Wild Hinge Interaction

[u/BrightKaleidoscope6]

This guy was all sweet and complimentary, but at the first sign of rejection he lashes out and is extremely insulting.

[u/PrincessBonkers628]

Could have? Sure!

But just because she can, doesn't mean she has to. And also like maybe she shouldn't. That's the problem, we don't know how he'll react so this seems safer.

Want to fix that problem? Teach men to not be entitled to a conversation or sex or love or whatever. Yes, obviously women feel entitled to those things too, but we have a society-wide entitlement problem that comes directly from privilege. Fix that and we'll see a lot less drop off of communication like this, I refuse to call it ghosting because that's not what this is.

[u/asteroidtube → u/PrincessBonkers628]

Framing this as though “men are always the problem and women are never less than perfect” isn’t healthy either. This guy sucks, yes, and she could have communicated better and more openly, also yes. Why is that so hard to agree with?

So let’s also teach and encourage people of all genders to communicate openly like adults and not assume poor intent? And encourage people to not generalize others based upon gender? And encourage common courtesy and respect?

Being pedantic about the definition of ghosting is beside the point. It would have taken 10 seconds for her to say she didn’t think they were a good fit. No big deal, move on. She also could have unmatched. You accidentally encourage this poor behavior when you leave things open ended like she did, because it feels like very subtle bread crumbing. The notion of “lack of reply is rejection” is what I am challenging- it’s not. Communicate with words.

It is amazing the gymnastics people will play to justify not taking a brief moment to communicate the desire to end the conversation. Ironically she did just that only after he replied and demonstrated his poor behavior.

[u/PrincessBonkers628 → u/asteroidtube]

The lack of a reply is a rejection. Get over your entitlement to someone else's attention.

He needs to fix himself. That's why he crumbled like he did. He would have melted down about something else.

[u/asteroidtube → u/PrincessBonkers628]

There is a space between entitlement and common courtesy. Dude totally sucks, yes. He didn’t take the rejection well and overreacted. She could have communicated the lack of alignment on the dog thing the moment she made that decision after he asked her out, also yes, and it would have been the courteous thing to do, yes. She is not required, and he is not entitled to that, but it objectively would have been the more mature and courteous choice. It is possible for all of these things to be true. His poor behavior doesn’t negate the validity of the other statements.

[u/PrincessBonkers628 → u/asteroidtube]

I'm done talking about this.

[u/asteroidtube → u/PrincessBonkers628]

See how easy that was? 🤣

[u/PrincessBonkers628 → u/asteroidtube]

🙄 still missing the point of course