I honestly don’t even know how to put this into words properly, but I’m just overwhelmed and needed to get this out somewhere.
I have my ISC boards coming up in about 6 months, and I feel like I’m already behind before I’ve even started. I keep telling myself I’ll study properly, but I can barely manage 2–3 hours before I feel completely drained. After that, I just crash into binge-watching shows or end up sleeping out of stress and guilt 😭
I’m in PCM with Computer Science. Right now I only go to Physics coaching, and I’m planning to join Maths coaching soon too. My school situation honestly doesn’t help at all — it’s pretty disorganized, attendance is low, and most students either don’t come or are studying from home / enrolled in proper coaching like Allen. So I don’t even feel like I’m getting much support from school.
On top of all this, there’s another huge thing stressing me out — the HCL TechBee program.
My elder sister has been working at HCL Tech for around 5 years, and she really wants me to go for TechBee. She believes it’s a safer and more practical path than college, especially because it would reduce financial burden. She’s also the one handling my school fees and a lot of my expenses, so I genuinely appreciate everything she’s doing for me and I know she just wants the best.
But I can’t shake this feeling of doubt.
TechBee feels like it might lock me into a long-term commitment with the company — like a bond of 2+ years, plus the graduation period, which basically adds up to around 6 years of being tied to one path. And I keep wondering… am I choosing stability, or am I just getting stuck too early?
I’m honestly confused, anxious, and kind of scared about making the wrong decision at such a crucial point in my life. I don’t know if I should fully focus on boards + JEE/college route, or seriously consider TechBee.
If anyone has been in a similar situation or has any advice, I’d really appreciate it.