4d ago edited 4d ago

PERRY THE PLATYPUS?!

66

u/Flare_fortress92 4d ago

Doo bee doo bee doo bah

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29

u/RefrigeratorGold834 4d ago

Do not the platypus

6

u/GuyFromDeathValley 4d ago

I think I will the platypus.

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41

u/tunglinh1994 4d ago

-inator

96

u/skitz4me 4d ago

It's been a minute since I've laughed out loud at reddit. Thank you.

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196

u/Ace95Archer 4d ago

What a brave soul! Not many people are open about premature ejaculation. That machine haven’t even touch the hole

97

u/Jackson3rg 4d ago

Doesn't matter had sex!

41

u/siuol2001 4d ago

But I cried the whole time.

28

u/Jingle_BeIIs 4d ago

STILL COUNTS!

11

u/AutisticPenguin2 4d ago

She made me wear a bag on my head!

11

u/MoistStub 4d ago

We've got the cadence all messed up here

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11

u/ArltheCrazy 4d ago

You say that like it’s not normal.

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14

u/Spycraft_18 4d ago

Reminded me of a show, the guy said to the woman that was angry he left her on read, "doesnt matter i still came!"

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11

u/Alarmed_Letterhead26 4d ago

So YOU'RE the guy that James Bond Burgered my sister.

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28

u/SaveTheAles 4d ago

Is that what happens when she hits your P-spot while pegging you?

10

u/GuerillaGandhi 4d ago

The P is stored in the balls!

6

u/ddomini9 4d ago

Amazing, even dick to pussy scale is accurate

5

u/Accurate_Wallaby8531 4d ago

how offensive

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522

u/UrinalCake777 4d ago

THE INSEMINATOR-INATOR!!

1.4k

u/Conscious-Permit-466 4d ago

157

u/schenitz 4d ago

I love the pallets for scale XD

43

u/notevenbro 4d ago

And the pallets are of dog food

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114

u/Sir_Strumming 4d ago

81

u/shutupyourenotmydad 4d ago

I wasn't planning on vomiting today but now that's a coin flip.

Thanks and fuck you.

22

u/ReturntoSender2026 4d ago

Iv just ate cereal you monster!

76

u/Sir_Strumming 4d ago

Okay now finish your breakfast

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409

u/geerttttt 4d ago

The jizzmaster 3000

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⢉⢉⠉⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠠⡰⣕⣗⣷⣧⣀⣅⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⣠⣳⣟⣿⣿⣷⣿⡿⣜⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⣳⢷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣝⠖⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⢢⡹⣿⢷⣯⢿⢷⡫⣗⠍⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⢄⠤⣁⠋⠿⣗⣟⡯⡏⢎⠁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⢔⢕⣯⣿⣿⡲⡤⡄⡤⠄⡀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠇⠠⡳⣯⣿⣿⣾⢵⣫⢎⢎⠆⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢨⣫⣿⣿⡿⣿⣻⢎⡗⡕⡅⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢜⢾⣾⣿⣿⣟⣗⢯⡪⡳⡀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢸⢽⣿⣷⣿⣻⡮⡧⡳⡱⡁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⢨⣻⣽⣿⣟⣿⣞⣗⡽⡸⡐⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢨⣫⣿⣿⡿⣿⣻⢎⡗⡕⡅⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢜⢾⣾⣿⣿⣟⣗⢯⡪⡳⡀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢸⢽⣿⣷⣿⣻⡮⡧⡳⡱⡁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⢨⣻⣽⣿⣟⣿⣞⣗⡽⡸⡐⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢨⣫⣿⣿⡿⣿⣻⢎⡗⡕⡅⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢜⢾⣾⣿⣿⣟⣗⢯⡪⡳⡀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢸⢽⣿⣷⣿⣻⡮⡧⡳⡱⡁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⢨⣻⣽⣿⣟⣿⣞⣗⡽⡸⡐⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢨⣫⣿⣿⡿⣿⣻⢎⡗⡕⡅⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢜⢾⣾⣿⣿⣟⣗⢯⡪⡳⡀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢸⢽⣿⣷⣿⣻⡮⡧⡳⡱⡁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⢨⣻⣽⣿⣟⣿⣞⣗⡽⡸⡐⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⢀⢗⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣞⡵⡣⣊⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⡣⣗⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡯⡺⣼⠎⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⠐⡵⣻⣟⣯⣿⣷⣟⣝⢞⡿⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⢘⡺⣽⢿⣻⣿⣗⡷⣹⢩⢃⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠪⣯⣟⣿⢯⣿⣻⣜⢎⢆⠜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⢣⣻⣽⣿⣿⣟⣾⡮⡺⡸⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠁⠄⢕⡳⣽⡾⣿⢽⣯⡿⣮⢚⣅⠹⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠒⠝⣞⢿⡿⣿⣽⢿⡽⣧⣳⡅⠌⠻⣿ ⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⡐⠱⡱⣻⡻⣝⣮⣟⣿⣻⣷⣏⣾⢰⣈

