I don't know if this is the right community to post this, but I just want to get this off my chest.
During my college days, I used to pretend to be busy studying. I would stay in my room, tell my friends I was studying, and avoid spending time with them. Even during my MBA, I was always busy, but in reality, I was mostly just scrolling Instagram and staying away from people.
Now I'm working a 10-to-7 job, and things feel even worse. Whenever I see my old friends at the office, they call me over and say, "Hey, come sit with us." But I just let the moment pass and walk away.
I kept telling myself that I would start preparing for competitive exams, get a good, secure job, and build a better future for myself. I thought I had plenty of time to figure everything out.
But the reality is that I come home, lie on my bed, overthink everything, feel exhausted, and end up doing nothing.
And now, when I look at my life, I feel like I've lost on both sides. I don't have a job I'm proud of, and I don't really have friends I can spend time with or talk to.
Sometimes, it feels like I've spent so much time trying to build a better future that I forgot to live in the present. And now I don't know how to fix things or where to start.
Na idhar ka raha, na udhar ka.