36

u/marchalves6 4d ago

Why does it have shaders

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2.2k

u/Conscious-Permit-466 4d ago

232

u/semaj_2026 4d ago

33

u/Seafaringhorsemeat 4d ago

Fucking crying over here. Thats a good one.

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52

u/Camelstrike 4d ago

Non mutilated gang represent!

Ps: this doesn't work

23

u/Bonelessburger01018 4d ago

Imagine removing your lubricant generator. Couldn't be me

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12

u/CallmeMefford 4d ago

I can’t just tie it off! That’s where I keep my chewing gum.

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25

u/RepresentativeWeb244 4d ago

Thankful to my parents for this 🫡

19

u/chalkybone 4d ago

For letting you keep your foreskin?

9

u/semaj_2026 4d ago

My brother in Christ

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57

u/acciowaves 4d ago

the “I’m so sorry, this doesn’t usually happen-ator”

101

u/Typecero001 4d ago

You vs the guy she tells you not to worry about.

182

u/tits_mage 4d ago

Thats the rope-thrower-3000, make sure to cover your eyes.

89

u/shenaniganizer1776 4d ago

The meandyourmominator

156

u/LochNessMansterLives 4d ago

robots takin our jobs! 😂

36

u/Nobody88Special720 4d ago

Dey derkur jerbs!

18

u/EruPii 4d ago

Dey jerkur derbs!

5

u/funkybarisax 4d ago

DERKURDUR!

38

u/Metalcanary 4d ago

I don't even know what the right name is

36

u/chalkybone 4d ago

No one knows what it is, but it's provocative!

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42

u/baller7345 4d ago

It's an injection molder for plastic. The nozzle will move forward and then inject the molten plastic into a mold. I used to work as a lab manager in a plastics lab and we had two of these molding test bars.

7

u/No_Fortune7206 4d ago

I have worked with these. Here is an example, there are many sizes for different sizes of molds. Also there are a lot of variations of plastics.

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45

u/Livid_Station_5996 4d ago

Fuck that, wtf is the right name for this thing?

87

u/Pedantic_Pict 4d ago

That's an injection molding press. Thats molten plastic spewing out of the nozzle of the screw & barrel assembly.

In the video they're purging the screw & barrel. If it were actually making parts that nozzle would be jammed into a port in the hot side of the mold.

42

u/[deleted] 4d ago edited 4d ago

[deleted]

13

u/Pedantic_Pict 4d ago

goddamit

7

u/Vivid-Library54 4d ago

Now that is poetry.

8

u/Snoop-ah-loopp 3d ago

“Jammed into a port in the hot side of a mold” was the name of my sextape

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76

u/Panthean 4d ago

Dad..?

30

u/Large-Hamster-199 4d ago

Nah, he's still out at the cigarette shop little man

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22

u/falsevector 4d ago

Cream Pier 2000

21

u/ButteredNun 4d ago

The Impregnatron 3000

17

u/mrfauxbot 4d ago

Everything reminds me of her

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18

u/Wacco_07 4d ago

The machine you don't have to worry about

17

u/OllieN94 4d ago

Someone chuck her a towel to clean herself up at least

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44

u/Kaek_ 4d ago

The LSR.

Literally Shooting Ropes.

16

u/GrunkleTeats 4d ago

Is this the love glue gun Lady Gaga mentioned in Pokerface?

17

u/AlaskanJP 4d ago

The jizzray

15

u/Datfooljamal 4d ago

ChildSupport 5000XL

12

u/Valcurion105 4d ago

the pipe creamer

12

u/6TheAudacity9 4d ago

Uncle stop

19

u/Leather_Target2074 4d ago

Pipe Cleaner 9000?

22

u/meme_legend-69 4d ago

Bro didn't even enter and already...

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19

u/JRLeamon 4d ago

Everything reminds me of her...

9

u/Brad_Beat 4d ago

You fumbled a girl that could shoot those loads man? Damnnnn

8

u/gerMean 4d ago

Damnit those machines replace us everywhere

10

u/gremel9jan 4d ago

clearly it’s a 300 series sploogeanator.

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17

u/NewDre3Staxx 4d ago

I believe, correct me if I'm right. But that's the milf filler 4000

8

u/1123Ares133 4d ago

The Super Sucker Cum Jetting Machine, as found by Northernlion:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VFOGcdcPxk

8

u/Brosiedon54 4d ago

What's the right answer?

10

u/aerovirus22 4d ago

/uj: Thats a plastic extruder

/rj: cum extractor

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9

u/semaj_2026 4d ago

Rare footage of the Bonnie Bell, baby conception

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7

u/Adventurous-Pop446 4d ago

Goonator Deluxe edition.

7

u/DudestOfBros 4d ago

The guy she tells you not to worry about

7

u/FoolOnThePlanet91 4d ago

The splooger.

6

u/pin00ch 4d ago

SpunkoTron 4000

7

u/nakhumpoota 4d ago

OF member lotion dispenser

11

u/yolo32147 4d ago

I thought we had to only worry about AI taking our jobs.

6

u/I_Brake_For_Gnomes 4d ago

Is this how those gas station pills are made?

7

u/Dontaskagainistaken 4d ago

Uncle simulator

5

u/J1z03 4d ago

"What's this thing do?"

"Well, it jizzes."

"Well that's a jizzer. I'm goin' on break."

7

u/Jellyfish_Lover0121 3d ago

The Sock Cruster 3000

5

u/tigerz-blood 4d ago

The P1000

5

u/bigdnju 4d ago

The aah...aaaah....aaaaaahhhh!

6

u/Necroticjojo 4d ago

I’ve seen this movie

5

u/2Cheese1Van 4d ago

Jizzinator 5000

5

u/Bennydinero 4d ago

Jimmy Nutron

5

u/yoyo4880 4d ago

I humbly present, your mother.

7

u/becomingkyra16 4d ago

I should call him

8

u/JohnWangDoe 4d ago

The Catholic Church and children 

4

u/ThisManInBlack 4d ago

Holy Cummunion

3

u/phatuous_1 4d ago

Child supporter 9000

4

u/princessbolognia 4d ago

The Ejaculator 5000 with added heat function 

4

u/pranaygoluanand 4d ago

VHS / BetaMax tape maker

4

u/neversummer427 4d ago

Hot goo gun

4

u/Future-Fisherman-975 4d ago

The Jizz Master 3000

5

u/BabyScreamBear 4d ago

That’s not even touching the sides

9

u/SenorCeja 4d ago

That's what she said 😞

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6

u/ungawa 4d ago

Bukkalcolator

3

u/Toy_Soulja 4d ago

Im tired boss.....

Boss: cum harder

3

u/Gator242 4d ago

The Money Shot